[kaotic]

I gotta partially agree with Samseau here - when we think about a connection with girls it's not the same as they see it with us.

Sure we can get along with them, have a great time, great sex. But is that really a connection ? Or just attraction ?

I used think a connection was loving a girl, then I realized it was more than that, she's gotta compliment your life, make it easier.

I have a hard time connecting with people, not sure if I'm just closed off, or I just don't care too.


The closest a girl has gotten to me was my recent ex LTR. The ex before that was what I thought was "loooove" which obviously was infatuating pussy on a pedestal.

I doubt I'll "connect" with a girl anytime soon. Lately I haven't been making any effort to hangout with friends much, I burned myself out being social for a bit.

I do agree with Sam, men indeed understand men, women never will, and we'll never understand everything about them.

In fact, that might not be a bad thing.

[Anabasis to Desta]

(01-02-2016 08:01 PM)Samseau Wrote:  

Geez, thinking about this, I don't think I've ever really "connected" with any girl I've banged. Never have understood any female, and I seriously doubt I ever will. I can understand them as a sex, but as people they are both painfully cookie cutter boring yet instructable with their moods.

I only care if the girl feels a connection with me; what I feel towards the girl is irrelevant as the #1 reason I'm there is because she's attractive. If she actually turns out to be a good person, it's a plus as relationship material but I have never felt "connected" with any girl, like she understands me. Only men can understand men.

This.

It's important to ask ourselves ... if the girls we are banging or dating were men, would we hang out with them? In my case, 95% of the time the answer is no. None are funny. Very few have anything interesting to say. Some are cool & loving enough to enjoy other activities with post-bang but it's wishful thinking for us to expect them to understand us like we want to be understood. And i doubt we'll ever understand them like they want to either.

The above quandary triples if you're of the more intellectual variety with an above average IQ like most guys on this forum. Hard to find a girl you don't have to dumb yourself down for.

[Distant Light]

Hard to really guage because MOST people I connect with easily. Over the years I became very intuitive as people always point out some chrasmatic-like comment about me...

Thing is I am someone who loves humans BUT never one to be serious about anything, so essentially OPEN TO ALL...

One thing is for sure, if I dislike someone then THEY ARE OFF BIGTIME because it's very rare for me to do and when I do it's usually "on point"

[Laner]

If by connection you mean to connect with them in regards to world views, hobbies, business management, etc, then almost zero. Maybe 5%.

If by connection you mean is there are a moment when I feel a spark of masculine/feminine mutual attraction then I probably connect with 85%.

And for the record, I do not do much at all for online game. I spam tinder in Asia a bit is all in case of a flake or boredom. So when I approach a woman, it is because I have already read her to some degree. The way she dresses, the way she walks if its just a random approach, or if in social circle then the way she talks and treats those around her. I already know most of the time if I am going to connect with them before I have sex with them.

I have never looked towards women to replace men in my life. I grew up under the impression that women were to be the reflection of my masculinity. In the same way that I hold my female friends to logic and larger thinking, they hold me to understand the softer ways, the caring and compassion and the way of giving without hoping for something in return.