[MikeS]

(11-17-2015 05:47 PM)AneroidOcean Wrote:  

(11-17-2015 12:03 PM)MikeS Wrote:  

I still don't get it. Well, I get that some women have an attraction to low IQ, poorly educated men - because they on average tend to be more traditionally masculine than a stereotypical bookworm (but there's quite a wide range on the scale from caveman to nutty professor), but even without the auto correction/completion of modern communication devices, I can at most understand using abbreviations for some words.
Actual bad grammar or misspellings are still going to take more effort than writing correctly for anyone of above average intelligence and at least nine years in school.

...

You can only understand "at most" using abbreviations for some words.

You can't understand that men who have time/attention that is HIGHLY in demand would use lots of abbreviations, very minimal punctuation, and sparse response rate? This happens all the time with internal communications in the corporate world...

Misspellings and bad grammar (which as I mentioned didn't actually seem to be what HankMoody was actually using after all) are quite different from brief and sparse communication.

And yes, I guess some people do live lives where spending five or ten seconds extra on correcting a typo or two is a big deal.
But I still don't think leaving those in would be a problem either - my main issue was with direct or indirect suggestions that deliberately making yourself look either dumber or lazier or both is something that ought to be a favoured approach in texting, regardless of whether it works or not.

But regardless, as it turned out in some of the specific texting examples in this thread that wasn't really the case anyway. When I wrote particularly my original post I also had some other blog posts and past debates in mind on this topic.

[Vaun]

Hank - I give you props man. I tried your routine and I had at least one girl say "you just dont know how thrilled I am that you haven't used an emoji" You may be on to something here.

[AneroidOcean]

(11-18-2015 12:54 PM)MikeS Wrote:  

Misspellings and bad grammar (which as I mentioned didn't actually seem to be what HankMoody was actually using after all) are quite different from brief and sparse communication.

And yes, I guess some people do live lives where spending five or ten seconds extra on correcting a typo or two is a big deal.
But I still don't think leaving those in would be a problem either - my main issue was with direct or indirect suggestions that deliberately making yourself look either dumber or lazier or both is something that ought to be a favoured approach in texting, regardless of whether it works or not.

But regardless, as it turned out in some of the specific texting examples in this thread that wasn't really the case anyway. When I wrote particularly my original post I also had some other blog posts and past debates in mind on this topic.

People adjust their communication all the time depending on their audience.

This is no different.

It's actually quite freeing to not waste effort/time correcting spelling/grammar in texting. Texting is already an inefficient method of communication, with certain advantages to offset the inefficiency. You assume again that not using correct spelling/grammar all the time is a direct reflection of someone's intelligence or motivation. It's really important to understand that this is not necessarily true.

[Raccoonpaw]

I am curious, once you get her number, do you continue texting her here and there? I ask this because I got this chick's number today on OKC, we had some exchanges here and there but I kind of feel texting too much before you meet her IRL ruins the conversation aspect of things since we would have talked about everything during our exchange. I basically told her "We should give our fingers a break and give our vocal cords some exercise instead. So let's meet later."

We couldn't meet today, so we're meeting Sunday and yeah I did get her phone number to confirm the plans. So should I even bother continuing texting her or should I stay ghost till Sunday?

[godzilla]

(11-14-2015 12:27 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

I know this has been written about ad nauseum. This is my random attempt on a sleepy Saturday to compile my thoughts on text game.

Off the bat, text game is very unnatural to me. I'm a writer. My goal is to convey cogent, intelligent, and meaningful thoughts to people who care to read them. When I first got into this, my natural inclination was to write text messages similar to my writing - meaningful, articulate, expressions of the thoughts going on in my brain. Unfortunately, that actually had the affect of turning women off. Gradually, my text game improved, albeit it's completely contrary to my natural style of communication.

Important caveat - if she's into you, short of sending text her missives of your undying love and affection, you can basically text her whatever the fuck you want to text her. If she likes you, she'll move mountains to see you. If she doesn't, she'll flake, not return your texts, and make excuses about how her dog is sick and she can't come out. No matter how solid your "text game" is, it comes down to whether she's attracted to you or not. The most alpha text in the world can't save a situation where the frame has been lost. It just can't.

Given that's the case, in my view, you can't really generate attraction with text messages, but you can fuck it up. Any attraction I've ever generated through text has been by relentlessly keeping frame.

Given that's the case, plus the fact I hate text messaging (typing with my thumbs sucks), I take an extremely minimalist approach to texting. This is what I've found to be very effective:

1. All lowercase, no grammar, and constant abbreviations. "come on wed nite". I do not know why this is effective, or why chicks like it, but they do.

Yes, this goes completely against my actual style of communication. On Facebook, OkCupid, Tinder, everywhere - everything is lowercase with zero punctuation.

It's particularly ironic because I write a blog that people know about (which has even gotten me bangs before).

2. Do not use ? or ask questions as much as practically possible. Instead, issue commands. Do not give her options. "taco loco @ 7pm"

This makes sense - making decisions is hard. Women hate making decisions. When you say shit like "Do you want to get tacos, steak, or Chinese? We could go this place, this place, or that place" you're forcing her to make a decision, which is making her do work. You're forcing her to lead the interaction. That's feminine.

It's your job to make decisions, so make them. "i want steak tonight, lets hit up steak house at 730. ill send u an uber at 7. dress hot"

Issuing commands and making decisions makes the whole thing much easier for her. You're essentially saying "Just do what I say and everything will be fine. I've got everything under control. Let's have a good time." Take command, be in charge, and make the whole night easy for her.

Try and eliminate any questions from your texts. You can even ask questions without asking them by saying stuff like "and this is because...", etc.

3. Do not use LOL or any emocons. That shit is for females. You know what's gayer than getting a text like "Hi Hank! Today my cat jumped up the wall and did something stupid! LOL! Talk to you soon! "

Nothing.

If one of my male friends sent me that text the response would be "What the fuck?" So what makes you think a female isn't thinking the same thing?

You're a man, act like one.

4. Don't be afraid to ignore text messages.

Your aloofness has to grow with the relationship, as a girl who is on the fence might just say "fuck it." But particularly as things progress, feel free to ignore text messages. You've got better shit to do than look at her selfies or talk about the cat.

I ignore a good 20% - 25% of texts I get from females.

"Hank, this guy said this creepy thing to me at work today, what should I do?"
[no response]
[hours later]
"Hank, watcha doing?"
"playing vids"
"Can I come over?"
"maybe later"

5. Pictures of something are okay from time to time.

"Hank, watcha doing?"
[picture of courtroom]
"trying to avoid jail"

(for those of you who don't know I'm a lawyer)

Dry humor is way better than over the top humor. This would be dumb:

"Hank, watcha doing?"
[picture of courtroom]
"Hopefully they don't find out where the bodies are buried and let me out after 10 years! But man, I'm in so much trouble if they find out about the goat. LOL!"

Google "laconic wit".

6. Zero emotion ever. Picture the most masculine males you know. They're generally stoic, hard to read, and not emotive.

On the other hand, females communicate by expressing their emotion. As a masculine male, you do not. So do not do this in text messages. I.e., do not text stuff like:

"It was so great to see you!"
"I had an AMAZING time last night!"
"Your cat is SO FUNNY!"
"That's AWESOME!"
"I miss you. "

Avoid caps and exclamation points. Less is more.

7. On the same note, some goto texts you can use -

"cool"
"ok"
"sure"
"nice"
"i see"
"yeah"
"sweet"
"oh"
"nah"

If you can say it in one word, say it in one word.

This is very useful:

https://heartiste.wordpress.com/2014/03/...t-of-game/

8. At the same time, do not reward flakey or bad behavior. Here is a bad exchange -

"Hey Hank! I know we're supposed to go Steak House tonight around 9, but my dog got sick and I can't come out."
"k"

That's totally submissive, even though it's short. What you're saying is "It's okay you flaked on me at the last minute for something stupid. I sure hope you'll bless me with the pleasure of your company sometime soon, though!"

No.

What you're actually trying to say is "fuck you", without saying it. A good response is nothing at all if she doesn't try and reschedule, or something like "i see", "oh", or "pffft".

"oh" is my goto for bad behavior.

"I made out with ten guys last night!"
"oh"

"You aren't nice to me like Joe beta!"
"oh"

"Sorry, to do this, but I have to cancel on tonight..."
"oh"

"Hank, I can't stand the way you [do this that and the other thing]"
"oh"

"oh" is a way of saying "zero fucks given" in two letters.

9. Do not ever apologize for anything ever over text, and do not have long or serious discussions about anything over it.

"Hank, did you get drunk last night and eat all my leftovers?"
"idk"
"You did, Hank, I know you!!!! I was going to eat them for lunch today, and now I have to eat lunch somewhere else. I'm so mad at you!"
"they were delish"
"You are so disrespectful! We need to have a talk about how you treat me."

"That isn't funny!"

"Hank, I'm being serious. We need to have a discussion about how you treat me. Sometimes I feel like you're disrespectful and don't care about my feelings or needs."
"driving, talk to u ltr"

Once you start actually responding, you've fallen into her trap. Don't apologize, and don't have serious discussions about anything over text message.

10. Most of this does not apply to your guy friends. Don't send them gay texts about your feelings, but you can actually send them intelligent, cogent, meaningful thoughts over text messages. My text messages to males are vastly different than what I send to females.

Those are just some of my random musings about text messaging.

I generally agree with most of the advice here. At the same time, improving your text game is also about changing your attitude towards women. Your not going to say dumb shit like "I had an amazing night with you" if you don't really give a shit either way. Or apologize to them for that matter.

I text with misspellings and bad grammer all the time. Not because I want to, because I have 10 other girls I'm texting and I need to text fast.

I don't even worry about ignoring texts anymore. Most of us don't really care what they say anyway. We have one goal in mind, to obtain sex. We respond in the way that we believe best fits our goals. As long as your not texting them back like an idiot every 2 mins, I really haven't seen a huge difference.

Or for example. I don't ask them questions anymore where or when we are going to meet, because we are going to meet where I want to meet. (though for some reason as a latin guy i had argue with girls in Colombia all the time, gringo stigma?)

Number 8 is especially important. However, once you develop an attitude that every girl is expendable this is shouldn't a problem either.

[crudeloyalist]

This thread is gold. I just started to implement this on a few girls I matched with on Tinder; already got a date lined up for Friday night.

Thanks Hank.

[CynicalContrarian]

(11-19-2015 04:01 PM)crudeloyalist Wrote:  

This thread is gold. I just started to implement this on a few girls I matched with on Tinder; already got a date lined up for Friday night.

Thanks Hank.

Thank Hank.

Hmm. I think that rhymes for a reason.

[GenoMalkin]

First of all, let me start by saying I'm surprised this thread only has ~30 posts. The way I see it, in the modern dating ecosphere, texting is an integral part of game because this is the preferred mode of communication by women. At this point in our culture this is just where women are most comfortable, and getting to that comfort zone is key when first meeting a girl.

Texting is the "Blast off" to any relationship or fling with a girl. It can start off well, or it can start off on the wrong foot. Of course it's true that if a girl is really into you, texting game isn't as important. Still, I've found that text game can often make or break a potential bang.

This is not to say that you should disregard phone calls. It's an important part of the equation, but also depends on the girl and the cues you are picking up. Often times, if you just met a girl in a bar, she's not going to feel comfortable talking on the phone. Of course, you can use that to your advantage with proper strategy/timing - I've found that a well placed, confidently spoken phone call can really seal the deal - but these days, 99% of the time, communication starts through text.

As a general texting rule after getting a girl's number, I always open casually, ask about the rest of the night we met. Try to remember **** about her from the night you met her, reference it early and often, and swoop in for a date without wasting too much texting time.

The jump to phone call can be crucial - because it places you in the position of power.

Example. Brief text conversation after grabbing a number:

Me: hey ____, did you get home safe last night
Her: yeah, thanks for asking, bla bla bla I'm so hungover
Me: you should rest up, you probably have a busy week at ____
Her: [any response will do]
Me: i'm free later this week if you want to grab a drink/coffee
Her: Okay, Thursday is best
Me: cool, that works for me too

I like to leave the conversation hanging here for a minute. She might follow up saying a time where she's available, or the convo might die there. That's fine, because it perfectly sets you up to call her Wednesday night to set up a time for Thursday.

Few more notes on general text etiquette. Hank really nails it in terms of being succinct, and to the point. This is crucial. You do NOT want to send a really long text, basically ever. Especially after just meeting a girl. This is a sign of weakness and you want to remain the "mysterious alpha male figure who asked for my number" who is busy with his work/hobbies/cool life. You are not giving up your life story or too much details about yourself. Save that for the date and when you're getting her all liquored up. You're texting her because you want to see her again. Don't waste your fucking time texting about your messy roommates, how much you hate Monday, etc. Close a date and build the anticipation until you see her in person.

Lower case thing: I completely agree. Stay casual as possible. No need for any proper punctuation. The only exceptions I make are for demanding questions (I will put a question mark), and I also capitalize names/restaurant names. I do however disagree with Hank about grammar and the text abbreviation thing. I make sure to ALWAYS use proper spelling, always spell out the word "you", and I don't refrain from using big words (unless the girl is stupid). Again, the key is to be succinct, but you don't want to downplay your intelligence either.

One final point: Love the "oh" thing. That's legitimately the best way to handle flaking/ghosting/general women fuckery. Great stuff Hank.

[SomeFcksGiven]

I've also found that mirroring her texting style can benefit you.

If she abbreviates everything, uses lower case, and throws in emoticons, then you do the same (but very sparingly on the emoticons)

If her texts are properly composed, correct spelling/grammar, etc then do that. She may be the type who finds intelligence attractive (rare, but it happens) and gets turned off by guys who text like they're a frat boy.

Again, this is just in the early stages. Once a girl is hooked on you it doesn't make much difference anymore. Hank's style can really benefit you at that point.

[Genghis Khan]

What do you guys think about girls who themself use full sentences (proper grammar, capitalization, etc)? I'm texting this one girl right now who always uses full proper sentences. So I respond with full sentences as well, though it doesn't seem to be going so well.

It seems very counterintuitive to follow these rules with girls who seem like they actually know English.

[HankMoody]

(11-28-2015 02:56 AM)Genghis Khan Wrote:  

What do you guys think about girls who themself use full sentences (proper grammar, capitalization, etc)? I'm texting this one girl right now who always uses full proper sentences. So I respond with full sentences as well, though it doesn't seem to be going so well.

It seems very counterintuitive to follow these rules with girls who seem like they actually know English.

Stick to your laconic game. It intrigues them. Mirroring their own texts just bores them.

Intrigue creates attraction. Boredom creates friend zones.

[HankMoody]

Another thing to note...

Most guys do actually send long, well punctuated, grammatically correct text messages, often with emocons. Especially if the girl is doing the same.

Sending short, laconic text messages is different and therefore intriguing.

Later in the relationship it builds comfort, because they start to see that you're a guy who isn't going to get phased over text. You're not going to freak out and send an emotional text wall, or respond to her antics emotionally. You're a man whose emotions are in check.

[XXL]

I'm so guilty of this ^^. However those were the cases where I was so pissed off I had to unleash the beast within me and go all out with drama stuff and that's why I it worked for me.

In any other case yeah those long perfect texts are kind of childish.

[Aussie_Thinker]

(11-14-2015 12:27 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

8. At the same time, do not reward flakey or bad behavior. Here is a bad exchange -

"Hey Hank! I know we're supposed to go Steak House tonight around 9, but my dog got sick and I can't come out."
"k"

That's totally submissive, even though it's short. What you're saying is "It's okay you flaked on me at the last minute for something stupid. I sure hope you'll bless me with the pleasure of your company sometime soon, though!"

No.

What you're actually trying to say is "fuck you", without saying it. A good response is nothing at all if she doesn't try and reschedule, or something like "i see", "oh", or "pffft".

"oh" is my goto for bad behavior.

"I made out with ten guys last night!"
"oh"

"You aren't nice to me like Joe beta!"
"oh"

"Sorry, to do this, but I have to cancel on tonight..."
"oh"

"Hank, I can't stand the way you [do this that and the other thing]"
"oh"

"oh" is a way of saying "zero fucks given" in two letters.

Something similar that I recently used to good effect (followed by dumb crap that I immediately regretted) is 'lame'. Think Heartiste mentions using 'lame' quite a bit.

Example from the other night:

Me: So you coming then?
Her: Nah man I feel sick as
Me: Lame. Hope you feel better then
Her: I mean I could

And after that I proceed to fuck it up.

If I had it again it would probably look more like:

Me: you coming
Her: blah blah
Me: lame
Her: blah blah

But practice makes perfect.

[MrRoundtree]

This texting method has been counter-effective for me in Europe...I had messages from German girls asking me why i'm sending tiny lonely words instead of proper sentences and thought it was retarded like if I didn't give a shit...then emoticons helped me create rapport with them and joking.. In France one girl asked me if tey were teaching us how to write in Quebec!!

I never did this in North American before but basically in Europe you seem like a social retard if you don't use emoticons or sentences that mean something, cutting short made me lose the interest of girls on straight to the point messages...

Basically if you seem like you are not giving a shit about them, it will be very counter-effective by texting. The best way to create rapport with european woman is the use of emoticons.

[HankMoody]

Apropos... this popped up on my Facebook tonight -

[birthday cat]

(11-29-2015 02:45 PM)MrRoundtree Wrote:  

This texting method has been counter-effective for me in Europe...I had messages from German girls asking me why i'm sending tiny lonely words instead of proper sentences and thought it was retarded like if I didn't give a shit...then emoticons helped me create rapport with them and joking.. In France one girl asked me if tey were teaching us how to write in Quebec!!

I never did this in North American before but basically in Europe you seem like a social retard if you don't use emoticons or sentences that mean something, cutting short made me lose the interest of girls on straight to the point messages...

Basically if you seem like you are not giving a shit about them, it will be very counter-effective by texting. The best way to create rapport with european woman is the use of emoticons.

Many of the recommendations in this thread are similar to Heartiste's blogs about texting so consider his perspective. He is dealing with the worst of the worst in Washington DC.

They are good recommendations for North American girls especially the less feminine girls in major cities. Many of the recommendations don't apply in other parts of the world or with girls met online.

For example - use better grammar and spelling if the girl's first language isn't English. It is too easy for things to be misunderstood or taken out of context.

Another example - many girls in other countries will be nervous about meeting foreigners especially if both people aren't fluent in the same language. Building comfort is very important. I've seen guys do very well with making jokes, complimenting girls on their pictures, and using emoticons as long as these things are done within reason.

[Jesus Christ]

The best text game is usually no text game. Use it only for logistics. Everything should be done in person. The best response to a girl trying to start a conversation is usually no response.

[reino341]

(11-29-2015 02:45 PM)MrRoundtree Wrote:  

This texting method has been counter-effective for me in Europe...I had messages from German girls asking me why i'm sending tiny lonely words instead of proper sentences and thought it was retarded like if I didn't give a shit...then emoticons helped me create rapport with them and joking.. In France one girl asked me if tey were teaching us how to write in Quebec!!

I never did this in North American before but basically in Europe you seem like a social retard if you don't use emoticons or sentences that mean something, cutting short made me lose the interest of girls on straight to the point messages...

Basically if you seem like you are not giving a shit about them, it will be very counter-effective by texting. The best way to create rapport with european woman is the use of emoticons.

Did you get the numbers online or in the field and how big is your data set here? Sounds like a bit of a generalization to me to put all european girls in the same box.

> In France one girl asked me if tey were teaching us how to write in Quebec!!

So? It's a test.

[VforVlad]

(11-14-2015 12:27 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

I know this has been written about ad nauseum. This is my random attempt on a sleepy Saturday to compile my thoughts on text game.

Off the bat, text game is very unnatural to me. I'm a writer. My goal is to convey cogent, intelligent, and meaningful thoughts to people who care to read them. When I first got into this, my natural inclination was to write text messages similar to my writing - meaningful, articulate, expressions of the thoughts going on in my brain. Unfortunately, that actually had the affect of turning women off. Gradually, my text game improved, albeit it's completely contrary to my natural style of communication.

Important caveat - if she's into you, short of sending text her missives of your undying love and affection, you can basically text her whatever the fuck you want to text her. If she likes you, she'll move mountains to see you. If she doesn't, she'll flake, not return your texts, and make excuses about how her dog is sick and she can't come out. No matter how solid your "text game" is, it comes down to whether she's attracted to you or not. The most alpha text in the world can't save a situation where the frame has been lost. It just can't.

Given that's the case, in my view, you can't really generate attraction with text messages, but you can fuck it up. Any attraction I've ever generated through text has been by relentlessly keeping frame.

Given that's the case, plus the fact I hate text messaging (typing with my thumbs sucks), I take an extremely minimalist approach to texting. This is what I've found to be very effective:

1. All lowercase, no grammar, and constant abbreviations. "come on wed nite". I do not know why this is effective, or why chicks like it, but they do.

Yes, this goes completely against my actual style of communication. On Facebook, OkCupid, Tinder, everywhere - everything is lowercase with zero punctuation.

It's particularly ironic because I write a blog that people know about (which has even gotten me bangs before).

2. Do not use ? or ask questions as much as practically possible. Instead, issue commands. Do not give her options. "taco loco @ 7pm"

This makes sense - making decisions is hard. Women hate making decisions. When you say shit like "Do you want to get tacos, steak, or Chinese? We could go this place, this place, or that place" you're forcing her to make a decision, which is making her do work. You're forcing her to lead the interaction. That's feminine.

It's your job to make decisions, so make them. "i want steak tonight, lets hit up steak house at 730. ill send u an uber at 7. dress hot"

Issuing commands and making decisions makes the whole thing much easier for her. You're essentially saying "Just do what I say and everything will be fine. I've got everything under control. Let's have a good time." Take command, be in charge, and make the whole night easy for her.

Try and eliminate any questions from your texts. You can even ask questions without asking them by saying stuff like "and this is because...", etc.

3. Do not use LOL or any emocons. That shit is for females. You know what's gayer than getting a text like "Hi Hank! Today my cat jumped up the wall and did something stupid! LOL! Talk to you soon! "

Nothing.

If one of my male friends sent me that text the response would be "What the fuck?" So what makes you think a female isn't thinking the same thing?

You're a man, act like one.

4. Don't be afraid to ignore text messages.

Your aloofness has to grow with the relationship, as a girl who is on the fence might just say "fuck it." But particularly as things progress, feel free to ignore text messages. You've got better shit to do than look at her selfies or talk about the cat.

I ignore a good 20% - 25% of texts I get from females.

"Hank, this guy said this creepy thing to me at work today, what should I do?"
[no response]
[hours later]
"Hank, watcha doing?"
"playing vids"
"Can I come over?"
"maybe later"

5. Pictures of something are okay from time to time.

"Hank, watcha doing?"
[picture of courtroom]
"trying to avoid jail"

(for those of you who don't know I'm a lawyer)

Dry humor is way better than over the top humor. This would be dumb:

"Hank, watcha doing?"
[picture of courtroom]
"Hopefully they don't find out where the bodies are buried and let me out after 10 years! But man, I'm in so much trouble if they find out about the goat. LOL!"

Google "laconic wit".

6. Zero emotion ever. Picture the most masculine males you know. They're generally stoic, hard to read, and not emotive.

On the other hand, females communicate by expressing their emotion. As a masculine male, you do not. So do not do this in text messages. I.e., do not text stuff like:

"It was so great to see you!"
"I had an AMAZING time last night!"
"Your cat is SO FUNNY!"
"That's AWESOME!"
"I miss you. "

Avoid caps and exclamation points. Less is more.

7. On the same note, some goto texts you can use -

"cool"
"ok"
"sure"
"nice"
"i see"
"yeah"
"sweet"
"oh"
"nah"

If you can say it in one word, say it in one word.

This is very useful:

https://heartiste.wordpress.com/2014/03/...t-of-game/

8. At the same time, do not reward flakey or bad behavior. Here is a bad exchange -

"Hey Hank! I know we're supposed to go Steak House tonight around 9, but my dog got sick and I can't come out."
"k"

That's totally submissive, even though it's short. What you're saying is "It's okay you flaked on me at the last minute for something stupid. I sure hope you'll bless me with the pleasure of your company sometime soon, though!"

No.

What you're actually trying to say is "fuck you", without saying it. A good response is nothing at all if she doesn't try and reschedule, or something like "i see", "oh", or "pffft".

"oh" is my goto for bad behavior.

"I made out with ten guys last night!"
"oh"

"You aren't nice to me like Joe beta!"
"oh"

"Sorry, to do this, but I have to cancel on tonight..."
"oh"

"Hank, I can't stand the way you [do this that and the other thing]"
"oh"

"oh" is a way of saying "zero fucks given" in two letters.

9. Do not ever apologize for anything ever over text, and do not have long or serious discussions about anything over it.

"Hank, did you get drunk last night and eat all my leftovers?"
"idk"
"You did, Hank, I know you!!!! I was going to eat them for lunch today, and now I have to eat lunch somewhere else. I'm so mad at you!"
"they were delish"
"You are so disrespectful! We need to have a talk about how you treat me."

"That isn't funny!"

"Hank, I'm being serious. We need to have a discussion about how you treat me. Sometimes I feel like you're disrespectful and don't care about my feelings or needs."
"driving, talk to u ltr"

Once you start actually responding, you've fallen into her trap. Don't apologize, and don't have serious discussions about anything over text message.

10. Most of this does not apply to your guy friends. Don't send them gay texts about your feelings, but you can actually send them intelligent, cogent, meaningful thoughts over text messages. My text messages to males are vastly different than what I send to females.

Those are just some of my random musings about text messaging.

Awesome write-up. This resonates with me. I will save this somewhere so I can keep looking at it regularly for daily reminders. I'm looking over some of my texts right now and I'm seeing what i could've done differently.

I've done what you recommend by accident in short spurts without even realizing it. But it's a post like this that serves as a reminder.

[VforVlad]

I have seen girls who do the "oh" thing or "ah". That's the only one i would question.

It sounds like you're shocked. Maybe follow it up with a K.'


Oh [5:21]

K [5:26]

Give her 5 mins to respond after the OH? Then a K. Of course i'm overthinking it...it's not that big of a deal.

[MrRoundtree]

(12-02-2015 07:06 AM)reino341 Wrote:  

(11-29-2015 02:45 PM)MrRoundtree Wrote:  

This texting method has been counter-effective for me in Europe...I had messages from German girls asking me why i'm sending tiny lonely words instead of proper sentences and thought it was retarded like if I didn't give a shit...then emoticons helped me create rapport with them and joking.. In France one girl asked me if tey were teaching us how to write in Quebec!!

I never did this in North American before but basically in Europe you seem like a social retard if you don't use emoticons or sentences that mean something, cutting short made me lose the interest of girls on straight to the point messages...

Basically if you seem like you are not giving a shit about them, it will be very counter-effective by texting. The best way to create rapport with european woman is the use of emoticons.

Did you get the numbers online or in the field and how big is your data set here? Sounds like a bit of a generalization to me to put all european girls in the same box.

> In France one girl asked me if tey were teaching us how to write in Quebec!!

So? It's a test.

Mostly from bars but i did get some numbers online or from tinder...I would say the germans, the dutch, the scandinavians were the one using the most emoticons in Europe but overall RUssians and Ukrainians were at top int erm of showing emotions on text.

In France its true that girls are a bit more cold but not as much as in America/Quebec.. and I passed the test well but I also realised that Quebec texting method was not going to work in France..that's also coincidently when I've gotten the best results.

I spent 1 year there and 6 months 3 years ago.

[Sourcecode]

Old thread bump cause I'm not sure where to put a question like this.

I've got a girl that's a ridiculous bad texter.
She can respond anywhere from instantly to multiple days later.. Even when we have plans set.

The thing is.. She doesn't flake.
I've been busting her guys open and sending her home for three months straight.

I've never met a legitimate bad texter..
Usually if they are flaky in text.. They are flaky in person.
But this girl shows up every Thursday.


Anyone have this experience?

[torridon747]

Current girlfriend is like that. She's very with it in person and puts a lot of effort in but her short term memory is retarded bad. She either replies right away or hours later. I go through her phone occasionally and I'm not the only one this happens to.

If you're up for losing some cool points double text her or call her. Just make sure the rest of your game is on point. At a certain point when you know what you're doing (100+ rep is indicative) I think it's safe to ignore the usually good game rules like don't double text and always be aloof. Have fun man, if you're doing well with her and she never flakes you don't have to be so dogmatic. That is of course not an open invitation to use bad game and let your frame slip but to feel it out and have fun.

[Vienna]

The OP and general sentiment of this thread applies mostly to American chicks, I suspect. If you were to text like this in Europe (specifically Scandinavia and Central Europe in my experience) you'd probably lower your chances and lose out on girls.

I've tried laconic, short replies with bad grammar to fake the ZFG attitude, and had horrible results... because it doesn't match my vibe. You should not expend mental energy at changing how you want to naturally text; you should use that energy to come up with some witty zingers that will get you your ultimate goal. We underestimate how many boring texters there are out there, and girls are still not used to being one-upped by textual ripostes from guys. That is good, be the guy she wonders how to reply to.

In Europe it's okay to send longer texts, emoticons etc., as long as you don't overdo it. I mirror the girl's texts, and you can get away with wordier replies as long as you have the girls laughing.

Like Eugenics said, just have fun. Be congruent with your real vibe.