[Courage Reborn]

Quality post OP. Your diagnosis is on the money. The opt-out solution you're proposing however, is the wrong play.

Noir is correct. The US 18-25 demographic has become nearly unobtainable without social media game mastery. Opt out, and she'll simply turn her attention to the majority of men willing to provide stimulation on her terms.

Like it or not, the game has changed. We're in a high supply sexual marketplace. The sexual market value of men has plunged, sure. But I would argue that average young men are still getting average young women (6's & 7's), albeit through different channels. They can still be seen hand in hand all over the world.

How? By using the same stuff that has always worked, albeit now it's via images & the written word;

Make her laugh
Get personal
Be entertaining
Establish an emotional connection


Beautiful young women however, are more challenging than ever. To get them, being exceptional is less important than creating the appearance of it. Combine this with the encouragement to attention whore at an unprecedented level, and you've got a recipe for mass frustration. Beautiful young women who don't indulge in the game are hidden gems in small towns, or on a rare trip to the big city. Finding them is pure chance.

Evolution, progression, whatever you want to call it, there's no going back now. Adapt, or die. The choice is ours.

[olspice1588]

(01-12-2015 06:57 PM)Katdogbirdduck Wrote:  

(01-12-2015 06:50 PM)Switch Wrote:  

Play the game. Men are getting laid more than ever, and it's the ones who play the social media game best that are getting laid. Remember, it doesn't matter who you are, it only matters who girls think you are. It doesn't matter if you are the most interesting man in the world if you can't portray that to girls. And the way you do that in the 21st century is social media. Play the game.

This!
What chicks perceive of the guy, what the guy exhibits is the most crucial part in game.
The guy could have a lot more than what he can show, but that would make him just a loser in a girl's eyes.
It's how the recess of the chicks' psychology, moods and hormones fluctuate under the influence of the guy's charisma and attitude that are hugely important for a guy to notice and take note of.

Potentially.

Funny story: I met a Ukrainian girl at a bar. She wanted to exchange FB instead of phone numbers. I said I didn't have one and got her number. I introduced myself to her with my nickname but added her on FB a few days later (with my real name on my account). I would text her sexy banter or even a sexy pic, and she would ask if I had a FB account, not even realizing we already were FB friends.

Girls don't even know who their FB friends are. I add random hot chicks from time to time and message them

[Katdogbirdduck]

(01-12-2015 07:07 PM)olspice1588 Wrote:  

(01-12-2015 06:57 PM)Katdogbirdduck Wrote:  

(01-12-2015 06:50 PM)Switch Wrote:  

Play the game. Men are getting laid more than ever, and it's the ones who play the social media game best that are getting laid. Remember, it doesn't matter who you are, it only matters who girls think you are. It doesn't matter if you are the most interesting man in the world if you can't portray that to girls. And the way you do that in the 21st century is social media. Play the game.

This!
What chicks perceive of the guy, what the guy exhibits is the most crucial part in game.
The guy could have a lot more than what he can show, but that would make him just a loser in a girl's eyes.
It's how the recess of the chicks' psychology, moods and hormones fluctuate under the influence of the guy's charisma and attitude that are hugely important for a guy to notice and take note of.

Potentially.

Funny story: I met a Ukrainian girl at a bar. She wanted to exchange FB instead of phone numbers. I said I didn't have one and got her number. I introduced myself to her with my nickname but added her on FB a few days later (with my real name on my account). I would text her sexy banter or even a sexy pic, and she would ask if I had a FB account, not even realizing we already were FB friends.

Girls don't even know who their FB friends are. I add random hot chicks from time to time and message them

You're right sometimes it works.
But not all girls react the same in my high opinion.
Once I got to know a hot German girl this way and things went smoothly and we chatted for a long time, the other time I tried it with a much hotter Danish girl, but unfortunately no luck there.
In the end real life encounters are what matters most I believe, if you want to avoid embarassing situations.

[bpryce]

(01-12-2015 07:01 PM)Courage Reborn Wrote:  

Quality post OP. Your diagnosis is on the money. The opt-out solution you're proposing however, is the wrong play.

Noir is correct. The US 18-25 demographic has become nearly unobtainable without social media game mastery. Opt out, and she'll simply turn her attention to the majority of men willing to provide stimulation on her terms.

Like it or not, the game has changed. We're in a high supply sexual marketplace. The sexual market value of men has plunged, sure. But I would argue that average young men are still getting average young women (6's & 7's), albeit through different channels. They can still be seen hand in hand all over the world.

How? By using the same stuff that has always worked, albeit now it's via images & the written word;

Make her laugh
Get personal
Be entertaining
Establish an emotional connection


Beautiful young women however, are more challenging than ever. To get them, being exceptional is less important than creating the appearance of it. Combine this with the encouragement to attention whore at an unprecedented level, and you've got a recipe for mass frustration. Beautiful young women who don't indulge in the game are hidden gems in small towns, or on a rare trip to the big city. Finding them is pure chance.

Evolution, progression, whatever you want to call it, there's no going back now. Adapt, or die. The choice is ours.

"social media game mastery" seems like a hard thing to get though. Lets be honest, its very very superficial and a lot of times you don't even get a chance if she doesn't like how you look (tinder).

Everything else matters, being cool, leading, being dominant and so on.

Are there ways to increase your chances? Other than running a huge spamming game with good bots, im not sure.

[Neo]

I agree with your observations and also with advent that "the best school is old school."

For man with desire and game social media/dating apps are not needed.

Gaming solely online simply does not develop a man and give him the balls he needs to succeed in all areas life. The mindset of a guy who does 1000 real life approaches vs. a guy who hits up 1000 girls online is totally different. I've noticed an effect in myself when I've gone short periods of doing solely online after just a few weeks... I tend to notice that I'm more lazy and fearful in general.

The reason I've been successful with online dating is mainly cause of my date and closing game.

I think you should try this experiment, go off the grid, and report back to the forum.

Let us know how it goes.

[tallandblonde]

(01-12-2015 07:51 PM)Neo Wrote:  

I agree with your observations and also with advent that "the best school is old school."

For man with desire and game social media/dating apps are not needed.

Gaming solely online simply does not develop a man and give him the balls he needs to succeed in all areas life. The mindset of a guy who does 1000 real life approaches vs. a guy who hits up 1000 girls online is totally different. I've noticed an effect in myself when I've gone short periods of doing solely online after just a few weeks... I tend to notice that I'm more lazy and fearful in general.

The reason I've been successful with online dating is mainly cause of my date and closing game.

I think you should try this experiment, go off the grid, and report back to the forum.

Let us know how it goes.

True. But it's not a bad compliment. But it should never be more than that.

[Noir]

Let's be clear, social media exists to solidify your image and add congruence to the cool image you have created, post-approach.

You still have to approach via any channel possible; direct, indirect, social circle etc.

[ElJefe]

How do you master social media when you never take photos (taking photos of yourself and uploading them is pretty sad, unless it's something legitimately cool, like climbing a mountain)?

Here's a silly confession: i have actually considered going back to crossfit, and one of the reasons is that people attention whore in that sport so much that they'll be uploading photos and tagging me regularly.

[Noir]

(01-13-2015 04:20 AM)ElJefe Wrote:  

How do you master social media when you never take photos (taking photos of yourself and uploading them is pretty sad, unless it's something legitimately cool, like climbing a mountain)?

Here's a silly confession: i have actually considered going back to crossfit, and one of the reasons is that people attention whore in that sport so much that they'll be uploading photos and tagging me regularly.

Spend time around your platonic female friends or social circle and it will happen automatically.

Every now and then post a pic of something cool you are doing. Bonus points for instagram filters and what not.

[Brazilianguy]

Hey there.
Nice to read all the different opinions.

As to me, "the best school is the old school" all the way!
I listen to old music, read old books, lift weights the old way and eat natural just like in the past. I talk to girls with my mouth, too.

I deleted my whatsapp account yesterday, and let me tell you, it´s a huge feeling of freedom! It´s like the virtual ball and chain is off at last.

Interesting how these social media apps create a very real mental attachment.
I feel like I am further away from my friends, now that I don´t see their pictures and get their messages every day, and I value them more because of that.

I sent the following message to the girls I picked up last week: "I decided to delete my whatsapp account as it´s such a huge time drain to me. I work all week and am busy with other activities, so I haven´t got time for online life. It´s real life for me. If you want to get in touch, give me a call and I´ll get back to you when I can."

One of them sent me a phone message in the night, a few hours later: "Hey, I just read your message. So I won´t be able to hear your voice anymore? :/
I´ll be free in the evenings, and I´d like to meet you this week."

I´ll reply to her later in the day and set something up. It´s interesting how you become naturally more aloof and unattached to the girls when you don´t see a picture of their faces next to their phone messages, so the urge to reply right away and to behave like a thirsty simp simply does not occur.

So, I´m offline now. Fuck that shit.

[Brazilianguy]

Oh, yeah, I´ll keep you posted about the results.

The worst that can happen is that nothing will change, since whatsapp never really did anything for me.

[Days of Broken Arrows]

Have most guys now figured out that the worse way attract a woman is to like her selfies?

I ask because in looking at the women on my FB page who most selfies, most every "like" is from other women...or much older or married men who aren't part of her sexual dating market.

Example: one woman I know posted a vacation pic. Her 35 likes break down to 25 women and almost all the ten guys are married. Reverse this scenario: If I put out a pic and got 25 likes by guys and ten by married women, it would not make my day. I'd want to be swarmed by hot, eligible females, and I'm sure she's thinking the reverse.

[StrikeBack]

Yep DOBA I mostly see women liking each other's social media BS

[trainwreck]

(01-12-2015 02:40 PM)Noir Wrote:  

My two cents.
.....

This should become a sticky. It's basically the same that I do. I upload pictures on my IG of cool stuff I'm doing and on FB I just let myself get tagged by friends.

[Noir]

(01-13-2015 07:01 AM)Days of Broken Arrows Wrote:  

Have most guys now figured out that the worse way attract a woman is to like her selfies?

I ask because in looking at the women on my FB page who most selfies, most every "like" is from other women...or much older or married men who aren't part of her sexual dating market.

Example: one woman I know posted a vacation pic. Her 35 likes break down to 25 women and almost all the ten guys are married. Reverse this scenario: If I put out a pic and got 25 likes by guys and ten by married women, it would not make my day. I'd want to be swarmed by hot, eligible females, and I'm sure she's thinking the reverse.

It could be cultural, age related or a litmus test of men's availability.

Most of the likes received by hot girls in my circle are from single ones, not taken ones.

Probably due to the fact that nosey girlfriends can see this on their feed and guys are ashamed or not interested in listening to a mouthful from their jealous girlfriends.

Interesting observation nonetheless.

[UroboricForms]

I have an interesting point about facebook selfies, thirst and attention whoring. I typically don't bother. I see all these thirsty likes and comments and it makes me feel physically uncomfortable sometimes, especially the ones that get flat out ignored by the chick in question, those are good for a laugh if not even more depressing.

The way I look at it is this: to quote Antony H Wilson "In a world where everyone else is promoting, and you're not, you stand out a mile". By refusing to join in with the general clusterfuck of liking pics and lame comments (I only usually say something when I have something funny/witty to say, or it it suits me), does that make you stand out more in her mind? "Who is this guy that doesn't bother kissing my ass in public like everyone else"? In theory it should work, but I wonder if so many of them are now so addicted to the whole circus that they won't be interested til you rub em up the right way?

Just a thought.

[TheBulldozer]

Facebook and Instagram should not be your game, but rather a slice of who you are.

I update my accounts once a month if I'm lucky, and I find it very effective if you're someone who is global. I have a home, but I'm on the road so much that any girl realistically understands I'm not the best relationship material. I make for a hell of a fling for a few months, but at this point, that's all I can offer.

A swath of my Facebook and Instagram accounts involve photos of me, well, basically around the world. Business class flight here, Shanghai skyline there. A night out in BKK, followed by a day on the beach in Tel Aviv. You get the point.

One never quite knows where I am, but always knows I'm up to something good. My likes skyrocket into dozens and hundreds because I use my real accounts, the ones I use for my family, with the ones I use for girls. And it's important to do that because I'm not after some eight cent slut, but high quality girls who see the reality that this is my actual life, not some fake Facebook fabrication of who I want to become.

Girls have an uncanny eye to see through bullshit, but when presented with the real deal they're more than willing to shape into line and appreciate the merits of a man of excellence. It's up to you to present that standard to them.

[Thesoloist]

I agree with OP, nightgame now has turned into a "Social Club" people use to go out to meet other people but now people only go out in social circles more so then ever.

Personally I tell girls I don't have any social media, what it does is kill your mystery. Even if you have social media lie about it or tell a girl you don't add them tell xyz amount of times.

Snapchat/Instagram/Twitter all of them shits are Game killers

[almohajem]

Here is my observation:

Women on Social Media (Facebook, Tinder, Whatever...) gets LOTS of attention. This gives them a positive feedback about themselves and distract them from the truth.

That's why they are sticking their nose on their phones ALL DAY.

They think they can get the prettiest man to get laid with, the funniest for a date, and the richest for a marriage.

The truth is they get NONE of that for the most of them. That's why they stick their nose on their phones. The Truth is very hard to digest.

I got only two bangs of 4 bangs from social media. (yes, my number count is ridiculously low) but guess what. My direct approach resulted in 50% success (2 out of 4) while I have probably gone through a 300-400 girls, 10-15 dates for the social media game.

At the end of the day, it's a number's game. But in social media women are too busy assessing themselves, getting away from the truth, and trying to find the BEST. You have no chance unless you are the "BEST"

I only kept Tinder on my phone (I use facebook solely for Family) and I swipe for fun, and no longer talk to women on "Social Media".

[almohajem]

I see an analogy for this with a family relative. She failed school, and work. She spends all day in front of the TV watching Korean/Indian movies about success, riches, and love.

This distract her from her SAD TRUTH.

Uneasy women will go to Social Media to distract themselves from the TRUTH.

The TRUTH being they are ugly, undesirable and bitchy.

I should note that the 2 I banged from social media were 5-6 and the two I banged from direct fame were 7-7.

In reality, you are very unlikely to lower your standards. Online, you'll probably do it for the "fun of it". So you are stuck with bad choices.

[Thesoloist]

(01-12-2015 12:07 PM)RockHard Wrote:  

but actually going into battle is a completely different thing. I think that a lot of the frustration women feel is that a lot of chumps have gotten good at online game but when it comes to meeting in person they fall way short. They've either lied ridiculously about their appearance or they just have no personal presence. Any woman who's done online dating for a little while ends up completely jaded.

There is a huge cognitive dissonance with most american women. They become jaded with online dating yet many will spend years upon years online dating. I recently had a co-worker tell me she misses "romance" in dating yet this chick has done nothing but online dating since she left college.....

[Brazilianguy]

(01-13-2015 06:42 AM)Brazilianguy Wrote:  

Hey there.
Nice to read all the different opinions.

As to me, "the best school is the old school" all the way!
I listen to old music, read old books, lift weights the old way and eat natural just like in the past. I talk to girls with my mouth, too.

I deleted my whatsapp account yesterday, and let me tell you, it´s a huge feeling of freedom! It´s like the virtual ball and chain is off at last.

Interesting how these social media apps create a very real mental attachment.
I feel like I am further away from my friends, now that I don´t see their pictures and get their messages every day, and I value them more because of that.

I sent the following message to the girls I picked up last week: "I decided to delete my whatsapp account as it´s such a huge time drain to me. I work all week and am busy with other activities, so I haven´t got time for online life. It´s real life for me. If you want to get in touch, give me a call and I´ll get back to you when I can."

One of them sent me a phone message in the night, a few hours later: "Hey, I just read your message. So I won´t be able to hear your voice anymore? :/
I´ll be free in the evenings, and I´d like to meet you this week."

I´ll reply to her later in the day and set something up. It´s interesting how you become naturally more aloof and unattached to the girls when you don´t see a picture of their faces next to their phone messages, so the urge to reply right away and to behave like a thirsty simp simply does not occur.

So, I´m offline now. Fuck that shit.

Update: just got another message from the girl, asking me again when I want to set up the date (I haven´t replied to the message she sent me last night yet).
If this is a taste of things to come without whatsapp cripping my style, then my impression is that interaction will be back under my control and mystery and unavailability are back in my game.

[tallandblonde]

(01-13-2015 10:23 AM)Brazilianguy Wrote:  

Update: just got another message from the girl, asking me again when I want to set up the date (I haven´t replied to the message she sent me last night yet).
If this is a taste of things to come without whatsapp cripping my style, then my impression is that interaction will be back under my control and mystery and unavailability are back in my game.

Are these voice messages? Or SMS?

Interested to see how this works for you.

[Brazilianguy]

(01-13-2015 11:28 AM)tallandblonde Wrote:  

(01-13-2015 10:23 AM)Brazilianguy Wrote:  

Update: just got another message from the girl, asking me again when I want to set up the date (I haven´t replied to the message she sent me last night yet).
If this is a taste of things to come without whatsapp cripping my style, then my impression is that interaction will be back under my control and mystery and unavailability are back in my game.

Are these voice messages? Or SMS?

Interested to see how this works for you.

SMS

[OGNorCal707]

This thread is hitting pretty close to home, I'm with the OP and am an anti-social media guy, but in 2014 I may as well be a unicorn compared to everyone else in mainstream society.

I haven't had a facebook since 2011 and the only reason why I had one then is because my first LTR insisted I have one, even then she basically made the page for me and got all her friends to add me. After we broke up and how fucked up it was, I couldn't stomach facebook anymore, granted it was mostly due to her, she claimed to be so utterly torn apart by the break up, sad and depressed, only to post stuff about how awesome such and such's party was and how it was so fun.

I'm only 30, but this social media stuff just doesn't sit right with me, I don't know how quickly facebook completely took over the whole world. In the U.S. it seems like 90% of the people between the ages 16-35 have a page. Shit, even old ass people in their 60's and 70's are getting it.

To me it just seems like a new form of attention whoring, especially for women, but for men too. In this society and culture, everyone wants to feel special and like they are important, like they are some kind of reality star, and the facebook achieves this on a microscopic level. We all know and have discussed the implications of guys acting thirsty and pedestalizing women on facebook and instagram, liking their pics and posting all kind of beta shit, like "you're the most beautiful girl I've ever laid eyes on."

The shit actually makes me sick to my stomach when I see how pathetic and beta some of the comments guys leave on there. What's even sadder is they think that it's somehow going to make themselves more attractive and increase their chances with these chicks.

The attention whoring on facebook and instagram and the thirsty guy's liking and commenting on there just perpetuates all the issues that we are dealing with in the sexual marketplace. It inflates women's egos to astronomical levels, makes them think their stock is worth more than it is, and gives them a seemingly infinite pool of potential men to choose from.

Another thing which I think is a huge issue that I don't think has been touched on, is how easy facebook has made it for women to be slick and talk to other guys without their boyfriends finding out. Now unless you do some internet detective work and hack a girls' facebook account, you have no clue what kind of shit she's got cooking.

Recently one of my good friend's girlfriend was saying that she wanted to help me set up a tinder account since she thinks I'm a good dude and knows I'm single and kind of over the whole bar scene. As she was talking to me about it she said "oh to set up tinder you need facebook", to which I was really surprised, why the fuck do you need facebook to set up tinder? It's like all the social media sites are becoming a conglomerate and are trying to force you to join and use all of them.

Two weeks ago I got this 21 year old 6.5's number at the coffee shop, we were texting and everything seemed good, she agreed to a date at a local bar, but one thing I thought was off was over text she asked me what my last name is. I replied, "how about I'll tell you on Thursday, I don't have facebook so you wouldn't find me anyway lol"....

Well Thursday rolled around and ofcourse when I texted her to confirm in the evening, she flaked on me with some excuse that "something came up that I have to take care of". I was telling a friend about this and he said that she "probably got weirded out that I don't have facebook and that she couldn't find me online". He was saying that it's standard procedure to look a person up and check them out on facebook now before actually meeting up to hang out with them in real life.

This same friend is a great person, a good friend, but is very much on the blue pill side of the spectrum. He was actually kind of trying to shame me for not having facebook or any social media presence, saying that girls were going to think I was "creepy" and that only a convicted felon or sex offender wouldn't have one in this day and age.

What the fuck has society and culture come to that you are now expected to be like all the other attention whores and have a social media page? I'm not trying to hate on or shame other men that do have facebook or instagram, if it works for you and you enjoy it more power to you, I know a lot of guys who do use this as a tool to pick up women, but I don't think it should be expected as a prerequisite in order to pick up women. However that is what society has come to, if you're not on social media you are labeled as being "creepy" or "weird".

Whatever happened to just doing your own thing without being glued to a laptop or smart phone, constantly uploading pictures of yourself, and commenting and liking people's pics and posts, it's too self absorbed and artificial for me. I'll be doing me in real life not on the internet, if I'm creepy or weird because of that then so be it.

I much rather not deal with all that shit, then act like some woman, constantly taking pics of myself on nights out with my friends on my smart phone, acting like I'm some kind of special snowflake posting them online, thinking that the world revolves around me, and I'm some kind of reality tv star.