Quote: (12-21-2015 05:18 PM)XPQ22 Wrote:
"I was recently the victim of such a woman in a club. She was quite pretty and petite so I approached her with a standard opener. I moved her to a quieter room so I could entertain her like the professional clown that I am. To rule out her being a “shy” girl, I did my jig for a little longer than necessary, but after getting strong red lights to further escalation steps, I had to withdraw."
You're not really giving us a whole lot of information about the scene.
- dance club? martini lounge? loud sports bar?
- was it packed, or was it thin?
- how were you dressed, how was she dressed
- what kind of reaction did you get
The positive is it that you opened her and she complied when you moved.
But I personally don't like describing game as "clown" anything. If you're entertaining her by telling stories and jokes, you're setting yourself up to be judged by her.
Are you funny enough?
Are you entertaining?
Does funny and entertaining make HER pussy wet?
It does for some girls, it doesn't for others.
And then if you are doing that sort of game, you're depending on getting the go ahead, getting good signals to continue.
With that mentality, it's easy for her to get bored and then send you bad "signals"
What I don't see here is whether she engaged YOU?
If you crack a joke, did she just laugh, or did she try to seek rapport with you?
It almost sounds like the conversation wasn't open.
Scenario 2...
Quote: (12-21-2015 05:18 PM)XPQ22 Wrote:
The other night at a bar, I was chatting with an attractive young woman outside smoking a cigarette. But...she liked talking about snowboarding. A lot. A subject which I know desperately little about.
Eventually, however, we went inside and I had a drink with her, and she started asking a few questions about me ("sooo, what do you do?"), but her interaction still seemed fairly self-centered. Her friends soon came around to bug her to head out to another place, and I thought my chances of grabbing her number weren't that great, but I gave it a shot anyway and was rebuffed.
However, if her pals hadn't wanted to leave, I'm certain she would have let me chat with her for an hour or more if I hadn't either moved on or attempted to escalate.
What strong "red lights" should I look for?
So it's good that you got her to move.
I don't know if the drink was a good move or not, it could go either way.
It's good that she asked about you.
You didn't tell us what you said to her or how she reacted to you.
And then when the friend comes along, rather than engage the friend, you just went for the #.
The way this reads is that you were just keeping her company while her friend was about to show up.
.........................
I don't know what school of game you've learned, but it doesn't seem to me that you have
1) Your own philosophy about game
2) An overall strategy about how you want to bed women, who you want to be
3) A conversational game plan to get
- laughs i.e. control over her emotions through your language
- compliance
So for the things that you've said, I can't actually answer your question - because to me, it doesn't seem like you're running proper game. Seems like you're winging it and don't know what you want to do next.
To answer your question, when to pull out, let's just go back to a simple model
1) see a girl
2) walk over
3) get her attention
4) deliver your opener
....
5) when she finally opens, you get her logistics.
- in scenario 2, "hey who you wit, where you been, where you do you live - the typical getting to know you type question". It could be something like, "You must be one of those west side girls, I heard they're trouble"
6) Then you do your "material" whatever it is.
7) get compliance by asking her to move around, to engage
8) you're looking for her willing participation.
Now Red Flags/Red Lights..
A red light is either
- no rapport
- no compliance
- inattention
BUT, you'll never really know if she's feeling you, until you put her to the question.
So If she's generally doing what you want, moving around, twirling, reacting...but not being pro-active.
Assume that she's attracted because she
- she is complying with you
- she hasn't left, and she's been free to go.
But if she's not doing what you want, non compliance....
Most girls that aren't feeling you, will check their phones, turn their heads away, basically not pay attention.
So that's a clear indication that your rap is failing,
for now.
This is where you have to use your experience.
Do I cut and run if she's giving me bad body language?
1) Yes, if this is a bar or venue you don't go to often. And if it's a one off, or an infrequent, ALWAYS ASK THE BUYING QUESTION.
- hey I know a cooler place, let's go (instadate)
- Hey lemme get your number (number close)
2) No, if it's a bar I go to a lot.
I know I'm going to see this chick again, and we're going to talk again. Provided I wasn't too obnoxious, the next chat will be better because of
false familiarity. She thinks she knows me, and girls prefer to bang guys that they "know". Plus if you're a personable person, when you bounce off of her, and she sees you interact with other folks, you can play that to your advantage.
3) If she's a regular and I'm a regular and I go for it and bomb - It doesn't matter, because that girl might be feeling you later on. Dated this unicorn from Monterrey like that. Rejected 2wice, in bed with her the 3rd time. Happens way more often than you think.
So to recap
1) You need a plan
2) If the plan doesn't go the way you want, and you're getting bad body language
- if it's not your home turf, ask the buying question and bounce
- on your home turf, just bounce, and be like "til" we meet again
- on your turf, asking the buying question and bomb, hit her up again when you see her again.
WIA
