[BlurredSevens]

Intro

When I first started in the game, my ideal was to have a harem of girls I could bang on demand. I know a lot of guys on the forum want to achieve this as well – newbies, beginners, and intermediate players alike. It's a worthy goal and I can confidently say that sexual variety is something that keeps me satiated.

Most players know what a harem is, and have discussed its benefits, but there isn't much actionable info for how to go out and build one.

Today I can boast that I've built and maintained various harems that have lasted many months. I hesitate to say I've "cracked the code," because game is intensely personal and conditional, but I know that whatever I'm doing is working, so I want to share my experience with the forum.

I'm not going to claim my way is the best way, and I'm not claiming it's the only way. I'm just presenting an approach that works for me, and hopefully some of you will be able to benefit from what I've learned.

Maybe it will work for you too!

-----

Defining modern harems:

My definition of a harem member: a girl you've banged 3+ times over a minimum of 30 days, who hasn't tried to define the relationship.

*If the relationship is less than 30 days old, it's still just a fling, regardless of how many times you've banged.

*If she tries to define the relationship at any point, then she's not on the team and things will soon end.

The reason these things are true are because no girl will fuck a man for over a month that she's not dating, unless she has accepted being a harem member, consciously or otherwise.

It goes without saying that you need to maintain at least 3 girls for it to be considered a harem.

-----

I view harem girls as fuck buddies who've decided to join my team. Despite all the options out there, they like what I've got to offer, and neither of us have any misconceptions about what is going down or why.

As of today, I've got 7 girls in my harem. That means that I've got a reliable stable of 7 girls who I can fuck whenever I want to, and who I've been fucking for over a month or more. I can stop writing this and send one of them a text, and she'll be over my place in a few hours.

A large part of building up to this point is consistently adding new girls, so I never really stop chasing new pussy. I consider chasing new pussy as a process of interviewing new girls for the team. Some girls get banged once and then dropped.

Others simply aren't interested in playing for me after the first bang. Such is life, and we all move on.

-----

Actions > Words

The key to getting a girl on your team is using actions instead of words. If you ask a girl to join your team, it won't work, because now you're trying to define the relationship, which is breaking the conditional definition of a harem.

Instead, you have to show her that you are not interested in a traditional relationship with her. Most guys want to blurt out some offer to the girl, but this kills the entire vibe. The relationship needs to be implied and not spoken.

You must show intent, not speak it.

Many girls have never had such relationships before, but you will be surprised by which girls are comfortable being your occasional fuck buddy. I know I am.

-----

Running the Relationship in Reverse

A lot of girls say: "I don't fuck on the first date"
And I always say: "I don't date girls I haven't fucked"

In my mind, harems are the strongest relationship type that exists in the modern dating world. Or in my world, at least. It puts attraction and sex at the forefront, which means priorities are lined up correctly from day one. You are showing her what your interests are.

Girls know every guys wants to fuck them, which is "creepy," but the subtlety here is that you have built attraction with her and she's comfortable entertaining the idea of only getting railed by you. That's hot and sexy to her. But it's a thin line to walk.

So that brings us to….

Step #1: You MUST fuck her the first time you meet her.

This one is pretty obvious: you can't be fuck buddies with a girl you're not banging!

But beyond that, if you're not fucking her, then you're sending the wrong message.

The sex should be aggressive and passionate. You should be throat fucking these girls, dominating them, throwing them around your bed. It should be fun, crazy, animalistic sex.

You want her to see and understand what your intentions are. You can't spell them out for her, so you need to show her what's up. Which is: that you find her sexy, and you want to own her body and her entire being. Chicks love this shit and they want it, so you have to show them you're the one to give it to them. Win-win.


Step #2: Fuck her as fast as possible.

Personally, I run Zero Date Bangs on every girl that I want to add to my team.

Why?

Well, if you take a girl on a date for the first meet, you're sending her the wrong message. You're showing her, with your actions, that you want to build a traditional relationship with her. Every guy she's ever dated, and that her friends, sisters, and roommates have dated, all started out by going on a traditional date.

That's cool if you're looking to lock down a nice girl for the winter, but if you're building a harem, it's a backward approach.

Perhaps my analysis is wrong, and I'm open to critique here, but my success has always hinged on fast sex during the first meet.


Step #3: Invest minimally in the first meet

The first time you meet her, your only job is to fuck her. No theatrics, no cute date spots, no making dinner together. Just get drunk and fuck.

This seems crude, but it positively sets the frame of the relationship in stone, and it sets you up nicely for the next step:


Step #4: Invest substantially in the second meet

This is where things get interesting. This is where she's in brand new territory. This is where emotional game and harem building starts.

For the second meetup, I take the girl on a nice date. I'll drop cash on a fancy night on the town – tell her to wear heels and I'll be dressed sharp. Or I'll make her a gourmet dinner from scratch. Or I'll take her to a concert. Or I'll let her into my life by sharing intimate photos and stories about my past, allowing her to see my passions and to see what makes me tick.

And it's all real at this point: no games, just me being me and connecting with her on a deeper level.

The purpose of investing on the second meet is to show the girl that I'm invested in her, that I like her, and that I'm not just in it for the sex. I'm letting her know that I find her to be a quality girl, and that we'd both be better off hitched together for a minute.

---

Every girl has been on first dates with guys. And, most girls have had a one night stand with a different guy. But how many have been on a nice date with a guy, after he banged her out on the first meet?

That's why I do it, and that's why I think it works.

Taking a girl on a date after you've fucked her silly shocks her system. It shakes her tree. It surprises her. This is base level emotional game. She doesn't know what's going to happen next, and this rocks her world.

Congratulations, because you're now different than any other guy she's ever met.


Step #5: Rinse & Repeat

At this point I simply repeat Steps #3 and #4 until she fades or until I lose interest.

Meetup #3 should be getting drunk and banging. It should be a booty call.
Meetup #4 should be a date
Meetup #5 should be a booty call
Meetup #6 should be a date

etc.

You can and should begin to experiment after meetups 3 and 4 (8 a.m. bangs, sex in public, etc.), but don't blow it by forgetting that she's a harem member and not a girlfriend. That is to say, don't make it seem like you're falling for her. Keep the frame and the girl will keep coming back for more. Girls will love the consistent variety, surprise, and spontaneity you bring to their lives.

But, most importantly, she'll love you for the fact that you can fuck her like a slut without making her feel like a slut. It's a thing of beauty, really. To fuck her senseless but leave her in a positive emotional state. That's the nucleus of the harem: slutty hot sex, emotional support, and fun non-judgmental interactions.

All of this done without words.

Imagine that!

-----

Results:

If you are playing things right, you won't have jealous girls, they won't shit test you, they won't flake on you, they won't expect you to do nice shit for them, they won't throw tantrums, and more than anything, you'll genuinely enjoy banging and spending time with them.

-----

Timeline Cheat Sheet – Harem Management:

How I handle all my girls, starting with whenever it is we first bang:

Day 1: Bang
Day 2: Follow up on bang, suggest meeting up again sometime
Day 7: Text her, suggest meeting up the following week
Day 14: Date + rebang
Day 15: Follow up on bang, suggest meeting up again sometime

Rinse & Repeat. I keep a MINIMUM of 1 week between all meetups. Ideally I keep 2 weeks between bangs, and after the 3rd meet, I keep around 3 weeks or more in between bangs.

-----

Q&A:

I'm going to preempt some questions you guys are probably thinking of asking:

1. How much communication do you have with the girls in between bangs?

I keep texting to a minimum, unless she wants to chat, in which case I'm happy to oblige.

I also sometimes connect with these girls on instagram so she can see what I'm up to. Builds a bit of mystery about what I'm doing, and let's her know I've got a life outside her.

I will also, once every 2 weeks or so, text her a picture of something interesting going on in my life. Pictures from trips and adventures, etc.

--

2. Aren't you worried about losing the girl by waiting so long in between meetups?

It's never, ever been an issue.

In fact, I think it works to benefit the relationship. By seeing her infrequently, it creates more intense interactions and allows me to be present in the situation with her when we do meet. 2-3 weeks is just long enough that she hasn't forgotten about me, but it prevents her from getting used to me too.

Often I wait longer than 3 weeks just to see if she can handle it. They'll hit me up because they want to get fucked and they get worried I forgot about them.

--

3. Do they ever ask you about other girls?

I've never once been asked if I'm seeing other girls. They probably assume I am, but they're smart enough not to ask. One girl teased me about it once, saying "I bet you're seeing tons of other girls" but this was easily deflected with agree & amplify.

I also don't ask if they're seeing other guys. I don't really care one way or the other. That's her deal not mine. As long as she is present with me during our interactions, then the rest is gravy.

--

4. Do you lie or mislead girls?

I used to think that maintaining a harem was all about manipulation, secrets, lies, etc. But in reality I just go with the flow. Most interactions follow the "don't ask don't tell" protocol, which eliminates the need to manipulate, lie or cheat.

It just is.

I take her out, we bang, she goes home, then we do it again.

-----

No judgement, no questions, and a perfectly balanced relationship fit for the modern world.

Show your intent with actions, and the rest will follow.

Good luck!

[The_e_man]

Nice data sheet. I've organically come to a lot of the same conclusions as you when I was ironing the kinks out of building a harem.
It's funny because in my beta days I learned game so I can find the right girl and be able to keep her. Now I use my "powers" of game to maintain harems of bad bitches

[realologist]

BlurredSevens

I know you mentioned that you consider a harem 3+ girls that you regularly fuck which I agree with.

Do you think there is a cap on this where the amount of girls becomes too much to manage?

I have always had a view that there shouldn't be more than 5 girls on a harem. Otherwise it becomes too much to manage.

Another view I take it to look at it like a basketball team.

First you have the star player. That girl is the one you actually may like and enjoy spending time with other than fucking. You spend the most time with her.

The other 4 starters(harem girls) come 2nd to the star but all have their role to play which is sex atleast a few times a month.

The next 3 are bench players that come into the game. I consider these the girls still have a role and that's once a month for sex. That's all these girls are worth.

The next 4 girls to round out a 12 girl team are the never used bench players. These girls are your team for desperation when your starters and other bench players are injured and are only uses in rare cases. I say every 3-6 months but they are always ready to play.

[Mujeriego]

I disagree about having to fuck them on the first date. Most of my new pussy comes on the first date, but I'd be giving up bangs if I that's all I limited myself to. Some girls you end up having to "slow roll" for one reason or another. I call them back burner girls. The girls that are down to fuck or are new prospects always go to the front of the line.

[robreke]

(05-30-2015 05:26 PM)BlurredSevens Wrote:  

Intro

When I first started in the game, my ideal was to have a harem of girls I could bang on demand. I know a lot of guys on the forum want to achieve this as well – newbies, beginners, and intermediate players alike. It's a worthy goal and I can confidently say that sexual variety is something that keeps me satiated.

Most players know what a harem is, and have discussed its benefits, but there isn't much actionable info for how to go out and build one.

Today I can boast that I've built and maintained various harems that have lasted many months. I hesitate to say I've "cracked the code," because game is intensely personal and conditional, but I know that whatever I'm doing is working, so I want to share my experience with the forum.

I'm not going to claim my way is the best way, and I'm not claiming it's the only way. I'm just presenting an approach that works for me, and hopefully some of you will be able to benefit from what I've learned.

Maybe it will work for you too!

-----

Defining modern harems:

My definition of a harem member: a girl you've banged 3+ times over a minimum of 30 days, who hasn't tried to define the relationship.

*If the relationship is less than 30 days old, it's still just a fling, regardless of how many times you've banged.

*If she tries to define the relationship at any point, then she's not on the team and things will soon end.

The reason these things are true are because no girl will fuck a man for over a month that she's not dating, unless she has accepted being a harem member, consciously or otherwise.

It goes without saying that you need to maintain at least 3 girls for it to be considered a harem.

-----

I view harem girls as fuck buddies who've decided to join my team. Despite all the options out there, they like what I've got to offer, and neither of us have any misconceptions about what is going down or why.

As of today, I've got 7 girls in my harem. That means that I've got a reliable stable of 7 girls who I can fuck whenever I want to, and who I've been fucking for over a month or more. I can stop writing this and send one of them a text, and she'll be over my place in a few hours.

A large part of building up to this point is consistently adding new girls, so I never really stop chasing new pussy. I consider chasing new pussy as a process of interviewing new girls for the team. Some girls get banged once and then dropped.

Others simply aren't interested in playing for me after the first bang. Such is life, and we all move on.

-----

Actions > Words

The key to getting a girl on your team is using actions instead of words. If you ask a girl to join your team, it won't work, because now you're trying to define the relationship, which is breaking the conditional definition of a harem.

Instead, you have to show her that you are not interested in a traditional relationship with her. Most guys want to blurt out some offer to the girl, but this kills the entire vibe. The relationship needs to be implied and not spoken.

You must show intent, not speak it.

Many girls have never had such relationships before, but you will be surprised by which girls are comfortable being your occasional fuck buddy. I know I am.

-----

Running the Relationship in Reverse

A lot of girls say: "I don't fuck on the first date"
And I always say: "I don't date girls I haven't fucked"

In my mind, harems are the strongest relationship type that exists in the modern dating world. Or in my world, at least. It puts attraction and sex at the forefront, which means priorities are lined up correctly from day one. You are showing her what your interests are.

Girls know every guys wants to fuck them, which is "creepy," but the subtlety here is that you have built attraction with her and she's comfortable entertaining the idea of only getting railed by you. That's hot and sexy to her. But it's a thin line to walk.

So that brings us to….

Step #1: You MUST fuck her the first time you meet her.

This one is pretty obvious: you can't be fuck buddies with a girl you're not banging!

But beyond that, if you're not fucking her, then you're sending the wrong message.

The sex should be aggressive and passionate. You should be throat fucking these girls, dominating them, throwing them around your bed. It should be fun, crazy, animalistic sex.

You want her to see and understand what your intentions are. You can't spell them out for her, so you need to show her what's up. Which is: that you find her sexy, and you want to own her body and her entire being. Chicks love this shit and they want it, so you have to show them you're the one to give it to them. Win-win.


Step #2: Fuck her as fast as possible.

Personally, I run Zero Date Bangs on every girl that I want to add to my team.

Why?

Well, if you take a girl on a date for the first meet, you're sending her the wrong message. You're showing her, with your actions, that you want to build a traditional relationship with her. Every guy she's ever dated, and that her friends, sisters, and roommates have dated, all started out by going on a traditional date.

That's cool if you're looking to lock down a nice girl for the winter, but if you're building a harem, it's a backward approach.

Perhaps my analysis is wrong, and I'm open to critique here, but my success has always hinged on fast sex during the first meet.


Step #3: Invest minimally in the first meet

The first time you meet her, your only job is to fuck her. No theatrics, no cute date spots, no making dinner together. Just get drunk and fuck.

This seems crude, but it positively sets the frame of the relationship in stone, and it sets you up nicely for the next step:


Step #4: Invest substantially in the second meet

This is where things get interesting. This is where she's in brand new territory. This is where emotional game and harem building starts.

For the second meetup, I take the girl on a nice date. I'll drop cash on a fancy night on the town – tell her to wear heels and I'll be dressed sharp. Or I'll make her a gourmet dinner from scratch. Or I'll take her to a concert. Or I'll let her into my life by sharing intimate photos and stories about my past, allowing her to see my passions and to see what makes me tick.

And it's all real at this point: no games, just me being me and connecting with her on a deeper level.

The purpose of investing on the second meet is to show the girl that I'm invested in her, that I like her, and that I'm not just in it for the sex. I'm letting her know that I find her to be a quality girl, and that we'd both be better off hitched together for a minute.

---

Every girl has been on first dates with guys. And, most girls have had a one night stand with a different guy. But how many have been on a nice date with a guy, after he banged her out on the first meet?

That's why I do it, and that's why I think it works.

Taking a girl on a date after you've fucked her silly shocks her system. It shakes her tree. It surprises her. This is base level emotional game. She doesn't know what's going to happen next, and this rocks her world.

Congratulations, because you're now different than any other guy she's ever met.


Step #5: Rinse & Repeat

At this point I simply repeat Steps #3 and #4 until she fades or until I lose interest.

Meetup #3 should be getting drunk and banging. It should be a booty call.
Meetup #4 should be a date
Meetup #5 should be a booty call
Meetup #6 should be a date

etc.

You can and should begin to experiment after meetups 3 and 4 (8 a.m. bangs, sex in public, etc.), but don't blow it by forgetting that she's a harem member and not a girlfriend. That is to say, don't make it seem like you're falling for her. Keep the frame and the girl will keep coming back for more. Girls will love the consistent variety, surprise, and spontaneity you bring to their lives.

But, most importantly, she'll love you for the fact that you can fuck her like a slut without making her feel like a slut. It's a thing of beauty, really. To fuck her senseless but leave her in a positive emotional state. That's the nucleus of the harem: slutty hot sex, emotional support, and fun non-judgmental interactions.

All of this done without words.

Imagine that!

-----

Results:

If you are playing things right, you won't have jealous girls, they won't shit test you, they won't flake on you, they won't expect you to do nice shit for them, they won't throw tantrums, and more than anything, you'll genuinely enjoy banging and spending time with them.

-----

Timeline Cheat Sheet – Harem Management:

How I handle all my girls, starting with whenever it is we first bang:

Day 1: Bang
Day 2: Follow up on bang, suggest meeting up again sometime
Day 7: Text her, suggest meeting up the following week
Day 14: Date + rebang
Day 15: Follow up on bang, suggest meeting up again sometime

Rinse & Repeat. I keep a MINIMUM of 1 week between all meetups. Ideally I keep 2 weeks between bangs, and after the 3rd meet, I keep around 3 weeks or more in between bangs.

-----

Q&A:

I'm going to preempt some questions you guys are probably thinking of asking:

1. How much communication do you have with the girls in between bangs?

I keep texting to a minimum, unless she wants to chat, in which case I'm happy to oblige.

I also sometimes connect with these girls on instagram so she can see what I'm up to. Builds a bit of mystery about what I'm doing, and let's her know I've got a life outside her.

I will also, once every 2 weeks or so, text her a picture of something interesting going on in my life. Pictures from trips and adventures, etc.

--

2. Aren't you worried about losing the girl by waiting so long in between meetups?

It's never, ever been an issue.

In fact, I think it works to benefit the relationship. By seeing her infrequently, it creates more intense interactions and allows me to be present in the situation with her when we do meet. 2-3 weeks is just long enough that she hasn't forgotten about me, but it prevents her from getting used to me too.

Often I wait longer than 3 weeks just to see if she can handle it. They'll hit me up because they want to get fucked and they get worried I forgot about them.

--

3. Do they ever ask you about other girls?

I've never once been asked if I'm seeing other girls. They probably assume I am, but they're smart enough not to ask. One girl teased me about it once, saying "I bet you're seeing tons of other girls" but this was easily deflected with agree & amplify.

I also don't ask if they're seeing other guys. I don't really care one way or the other. That's her deal not mine. As long as she is present with me during our interactions, then the rest is gravy.

--

4. Do you lie or mislead girls?

I used to think that maintaining a harem was all about manipulation, secrets, lies, etc. But in reality I just go with the flow. Most interactions follow the "don't ask don't tell" protocol, which eliminates the need to manipulate, lie or cheat.

It just is.

I take her out, we bang, she goes home, then we do it again.

-----

No judgement, no questions, and a perfectly balanced relationship fit for the modern world.

Show your intent with actions, and the rest will follow.

Good luck!

Great post Blurred. This is going to help me. I especially like the part on the timeline you run.

Offshoot question to banging harem girls - do you always wrap up for your harem girls or take them on a case by case? Since you don't worry about if they're seeing other guys in between your bangs, I would tend to think you'd have a wrap it up policy.

[Apollo21]

Great post. Possibly the best I've read in a while.

I've got a girl like that. It's simple and no stress for her.

While most women do want exclusive relationships, there are women
who have their own busy lives and just want a little convenience
rather than invest all their time and energy into a relationship.

They don't want a boyfriend and they don't want a bunch of guys
either...just a cool guy friend who takes care of them and then leaves
in the morning after breakfast.

I don't necessarily agree though about having fast sex. This is still a relationship,
just with different expectations.

You're right though that traditional dating is the wrong approach.

For me it's all about qualification and engagement. It doesn't bother me
if I don't sleep with a girl the first night or meeting...I'm building a real relationship
and engaging girls who don't mind a more relaxed relationship.

The key is picking the right women in advance...so you can go pretty quickly
without having to rush everything on the first meeting.

[RDF]

This is a great post. A harem like this is probably the ideal situation for almost every young guy, and this post really breaks it down step by step. Good shit.

I'm most surprised when you say that girls rarely (if ever) ask you to become exclusive, or present you with any sorts of ultimatums. For me, it has happened, at some point or another, with every single girl that has entered my harem. Even if I'm running game similarly after the first bang (a mix of nicer dates and quick bangs, with a week or more in between), somehow every girl eventually ends up asking the "Where is this going?" question. After that, it will likely be over soon since I'm not going to commit. I'm thinking that the ZDB is the way to screen for that, since girls who are willing to come over to a guy's house and fuck them are usually not the types that want to lock down a guy as quickly. Do you think that's the reason that you don't get girls who want to lock you down? (ie: have girls who you banged after the rare first date been more clingy than ZDB girls)

[Akwesi]

Brilliant post, OP. This is making me rethink everything I thought I knew about harem management. Repped.

[BlurredSevens]

(05-30-2015 06:21 PM)realologist Wrote:  

Do you think there is a cap on this where the amount of girls becomes too much to manage?

Another view I take it to look at it like a basketball team.

The basketball team is a good analogy.

I think of it like a solar system.

I am the sun, and I've got various girls orbiting around me. Some come around very frequently, and some only come around once in a blue moon.

I think there is definitely an upper maximum for harem size though, because in order to chase new pussy you need a lot of free time.

If I spend a week banging harem girls, that's a week I'm not out meeting new girls.

So of course it is a balance. I think 3 regulars + 3 on the back burner is probably pretty ideal.

(05-30-2015 06:51 PM)Mujeriego Wrote:  

I disagree about having to fuck them on the first date. Most of my new pussy comes on the first date, but I'd be giving up bangs if I that's all I limited myself to. Some girls you end up having to "slow roll" for one reason or another. I call them back burner girls. The girls that are down to fuck or are new prospects always go to the front of the line.

Absolutely, I'm with you here. I don't think guys should ditch girls that don't bang on the first date.

However in my experience, the ones that stick around for the long term are the ones that are down to fuck quickly. I'm open to variance here though and I wouldn't preclude a girl from my harem for not having sex quickly.

(05-30-2015 07:03 PM)robreke Wrote:  

Offshoot question to banging harem girls - do you always wrap up for your harem girls or take them on a case by case? Since you don't worry about if they're seeing other guys in between your bangs, I would tend to think you'd have a wrap it up policy.

I take it case by case. I wouldn't want to draw a hard line rule in this regard, since every situation is a little bit different.

(05-30-2015 07:03 PM)Apollo21 Wrote:  

They don't want a boyfriend and they don't want a bunch of guys
either...just a cool guy friend who takes care of them and then leaves
in the morning after breakfast.

This is a great way to put it, and I think you're very much on point here.

One of the girls in my harem originally flaked on me because she "didn't have time to date."

Needless to say I convinced her to meet me anyway, and we've since been banging and occasionally going out on the town for the past 5 months. Usually about once every 3 weeks.

It's great for her, because unlike most girls who claim to be "really busy," this chick is working full time while going to nursing school, so she legitimately doesn't have more than a couple hours free each week.

The relationship I've setup is ideal for her, because she gets to go on dates and have fun sex without needing to sleep around, and without having to deal with a boyfriend.

(05-30-2015 08:05 PM)RDF Wrote:  

Do you think that's the reason that you don't get girls who want to lock you down? (ie: have girls who you banged after the rare first date been more clingy than ZDB girls)

ZDB vs. 3rd date bangs, for example, don't seem to have an affect on how clingy or not she becomes.

I think the reason has more to do with the timeline I work on.

By keeping a minimum of 1 week between when I see a particular girl, it sends the message that I'm not looking for a relationship. It also prevents either of us from catching strong feelings.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not some unemotional robot. In fact, quite the opposite. I've said it before that I fall in love 10 times a week.

I love women, so the only way for me to keep from going head over heels is to: 1. bang lots of different girls, 2. keep ample time in between meetups.

If I didn't do that, I'd certainly have fallen into a monogamous relationship by now.

[The Wire]

Awesome thread. I have a few questions;

1. Scale of 1-10 what level of girls are you able to get into the harlem? Also are you finding them in the same range as you are capable of getting 'normally' For example do you find you can get 7.5 or 8s for ONS or 'regular dating' but are getting 6s in your harlem?

2. How are you initially meeting these girls? Daygame, nightgame, online...etc

3. If you're getting compliance for them to come over and fuck you to begin with then why take them out the second time? Are you finding they get bored quicker and flake out if you keep it strictly sexual?

4. Are you leveraging something else as well for these girls to want to be your fuck buddy? Exceptional good looking? tall? or is this more of a game mentality that you are setting a sexual frame for these girls.

[Samseau]

Good stuff. The innovation in this thread Blurred has is this part:

Quote:

Timeline Cheat Sheet – Harem Management:

How I handle all my girls, starting with whenever it is we first bang:

Day 1: Bang
Day 2: Follow up on bang, suggest meeting up again sometime
Day 7: Text her, suggest meeting up the following week
Day 14: Date + rebang
Day 15: Follow up on bang, suggest meeting up again sometime

Rinse & Repeat. I keep a MINIMUM of 1 week between all meetups. Ideally I keep 2 weeks between bangs, and after the 3rd meet, I keep around 3 weeks or more in between bangs.

Extremely good strategy right here. Love the staggered meetups. I've had relationships like this in the past; starts intense with sporadic meetups. Works better if you or her have legit reasons to be apart, such as work or travel.

As for the rest -

Going for the bang ASAP is of course standard operating procedure. Good lines right here:

Quote:

A lot of girls say: "I don't fuck on the first date"
And I always say: "I don't date girls I haven't fucked"

But even if you cannot get the bang - remember, rape is a sin - it still lets her know you're a man with needs and aggression. 6 times out of 10 even if you cannot bang on the first go around, there's still a good chance of a second attempt. Of course, it's on you as the man to decide if it's worth it. If she's hot enough, of course, any sane man will accept defeat on the first time. But just because you've lost the battle, does not mean you've lost the war...

[BlurredSevens]

(05-31-2015 05:46 PM)The Wire Wrote:  

Awesome thread. I have a few questions;

1. Scale of 1-10 what level of girls are you able to get into the harlem? Also are you finding them in the same range as you are capable of getting 'normally' For example do you find you can get 7.5 or 8s for ONS or 'regular dating' but are getting 6s in your harlem?

Good question.

It depends.

A lot of girls, some hotter than others, don't end up in the harem. But, in the last 2 weeks I've banged a handful of the prettiest girls I've ever slept with, and I'm going to try to get them on board.

I also don't participate in the 1-10 scale thing, since it doesn't make any sense to me, so it's hard for me to objectively answer this question one way or the other.

(05-31-2015 05:46 PM)The Wire Wrote:  

2. How are you initially meeting these girls? Daygame, nightgame, online...etc

Mostly Tinder/iphone dating apps.

I've become exceptionally good at pulling from these apps, so it is what it is.

(05-31-2015 05:46 PM)The Wire Wrote:  

3. If you're getting compliance for them to come over and fuck you to begin with then why take them out the second time? Are you finding they get bored quicker and flake out if you keep it strictly sexual?

I want them to know I like them as people, and not just as sex objects. When a girl is emotionally connected the sex is always much better. Plus, I only keep around the girls that I honestly like, so it's fun for me to go out on dates with them too.

That said, I do have 2 girls right now that I've been banging for 5+ months that I've never seen outside my place. But they are young (both 22) so I think that is part of it.

I am still learning too, so maybe there is more to be said about these girls, but it's hard to say definitively one way or the other.

(05-31-2015 05:46 PM)The Wire Wrote:  

4. Are you leveraging something else as well for these girls to want to be your fuck buddy? Exceptional good looking? tall? or is this more of a game mentality that you are setting a sexual frame for these girls.

I'm certainly not tall nor exceptionally good looking.

I have a bit of growing social status within my city and a few others, which helps, but I don't think that's what is doing it.

I think I'm just able to calibrate and emotionally connect with these girls, make them comfortable and feeling good, then bang them properly.

I'm like the boyfriend they never had.

[Suits]

This is excellent advice.

[Prince Machiavelli]

This is definitely a great harem building guide. I use a similar system however, I don't always get the bang on the first meet-up, but it usually works out with similar results.

[afue]

Love two weeks between first date and second. Going to try that out for a while.

In the past, I've done a week between first and second. Then a few weeks after that to third, then casual hanging out every week or so.

It's casual out of the gate, clear expectations. But, once it goes to more weekly, every other week, things fall apart after a month and a half or so. "Defining the relationship" talk, gets messy, and it ends on a bad note.

Two weeks right away, then 3 weeks between hanging out, sounds perfect - and makes it way easier to keep things fun.

[kaotic]

I'm cosigning this.

This is how I keep my harem going, it's always a revolving door, so I never stress about losing a girl.

I've even tested out going radio silent on them to see how long it takes them to contact me.

Most my girls know the score, there are a handful that really like me, but know they can't tie me down, sooner or later than ends.

Besides I've got a LTR i'm digging as well.

You can't invest emotion into this - but honestly you should enjoy being around them.

I don't invest (read: dates after the bang) much in plates UNLESS they're pretty cool.

[Giorgioo]

some similarities with the plate theory of the rational male!

[Aer]

(05-30-2015 05:26 PM)BlurredSevens Wrote:  

Step #4: Invest substantially in the second meet

This is where things get interesting. This is where she's in brand new territory. This is where emotional game and harem building starts.

For the second meetup, I take the girl on a nice date. I'll drop cash on a fancy night on the town – tell her to wear heels and I'll be dressed sharp. Or I'll make her a gourmet dinner from scratch. Or I'll take her to a concert. Or I'll let her into my life by sharing intimate photos and stories about my past, allowing her to see my passions and to see what makes me tick.

And it's all real at this point: no games, just me being me and connecting with her on a deeper level.

The purpose of investing on the second meet is to show the girl that I'm invested in her, that I like her, and that I'm not just in it for the sex. I'm letting her know that I find her to be a quality girl, and that we'd both be better off hitched together for a minute.

I've noticed this also. I remember a girl saying to me that she was extremely surprised when I hit her up to make dinner for her, only 5 days after we had really rough sex in a near public area (one night stand, obviously).

I went on to date her, but I have done this to other girls without dating them and keeping them in my harem. Your method is great for segueing into an emotional connection with ease. That is, if you want to.

edit: Shit I just realized I used your zero date bang recipe on round 2 of the interaction, with cooking rather than drinks. Thoughts on that instead of bringing a girl out for round 2?

Also, +1 for expounding these game truths.

[MaceTyrell]

What suggestions would you have for those who don't have luck with Tinder and want to do bars/nightclubs? Just following Roosh advice? (but always going for the kill the day/night of: getting a number for "later" is a myth from my experience).

Great post btw.

[Roardog]

(06-09-2015 01:47 PM)MaceTyrell Wrote:  

What suggestions would you have for those who don't have luck with Tinder and want to do bars/nightclubs? Just following Roosh advice? (but always going for the kill the day/night of: getting a number for "later" is a myth from my experience).

Great post btw.

You don't have to use online for this to work. If you SNL a girl or get her number through social circle or day game this still applies.

[Haxton]

Hey, great thread - thanks a lot!^^

[YossariansRight]

Nice write up. Here's a few more items I'll add:

1. Keep get togethers with fuckbuddies/harem members/plates to 1 day per week - more than that and they will start to fantasize and develop illusions of grandeur. This is the number 1 reason why fuckbuddy setups fail in my experience.

2. Don't Facebook, Instagram, whatever them. Distance is crucial for success. They are not your girlfriend/SO.

3. No sleepovers, no going for breakfast, etc. See item 1. An occasional going for a drink or bringing a pizza/some Chinese food/etc. over to her place is ok. My place is usually a no-fly zone. I don't want any drama showing up at my door.

4. YMMV, but fuckbuddies don't convert to anything more than fuckbuddies. Don't get sucked in. Sucked off is perfect; suck in isn't.

Be cool, don't give a shit and cum - utilize your fuckbuddies/harem members/plates for all they're worth.

[Haxton]

(08-06-2015 09:45 AM)YossariansRight Wrote:  

Nice write up. Here's a few more items I'll add:

1. Keep get togethers with fuckbuddies/harem members/plates to 1 day per week - more than that and they will start to fantasize and develop illusions of grandeur. This is the number 1 reason why fuckbuddy setups fail in my experience.


2. Don't Facebook, Instagram, whatever them. Distance is crucial for success. They are not your girlfriend/SO.

3. No sleepovers, no going for breakfast, etc. See item 1. An occasional going for a drink or bringing a pizza/some Chinese food/etc. over to her place is ok. My place is usually a no-fly zone. I don't want any drama showing up at my door.

4. YMMV, but fuckbuddies don't convert to anything more than fuckbuddies. Don't get sucked in. Sucked off is perfect; suck in isn't.

Be cool, don't give a shit and cum - utilize your fuckbuddies/harem members/plates for all they're worth.

@1.)
Your advice helps in practice, but many women still will expect more and keep investing into you , what finally might and will lead to cutting you off once they realize that they cannot get you in an exclusive LTR...

@2.)
I also find it important that you usually reach a point where you dont innitiate any text-OG-convos anymore with her, but how far can you go in practice?
When i even dont respond to their "keeping in touch"-convos, then usually they will just slow their invest down and sometimes to a point where they suddenly are no longer so easy available for meet ups if you would wish to do so...
Dont you have this problem form your epxerience?

@3.)
You are talking bout fuckbuddies, but not bout friends with benefits...
and at least for your superstars in you harem you dont need random fuckbuddies, but the latter one... so actually you are totally off here and all the mentioned things you said, you actually do regularly (though not in a too high frequency... maybe on average once every 2 weeks... not sure bout perfect the frequency-stuff yet) ....

@4.)
Again you are only referring to the lower players in your harem and not to the top-end...

[DonnyGately]

Great great stuff by Blurred7s.

Nowhere near as successful as him, I struggle with more than 3 girls usually, but I can definitely cosign:

Fuck as fast as possible, alternating booty calls with 'dates' is a great strategy. Always tell them heels and dress-up nicely for dates.

2 weeks is good for new adds, keeps them always interested in seeing you and fucking. They are likely not fucking anyone else once you form that emotional connection. I never ask, of course.

Sex *must* be dominant, hot and slutty. You have to give them things no other guy does, using experience on your end and no judgement. Then when they come back over and over they'll start requesting to do things they've never done before - anal, 3-ways, hogties, public sex, sex with vibrators, taking photos and videos, you name it. I've had girls ask me to do all of those things to/with them.

Photos via IG or Snap are great ways to keep them hooked. Not texting or FB, hell no.

Also he made a great point about girls 'too busy' to date. You can get great sex out of these girls by seeing them even less than 2 weeks. 3-4 weeks is perfect if they're in med school, law school, travel a ton for work.

Some girls won't come back. Their loss.

[Haxton]

@ blurred Sevens:

I agree on your rules that usually you should fuckclose her at the first date + fast sex with not a ton of invest withing the first meet up is crucial usually,
but you limit yourself in your options when you say "no date + just get her as soon as possible drunk"

thats what Im doing once a week -> clubgame and meet up there...
But with my demanding career i cannot afford to consume higher levels of alcohol every day.
So for all other meet ups unless this 1 day in the week where Im going out nighttime, I have to rely on meeting up daytime... and here boozing out together is usually not what is approporiate for many different reasons...

Still I manage imo kinda decently well the concepts of "not too much investmment at the first meet up + setting logistics + fucking fast..." by following day-meetup-procedre, whixh I wannashare cause maybe it might work also for other guys who cannot afford partying nighttime all the time...:
1.) Meet up for watching a movie in the cinema - imo the perfect first meet up cause it kinda casual and you dont need to invest a lot.... you barely talking cause obv you watch a fun-movie...
2.) Usually after have been watching a cool fun-movie together, the vibe is pretty positive and fun, so here I go then to my fav bar-lounge (lol, all the staff know me already there and have talked with me what the fuck is going on that I come there often several times a week with always different women...^^) and here you drink then together 2-3 drinks (thank god that women in general already feel a lil easier after this small amount of drinks) -> here I set up logistics by suggesting to go to my place to watch another even cooler movie....
3.) at my place then obv -> movie on -> drink one more drink together (always have in my fridge some alc, women mostly like^^) -> fuck her hard....

Its always the same and it works like almost always....
So thats just an alternative-meet up-procedre if you cant go all the tiem for the first meet up clubbing and partying, boozing out the hell out of you.....