[MilkSteak]

I’m fairly new to TRP and game in general and I feel like I’ve gone in too deep and need some advice.
A few months ago I pipelined Jakarta, went over there and had a ball. I banged this particular plate twice and each time I’d meet her and bang her, we’d part ways almost immediately after. In some pillow talk I asked what her salary was and she replied $230USD/month… standard Indonesian wage.

Since I returned home she sends messages to me every now and then and I reply to keep her around for future visits to Jakarta. At one point I blatantly tell her “we aren’t dating” and she’s fine with that, I don’t want to lead her on.

About a month ago she tells me that she wants to come and visit me. I tell her it’s more worthwhile to get a working visa so she can earn some money and go back to Indonesia better than how she left. She needs to complete her undergrad degree before she can apply for a working visa here… which is next year.
She tells me she wants to visit in October for 5 days because it’s a bit hard to get a lot of time off work.

I told her it’s very expensive to come just to see me and she told me:
“Yes indeed, its expensive to me. I don't know what I am feeling, just wanna meet you again.
I know I am thinking about work there too, but not in near time”


My issue with it is that she’ll spend 2 months salary on a return ticket here to visit someone that doesn’t want to date her.
What’s good about it is that she’ll get to practice English and she’ll have me to show her the tourist sites whilst she’s here.
She’ll ultimately go back to Indonesia with no savings and crushed expectations.


My options as I see it:
Let her come. It’s her life and she can make her own mistakes.
Refuse to let her come. It’s for her own good.

Does anyone have any advice?

[Conscious Pirate]

This OP should probably be in the game forum, but you have cast a wide net in the meantime.

While maybe new to TRP as a concept, it seems you are underestimating your intelligence & understanding of the world. Your instincts are dead on.

Quote:

My issue with it is that she’ll spend 2 months salary on a return ticket here to visit someone that doesn’t want to date her.
What’s good about it is that she’ll get to practice English and she’ll have me to show her the tourist sites whilst she’s here.
She’ll ultimately go back to Indonesia with no savings and crushed expectations.

Whats good about this for you, short or long term?

Quote:

My options as I see it:
Let her come. It’s her life and she can make her own mistakes.

Yep, sure. And a good way to justify an easy-come bang week with minimal perceived outlay (I've been there too)...

Just don't let her get her claws in you, or you get your boys in her.

[The Beast1]

Better served in the game newbies section.

I'd say don't let her come. If you don't want to date her, it's unfair to lead a her on. She sees you as her escape from her home. She'd probably do all of the nice lady things during that two week excursion to get you to think about bringing her back long term.

You should instead take a longer trip to Indonesia and have her show you around. Get a feel for her and see if you would be interested in dating and longer term stuff. Month long excursion would be ideal, a fully remote gig would be the most ideal as you can size her up for the long term (if that's what you want).

[Speculation]

I'd feel awkward about the situation because I know the week would end in crushed hopes and an awkward conversation. I wouldn't enjoy the week as much knowing that the conversation was coming and she'd probably pick up on that.

You could hedge your bets by telling her exactly how the week would go down and how it would end before she even bought the ticket so she could make her mind up. It would be all good as long as you were completely on the same page. I actually did this with a girl from Peru several years ago. I always knew she wanted more, but I had to be ruthless in making sure she knew about my boundaries so I didn't get entangled in drama and bad feelings.

[kinjutsu]

If you really think fucking her exclusively for a few days is something you want to do with your life right, then go ahead and invite her.
I'm guessing it all depends on how "hot" she is to you.
Do you want to rip off her clothes immediately whenever you see her?
Is she just barely a "would bang"?


Personally i wouldn't want her to spend so much money on a trip to visit me.

I was in a similar situation with a korean girl i dated for a few months before her working visa expired. Later in the year she wanted to visit me over my xmas break at work. The ticket would've been around $1,400 CDN. She would've stayed at my place and fucked the whole time.
Pretty girl, amazingly nice person as well.
Still at the end of the day i told her not to come and save her money.
I didn't plan on having a long distance relationship with her. No point in leading her on.
Some guys may think I'm beta for this but I'd rather not have it weighing on my conscience when i go to sleep at night.

[Goldin Boy]

Your two options seem really focused on what's good for HER. She's just a plate, not your wife or girlfriend, why are so worried?

What about YOU? What do you want?

I'd let her do it(unless I had shit to do that week). She wants to blow her money so she can live at your house and get fucked silly by you with no commitment and you're hemming and hawing about it? That's a win-win situation to me.

Just flush the condoms when you're done.

[MilkSteak]

Some interesting replies. Thanks for the insight.

I'll clarify that she is extremely genetically gifted in terms of body. Level of thinking/understanding of the world is the same as most Indonesians, quite limited and close-minded (personal opinion).
I do not see her as anyone I'll spend any exclusive time with, she's merely a plate. If I were to go back to Jakarta, I would do the exact same thing as I did before, pipeline and tear it up.

I'm glad the point of her trying to lock me in was stressed; it would mean checkmate for her. Definitely something I need to be aware of anytime I see her (or anyone for that matter).

The short term benefits for me are the having a guaranteed bang every night whilst she's here and being able to enjoy touristy things with someone else (not that I can't do it alone).
Long term is keeping a plate interested for future meet-ups.

Absolutely conscience is a huge factor here and I think one of the points it boils down to is her intent on visiting me. We've had that conversation a few times and she told me it's not only for me, but she wants to practice English and see the world. She may have a hidden intent to reel me in or she could be genuine, best to play it safe and have my guard up.

My outlook on life is to master game and actually be confident in myself. I know plenty of people that cop-out on this goal once they get reeled into a relationship; I like to think I'm stronger/better than that.
Letting her come for a week only really suits a short-term desire for sex, not my long-term goals.

[nomadbrah]

She will probably run off to relatives or friends once she gets the Visa and you'll be stuck dealing with immigration.

[Sephiroth]

No pussy is worth drama. She's young, possibly inexperienced, and infatuated with the smooth foreigner (you). Being Australian (and I assume white) is a jackpot in her mind for what her imagined future now potentially holds.

You, however, obviously don't share her feelings, so you know it's going to be a week of you trying to let her down, knowing she spent a lot of money to get there, because - like all women - she thinks she can change your mind.

Don't fall for it. Her coming and depending on you for a week will be stressful for you, so it's best to cut this off now and focus on your other goals.

[BoiBoi]

I'm in very similar situation. Met a chick off Couchsurfing and we had some good chemnistry. She continued her trip and eventually changed her schedule in order to spend more time in my city. She is flying in tomorrow and will spend about 3 weeks in my city.

I didn't think twice when she wanted my opinion on her plans to spend several weeks at my flat. A sexy chick you enjoy banging comes to visit you on her dime. What's not to like?

Edit: My chick is from the US and her family is rich, so your case might be different.

[El Chinito loco]

(07-21-2016 03:26 AM)MilkSteak Wrote:  

I’m fairly new to TRP and game in general and I feel like I’ve gone in too deep and need some advice.
A few months ago I pipelined Jakarta, went over there and had a ball. I banged this particular plate twice and each time I’d meet her and bang her, we’d part ways almost immediately after. In some pillow talk I asked what her salary was and she replied $230USD/month… standard Indonesian wage.

Why would you ask about salary or any other concerns? $230 is low for even Indonesia.

Quote:

Since I returned home she sends messages to me every now and then and I reply to keep her around for future visits to Jakarta. At one point I blatantly tell her “we aren’t dating” and she’s fine with that, I don’t want to lead her on.

Indonesian women generally don't message you over and over again like this. They are not insistent at all most of the time. They understand discrete relations there like most SEA nations. They get possessive not in this way. So...bullshit..

Quote:

About a month ago she tells me that she wants to come and visit me. I tell her it’s more worthwhile to get a working visa so she can earn some money and go back to Indonesia better than how she left. She needs to complete her undergrad degree before she can apply for a working visa here… which is next year.
She tells me she wants to visit in October for 5 days because it’s a bit hard to get a lot of time off work.

A girl who supposedly makes <$300 dollars net a month has lofty dreams of visiting a foreign land and isn't beholden to family obligations or other responsibilities? Ok.

Quote:

I told her it’s very expensive to come just to see me and she told me:
“Yes indeed, its expensive to me. I don't know what I am feeling, just wanna meet you again.
I know I am thinking about work there too, but not in near time”

Loves imaginary gringo cock so much so you want to see hypothetically what a forum of "shitlords" would say about this politically incorrect scenario..

Quote:

My issue with it is that she’ll spend 2 months salary on a return ticket here to visit someone that doesn’t want to date her.
What’s good about it is that she’ll get to practice English and she’ll have me to show her the tourist sites whilst she’s here.
She’ll ultimately go back to Indonesia with no savings and crushed expectations.

Quote:

My options as I see it:
Let her come. It’s her life and she can make her own mistakes.
Refuse to let her come. It’s for her own good.

Does anyone have any advice?

My conclusion:

You're a white lesbian feminist so I think you should have sex with other fat white lesbian feminists.

If you're wealthy enough you might even adopt a black baby or two.

[Organicman]

The more time you are with a girl, the more you will rip her guts out! If she is a nice girl, it's best to be honest and if she starts to fall madly in love with you, cut it otherwise it will hurt her x10.

Whenever i'm with a good girl that i don't want anything serious and i tell her that, once she says the L word or falls deep in love with me, I tell her it's best we be friends and I tell her i'm leaving to go overseas (lie)! Another good way to break up is to say that you ex contacted you and that you need to work out your feelings with her first before you can start a new relationship!

Personally, I always dump casual girls once they fall in love with me (1+ weeks) cause every day after the 'fallen in love' phase, it means it will hurt her compare to before she will get over easily.

Remember the equation, it takes half the time of the relationship to get over a person so if you fuck her around for 6 months, she will be hurt for 2-3 months!

Western women I don't give a fuck about, none of them are good girls! Hoes should be treated like hoes and dumped whenever you feel like it (western women)!

[El Chinito loco]

(07-21-2016 08:58 AM)Organicman Wrote:  

The more time you are with a girl, the more you will rip her guts out! If she is a nice girl, it's best to be honest and if she starts to fall madly in love with her, you have to cut it otherwise it will hurt her x10.

Whenever i'm with a good girl that i don't want anything serious and i tell her, once she says the L word or falls deep in love with me, I tell her it's best we be friends and I tell her i'm leaving to go overseas (lie).

Remember the equation, it takes half the time of the relationship to get over a person so if you fuck her around for 6 months, she will be hurt for 2-3 months!

Western women I don't give a fuck about, none of them are good girls! Hoes should be treated like hoes and dumped whenever you feel like it!

Two for one ban scenario.

[polar]

(07-21-2016 09:04 AM)El Chinito loco Wrote:  

Two for one ban scenario.

I'd give OP the benefit of a doubt. Naive, yes ; malicious, no.

OP, I'd expect her to hit you up for the cost of the ticket and accommodations once she gets here. Immigration angle is also real. On the off chance that she'd even be let into the country (as she's an overstay risk), don't even think of being her trip sponsor.

Work on yourself, your game, and find pussy closer to home. If you had a girl or two on the side right now, you wouldn't take her seriously.

Organic, you should set your frame right from the beginning (i.e. as a sexy fling, not boyfriend) so you don't have that problem of having to drop girls hard.

[Cumulonimbus]

OP, the effort won't be worth the hassle. Even if you were looking for a LTR (which I would assume is her intention, bc she can fuck any local guy she wants), that would have been the wrong way to do it. Women are social climbers, but not through their effort, they look for someone else do all the work which in most cases is men. Maybe you're are the best chance she gets at it and her coming to visit you is her investment seed capital compared to what she's going to get if she succeeds on her true intentions, most likely immigration, locking you up or similar. Don't fall for the trap!

As polar said, you gotta have options. If you keep working on your game and have few other plates spinning then dropping one won't be the end of the world. You wouldn't even remotely think about having her over.

Don't let it happen, cut her off, end it! It's actually going to motivate you to go hunting for new options!

[RatInTheWoods]

Work on getting laid in your own postcode and stop breaking poor village girls hearts.

[MilkSteak]

Thanks for the replies, I'll pull the fade to black with her. I'd rather not be reeled in by the ulterior motive that she probably has.

[Svoboda]

If she can get the visa and flight without your help, go ahead.

[Pornopung]

After recently letting a sexy, caring, kinky Polish girl (with solid income) visit me a week I say don't do it. Although we were just having fun initially the week ended in a lot of tears when I reminded her I don't want anything serious, with a poor SEA girl it would be ten times worse.

[BlackFriar]

If she comes on her own dime.....pump and dump. Then repeat....