Quote: (04-30-2017 01:29 PM)AFS Wrote:
Never fall for the "victim" card.
I've come to appreciate how much the conventional female outlook on life represents a suspended and transformed childhood...
Being a parent has illustrated how this goes.
When an infant doesn't get what it wants it cries. As a child gets older the crying moderates to whining. When the child grows up the whining shifts to nagging and pussy-hats. In all cases it's about always feeling dependent on others or institutions to provide what you want rather than getting it yourself. Women just sugarcoat this passivity by calling it "romance" or "social-justice".
I think the idea of a self-reliant woman runs counter to this biological programming. The more a woman projects a sense of entitlement the more high-maintenance she's going to be and the more easily she'll lapse into nagging or enter into a fight. The phrase "you never/always" is always on the tip of a woman's tongue.
I think all red-flags circle back to the above, hence pretty much all women have them to some degree.
So what I'm now looking for is not a NAWALT so much as a woman who is:
a) Reflective enough to spot her own self-defeating bullshit
b) Humble enough to admit to her own flaws
c) Sees her life as a constant WIP
That to me is the definition of emotional maturity, to not be perfect, but merely to acknowledge that you're flawed and always strive to improve.