[h5757]

All the pickup material that I’ve read only mentions having dates in the evening or at night. My schedule makes it extremely hard to have evening dates and dates on the weekdays, so I was thinking of doing an afternoon date on the weekend. Also, I have no experience going on actual dates because I’ve only hooked up with women in the past (during college). I’m in my late 20s and looking to date women in their late 20s to late 30s, if that matters.

How plausible is an early or late afternoon coffee date on the weekend for a first date (starting anywhere from around 2-5pm)? What are the pros and cons? What are obstacles that I’ll face?

I’m guessing it’s less effective than an evening date, but could it still allow me to escalate and eventually lead to sex (a few dates down the road)? I was thinking of doing a coffee date after lunchtime on Saturday or Sunday (around 2-5pm). After that, I’d set up a dinner date for the next week.

Also, do you think a woman would be willing to kiss me in the parking lot during the daytime after I walk her back to her car? Would it be a bad idea? Where could we kiss? Or should we just hug at the end of the date since it’s during the daytime?

I’m pretty sure having an afternoon coffee date for a first date isn’t the most effective idea, but I’m wondering if it’s doable and can lead to a kiss or at least future dates where I can kiss her in the evening after dinner.

How should I approach this? How can I make this work?

[ksbms]

Most of the pick up material rules are not "laws" in the sense of scientific laws. They are rules of thumb or, in a scientific-like parlance, heuristics. There are too many variables to track. In social sciences (and game is the area that falls into that category, somewhere between anthropology, evolutionary biology and psychology, sociology and a few other things), you are doing very well, if you can have explanatory and predictive power of 30% of the total variance. In other words, roughly 70% of why the things happen the way they do, is unknown. Thus, the best bet is to treat all the guidelines as some rough approximators.

Quote:

I’m pretty sure having an afternoon coffee date for a first date isn’t the most effective idea, but I’m wondering if it’s doable and can lead to a kiss or at least future dates where I can kiss her in the evening after dinner.

How should I approach this? How can I make this work?

First, why can't you meet with girs during evening/nights?

Afternoon coffee date is more than doable. My mate does it but not in a static, seated way. He's approach is of a dynamic "coffee date". He gets an afternoon take-away coffee/tea/whatever with them and walks around town (it helps that here it's pretty scenic). Half-way through the date, he will try to go for a kiss. If a girl gives a cheek only, he will redo the kiss some 10-15min later. Does it work always? No, but more often than you'd think, it does. Alcohol, I think is a touch overrated (not that it doesn't help, of course!) but if a girl is into you, she will let herself kissed. To some, more of a romantic type girl, the idea of kissing in a nice semi-secluded park, or in an alleyway (again, here where he lives, it's very old and interesting architecture) appeals more than a standard, alcohol infused make-out in a bar.

So, give it a try, and let us know what happened.

[TheMaleBrain]

Hi

Done a lot of those.
My suggestions are as follows:
1. Kiss - go for the kiss earlier (let's say at the 1 hour mark). This is after you escalated.
2. Lubricate her before - use sexting, on a minor level to make sure she understand it might lead to sex. I have done a lunch date for a first one, and was sexting and getting some of the rapport before.
3. You will probably won't have SDL (Same Day Lay). No problem. Try to enjoy it and frame it as "I'm not having sex on a first date, you need to qualify".
4. See if you can bounce her to another location.

Possible obstacles:
- Too many people means her ASD will be up/ Of course if some of them she already knows.
- Daytime means less chance of alcohol.
- You will have to carry most of the conversation. In the beginning it will be much less sexual (unless you established frame in advance).
- Schedule. She might have only 1-2 hours for the date, and then she made other plans.

Possible Cons:
- You seem like a solid guy.
- You will appears like a "real person".

And please, by all means, do not go to a dinner date unless you banged her.

[OregonToSoCal]

I prefer night dates so I can escalate like a mofo but afternoon coffee dates are great if you're using a two date model. My suggestions on the coffee dates are keep it light and fun,have her talk 70%+ sit side by side so you can touch her a lot, keep them to around an hour (have somewhere you need to be) and DON'T kiss her. You want to ramp the sexual tension thru the roof and give her a taste of what's to come. Then a few days later go for the night drink date or possible zero date bang at your place. Make her dinner, drinks etc.

[Dr. Howard]

(07-25-2015 01:54 PM)TheMaleBrain Wrote:  

Hi

Done a lot of those.
My suggestions are as follows:
1. Kiss - go for the kiss earlier (let's say at the 1 hour mark). This is after you escalated.
2. Lubricate her before - use sexting, on a minor level to make sure she understand it might lead to sex. I have done a lunch date for a first one, and was sexting and getting some of the rapport before.
3. You will probably won't have SDL (Same Day Lay). No problem. Try to enjoy it and frame it as "I'm not having sex on a first date, you need to qualify".
4. See if you can bounce her to another location.

Possible obstacles:
- Too many people means her ASD will be up/ Of course if some of them she already knows.
- Daytime means less chance of alcohol.
- You will have to carry most of the conversation. In the beginning it will be much less sexual (unless you established frame in advance).
- Schedule. She might have only 1-2 hours for the date, and then she made other plans.

Possible Cons:
- You seem like a solid guy.
- You will appears like a "real person".

And please, by all means, do not go to a dinner date unless you banged her.

I like the afternoon coffee date as my 'verification test' I used to use this as the filter to see if an internet girl was crazy, a SIF etc. If she wasn't and the vibe was good I'd either try to venue change or say something like "Well this was just to meet for a bit and see if you are crazy or not. I have some stuff to do this evening but you can come over and watch a movie with me and I'll make you X drink after I'm done" In between then I'd escalate via sexting, make some comment about her body that I saw on the coffee date etc.

Usually worked like a charm as I had passed their "stranger" test and they were willing to come to my apt later.

[amusedmastery]

See if you can bounce her from coffee to drinks on the same date. I've used the "it's happy hour at xyz now, let's grab a beer." Now you can escalate, touch, and hopefully get her back to your place. This can still be done without alcohol (if you don't drink), but I always recommend venue hopping to build comfort either way.

I wouldn't take girls you're dating out to dinner. Invite her over and cook for them as stated above or have her cook for you (if you can find one that knows how in the Western World). Dinner dates out are for girlfriends and wives. Don't waste your money yet.

Days are harder because it's a different vibe but still completely doable. Don't forget to use Game!!

[texrifle]

Quote:

Afternoon coffee date on the weekend for a first date

How plausible is an early or late afternoon coffee date on the weekend for a first date (starting anywhere from around 2-5pm)? What are the pros and cons? What are obstacles that I’ll face?

Absolutely doable, it's just new to you.
Pros- laid back vibe that sets a transition to a more lively date in stark contrast. Walking around afterwards is a good way to get talking and laughing, hold her hand, arm in arm etc.
Cons-depending on the coffee shop it may bee too quiet to have her laughing her ass off, which sets up perfectly for "hey lets get outta here" transition material to wherever you want to go.

Quote:

Also, do you think a woman would be willing to kiss me in the parking lot during the daytime after I walk her back to her car? Would it be a bad idea? Where could we kiss? Or should we just hug at the end of the date since it’s during the daytime?

On kissing:
I read somewhere (it's useful as hell but I can't remember who wrote it and I'm not taking credit for it) that a good rule of thumb is to go for the kiss at the first emotional high point. This can be in a park while y'all are laughing, saw something funny and commented on it etc. The willingness depends on the woman. Tactical assumption: all women want it. Your options are open so play the field and have fun. Let us know how it goes.

[Saweeep]

I can't think of anything worse than meeting a girl either in the daytime or at a coffee shop.

Maybe it's just me but I find 99.9% of them boring at the best of times.

Drinks at night or nothing is my attitude.

[WestIndianArchie]

Smells a bit trollish, but

The veteran in me sees the main problems

If you want an active sex life, you need a lot of chicks in your pipeline.
This particular pipeline has a lot of problems.

1) How do you get the volume?

- online - these are strangers and unless your in person game is good, you're going to waste time. (but it's not a true waste, as you develop your in person skills)

- day game/social circle - a little better for overall conversion. But both of those pools are limited. Day game just doesn't have the volume and concentration of girls that night game has. Social circle of the typical guy is small, and if you're asking this question, probably smaller than that.

if you can manage 2-3 dates a week like this (very doable in a big city, and you work downtown), this can work - but the problem is usually that even though the girls like your profile - you haven't really passed the smell test.

Night game, you get real time feedback on your sexual chances. Blind dating requires a rapid amount of getting comfortable before attraction can even take place.

2) She agrees to coffee

- the caffeine will make her sharp, which means your verbal skills better be up to par

- you can turn it into a walking date as suggested above, but it doesn't sound like you're clearing your schedule to make the afternoon date bleed into an evening date and then into night time

- you have to build up enough attraction that she wants to see you again, but not so much that when she comes down, she "snaps" out of it.

A lot of game is about stacking the deck to make a chick do something impulsive, make her act on her urges and hormones. For some guys, it's not so much about how attractive and cool they are, but they spotted a DTF girl, or they put a chick in a DTF mood.

They've become the dating equivalent of after hours pizza. Clubs let out, nom noms hit, and you'll eat anything.

Just because you're hungry, doesn't mean you really love the food. That's the case with a lot of night game one night stands, particularly with young hotties. (in the West that is)

This scenario is different.

If you've got a chick during the day and you have to heat her up, and then put her in a thermos for a couple more days - she has to feel something for you.

Not saying she has to fall in love, but she has to be so intrigued that she can't wait to see you again.

To make this thing work like this
- you need stellar game
- great personality

Are they one in the same? I dunno. I'm sure that I could convert a fair amount of coffee dates, but that's cause I believe my own bullshit (and track record). As soon as I talk to a girl, I'll start catching her conscious and unconscious cues - and i'll focus on those.

Do you have that kind of game? Do you notice a chick's micro-reactions and body language when you talk to her, when you touch her?

For an intermediate player, chances are good.

For a newb player, he has to develop those through trial and error.

How you hook a chick at a coffee shop and get her dying to see you is not something that I think has been committed to paper yet.

3) Let's say the player does put the chick on the hook

She invested a bit.
He got compliance.
They exchanged pleasantries.

He managed to get a smooch out of it (the lingering hug at the end of the coffee date in the parking lot, where he kisses her - as if it were the end of a night)

She's on cloud nine, so is he.

But now he has to fight with her schedule.

If she's REALLY into him, she'll clear her schedule.
If she's just into him, he'd better double book that night, at a spot where he can easily pull another chick.

4) the dinner date has to change pace and end up in sex - and a lot of chicks will say "mixed signals" - which is bullshit - but the logic of it is very seductive to would be players.

For a veteran, and if you have a little bit of coin - this is actually fine. I'm in no rush to fuck any particular bitch nowadays cause my needs are met, and I like being able to dismiss a chick for being lame. Broad can think whatever she wants, when I sit down at the table, I already have plenty of options. I'm never pressed.

A newb typically doesn't have the stable or the skillset. So all this hemming and hawing over the pussy, makes him more desperate, less cool under fire - which makes him overall less attractive.

You really got to be ready to walk with these chicks. Not as some gambit to make her want you, but because these chicks can truly waste your time.

____________________________

So
- he needs to have a lot of chicks in the pipeline
- he needs to really shine during the date
- he needs to get her back out on the date

OP picked a good target market, as those chicks
- love coffee dates/brunch dates - no pressure to fuck,
- but there also going to scrutinize the shit out of you.

I would have no problem with this, cause all things considered I'm a good "catch". If a chick is looking for a husband and a guy who wants kids, educated, professional, gainfully employed, funny, yadda yadda yadda - I'm that guy.

But as players we know that we don't want to be Mr. Right, we want to be Mr. Right Now. I'll turn in the jersey for the right chick, but the right chick doesn't exist.

And that's the hidden danger of this low key approach.

She can genuinely like a guy like this, and want something more than just sex.

That's the danger of all game, but you're cranking up this risk with such a woman-friendly approach.

WIA

(07-25-2015 01:23 PM)h5757 Wrote:  

All the pickup material that I’ve read only mentions having dates in the evening or at night. My schedule makes it extremely hard to have evening dates and dates on the weekdays, so I was thinking of doing an afternoon date on the weekend. Also, I have no experience going on actual dates because I’ve only hooked up with women in the past (during college). I’m in my late 20s and looking to date women in their late 20s to late 30s, if that matters.

How plausible is an early or late afternoon coffee date on the weekend for a first date (starting anywhere from around 2-5pm)? What are the pros and cons? What are obstacles that I’ll face?

I’m guessing it’s less effective than an evening date, but could it still allow me to escalate and eventually lead to sex (a few dates down the road)? I was thinking of doing a coffee date after lunchtime on Saturday or Sunday (around 2-5pm). After that, I’d set up a dinner date for the next week.

Also, do you think a woman would be willing to kiss me in the parking lot during the daytime after I walk her back to her car? Would it be a bad idea? Where could we kiss? Or should we just hug at the end of the date since it’s during the daytime?

I’m pretty sure having an afternoon coffee date for a first date isn’t the most effective idea, but I’m wondering if it’s doable and can lead to a kiss or at least future dates where I can kiss her in the evening after dinner.

How should I approach this? How can I make this work?

[OregonToSoCal]

@WIA you never cease to blow me away. This could be your most epic post ever. I'll be going through this over and over like an archaeologist pouring over the Dead Sea scrolls.

[WestIndianArchie]

@Oregon

I think of this one as a bit of a throwaway post. It could use some revision for clarity and flow.

I have no problem rattling off an easy question like this, but something bigger I can't seem to wrap my head around because the answer isn't that clear.

I guess the terms aren't as defined.

At the onset, game is basically a bunch of tricks and hacks for the newb. Once you get success and internalize those tips, it shifts to more of personality and change in outlook. The tricks, structure, and little gambits don't seem to be necessary.

Results wise, by going off script I'm guessing that I probably am losing bangs. But I feel better about it.

I gotta strain myself to get in your pants? But you're lame. I see that your talons hang over those expensive heels, and you barely have anything to say because you don't let yourself live. If I spend my time with a chick like that, it's basically a one way exchange. She's not making my life better, she's distracting me, from my purpose or at least a better girl.

I've been circling that sort of thing for what seems to be years now. Not anything that others haven't experienced.

This game thing can be so much better, I hope and believe

WIA

[Speculation]

As a quick aside and something to consider; amongst other effects caffeine can cause/exacerbate anxiety. If she seems nervous/high strung or the like, you might want to reconsider the coffee as it will put her more on edge.

I know because I've found out I'm sensitive to caffeine. I'm going to cut it out so I feel more comfortable on dates (and via the magic of emotional transference, so will she).

[evilbuttmunch]

I've been doing a lot of coffee dates with girls I meet online and they seem to work pretty well for me to get second dates out of, but the women will typically tell me after date 2 or 3 that they were never really feeling any chemistry. I've chalked this up to mistakes escalating on date 2 rather than date 1. I'm only dating 5s and 6s though so it may be harder to get more attractive women out a second time. I have a hard time speaking while walking, but if you sit me down face to face I can be interesting for 2-3 hours before the conversation starts to wane. I usually let them go around an hour before I announce that I have to go and we usually speak for another fifteen minutes or so. It's funny, sometimes the girl thinks she's losing you and makes an effort to hold on. If I run out of shit to say then it's because she's boring and not picking up on any conversational cues, and I know right then that I should bail on date 2.

I use the following tricks/scripts... I show up early and read a book to get myself comfortable in the space. This will also make it so that you can save the best table (secluded, out of the sun, comfortable seats) when you eventually need to get up to walk to the counter when she arrives. After an initial greeting and hug, I usually say something like "Are you going to let me buy you a coffee?" and I touch her for the second time as I lead her there to get over any sort of awkwardness on her part. We sit back down and when the drink is made, I get it for her, sometimes touching on the way to the counter if we're not awkwardly placed and again when I hand her the drink.

My biggest hurdle with coffee dates is that you often sit across from her and it gets hard to escalate physically. By no means should you ever stand up in your seat to close the distance. I freaked a woman out once by doing that. I will usually ask a girl her background and start talking about family/growing up as a way to initiate touch. So I usually compare arm color with a girl since I usually seem to date women who are Irish and usually pretty pale. Or last week I went on a date and was talking about the nuance of having to hold a string on an acoustic guitar to get the right sound out so I demonstrated on her hand.

Like WIA says, the major con is that you must be a great match for this girl. If you don't escalate physically to at least comfortable touching she will think you don't have any chemistry (even as she makes no effort to bridge the gap herself - women are immensely illogical). Most women who do online dating have ridiculous standards or are looking for a guy with a particular look and if you made it this far and pass the smell test you'll likely get a second date, especially if you frame it like this was just a quick meetup to see if she's who she said she was. Still, she'll forget you pretty quickly as soon as the next guy messages her, so try to make date 2 only a few days later, esp since your coffee date will be short. I usually wait too long, say a week, and have been hinted at by multiple women that "you seem extremely busy." I think their interest starts to wane before this point. They're intrigued that you're a busy, popular guy but it's counterproductive. I'm also no longer afraid to send out feeler texts only a few hours later by making a joke about something we talked about rather than wasting my time thinking they're into me. Still, you're probably asking out women who you met in person so take this with a grain of salt.

[robreke]

(07-25-2015 01:23 PM)h5757 Wrote:  

All the pickup material that I’ve read only mentions having dates in the evening or at night. My schedule makes it extremely hard to have evening dates and dates on the weekdays, so I was thinking of doing an afternoon date on the weekend. Also, I have no experience going on actual dates because I’ve only hooked up with women in the past (during college). I’m in my late 20s and looking to date women in their late 20s to late 30s, if that matters.

How plausible is an early or late afternoon coffee date on the weekend for a first date (starting anywhere from around 2-5pm)? What are the pros and cons? What are obstacles that I’ll face?

I’m guessing it’s less effective than an evening date, but could it still allow me to escalate and eventually lead to sex (a few dates down the road)? I was thinking of doing a coffee date after lunchtime on Saturday or Sunday (around 2-5pm). After that, I’d set up a dinner date for the next week.

Also, do you think a woman would be willing to kiss me in the parking lot during the daytime after I walk her back to her car? Would it be a bad idea? Where could we kiss? Or should we just hug at the end of the date since it’s during the daytime?

I’m pretty sure having an afternoon coffee date for a first date isn’t the most effective idea, but I’m wondering if it’s doable and can lead to a kiss or at least future dates where I can kiss her in the evening after dinner.

How should I approach this? How can I make this work?

Isolate and inebriate.

[heavy]

WIA obviously explains the root concerns. My input would be if you do decide to go on the day dates...

Have something to do after the coffee date, either really quick or can take a while, where she could potentially go along with you. If she's busy and doesn't want to, oh well, you at least have an errand to run to get your mind off the rejection.

The delivery should be slow and paced, reading her feedback. I would mix it in to the conversation...don't drop it at the end:
- "I'm gonna go buy the best cider in America...if you have cowboy boots you should come along...it's at a farm." (more rural less urban setting, she rides with you)
- "There's a pretty sweet 2nd hand store around the corner...I need to check out...how's your sense of style?" (bigger city)

For me, the key is to project a slight sense of sarcasm...like push/pull being built in to one statement. There's ambiguity, and she's trying to figure out if you actually want her to come along or not. She's not even entirely sure you are going to run the errand. It's like trolling. But in your mind, it's sincere. You have every intention of going to that 2nd hand store.

Your delivery must be slow, with pauses, drawn out. Rhythmic with inflection. Don't smirk, but almost smirk while you say it.

You must have actual plans, for instance, of visiting the 2nd hand store. Women will get in the way of your workouts, making money, meeting buddies for beers, golf...this is a first step in sticking to plans. That's the first reason. The second reason is that most guys aren't natural liars. Your focus should be on reading her and her body language, not fooling her.

If she responds positively (yes or curious maybe), you've primed her for when you leave. Tell her to come along in a playful having fun way. If she rejects you, oh well, at least you gave her the option.

This is a version of my ambiguous game I talk about here. This is my standard go to...I should probably expand my game, but it seems to work.

[CH-Toronto]

A lot of good advice in this thread.

A weekend coffee date during the day I would almost consider a good thing. You made it to a qualifying round- where there is no presumptuous guarantee of anything more.

[WalterBlack]

I stopped doing afternoon coffee dates a long time ago. I feel that they tend not to lead anywhere. There was one occasion where I message a Korean-American SIF on OKC at around 1pm, we met at a coffee place 4pm, chatted for an hour and I banged her at my place by 6pm.

I do do coffee dates, but they’re always an evening thing for me now, the later the better. I try to meet near my place, and once the place closes we sit in her car and I try to make out with her and escalate from there.

[OregonToSoCal]

^How do you get around the inevitable 'it's too late in the day for coffee' objection most women give?

[presidentcarter]

(11-03-2015 09:51 PM)OregonToSoCal Wrote:  

^How do you get around the inevitable 'it's too late in the day for coffee' objection most women give?

Tea.

[Dr. Howard]

(11-03-2015 08:54 PM)WalterBlack Wrote:  

I stopped doing afternoon coffee dates a long time ago. I feel that they tend not to lead anywhere. There was one occasion where I message a Korean-American SIF on OKC at around 1pm, we met at a coffee place 4pm, chatted for an hour and I banged her at my place by 6pm.

I do do coffee dates, but they’re always an evening thing for me now, the later the better. I try to meet near my place, and once the place closes we sit in her car and I try to make out with her and escalate from there.

genius! Going to somewhere that you know is going to close after an hour of your arrival forces a venue change or allows you to eject with 'it was nice meeting you'

[WalterBlack]

(11-03-2015 09:51 PM)OregonToSoCal Wrote:  

^How do you get around the inevitable 'it's too late in the day for coffee' objection most women give?

I’ve never had that happen to be honest with you. A lot of the women I meet tend to be east-Asian, and a lot of them do not drink at all, or are light drinkers. As for women of other races, it’s about 50/50 where they want to grab a drink or a coffee. I’m fine either way.

My tactics for getting bangs have never been about getting women to drink alcohol. I’m in Los Angeles and until very recently (because of Uber, Lyft) most women would never have more than 2 drinks. There’s a lounge within walking distance of my place. I’ll drink as much as I want with the woman. If I feel the vibe is good, I may give her a very short kiss in the lounge. Because I live close by, they’ll drop me off outside of my apartment…I always ask them in, most of the time they say “not yet”, or sometimes they say “next time”. The “next time” will almost certainly lead to a bang on the second meet.

(11-04-2015 11:10 AM)Dr. Howard Wrote:  

genius! Going to somewhere that you know is going to close after an hour of your arrival forces a venue change or allows you to eject with 'it was nice meeting you'

Exactly – it’s all about ease of exit or escalation with the least amount of money spent!

If I want to be really cheap, I get there 5-10 min late on purpose…usually when I arrive she’s sitting there with a coffee that she bought for herself - I never even needed to pay anything! I’ve got “zero cost” bangs before!

The coffee places I’ve had most success with were actually not walking distance from my apartment. There’s a lot of Starbucks located in big shopping plazas. When they close at 10pm, the whole area is deserted so there’s a lot more “privacy” with you and the woman – so it’s possible to escalate. If it’s cold, sit in a car and escalate. I’ve had meetings at a Starbucks in Culver City off the 405 (now unfortunately closed), where I would end up making out with the woman in the car, and get her so excited she drives 20 mins back to my place to get banged.

With bars I have to be careful. I’m not taking any sides in the Apps debate, but I straight up say to the woman I’m here to drink, not to eat. If she wants to get an app, I’m fine with that, but usually they’ll only order drinks.

I never go for dinner on a first meet, that’s a massive waste of time and money if we’re not feeling each other.

[OregonToSoCal]

(11-04-2015 01:20 PM)WalterBlack Wrote:  

I’ve never had that happen to be honest with you. A lot of the women I meet tend to be east-Asian, and a lot of them do not drink at all, or are light drinkers. As for women of other races, it’s about 50/50 where they want to grab a drink or a coffee. I’m fine either way.

Good stuff, I'm going to experiment with that. I'll pitch it as let's meet for a Starbucks and if they say it's too late for coffee I'll counter with that they can get tea or a hot chocolate.

[Dr. Howard]

(11-04-2015 01:20 PM)WalterBlack Wrote:  

(11-03-2015 09:51 PM)OregonToSoCal Wrote:  

^How do you get around the inevitable 'it's too late in the day for coffee' objection most women give?

I’ve never had that happen to be honest with you. A lot of the women I meet tend to be east-Asian, and a lot of them do not drink at all, or are light drinkers. As for women of other races, it’s about 50/50 where they want to grab a drink or a coffee. I’m fine either way.

My tactics for getting bangs have never been about getting women to drink alcohol. I’m in Los Angeles and until very recently (because of Uber, Lyft) most women would never have more than 2 drinks. There’s a lounge within walking distance of my place. I’ll drink as much as I want with the woman. If I feel the vibe is good, I may give her a very short kiss in the lounge. Because I live close by, they’ll drop me off outside of my apartment…I always ask them in, most of the time they say “not yet”, or sometimes they say “next time”. The “next time” will almost certainly lead to a bang on the second meet.

(11-04-2015 11:10 AM)Dr. Howard Wrote:  

genius! Going to somewhere that you know is going to close after an hour of your arrival forces a venue change or allows you to eject with 'it was nice meeting you'

Exactly – it’s all about ease of exit or escalation with the least amount of money spent!

If I want to be really cheap, I get there 5-10 min late on purpose…usually when I arrive she’s sitting there with a coffee that she bought for herself - I never even needed to pay anything! I’ve got “zero cost” bangs before!

The coffee places I’ve had most success with were actually not walking distance from my apartment. There’s a lot of Starbucks located in big shopping plazas. When they close at 10pm, the whole area is deserted so there’s a lot more “privacy” with you and the woman – so it’s possible to escalate. If it’s cold, sit in a car and escalate. I’ve had meetings at a Starbucks in Culver City off the 405 (now unfortunately closed), where I would end up making out with the woman in the car, and get her so excited she drives 20 mins back to my place to get banged.

With bars I have to be careful. I’m not taking any sides in the Apps debate, but I straight up say to the woman I’m here to drink, not to eat. If she wants to get an app, I’m fine with that, but usually they’ll only order drinks.


I never go for dinner on a first meet, that’s a massive waste of time and money if we’re not feeling each other.

[~wrIghter~]

I've actually been working on this with my 18 yr old lead (ikr). So far I've seen good IoIs and she mentioned that she's free this weekend. I asked if Friday worked as the rest of the weekend is likely to be bad weather wise but haven't heard anything back yet. As far as first dates go, I've only come close to a SNL once. With a coffee date I'd have to get creative.

A lot of good posts in this thread for reference but I often find myself SOL with online chicks.