[memcpy]

Getting her to the bedroom is more important than sexualizing the conversation.

I've made girls laugh, talked about sex, told them interesting stories, etc. Only to have them go ghost. Getting them to the bedroom was more important than all of that combined.

I've banged girls who never laughed at my jokes. Or laughed at all. Logistics > sexualizing the conversation.

[Troublesome]

(11-14-2015 07:52 PM)memcpy Wrote:  

Getting her to the bedroom is more important than sexualizing the conversation.

I've made girls laugh, talked about sex, told them interesting stories, etc. Only to have them go ghost. Getting them to the bedroom was more important than all of that combined.

I've banged girls who never laughed at my jokes. Or laughed at all. Logistics > sexualizing the conversation.

not good idea make them little too comfortable. Laughing too much make you look clownish and soft get friendzoned

[elRey]

I have personally found that there is quite a big variation in how sexual girls will let you get how quickly - and still be very interested you. It can be certainly off-putting, though. On one tinder date I had my hand on the girl's ass in public within a couple of minutes of meeting her in person, and the result was that we were fucking within an hour behind some public tennis courts.

However, some girls just WILL NOT let you escalate quickly. Sure, there are ways to get around that especially if your game is extremely tight. But sometimes not. Sometimes you literally just need to spend more time with them.

I just came from a first date this afternoon and we got on great, she was texting me afterwards that she thinks I'm cool and she can't wait to see me again - but she was literally saying don't touch me, when I'd touch her. It was unnerving - which is why you gotta stay cool and not needy. It totally depends on the mood and logistics - logistics were terrible today. I am confident we are going to be regularly fucking soon; the chemistry was unbelievable and we live relatively close to each other. But again sometimes the only key is more time - not a lot of time, but yes sometimes they just need to feel that they are not coming across as easy.

Another example, I met a Venezuelan girl on a tram while I was in Melbourne for a week towards the end of the trip. Again, we really clicked and she was super into me. I met her for a first date the next day the day I was flying out (was flying back that evening to Sydney). I was extremely aggressive with the touching the whole time I was with her. She would let me take two steps forward then push me a step back. I couldn't figure out. We were openly talking about sex and how she likes to be fucked (tenderly but very rough towards the end). She even showed me a video on her phone of her fucking some guy and asked if I thought it was hot. But, she wouldn't let me kiss her. Again, logistics were poor, and I was flying home that evening. Towards the end of the date I asked her if I was in Melbourne longer would she make love to me, and she said yes, but she just met me and doesn't want to come off easy on the first date by kissing or having sex.

Girls have different timelines of when they view escalation as acceptable to themselves. But it is importance to balance this with consistent escalation because the adage is true: girls will forgive you for being overly forward but will not forgive you for not pushing when they are open. Touching is more important than sexual conversation, I believe, but in case you need some entry points to talk about it here are some I have used:

- If the conversation can be steered onto how religious she is or I am, I will mention how I used to be very religious but sex was a big awakening to how out of touch religion can be regarding that. Once I figured out how enjoyable it was and how natural, the separation from my religious practices became inevitable.
- If you are talking to someone from a different culture (I talk to a lot of Latinas for example) then you can compare the differences between westerners and latinos, one of the key differences being the way either views or participates in love making. I come right out and say how having sex with a latina is often a very emotional experience and is true love making with a lot of foreplay, eye contact, and is just more beautiful, whereas with aussie girls its a little more animalistic and rough. there are pros and cons of both. be careful if you use this not to dis your own culture too much, it makes you seem out of touch. definitely go out of your way to recognise the benefits of western women sexually since not appreciating your own culture can make you seem weird.

there are other ways to start talking about it, but for me, these have been reliable methods to get the conversation sexual.

However in my experience - if a girl is out with you, and you know you're attractive - then ALWAYS BE CLOSING. Escalation is important, but logistics is probably the overwhelming reason why I am fucking girls later rather than sooner, or not at all. logistics logistics logistics is the name of the game for me at the moment.

It sucks 1) living with family and 2) being a religious household. For now, it's just banging at other girls' places

[the Thing]

(11-15-2015 03:41 AM)elRey Wrote:  

Towards the end of the date I asked her if I was in Melbourne longer would she make love to me, and she said yes, but she just met me and doesn't want to come off easy on the first date by kissing or having sex.

Instead she decided to show you videos of her getting fucked because that totally makes sense.

I can see a sewer rat sized hamster spinning a tractor tire right now.

BTW don't get me wrong but sounds like she kinda beta orbiter'ed you

[eradicator]

(11-02-2015 07:36 PM)LINUX Wrote:  

I usually do this within the first ten minutes. I find a good time for this is when they ask, and they always do ask this, "What do you like to do?" or "Tell me about yourself?"

and then I usually reply "Honestly, I think I like making love more that 99.9% of most people on this earth."

I've never once lost a lay or had a date go sour because I said this. If anything, things only get easier from here because I am upfront and honest with my intentions. The date then transforms into a conversation that I actually enjoy and soon after we take it to the house and finish the night in bed.

I like this, I will try using this line this evening, am meeting a yoga girl that I met off of okcupid.

[elRey]

(11-15-2015 07:50 PM)the Thing Wrote:  

Instead she decided to show you videos of her getting fucked because that totally makes sense.

I can see a sewer rat sized hamster spinning a tractor tire right now.

BTW don't get me wrong but sounds like she kinda beta orbiter'ed you

All I know is that had I been there even an extra day, I would have had her. Logistics and timing were just ridiculously bad considering I was leaving that night and she had to work in the afternoon.

Excuses aside, physical escalation is something I need to work on. She just kept pushing me away and then letting me do more. Maybe we could have done it behind a bush or something if she was down. What sort of touching do you think are girls less resistant to?

[The_Don_Führer]

Depends on the energy level of the approach.

Energy level of the approach is dependent upon what the energy level of the target upon the open.

[PapayaTapper]

Bumping this thread because Ive seen the topic of "sexualizing conversations" come up in several threads and the question of "how" has come up by numerous newer guys over the last couple months

So listen up kiddies.

Sexualizing a conversation properly is an important skill that is worth discussing

Why?

Because sexualizing conversation is absolutely ESSENTIAL to turning a woman on and getting her excited about sex with you.

But the key is doing it properly

Not sexualizing the conversation enough leads to boring interview type question and answer sessions and is fast track to the dreaded "friend zone". Talking about work, school, where youre from, how many brothers and sisters you have to a girl you just met?...You may as well say "Im a fag...lets be friends".

Its worth repeating:

Boring = no attraction.

No attraction = no pussy

But going too far leads to the same result: no sex. Too "aggressive" in the sexualization and you will effectively kill attraction. "Creepy" is almost as bad as boring.

Creepy = no attraction

No attraction = no pussy

But please, don’t assume that it’s wrong to use sexual conversation to flirt with women. They love it too, and not just from guys who are already their boyfriends.

But the art of sexualizing a conversation properly is about subtlety, nuance , context and adjustment based on verbal and no verbal response cues*

We both men and women, all think about sex and hell, most of us enjoy talking about it in the right context. And that’s the key – it has to feel appropriate.

What most don’t understand is that flirting with women is all about subtlety. You have to say a lot while only saying a little.

You don’t need to blatantly state your sexual intentions. In fact, you want almost everything to be implied initially. Once you’ve have started hooking up with a girl or having phone sex, you can be more obvious...but that's another topic. For our purposes Im talking about girls you've just met and have not banged.

Why you have to be subtle
If you’re too forward too soon, it triggers her to…

-Feel sexual shame (aka anti-slot defense or ASD). Many women are dealing with some sort of shame about their sexuality from family, friends, religion, or culture. Even though everyone wants sex, they may feel wrong about being “dirty” or “too easy”. If a girl is confronted with those negative thoughts and starts to question herself, that shame will almost always win out.

The best way to overcome that ASD response is by making her feel progressively aroused. Her positive emotions will usually overpower her negative logic. And by starting small and subtle, you give her a chance to feel sexual without getting the big red flags telling her it’s wrong to feel that way. Remember girls are all about how they feel. You trigger her ASD and its not her issue (in her mind)...youre just creepy

-Think you’re attracted for the wrong reasons. Women know physical looks attract men. But a girl also wants to know that you’re excited by her specifically, not just because of her appearance or because she’s a warm body in that moment. She wants to feel like her beauty may have sparked your initial interest, but her personality and connection with you is what continues to fuel your attraction. (Its called "game for a reason")

If you’re acting overtly sexual from the beginning, she knows you’re only in it to get laid. She knows that but again you need to create the correct response. You want attraction to grow into arousal

-Feel like she’s your “prey”. The surefire way to make a girl think you’re a creepy predator is to come on strong and then show a lack of social awareness when she doesn’t reciprocate. The intensity of your flirting should match or closely match how warm she’s responding to your early advances. Then, your banter will feel like a mutual connection (rather than just some guy blindly throwing himself at her).

Show her you’re aware of her comfort level by letting the attraction naturally build as you flirt back and forth. In other words learn to verbally escalate similarly to how you physically would

Cont

[PapayaTapper]

cont

What not to do

Dont use vulgar or explicit sexual language too early.

As I said, a sexual connection must grow gradually (but when done properly this can happen in a matter of minutes) . Your flirting together must start by being implied in innuendo, understood through clever wordplay, or as playful banter. Being blunt or heavy handed takes away the mystery and will feel crude.

Example

Wrong: “I would love to see your ass in yoga pants.”

Instead try: “Yoga pants are one of the most important inventions of the new millenium" (smirk)

Or

"You'll have to show me your best crane pose sometime.” (smirk)

It’s all about context.

What to try:

You can use almost anything she says to segue into accusing her of having a dirty mind.

Everybody has a sexual side. In the right context and when they’re comfortable, for girts it’s fun to be “naughty”. It feels taboo and exciting at the same time.

So when she’s challenging or complimenting you, imply that you know she has more sinister intentions. Tell her that you’re on to her sneaky ways or that you’re so surprised by her secret wild side.

“Are you trying to get me drunk? Because it’s working.”

“You’re so hitting on me right now.”

“Awww, you’re trying to flirt with me. That’s adorable.”

“I can’t believe you did that…bad girl.”

She talks about doing something risky or adventurous, “See, I knew you had a naughty side to you.”
This can open up flirting really fast and be a silly game to play. If she enjoys it, she may reply one of two ways: she can run with it and say stuff like, “Oh no, you got me.” or “Well…maybe my mind is wandering just a little.” Or she can pretend to deny it, “What? I’m just a nice, innocent Midwestern girl.” or “Oh no not me, I only think about cute puppies and cupcakes.”

Misconstrue what she was saying or poke fun at her word choice.
This is where you take her statements and pretend like she was saying something more risqué. While accusing her of thinking dirty implies that she was intentional about it, this is more about her accidentally using more sexual language.

Pretend like she was saying something more flirtatious even when she wasn’t. Tease her about saying something that could be seen as sexual. You want her to get into a playful denial about what she was saying or try to explain herself.

“Is that a euphemism for something else?”

“You do realize that ‘delicious peach’ has a completely different meaning in other context, right?”

“Suuuuree you meant that.”

“Mhmm, I know what you were implying with ‘pillow fight’, you can’t fool me.”

Use clever wordplay.

Take the existing sentences and build silly statements from them. Think about related ideas to what’s being said. Exaggerate. Use sexual innuendo or double entendres.

Find hidden meanings.

Use the element of surprise.

You want to start building your wit like a good comedian would. This is the basis of a lot of my humor and how I can always find something funny or sexual in even the most seemingly mundane. When you do this, every conversation can be hot and heavy but still under the radar.

She says something like, “I’m baking cupcakes — maybe I’ll give you one.”

You say, “So then maybe if I’m lucky I’ll have my cake and eat it, too ”

She says, “Careful, I’m a ferocious shark.”

You reply, “So that means you must bite hard.”


She’s talking about learning Spanish. I say, “I can you teach me how to say, ‘PT you are so irresistible.’”

If its on then I like to give her a bold compliment.

It’s stronger to compliment a woman based on her personality rather than physical looks. That said, a more specific or unique compliment on appearance can work well.

It helps to reiterate that you find that quality attractive in her or in general with women. Use words like sexy, cute, or feisty.

Or you can playfully state that she is making you flustered or turned on.

“I find a strong moral compass to be one of the most attractive qualities in a woman.”
“I’m helpless when a woman genuinely smiles like that all the time.”

“You don’t take shit from anyone, that assertiveness is sexy.”

Convey that you’re currently thinking of her in a sexual way. THIS is the key to avoiding the friend zone

Suggesting that you’re thinking naughty thoughts in the moment can be quite a bold turn-on. But again, you want it to be subtle and after she’s responding well to some light physical contact or suggestive flirting as shown above.

“If you don’t stop teasing me, I can’t promise I’ll keep being such a nice guy.”

“You have no idea what I’m thinking about right now.”

“I have way too many terrible thoughts running through my head.”

“I have to stop myself before I say some bad things.”

Get into sexual conversation.

Talking about sex gets women thinking about sex. And if they’re talking about it with you, who do you think they’re going to start associating it with?

The easiest way to get into sexual conversation is through questions. You get her to open up about her sexual side and she asks you about yours.

By being able to discuss those things in a fun, positive way, you’ll reinforce that she experiences good emotions with you. She feels like you have a healthy view on sex and aren’t judgmental – which only makes her further consider getting intimate with you.

Your initial questions should be less personal and easier for her to answer. As long as she’s continuing to be vulnerable with you, you can get more intimate with your inquiries.

Questions go from lighter to more intimate

How comfortable are you with public affection?
Have you ever gone skinny dipping?
Have you ever had a friend with benefits?
What unexpected place do you love being touched?
What’s your most awkward or embarrassing sexual experience?
How long do you think you could go without sex?
Have you ever been caught having sex?
Do you think porn is harmful or can it open up a person or couple’s sexuality?

See the escalation?

In summary: Verbal escalation is an essential foundation to lay if you want to get into the physical escalation.

Bonus

In college I developed this little routine specifically to get the conversation about sex. I would tell chicks that I actually had multiple personality disorder. When they inevitably would ask me questions the bit would run something like this:

PT- "Yeah on one end of the spectrum I have a personality named Evan"

Chick- "Oh really? And what is Evan like?"

PT- "Well Evan is like the super sensitive guy who will hold your hand, watch a sunset with you, cuddles and makes slow sweet passionate love to you"

Chick- "Oh yeah? So what's else is in there?"

PT "Well on the other end of my personality spectrum is Mongo"

Chick "Oooh.. what's Mongo like?"

PT "Mongo is pretty much a caveman. He just reaches over and grabs you by the hair like this (I'd slide my hand up the back of their neck onto the scalp and grab a big handful of hair on the back of their head and tug...even done it to two girls at once) He then drags you into the bedroom, tears your clothes off and proceeds to jungle fuck the shit out of you"


Of course "Mongo" always gets the strongest reaction. After the "OMG's" and laughs inevitably they ask "so which personality are you?"

PT -"Oh I'm just PT but I'm the most important one"

Chick- "Oh yeah, why's that?"

PT - "Cause I'm the one that knows when and decides which of the others needs to comes out to play" (smirk)

I can't count how many times I ran that bit in bars, parties or even from the back seat of a car. I've never failed to get a very positive reaction. It especially works well on two sets and I converted a few threesomes from it

[Professor Dumbledore]

Sexualization ideas :
"Hey, I was just browsing this sex-shop online and I found this nice pegging strap, so I bought it just by curiosity. Would you like that we try it tonight?"
"Hello, it was nice being pegged last night. Hope you enjoyed taking the upper hand."

[Suits]

(06-16-2018 01:11 AM)Professor Dumbledore Wrote:  

Sexualization ideas :
"Hey, I was just browsing this sex-shop online and I found this nice pegging strap, so I bought it just by curiosity. Would you like that we try it tonight?"
"Hello, it was nice being pegged last night. Hope you enjoyed taking the upper hand."

Hey there, RBerkley.

Good to have you back on the forum.

[N°6]

Can anyone recommend a double entendre / innendo pdf or book?

Innuendo got me my first tinder lay in over a year. Within 60 seconds of arriving at her apartment. This happened within the context of tinder decline, small talk then ghosting, matching and forgetting and thot trawling for Instagram followers.

[MarshalZhukov]

(06-16-2018 02:13 AM)N°6 Wrote:  

Can anyone recommend a double entendre / innendo pdf or book?

Innuendo got me my first tinder lay in over a year. Within 60 seconds of arriving at her apartment. This happened within the context of tinder decline, small talk then ghosting, matching and forgetting and thot trawling for Instagram followers.

can you elaborate on this one ?
+1 on the book recommendation btw

(06-15-2018 02:39 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

cont

Bonus

In college I developed this little routine specifically to get the conversation about sex. I would tell chicks that I actually had multiple personality disorder. When they inevitably would ask me questions the bit would run something like this:

PT- "Yeah on one end of the spectrum I have a personality named Evan"

Chick- "Oh really? And what is Evan like?"

PT- "Well Evan is like the super sensitive guy who will hold your hand, watch a sunset with you, cuddles and makes slow sweet passionate love to you"

Chick- "Oh yeah? So what's else is in there?"

PT "Well on the other end of my personality spectrum is Mongo"

Chick "Oooh.. what's Mongo like?"

PT "Mongo is pretty much a caveman. He just reaches over and grabs you by the hair like this (I'd slide my hand up the back of their neck onto the scalp and grab a big handful of hair on the back of their head and tug...even done it to two girls at once) He then drags you into the bedroom, tears your clothes off and proceeds to jungle fuck the shit out of you"


Of course "Mongo" always gets the strongest reaction. After the "OMG's" and laughs inevitably they ask "so which personality are you?"

PT -"Oh I'm just PT but I'm the most important one"

Chick- "Oh yeah, why's that?"

PT - "Cause I'm the one that knows when and decides which of the others needs to comes out to play" (smirk)

I can't count how many times I ran that bit in bars, parties or even from the back seat of a car. I've never failed to get a very positive reaction. It especially works well on two sets and I converted a few threesomes from it

this is just great

[Bastard Sword]

Linux's answer is great. A big one is also just putting good shirtless pictures of yourself on Tinder. That or badass-looking professional photos of you in a suit or doing something cool. These things automatically sexualize you, I must have gotten at least ten lays off of Tinder just from one good shirtless picture I took years ago. I asked every single one what made them come over, all of them referenced my profile picture.

Also I feel like there's no way to sexualize a conversation with a girl who has no interest in you -- it's not about what you say, it's about subconsciously picking up on her interest. There comes a moment when you just "know", when there's a really taut sexuality between you and a girl. That's something that needs to get cultivated over time through self-improvement and more experience with women. It's not something you can create through a clever line. You just vibe the right way and then pounce. I don't think the issue is sexualizing things necessarily it's dealing with her hangups and reservations about the whole thing. I'm a very sexual person who is very direct, but that has shot me in the foot with girls who were interested but wanted to take it slower.

Sometimes I wonder whether I did the best I could and the result I got with these girls (usually third base but not sex) was all that could have happened. Other times I look back and wish I had been a little smarter when I got them in my room and we were starting to go at it. A rare few wonderful women can own their sexuality without being abrasive or guilty about it, but those are few and far between. Definitely missed out on some bad-as-fuck plates because I rushed things a little too much.

Then there was one time I was hooking up with this Mexican cutie who had a boy friend...I was fingering her and pulled off her pants. I decided not to eat her out and kept fingering her. We didn't end up fucking -- she pulled LMR on me -- but I wonder what would have happened had I just dived in and gone to town. This shit happened a year ago and I still think about it. Once you get past a certain point you get a lot of "what if" moments in game. I wonder what would have happened had I closed those girls, if my life would have been any different.

[LeoneVolpe]

I’m sure someone’s said it already, but I think one of the best ways to sexualize conversation is by making a sexual innuendo that’s plausibly deniable. If she takes the bait and returns with a sexual remark of her own, you’ve got a live one on your hands.

If she ignores, you can either bow out gracefully or persist and try again later with a little less plausibly deniable remark. If she sternly criticizes your remark, it’s probably best in this litigious society to bail but some may persist to see if it’s her true feelings or just a shit test.

[crispytaco]

I am now very careful and not to over-sexualize conversations for example. One chick I banged told me the flaked our first date because she felt too much preassure after all the sexting. I had to sart over slowly, not mention sex again, get her to my apt and do everything with kino.

So I realized I don't need to sexualize the conversation anymore and still have success.