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Mind goes blank
07-30-2015, 04:29 PM
This is just an example
At my workplace, each floor is owned by different companies and So I'm in the elevator at work and my floor is third which I can easily walk up the stairs "I say to the 6.5/10 next to me "I'm going to be a bit lazy today" she laughs and says some stuff I don't remember something about people who take the elevator down from the third. I get to the floor and say don't worry I'm not that lazy, and she says "don't worry I forgive you".
Overall it went ok because I atleast said something instead of just standing their awkwardly. The problem is in my mind I'm trying to think of things to say and my mind goes blank. It went well purely because she started talking.
Overall this happens quite often and I come accross slightly weird because I say dumb shit. What can I do to improve this aspect?
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Mind goes blank
07-30-2015, 04:31 PM
"I bet you're __________"
Make a silly assumption that teases her a bit and roll from there.
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07-30-2015, 04:36 PM
Say what you see. Your vibe and body language are more important than verbals.
Also, there is a good exercise - when you are walking down the street try to make assumptions about people that are passing by. Try to make a story about them, about their background, jobs etc.
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07-30-2015, 04:40 PM
Get a lot of practice. Your conversation chops get a lot better with practice.
Maybe also have a few talking points you can fall back on when feeling stuck.
Take care of those titties for me.
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07-30-2015, 05:38 PM
Sit at a desk for an hour and fabricate all sorts of openers. Memorize them. Before entering an elevator pick five Brest choices. Use the best one, if you can't decide pick the first from the list.
Also I would not recommend trying out untested social skills at work.
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07-31-2015, 07:21 AM
I know what you mean. I'm dealing with that too. But I am getting better. Key is to practice, practice, practice.
Solution is to practice. It's easier for me to practice in a low pressure situation since I work at a supermarket. Lots of customers I can potentially chat to with a legitimate reason. Hell, sometimes they start talking to me.
I try to make conversation, even just a few little lines, with girls behind the counter of wherever I'm buying something from.
So just keep practicing man.
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07-31-2015, 10:55 AM
I'm thinking of starting a thread on conversation basics.
Take care of those titties for me.
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07-31-2015, 12:33 PM
^ That would be a good idea
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07-31-2015, 01:04 PM
Start talking to everyone you run into so you can develop banter skills. Dudes, old ladies, baristas, and of course women. It's really the best way.
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07-31-2015, 02:00 PM
You need to avoid those succession of closed ended questions that makes everyone uncomfortable. Where do you go to school? What's your major? How old are you? Etc ad naseum
Statements and open ended questions are key to drawing people out and making a conversation varied and more interesting.
Take care of those titties for me.
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07-31-2015, 03:58 PM
My company owns 1 floor of 10 floors. The women in the elevators don't work for my company.
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08-01-2015, 03:09 PM
I had a similar episode today. I am in the supermarket, grabbing some donuts. As I wait to be attended to. There's a girl I see ordering a cake. She's wearing uniform, looks about 17 (I am 19), after I get my donuts I leave and go queue at the express till. She follows me to it, as we wait. I think of an opener. I look at her and smile "is it your birthday today?" I ask. She looks at me shyly for some seconds then blurts out a "no", my mind went blank in that moment. I didn't know what to say so I said "oh cool, was going to wish you a happy birthday" and slowly walked away to another till. I didn't know what to say. What would have been appropriate in that scenario? Assuming I wanted to get her number?
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08-01-2015, 03:53 PM
Lifts are interesting places for conversations. I once picked up a Latvian girl in the lift, went on a date but didn't bang. The good thing is that if you're with one person only, the lift itself generates proximity and privacy. On the other hand, if you're too forward it may make a girl feel uncomfortable because she can't immediately cut it and leave. Also, in most case scenarios you have less than a minute to make your pitch. In ideal scenario you take together (or a girl joins at some lower floor) lift towards the groundfloor and you leave the building together. If you feel she's interested, close in a lobby or, preferably, outside, for there will be lesser chance anyone who works in the building would notice. A well-tailored situational opener preferred. If she's bored and you can make her laugh, you've broke away from the pack of most office guys.
Non-sequitor game:
She joins you in a lift, presses whatever floor button, you say semi-ironically 'That's a great choice, I like it too,' when pointing with your finger at the buttons. That's a risky one, but if delivered well, should make her laugh. If she does, introduce yourself.
Non-serious-compliment game:
She joins you in a lift, presses whatever floor button, you say casually 'I like how your blouse/dress/skirt/whatever matches the colour of the wall/floor/whatever in here. Did you do that on purpose? That's interesting.' If she smiles, give her your card.
I'm-a-real-deal game:
She joins you in a lift, presses whatever floor button apart from the top floor, you say nonchalantly: 'I thought you could aim higher than this'. If she knee-jerks, put her hand on your crotch. Game as per usual.
Just be creative, come up with default ten-go-to lift related openers and you'll have half the girls working in the building swoon over you in the cafeteria.
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08-06-2015, 04:52 PM
Happened again twice today lol.
I'm waiting in line to hire a bike and a cute girl in front keeps turning her head around and I look her in the eyes each time. I'm still too much of a pussy to open such situations for some reason. She actually asks me how to do something on the screen, I say I have no clue because I haven't hired a bike before. She says some stuff I remember and I reply then she says thank you for the help even though I didn't at all lmao. I notice she has a guy and a girl friend waiting for her. She goes and I get my bike.
Second time I ask a girl for directions to a station. She says she doesn't know but the closest station is "blah blah" and that she's going there now and says "is that helpful?" I say no not really and thank her and go. My mind just goes fucking blank anall the time.
I think a lot of this is because I'm really insecure about my looks. My jawline is extremely weak with an overbite as I've explained in previous threads. I just can't seem to think a girl will like me even though they open me or are giving signs of interests. I really can't think sexual either in those situations for some reason. As I'm walking around seeing hot girls I think damn I wanna hit that. When I get into a conversation with them, I completely forget about the goal and act way too friendly.
And btw is there a way I can change my username?
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08-10-2015, 06:30 AM
Don't worry if your mind goes blank. An alpha male doesn't talk much, just focus more on your body language when you you have nothing to say. 80% of how we communicate is through body language so take up some space and say this to yourself when she looks at you "you want to fuck me so barely but i'm too good for you." this energy will be projected subconscious.
if you want to speak, just say hi. i a woman likes you, she usually doesn't shut up!
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08-10-2015, 06:54 AM
While you're talking, keep glancing at the top of her head. Squint your eyes every once in a while, with a shit eating grin on your face. If/when your mind blanks, say "I didn't want to say anything, but there's a giant spider in your hair, just thought you should know". Usually a 75% chance she'll flip a shit, giving you a good opportunity to share a laugh and pick on her a bit.
It's a great backup if you're worried about blanking out. Even if you don't use the spider line, she'll think you're distracted by something. Like I said though, the trick is squinting your eyes with a playful, flirty grin.