[Basil II]

How often should you be initiating contact with a girl you're steadily working towards sex with and girls that you are dating? Should you text them every day between dates?

I'm 3 dates in with a girl, she asked me to message her good morning every morning when I told her about my daily morning ritual. Sounds good that we touch base everyday but it also feels like that would send a terrible pedastalisation worship message since she's the first person I'd communicate with and think about every day. Is a daily good morning message normal practice or only for betas?

TLDR: How frequently and what time in the day are best to send messages?

Cheers

[Mufasa]

No good morning messages.
How frequently if different for everyone but a great place to start is to stick to logistics in texts--get in, set a date, get out, confirm date the day of. To me this works most effectively if you have a loud personality or have hooked her hard and she definitely wants to see you again.

As you get better with game and advance in other areas in your life I would change this to whenever you feel like it. Still don't do good morning texts unless you're inviting her over for breakfast or taking her out to breakfast.
Im at a point where Im starting a business and between that in my everyday job texting girls is becoming a nuisance and a less than thrilling part of my day. The way I feel now explains and totally makes sense why players tell you to text half as much as the girls do.

[wi30]

Don't do it. That's the gayest thing ever. That might be acceptable if it's your girlfriend of 4 years and you're out of town for a week. It's definitely not okay with a girl that hasn't seen your penis.

Err on the side of being too distant vs. too clingy.

As far as texting ratios are concerned, you want a three to one ratio of effort. Even before game I wasn't a big texter. But when you scroll up through the conversation, you should ideally see the majority of messages and the length of messages from her. Timing is another aspect entirely. Take at a minimum the same amount of time to respond. It's better if it's a lot worse than her because you are genuinely busy. You shouldn't have time to text her back quickly.

[Basil II]

I appreciate the replies, confirms what I was thinking. I'll chalk this one up to another case of girls asking for things that they actually don't want.

[questor70]

I hate texting. Clingy women with boring dayjobs love to text in the middle of the day and they get bent out of shape if you don't text back within seconds. It's a never-ending stream of shit-tests and I can't concentrate on my work if I am worrying about when the next text might come in.

Texting is for logistics, not open-ended "how are you?" and "I miss you " type stuff.

A couple emails a day is fine but risks turning a relationship into a pen-pal. Everyone's life is an unfolding story. You can hint at this or that drama that's going on during the weak which builds some tension for the next date.

[Vill@in]

(02-16-2017 01:41 AM)Basil II Wrote:  

I'm 3 dates in with a girl, she asked me to message her good morning...

She asked you...? Tell her you are too busy to text her every morning.

Also, 3 dates in and no sex. Are you getting close? Have you fingered her, received a blowjob, dry humped? If no to any of those, it's probably time to start looking for another target. You can't negotiate attraction, so if it's not there for her....it's not there. She may have put you in orbiter category, and just wants your attention for her own validation.

[Fortis]

If you have to ask whether or not to message something to a girl then you shouldn't message it to her. That's always been my standard.

[XXL]

The audacity of those girls....

Ask her to give you a kiss every morning. Just do it for sake of it and see what she tells you then.

[XXL]

In general it's tough to say sometimes I text something sometimes girls send some stuff. I do it very randomly usually when something funny or interesting pops up in my mind.

[Ballr]

Withholding on "good morning" txts makes sense for girls who aren't your LTR.

But texting frequencies must change per relationship status. Is it always a rule to keep the texts at a minimum? Even 6's and 7's have options in this generation. Text too often, you're clingy and needy. Text too little, you might be forgotten about along w/ her other prospects.

[General Stalin]

Don't keep up chit chat with a girl throughout the day. Keep it to funny/random shit and logistics.

Also texting good morning every morning to some girl you've seen 3 times and haven't fucked? Fuck that.

wi30's post has a lot of great advice.

[PapayaTapper]

(02-16-2017 01:41 AM)Basil II Wrote:  

How often should you be initiating contact with a girl you're steadily working towards sex with and girls that you are dating? Should you text them every day between dates?

No but this should be under "Best way ever to next a girl"...Not kidding.

[Number one bummer]

(02-16-2017 05:08 AM)Basil II Wrote:  

I'll chalk this one up to another case of girls asking for things that they actually don't want.

Nailed it. The only reason they want one is so they can attention whore it on social media and try to one up other girls. It can then be used against you later to prove your "creepiness" as she complain to her friends how you text her first everyday.

[LeoneVolpe]

Guys should look at texting early in the day with the same level of disdain they'd have for going on a "lunch date" with a woman. The odds of an early morning conversation leading to a bang are slim-to-none, much like lunch dates have abysmal bang conversion rates. A text conversation or meetup occurring once the sun goes down has a much higher probability of taking more interesting twists and turns.

The most valuable resource anyone has to give is their time. You don't want to seem "too available" to a woman by chit-chatting off and on with her all day long. You're a busy man. You have places to go and people to meet. You'll make time for her in the evening once you've taken care of business. There's a time and place for everything.

Bottom line: She needs to respect your time, and to understand there's a proper venue in which to discuss with you what, in all likelihood, will be the non-important and uninteresting things she has to say. That venue is not throughout the entire day.

[Vaun]

Ideally you want a girl checking in on you. You can tell when she starts to text you in the mornings and evenings, to see if you respond, or, if you are with someone else. I play that up for a while by not responding, then reward her(cheaply) in other ways if I know she is really thinking of me. Good sex is a good way. The ones who don't aren't thinking of you or see you as a side piece.

[questor70]

Depends on the context of the texts. I used to get this sort of thing:

"I miss you"
(at this point I freeze up, not knowing what to text back and after a couple minutes)
"OK, I get the story now."
(continue to spiral out of control)

Once a text session starts there's no established etiquette to signoff without sounding rude. You say "Sorry, I'm in a meeting. Sorry I need to get work done?" Women who have boring deskjobs with a lot of idle time are liable to try to keep a running dialogue going all through the day unless you can somehow short-circuit it. It's like she's actually there like Scarlett Johannson in Her. I, personally, do not want that dynamic. When I want a woman's company, I want it flesh and blood, not electronic.

[tapthatass]

(02-16-2017 01:41 AM)Basil II Wrote:  

How often should you be initiating contact with a girl you're steadily working towards sex with and girls that you are dating? Should you text them every day between dates?

I'm 3 dates in with a girl, she asked me to message her good morning every morning when I told her about my daily morning ritual. Sounds good that we touch base everyday but it also feels like that would send a terrible pedastalisation worship message since she's the first person I'd communicate with and think about every day. Is a daily good morning message normal practice or only for betas?

TLDR: How frequently and what time in the day are best to send messages?

Cheers

I've tried this experiment with women when I first learned game (about 3 years ago).

My experiment was pretty simple. I first use my alpha status and get her into bed. The next day, I go full beta and generally message her everyday in the morning and at night for two weeks(good morning and good night everyday).

I conducted this experiment on 10 different women
1) The rational ones (there was this scientist chick)
2) Older (35+)
3) Few party sluts
4) barely 18 chicks


You want to know the result?

Every single one of them stopped replying to my messages in less than 2 weeks. It was a 100% success. It honestly didn't matter if a woman is older, rational or a party slut. Everyone followed the same pattern.


I didn't even "act" full beta. All I did was message her everyday in the morning and at night. That's it. The relationships went downhill very quickly.

From that day, I never message a woman unless she replied first or if I need something from her. The last thing you want to do is send her messages everyday and radiate "needy" vibes.

[Griprip08]

In case you missed these.

(02-16-2017 03:06 AM)wi30 Wrote:  

Err on the side of being too distant vs. too clingy.

(02-16-2017 09:35 AM)graffix13 Wrote:  

Tell her you are too busy to text her every morning.

(02-16-2017 11:55 AM)General Stalin Wrote:  

Don't keep up chit chat with a girl throughout the day.

(02-16-2017 05:44 PM)LeoneVolpe Wrote:  

The most valuable resource anyone has to give is their time. You don't want to seem "too available" to a woman by chit-chatting off and on with her all day long. You're a busy man. You have places to go and people to meet. You'll make time for her in the evening once you've taken care of business. There's a time and place for everything.

[Cobra]

(02-17-2017 11:23 PM)tapthatass Wrote:  

(02-16-2017 01:41 AM)Basil II Wrote:  

How often should you be initiating contact with a girl you're steadily working towards sex with and girls that you are dating? Should you text them every day between dates?

I'm 3 dates in with a girl, she asked me to message her good morning every morning when I told her about my daily morning ritual. Sounds good that we touch base everyday but it also feels like that would send a terrible pedastalisation worship message since she's the first person I'd communicate with and think about every day. Is a daily good morning message normal practice or only for betas?

TLDR: How frequently and what time in the day are best to send messages?

Cheers

I've tried this experiment with women when I first learned game (about 3 years ago).

My experiment was pretty simple. I first use my alpha status and get her into bed. The next day, I go full beta and generally message her everyday in the morning and at night for two weeks(good morning and good night everyday).

I conducted this experiment on 10 different women
1) The rational ones (there was this scientist chick)
2) Older (35+)
3) Few party sluts
4) barely 18 chicks


You want to know the result?

Every single one of them stopped replying to my messages in less than 2 weeks. It was a 100% success. It honestly didn't matter if a woman is older, rational or a party slut. Everyone followed the same pattern.


I didn't even "act" full beta. All I did was message her everyday in the morning and at night. That's it. The relationships went downhill very quickly.

From that day, I never message a woman unless she replied first or if I need something from her. The last thing you want to do is send her messages everyday and radiate "needy" vibes.

While I think this advice appears to be good, I am still having a hard time envisioning your "alpha" status and your chameleon like ability to switch to "beta" based on your earlier posts where we had some disagreements.

Additionally, let me get this straight? You did an experimentation on women that you met for the sole purpose of drying them up? You must have a pretty abundant harem to pull experiments like this.

So, pardon me while I...

[tapthatass]

This cobra guy got some "shit" on me.

You didn't even read my post. Read it again. I mentioned "I've tried this experiment with women when I first learned game (about 3 years ago) " in the first line itself.

It's pretty obvious that you want to look cool and get attention by shitting on me. In the end, your "emotional attacks" aren't going anywhere because I don't get offended and shit on all your threads like you're doing right now.

Why are you acting needy and creating unnecessary drama with a "guy"online? I smell a lot of envy for some reason. Anyways, all you're doing is trying so fucking hard to frame me as a troll so that I get banned. Jesus. Aren't you getting pussy or what? Or is it because you envy your fellow Indian?

Anyways, I don't really care about your original intentions or replying to your crap but ... let me help you. Read this,especially the first point.
http://www.returnofkings.com/38407/3-bet...get-rid-of

Good luck. Hope you learn something from that article.

[Rhyme or Reason]

(02-16-2017 09:42 AM)Fortis Wrote:  

If you have to ask whether or not to message something to a girl then you shouldn't message it to her. That's always been my standard.

Jumbotron Test...works every time.

[rapaz12]

When you're initially starting out with a woman you want a relationship with, how often should you generally communicate?

I'm asking because the woman that I'm talking to now still seems to be unhappy about it. Right now, I'll send a few texts during a specific part of the day and then I won't send anything else unless she initiates. I'll also call every couple days too.

When we spoke face to face recently, she asked me if I was messing around on her or something and I said no. She then told me it just seems suspicious that I don't message her later in the day. Of course, I haven't done it because I've already talked with her earlier in the day.

I'm not sure how to handle it when she asks me about this stuff. I want to say, "I don't like to sit on my phone all day messaging and I don't want to overdo a good thing" but I don't think that'll go over well.

[questor70]

Quote:

"I don't like to sit on my phone all day messaging and I don't want to overdo a good thing" but I don't think that'll go over well.

That's the thing. Texting is a 21st century shit-test.

Women tend to have less going on in their lives other than obsessing over their boyfriends. They are also better multitaskers and they tend to have lower-intensity dayjobs. They are going to approach texting with a lack of understanding of these differences and falsely assume a lack of responsiveness as a lack of interest in her.

If she can't be made to understand the above then she's not a keeper, IMHO.

[justforfun19713]

(10-08-2017 02:40 PM)questor70 Wrote:  

Texting is a 21st century shit-test.

They are going to approach texting with a lack of understanding of these differences and falsely assume a lack of responsiveness as a lack of interest in her.

If she can't be made to understand the above then she's not a keeper, IMHO.

Bro, you f*cking nailed it right there… I like how you put that.

OP, you bring up a topic that is near and dear to my heart especially given how dependent we have all become on texting as a way to communicate in general. Like General Stalin above, I 2nd wi30’s comments in whole.

I’ll share a recent personal experience that may illustrate a few additional points that may help; Before I do, please note that: (1) I have not always been like this (these are very much learned behaviors on my part, some AFTER turning 40); (2) Delivery is everything. Learning to have a quiet and low voice can do wonders for instilling respect in your listener (woman, child, or another man).

I believe it’s important to mention those items since I regularly see new posters here on the forum receive condescending and sh*tty answers that make it seem like the responder has always been like (however they respond). I believe it is valuable to give whole and complete answers, along with a ‘bit of context.

Back to the story. So just yesterday, one of my plates got back into town from some work travel she had over the last week and a half. At one point she proceeds to lay into me about how she’s feeling very distant from me lately. We are out taking a walk (she’d been driving for 4 hours and it was a nice day). I ask her very innocently what she means, and she immediately pivots to how long it takes for me to respond to her texts, how I don’t text her every day, and how my responses are much shorter than hers.

Immediately, I am laughing inside and it was all I could do not to laugh in her face.

Mind you, for me this chick actually has LTR potential, so I’m not ‘gonna beat her up too bad, but I am dead-set on my boundaries, and I live in an area where women of the demographic I frequent (30’s to 40’s) are super easy to come by. She’s also fantastic in the sack, but of course I know she didn’t get there by reading Penthouse Letters. ?

My boundaries in this case are two-fold: (1) I despise texting women for more than logistics; (2) She’s been getting a ‘bit needy over the last few weeks and is clearly looking to lock me down faster than I am interested in.

After literally not responding to her until she prompts me with, ‘Aren’t you going to say anything,’ followed by me responding with, ‘About what?’ (I wanted to make sure she was absolutely focused on what I was going to say next). ‘Don’t play games, Justforfun, you know what I’m asking!’

I abruptly stop walking (break current state), let go of her hand (break physical contact), lower my voice (grab her attention by the proverbial throat) and say, ‘Number 1: Were you this needy with the guy you were just with for 5 years; Number 2, do you have this idea that guys are going to place you on a pedestal and chase you? I don’t do either of those.’

(Pause, 2,3,4)

(change the subject)
‘Do you want Chinese or Italian for dinner?’ (letting her know for you this is a closed topic and I have already moved on).

Admittedly, I take a ‘bit of a baseball bat approach when it comes to women’s emotions sometimes, and it sure does not work every time. She could have done one of two things in that moment: (1) walk away; (2) cry, scream, or yell at me, or slap me. In both instances, I walk and never look back.

For a variety of reasons, I find it’s super easy for me to throw that wall up. Not all guys can be as cold… I actively cultivate a cold demeanor with people in general; It’s something I should probably work on a ‘bit, but that’s a story for another time.

Fortunately for her, she selected a third route; She was quiet for a ‘bit, was clearly pissed, but within 10 minutes gently grabs my hand, gives it a squeeze, and looks up at me with one of those sweet, doe-eyed gentle smiles where you just know you own a girl.

I am sure you can guess how that story ended.

P.S. Basil II – You have some great posts and input out here… I would encourage you to reach out to a few well-repped members and go meet them in person. This forum is primarily made better through meaningful input by men who have shown not just to be true contributors on-line, but in real life.