[lowside]

So I went out this saturday and joined a group of 2 good (male) friends, and 5 girls who I didn't know. Basically social circle.

I sat next to a girl (a 6, maybe 7 on her best day), whom I talked to casually throughout the night. She laughed at my shitty jokes. Wasn't really gaming her to be honest, didn't expect anything from it. I interacted more with my friends, because I hadn't seen them in quite a while.

Towards the end of the night, I ask for her instagram. She gave her instagram and I added her. Probably should have gone for the number, but figured this would be less direct. From what I could see quickly she didn't have many followers (sub 100), but did have a lot of pictures. Furthermore, she probably had a kid, which I'm fine with. When I looked again the next day I could tell she did a little cleaning up, as she had much less pictures and the kid wasn't there any longer.

Anyway, I had to go. So I got up and greeted her, told her I needed to go. Then she says: I hope we see each other again. That's when it hit me that she's actually interested and I probably should have gone for the number. I replied: I'll contact you on instagram. She smiled and knodded.

I let it cool down for a couple of days. Fast forward to last night, I message her through instagram: hey whats up. After that nothing but silence.

I was pretty confident I had this one in the bag. Where did I mess up?

[Windom Earle]

Has it been 24hrs since the message?

[lowside]

(10-20-2016 03:12 AM)Windom Earle Wrote:  

Has it been 24hrs since the message?

No

[Windom Earle]

Wait until then. Do not send her another message in the interim.

[lowside]

Ok, thank you. Will report back.

[XPQ22]

(10-20-2016 02:25 AM)lowside Wrote:  

I let it cool down for a couple of days. Fast forward to last night, I message her through instagram: hey whats up. After that nothing but silence.

I was pretty confident I had this one in the bag. Where did I mess up?

I'll leave the comment I often leave on posts like this - who knows, man. Possibly nothing.

There was one time I thought I had one "in the bag" and she was texting me enthusiastically throughout the couple days before our scheduled date, until she suddenly says something like "oh, I just found out my mom's friend committed suicide. I gotta take care of stuff" and ghosted, never to be heard from again.

Keep in mind that this was a person I spent the better part of an evening hanging with, not just some rando from Tinder I'd never met.

Quote:

Then she says: I hope we see each other again. That's when it hit me that she's actually interested and I probably should have gone for the number.

I hate to be cynical, but how do you know? Girls will say all sorts of things. She didn't leave with you. She didn't offer her contact info proactively or even say something like "we should stay in touch." She gave you some BS social media account, Instagram of all places, which it sounds like you had to grind out of her. You admit your jokes were shitty and you weren't really trying to make a connection. She don't sound too interested to me. What do you expect.

I think the biggest mistake here is asking for a social media account. Do they still use phone numbers in Europe, or has every girl transitioned to some kind of setup where the only way to even talk to her at all electronically is request for Her Majesty to add you to some orbiter-app? Shit, that's the way it's headed, isn't it.

I've never had a girl offer me her Instagram account in the real world in lieu of a phone number. If that ever happens I'll probably find it so amusing that I won't be able to help laughing.

But if you never hear from her again I would say the lesson here should be - if you want to get with young white Western girls as I imagine this one was, even one who's "barely a 7" on a good day, you have to run tight game. Throwing a few conversational tidbits and bad jokes her way while you mostly ignore her to shoot the breeze with your buddies, and expecting her to be falling all over your dick to set up the day 2 doesn't seem very realistic.

[torridon747]

(10-20-2016 02:25 AM)lowside Wrote:  

So I went out this saturday and joined a group of 2 good (male) friends, and 5 girls who I didn't know. Basically social circle.

I sat next to a girl (a 6, maybe 7 on her best day), whom I talked to casually throughout the night. She laughed at my shitty jokes. Wasn't really gaming her to be honest, didn't expect anything from it. I interacted more with my friends, because I hadn't seen them in quite a while.

Towards the end of the night, I ask for her instagram. She gave her instagram and I added her. Probably should have gone for the number, but figured this would be less direct. From what I could see quickly she didn't have many followers (sub 100), but did have a lot of pictures. Furthermore, she probably had a kid, which I'm fine with. When I looked again the next day I could tell she did a little cleaning up, as she had much less pictures and the kid wasn't there any longer.

Anyway, I had to go. So I got up and greeted her, told her I needed to go. Then she says: I hope we see each other again. That's when it hit me that she's actually interested and I probably should have gone for the number. I replied: I'll contact you on instagram. She smiled and knodded.

I let it cool down for a couple of days. Fast forward to last night, I message her through instagram: hey whats up. After that nothing but silence.

I was pretty confident I had this one in the bag. Where did I mess up?

She might be on the lookout for followers. "I'll contact you on instagram" isn't something a man should say with very few exceptions.

You should've got her number but it sounds like you know that now, it would've given you an indication if she was actually interested instead of you having to play this guessing game.

Don't stress it, move on. I would give it more than 24 hours personally but at least do yourself the favor and do not message her more than twice.

[lowside]

I think you guys are right. Come to think of it, it was me who was initiating conversation every time. She didn't ask my age, where I'm from or anything personal at all. I didn't either. It was just regular conversation about nothing really.

I was not planning on messaging her again. I know I will be seeing her again since it's social circle. I'll probably just ignore her.

[Euphoria]

1 - Having decent conversation with girl never means she is in the bag.
2- She will act nice, receptive in order to expand her orbiters.
3- She has a kid. This means you have nothing to lose, except a bang.
4- Never wait 24h to figure out she ignored your text. Girls checking their facebook, tinder, twittier, instagram, whatsapp every five minutes. If she doesnt reply in 1 hour, its gone.

Next her.

[XPQ22]

(10-20-2016 04:44 AM)lowside Wrote:  

I was not planning on messaging her again. I know I will be seeing her again since it's social circle. I'll probably just ignore her.

Well, I wouldn't swing too hard in the opposite direction, either. If you're looking to run social circle game, it's best to get a reputation as a chill guy who isn't fazed by women's general flakey, unpredictable nature.

There are areas of grey between "She wants the D right now" and "She didn't respond to one text message, she thinks I'm the worst I'll never have a shot." Who knows what her situation really is? And that's part of what good game is about, I think - you have to get a sense of what her needs are...you can't assume they're just sitting around hoping you'll put your bid in. It's hard to get that going in casual.

There are times I've encountered girls in my (admittedly small) extended social circle who I texted and didn't reply, or were ambivalent and went cold. I don't even bring it up, just play it to the left as if it's the least unusual thing in the world. To their mind, it is. I'm hitting up and banging other girls, so what does it matter?

Remember that only texting her once and then fucking off if she doesn't reply likely sets you apart from perhaps 80% of the other guys she meets right out of the gate. There is much thirst.

[Rhyme or Reason]

(10-20-2016 04:53 AM)Euphoria Wrote:  

1 - Having decent conversation with girl never means she is in the bag.
2- She will act nice, receptive in order to expand her orbiters.
3- She has a kid. This means you have nothing to lose, except a bang.
4- Never wait 24h to figure out she ignored your text. Girls checking their facebook, tinder, twittier, instagram, whatsapp every five minutes. If she doesnt reply in 1 hour, its gone.

Next her.

Yeah it's ridiculous that we're supposed to believe (yet some guys do) that they didn't see the text or whatever. As if we don't see them glued to their phones 24 hours a day? This is why I only reciprocate interest, I never offer it unless it's in the form of letting her know I want to bang right then and there.

(10-20-2016 10:10 AM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

Well, I wouldn't swing too hard in the opposite direction, either. If you're looking to run social circle game, it's best to get a reputation as a chill guy who isn't fazed by women's general flakey, unpredictable nature.

I'm assuming the OP is college aged. Social Circle Game seems to be more effective the younger you are. I'd agree that you will get further in that context by earning the respect of the males of the group rather than hitting up the broads that are there because it's expedient. If you can place yourself above the other guys somehow or command their respect their associated bitches will make themselves available to you and not the other way around.

Also, when you go out with a mixed group, branch off when you get to the venue. Don't orbit, don't hover, don't stick to the group and only talk to the girls you came with. It comes off as needy and pathetic, like you lack the balls to approach. So mix it up and go hit on other girls, the girls you came with will take note. Preselection is one of the most powerful weapons in your pooah arsenal.

[lowside]

I'm a couple of years past college age. Girl is about 24. This was in a laid back club/lounge setting. Definitely not college social circle. Girl is from SE Europe. I dressed tight. My game as some of you mentioned wasn't so tight as I didn't even try to game her.

Still no response. Let's be honest, she saw my message the second I sent it, Euphoria is right. Could be a million reasons. Maybe she simply wasn't interested. Maybe she saw I only have girls in my instagram follower list and thought I was a player. Maybe I initiated too soon, maybe too late. Who the fuck knows.

I'm just going to look for other endeavors (which I should be doing anyway) and leave this as is.

[Carmichael Reid]

(10-21-2016 07:06 AM)lowside Wrote:  

I'm a couple of years past college age. Girl is about 24. This was in a laid back club/lounge setting. Definitely not college social circle. Girl is from SE Europe. I dressed tight. My game as some of you mentioned wasn't so tight as I didn't even try to game her.

Still no response. Let's be honest, she saw my message the second I sent it, Euphoria is right. Could be a million reasons. Maybe she simply wasn't interested. Maybe she saw I only have girls in my instagram follower list and thought I was a player. Maybe I initiated too soon, maybe too late. Who the fuck knows.

I'm just going to look for other endeavors (which I should be doing anyway) and leave this as is.

She's 24. Everyone is trying to fuck her.

Next time this happens to you. Ask yourself, what is going on your life, where you actually give a flying shit if she texts you back or not...Move on...
The one who cares the least wins. She probably doesn't even know your name or would recognize you... If guys became aloof as much as women are. There would be alot more productivity in the world.

[Euphoria]

(10-21-2016 07:06 AM)lowside Wrote:  

Maybe she saw I only have girls in my instagram follower list and thought I was a player. Maybe I initiated too soon, maybe too late. Who the fuck knows.

I dont understand where guys getting this idea from. Women loves players. They instantly joining competition. Not because they want that man for themselves, but they wants to prove themselves to other girls that she is better than them. One must understand, women are controlled by their emotions and instincts. They will follow fashion mindlessly. Do you think there is single woman out there that not chasing Dan Bilzerian just because he is player? You must understand women have no sense of logic.

[Mjölnir]

(10-20-2016 02:25 AM)lowside Wrote:  

I was pretty confident I had this one in the bag. Where did I mess up?

Never assume a girl is invested in you and you have it in the bag unless you've banged her.

Maybe you didn't mess up, there could be a million factors on why she didn't respond to you. I've had a similiar scenario couple months back.

I went out to a party and there was a chick whos friend of mine there with a bunch of other girls i knew trough her, I notice that a cute 8+ I got along when we met before was there and giving me the eye. Me and my wingman roll to find some girls and I get massively drunk and high.

Fastfoward half an hour later and I run into them again, she imediately comes to me and says that she bet with the other girls she would kiss me if i showed up again. We do some heavy making out on the dance floor, I bounce get some other chicks, come back to her, repeat...

We get in a bus together and she's all over me, grabbing my arms, my chest. Even tellling me i'm pretty hot, and she's taking advantage of me because i wouldn't remember that the other day, we make out again, at this point i'm almost blacking out. We get to the bus stop and the 5 girls get a cab, they live pretty far from me and there is no way I fit in that taxi.

I'm giving a kiss goodbye to the girls while they get in the car, she comes last and we makeout again.

So, you'd think I got it in the bag right ? Nope.

Couple days later we have a fun convo via text, she says i'm a smart ass when i'm not wasted and that she's interested blabla, I try to set up a meet and she is going to travel the other day, and don't offer to reschedule..

When she comes back I give it another try but she says she's really focusing on her studies right now etc, but I should hang out with all them girls anytime.

NEXT. Charge it to the game man, at the end of the day, you NEED numbers game.

Ha, funny addition, the girl that introduced me to her commented on a picture of me saying something about this chick. I send my friend a picture out of the shower only wearing my towel, saying: what does she think of this one ?

So not my friend answers me, but the chick I hooked up telling me that she likes it and that i should send one without the towel, I told her it would ruin the mystery, and she tell's me: when are we going to end it ?

I probably could convert it, but I let my ego take over and tell her: Who said we are going to end it ? The convo went along for some more phrases and it endend well. But whatever, shes proved me that shes a flake before, what would be different now ?

I think the more girls you have on your rotation the less you'll give a fuck about a chick not answering you, that should be your goal.

Not worrying about some broad you've had casual banter answering you on instagram.