10Feb17
We went to the shittier of our location options, and it's so much shittier I didn't even bother dressing up. I went black T, jeans, black shoes. This place is like little league compared to the city.
Despite this...
By this day, I had been reading Bang, CH and this forum, as well as posting this log and so I was in a great mindset to get out and approach.
This quote from Bang has been echoing in mind as I have always considered myself ugly and often times let it cut me so deep, I don't want to do anything:
"If you think appearance is important and you consider yourself unattractive, you've doomed yourself to sitting behind a computer. You need to have the belief that game, not appearance, is important, and then go out there and play the hand you've been dealt." - Roosh
Note: I've created this weird affirmation I tell myself a lot: "Looks don't matter, looks don't matter!" Sometimes I'll be driving and just scream it. Lol.
This quote from CH,
Inner Game, helps quite a bit, too:
"Every time you feel self-doubt and talk yourself into inaction, yell “Stop!” out loud, and your brain will reboot. You then consciously reframe your thought processes to put the burden of approval seeking on those around you. With good inner game you can say just about any ridiculous routine and the girl will be intrigued.
The most important change in thinking you can make:
You are not there to win over women, they are there to win over you."
This isn't an excuse to look like a bum. I still put in effort to look my best (especially when I go to awesome bars or clubs), but that confidence is the most important.
Approach 18: A pretty decent chick and some ugly dude were buying shots I'd never seen before. I tapped her arm and said, "Hey, what are you guys drinking?" Cinnamon toast crunch shot - it was like fireball and something else, which I learned after buying one, and regretted buying it. "Oh yeah, is it good?" Oh it's very good. She was doing all the talking. I shouted to the bartender, "Hey, can we get two more?!" Then the girl kept talking to me more, making comments about the drink. That was about it, they walked away. I saw them later in the night on the dance floor and it didn't look like he was getting anything from her.
Approach 19: We met up with our buddy again who, at this bar, knows everyone in the fucking bar always. Always. He's like a celebrity, the girls love him. Anyways, he was chilling, talking to us with a girl nearby and then he turned away for a bit to attend to his strange stardom (he's a bouncer there). So this girl is standing there and it was a bit awkward, "So how do you know ___?" She had no idea. We chatted for a bit, then he turned around and kept talking to her. I consider this an approach because it was awkward and I felt the pressure to talk to her, and pushed through it to talk to her.
Approach 20: These might be out of order. I usually jot down one or two words in my phone to remember who I approached at the end of the night. The words for this were: tank and sexy chick. Lol. There was this girl who was dancing at the bar like a savage, she bent over the bar and was shaking dat ass hard. My buddy said, she wants to be fucked. He was right and I wanted to fuck her. But then a fucking gorilla came over. A tank. A legit fucking tank. He goes, "I wanna fuck that girl, but you'd have to take the fatty." Not a chance. They turned around and came, literally, right where we were standing. There was like a one foot piece of wood between us, and then there was a barrier to rest drinks on.... The DJ put on a song and the fucking tank started screaming... raised her fucking arms or barrel or whatever that thing on a tank is that launches rockets, and it scared the shit out of me. She opened her mouth and I saw a tongue ring. Just a pig. Total pig.
"You scared the shit out of me!" Sorry, she said. I looked at her and then the friend, thought not worth it and walked away.
Approach 21: I pulled the old Roosh grind on ass and see if she's okay with it approach. I was pretty drunk. This girl wasn't hot but she was black which I love usually. We didn't even talk. I was grinding up on her and she was feeling it. Felt her up all over and then went in the pants. Wet as ever lol. Strange enough she wouldn't let me kiss her citing self control. This happened near the end of the night. Her ugly friends were like beeeeeggging me to push for more. She seemed cold. I got her number and we texted for the next two days. I saw her snapchat and decided I can do better. But god damn, I need to nut.