[el mechanico]

(09-02-2011 01:07 PM)Samseau Wrote:  

(09-02-2011 12:18 PM)LaCobra Wrote:  

Forget about her, she has a kid, man. Come on.

This is your first post, and you've been registered since Sep 2010!?

This thread was too much for you resist lurking any longer, eh?

Hillarious! I just spit some of my lunch on the monitor. He just couldn't hold out any longer I guess. A kid? naw fuck that...its time!

[wanderer]

LaCobra- good to see I popped your forum cherry, although she isnt the one with a kid, its her ex.

Samseau- your response was spot on. Yes, its clear that I've allowed emotion to get in the way of simple rationale, I need to get back to thinking like a man and not like a girl. I suppose relationships make you soft...

She's already been in contact stating she fucked up and needs to sort her life out, but I've ignored it and instead impulsively booked a trip to S.E. Asia starting this time next month. At least I have some carnage to look forward to for a month, perfect antidote to all this garbage!

[wolf]

This seriously reminds me of Solomon's blog. Every time a woman lies about some other guy she uses Solomon's words and it makes me cringe.

[Strix]

Been following Roissy's blog for a while now which brought me over here.

Reading this thread I'm interested for your input regarding my dealings with a particularly lethal blend of male crack – a potent internal ingenue of an ex-girfriend with an unusually astute grasp of human nature.

Sparing the boring details, we got together a couple of years ago following the breakup with her boyfriend of nearly four years and spent the next eight months together in a maelstrom of drama and intense sexual adventure. Nothing was off limits, until slowly but surely I drowned under the monsoon of continual shit tests. My betatude spread like an invisible cancer, slowly infecting our relationship until it unconsciously poisoned her attraction for me altogether, leaving behind a shattered, sorry excuse for a man.

Shortly after our breakup she returned into the arms (and house) of her ex, later becoming engaged. She now had him exactly where she wanted him – on the back-foot scared of losing her a second time.

Fast forward nearly a year following my discovery of game and my resultant epiphany; I am my own salvation. I am the prize. It was a beautiful thing.

With that, I took it upon myself to change whatever I wasn’t happy with. I started hitting the weights, ran my first half marathon, restarted TaeKwon-Do and took a shot at a new job which I'd always held myself back from going for; giving me a brand new BMW company car for my efforts. Friends and family commented how strong and successful I had become as a person.

Catching a whiff of my newfound character, my ex began getting back in touch, 18 months after our breakup. I had not seen her once since this time. Inviting herself over one night on the flimsy excuse to look at her "broken car" I made my availability scarce, cutting our catch-up short to go to the gym with a friend as I ousted her out my flat.

Looking surprised, she remarked she had kept her night free for me and assumed we would be getting dinner together. Smiling, I told her she had clearly got the wrong idea and wished her a good night.

From that point forward, she did not stop chasing me with progressively more outrageous flirting until I slowly began losing hand and agreeing to meet her more and more frequently, unbeknown to her fiance. Most recently, we spent most of Saturday night together, where I drove us to a viewing spot overlooking the coast in a car park late at night, full of people.

Not put off by the surrounding cars she enticed me to get physical with her, with me gradually forcing her to kiss me - the point of no return. Both in the back seat, she willingly undid my belt and teased her hands underneath my boxers, just close enough to avoid contact. Likewise, while not resisting my move to undo her jeans, numerous attempts to push further were gently refrained.

Clearly very horny, she would whisper that she wanted me, but couldn't and would always stop herself at the last possible moment. After driving us home I then didn't hear from her in two days, receiving an alpha-like text on Monday evening, to which I have not replied. By Tuesday lunchtime she emailed me asking where I had disappeared to. Once again, I have refrained from any contact and avoided any online updates that reveal my whereabouts.

As noted earlier in this thread, silence = death for ingenues. She hates to be ignored, and amusingly insists that games do not work on her.

My question is, where do I go from here. I hate that she has got a hold on me again when I worked so hard to become stronger as a person after our breakup, proving that my inner game still needs work. My close friends all remark how she isn't any good for me, yet the thrill of the chase keeps me enthralled and as an ENFP she has a deep intuition that enables her to establish an intensely strong connection with me. (Notice also the reference to ingenue in this forum post: _ttp://intjforum.com/showthread.php?t=53274&page=2)

When we are together she shows occasional flashes of deep sincerity which she then masks with aloof game. Deep down she knows what she is like and that it isn't healthy, but can't seem to stop herself putting up these bullshit parades to throw people off the scent. She is troubled and is scared of being judged.

From my point of view I can either continue with the games to regain hand, but don't see where this gets us in the long run. I don't want her consuming my thoughts like this for fear of it destroying me once again - something my friends can see and warn me of.

Do I simply walk away and refocus my energy elsewhere for distraction, or should I calmly call her out on her bullshit the next time we meet - informing her that I won't continue tolerating her games, which don't work on me anymore, turning my back if she cries out in indignation.

I can't decide whether it's necessary to breach the first rule of fight club in order to lay down the law and make her realise if she continues the way she is she'll end up losing me altogether. If only she would drop the bullshit...