[Sketness]

How do you get a girl to emotionally invest into you?

I've searched everywhere and could not find a explicit guide on how to accomplish this.

I think that a lot of problems will/ can be alleviated if this technique can be explained.

[eradicator]

deep conversion. You ejaculate in her mouth and make her say that she is your filthy little cum slut before she swallows.

Thanks mcqueen!

[ryanf]

(09-06-2014 01:49 AM)eradicator Wrote:  

deep conversion. You ejaculate in her mouth and make her say that she is your filthy little cum slut before she swallows.

Thanks mcqueen!

Agreed. You dominate her sexual world. Another way, albeit less useful, is getting her to invest in you in other ways. Ask for small, but escalating favors. This is straight out of psychology, and why beta male game doesn't work: people are more likely to feel invested in you if they do YOU favors, instead of you doing THEM favors. It boils down to reciprocity. If you continuously do someone favors, they feel like you've created a sense of obligation in them. Women hate obligation. When she's doing favors for you, she thinks it's creating an obligation on your end, i.e. commitment.

tl;dr, smash her good and get her to bring you home-cooked meals as often as possible. It will work.

[GoldenGod]

You have to open yourself to her, show her your vulnerabilities and desires. Give her a peek at your soul. Take her out and make her laugh so hard she chokes on her dinner. Having the power to give her Multiple Os also helps

In what context are you talking about? LT relationship or on initial meet?

[Sketness]

(09-06-2014 11:38 PM)GoldenGod Wrote:  

You have to open yourself to her, show her your vulnerabilities and desires. Give her a peek at your soul. Take her out and make her laugh so hard she chokes on her dinner. Having the power to give her Multiple Os also helps

In what context are you talking about? LT relationship or on initial meet?

im talking about on the initial couple of meets, how can you fast track to sex

[OnlyMarryInTajikistan]

(09-07-2014 12:48 AM)Sketness Wrote:  

(09-06-2014 11:38 PM)GoldenGod Wrote:  

You have to open yourself to her, show her your vulnerabilities and desires. Give her a peek at your soul. Take her out and make her laugh so hard she chokes on her dinner. Having the power to give her Multiple Os also helps

In what context are you talking about? LT relationship or on initial meet?

im talking about on the initial couple of meets, how can you fast track to sex

You don't need connection to get a girl to fuck you. In fact, she is probably more likely to fuck you WITHOUT connection.

[XXL]

The "technique" is to spend time with her drinking/smoking talking about experiences, hopes and dreams.

[ElBorrachoInfamoso]

Follow the D.E.N.N.I.S. system

Can't say I've tried it but it should work if you're sadistic enough

[Spider]

I'm very push push (no pull) with a lot of girls because that's just my personality. I'm generally extremely aggressive and sexual when running night game at bars/clubs or night-time street game.

This works great for sluts, but for many girls, building sexual attraction and running cocky aggressive game isn't enough. Many want to be seduced mentally, aka building a real connection and having them 'invest in you emotionally' as you mentioned in your thread title.

This is where balancing out sexual forwardness with trying to connect with the girl on a deeper level comes into play. I used to be the guy where if the girl wasn't down to fuck me within the 1st few hours of meeting t I'd just give up and move onto someone who would. I've altered my game a bit and added a lot more 'pull' where I basically stop making sexual advances and just talk about personal things.

A big key for me is discussing family. I don't randomly bring this shit up, but after I've been really touchy-feely with a girl on a date, or if I have her back at my place and she's making out with me but telling me to she's not going to fuck me etc. I'll pull a 180 and move a couple feet away from her and just lean back, as if I'm no longer interested in fucking her. Swap topics and start talking about personal shit like where she's from, what the neighborhood she grew up in was like...compare it with your own, talk about your siblings and how you get along with each of them.

Talk about that stuff for awhile and be a good actor. Make her think you're genuinely interested in who she is...that's when i generally pull the 180 again and go back to hooking up with her and just getting more sexual in general. Hopefully you've built enough emotional comfort for her to more easily welcome these advances.

You may be able to get this emotional investment through just a short conversation about each others lives...or it may take time over the course of a few dates. Depends if you're working on a slutty American or a conservative foreign girl. But just remember that game isn't all push and cocky jokes. Often times you have to reel them in by taking a big step back.

[Gunner]

This is a long answer that I read in Quora, it goes a little against the player style and I guest does not work with sluts but I have noticed that it works in Latin America, where girls are more femenine:

1) Do favors for each other. Studies show that when you do something nice for someone, especially on a whim, then you will like them more. That's right, the person doing the favor will feel closer to the person receiving the favor. It turns out that when we go out of our way to do something for someone else, our minds thinks, "I did this nice thing that I didn't have to do, so this person must be worth that effort." So, when you get a chance, go out of your way to visit a friend at the hospital, help them move to a new house, stay up late helping them practice for a presentation, and so on. Conversely, let people do nice things for you, even if you think you can manage by yourself.

As an anecdote, I needed four friends to help me out with a personal matter a few years ago. One of them bowed out at the last minute due to a family emergency, so I asked one of my coworkers, John, to fill in. He did, at considerable inconvenience to himself, and I was very grateful. Our careers diverged shortly thereafter, but we've kept in touch regularly. Even though we live on opposite coasts of the US, we feel pretty close because of that single favor. If John hadn't helped, we probably would have lost touch because, initially, we were not very close.

2) Share unique experiences. If you go watch a movie or have dinner with someone, it's just another evening. Three years from now, you probably won't remember the day any more than you'll remember what you did the day before or the day after. However, if you go to an amazing concert or eat at the French Laundry or hike up Half Dome for the first time, you'll remember the event vividly and, by association, you'll remember the people you shared it with. When someone is a core part of many of your most precious memories, it's hard not to feel closer to them.

3) Have meaningful conversations. The "10,000 hours of practice" meme suggests that enough deliberate practice can make you a world-class performer in almost any field. The "deliberate" part is key. If you repeat the same tennis shots for 3 hours a day over the course of a decade, you'll definitely be a very good tennis player. To be world-class, however, you need to practice thoughtfully. You have to challenge yourself with different shots, try small adjustments to your stroke, and so on. The goal is thoughtful repetition, not mindless repetition.

Conversations are the same. You can talk about a TV show that you like or the Giants' World Series win or how bad traffic was this morning, but it probably won't lead to a great bonding experience. Instead, talk about what you want out of life, how you felt when you didn't get accepted to the college you wanted to go to, what kind of parent you want to be, and so on. Obviously, you need to strike a balance of meaningful conversations and regular conversations, but the meaningful ones will really accelerate your friendship.

4) Open up. This is a combination of #1 and #3. When you're open with people, you'll feel closer to them. Furthermore, most people will reciprocate and talk more openly when you're being honest and vulnerable. This will, in turn, make them feel closer to you. It's a great positive feedback loop.

I recently went through a significant life event, and I was initially hesitant and embarrassed to talk to others about it. I'd gloss over it in casual conversations, then quickly move on to the next topic. Then I did something different: I tried being more open. To my surprise, a lot of great discussions came out of that. I learned that many of my friends experienced similar issues, we talked about how we dealt with things -- or how we wished we had dealt with them -- and we became much closer as a result. The things we believe are too shameful to talk about are rarely anything to be ashamed of.

5) Suffer together. Do something that each of you believes will be hard. This might mean volunteering for a presentation when both of you are afraid of public speaking, training for a marathon, or taking a college class together. When two people suffer side-by-side, the suffering deepens their connection.

6) Fake it 'til you make it. Think of all things you might do with your close friends: you drink from the same glass, try each other's food, aren't afraid to be yourselves, act silly, call and text frequently, take turns paying for meals without keeping track of a few dollars here and there, and so on. These things come from being comfortable with each other, but they can also be used to become more comfortable with each other. The top two answers to What's the best meal for a first date? reflect this approach: you become closer by acting as if you were already close.

One study showed that pairs of strangers who were asked to stare into each other's eyes for several minutes reported higher feelings of affection and attraction than a control group. Pretend intimacy results in actual intimacy.

7) Be an attentive listener. What you do and what you don't do can be equally important. If you optimize the hell out of the activities you do together but forget important things about the other person, you will end up sabotaging your own work. Nothing communicates "I don't care about you" more than you not remembering something that's very meaningful to your new friend. I learned this lesson the hard way. If you have to, jot down a few notes after each important conversation.

tl,dr: do nice things for each other, share unique experiences, have meaningful conversations, keep your guard down, support each other through difficult times, act as if you were already close, and listen carefully.

[Barron]

(09-06-2014 06:45 AM)ryanf Wrote:  

(09-06-2014 01:49 AM)eradicator Wrote:  

deep conversion. You ejaculate in her mouth and make her say that she is your filthy little cum slut before she swallows.

Thanks mcqueen!

Agreed. You dominate her sexual world. Another way, albeit less useful, is getting her to invest in you in other ways. Ask for small, but escalating favors. This is straight out of psychology, and why beta male game doesn't work: people are more likely to feel invested in you if they do YOU favors, instead of you doing THEM favors. It boils down to reciprocity. If you continuously do someone favors, they feel like you've created a sense of obligation in them. Women hate obligation. When she's doing favors for you, she thinks it's creating an obligation on your end, i.e. commitment.

tl;dr, smash her good and get her to bring you home-cooked meals as often as possible. It will work.

Post of the Week.

[Manipulator]

Very simple. Three things. Just rotate between them and space them out appropriately.

Make her cry
Make her cum
Reject her for sex occasionally

Done at the appropriate times and intervals you will own her.

Cheers,
Manipulator

[Dr. Howard]

bah! This is too complicated. There is an old term for this tool...it is called pillow talk.

After making her cum proceed to conversation. She will be in some sort of endorphin stupor and the simplest of connections...like you share the same favourite color will induce connection. Listen to what she says and respond in a way that Ryan Gosling in the Notebook would an you will be all set.

If you really want to play with fire sigh and say something like "you know, it would be nice to have a family some day...you know after I get tired of traveling the world and just cash out all of the stock I inherited from my grandfather's estate"

[Noir]

Great posts guys. Most of it has been covered, but one of my close friends pointed out that I give them 'the talk'.

Please note, my intentions are always to leave 'em better off than I find 'em. I am not in it just for the sex, just for shits and giggles, they know this shit has the potential to be serious. I am the judge, they are the performer; your position means you will give her tips as to how to 'succeed' should she want to spend more time with you but never directly. Always subtly and indirect.

Essentially, it boils down to a simplistic future adventure projection in which I screen her and lead her imagination towards the future.

I have no place in the image of her future directly. I will often spark her interest by asking her what her plans are for the next year. Her answer is irrelevant, despite me listening as I always ask her to tell me what she would do without any restraints. What are her dreams and goals and I inspire her throughout and give her a barrage of good emotions. This is always when we are alone.

Off the top of my head..

a) Inspire her for the future and give her positive feedback on her 'role' and how to succeed on her terms.

b) Make her understand herself better. There is always the discussion here that intelligence won't get you laid but rather timely applications of your intelligence will. This is a perfect opportunity for you to explain in a non-misogynistic way, the way you see the world.

c) Give her a bit of game/psychology talk. Let her subtly be aware of the my role and her role. Her behaviour is subject to reward. I can help her be what she wants to be.

d) Push/pull. For ever 3 'pushes' I noticed on average I will 'pull' once but it will be a strong pull. All she needs is a glimpse into what she would want and a challenge that she can 'conquer' you the same way you 'conquered' her. Usually, I will show a bit of vulnerability and let her know a bit about my sexual past. Never with names, never with people she knows. How would she like it if you did the same?

e) Understand that her ego will be at play; positively, she will be up for a challenge. Negatively, she will try and rationalize things and try to 'win' games.

f) You are on the same team, create that bubble. Once you create the bubble in which you have pet names, slutty names, dominant sex, inside jokes and of course, you have inspired her for the future, you just gotta keep leading.

g) Once you know you're 'ahead', your preselection vibes come through again. Never tell her, always let your actions or social media presence plant this seed of you being in demand. The fear of loss will tighten her investment.

I do this sparingly nowadays as women tend to become clingy. At my current age, I am playing with fire. With older girls, they want hardcore relationships leading to marriage. Younger girls are fickle and drama inducing. Ones my age usually have a the 'baggage' seed planted and this has the potential to bring it out in them.

I hope this helps.

[Dusty]

Give her an orgasm.

No joke. Make her come and she'll look at you with a sense of wonder.

Cumming is a lot more emotional for broads, and means a lot more, than us blasting a load.

[polar]

Quote:

d) Push/pull. For ever 3 'pushes' I noticed on average I will 'pull' once but it will be a strong pull. All she needs is a glimpse into what she would want and a challenge that she can 'conquer' you the same way you 'conquered' her. Usually, I will show a bit of vulnerability and let her know a bit about my sexual past. Never with names, never with people she knows. How would she like it if you did the same?

Noir, this is solid stuff. Can you elaborate, give some examples of how you push pull?

[Noir]

(09-08-2014 12:01 PM)polar Wrote:  

Quote:

d) Push/pull. For ever 3 'pushes' I noticed on average I will 'pull' once but it will be a strong pull. All she needs is a glimpse into what she would want and a challenge that she can 'conquer' you the same way you 'conquered' her. Usually, I will show a bit of vulnerability and let her know a bit about my sexual past. Never with names, never with people she knows. How would she like it if you did the same?

Noir, this is solid stuff. Can you elaborate, give some examples of how you push pull?

Sure. This is the bread and butter to building sexual tension and spiking her emotions. You will learn to adapt with different girls of different backgrounds. Please note, I have minimal experience with US girls but I have banged them all by being aloof and dismissive. For the Eastern Europeans and Mediterranean girls, more pull and the rest more push.

Generally, there is no recipe for push and pull as you gotta make it relevant for it to be successful. I had difficulty understanding it in the beginning by using verbals but purely non-verbals are enough.

I will push her most of the time simply by imposing my own desires and pushing when they are not met. With a lot of girls in the beginning, they will resist as they don't want to seem easy. I will pull once they allow it and go with it and 'reward' them.

My pull is usually behavioural. Direct body language. The push is non-verbal, body language when annoyed, verbal when being banterous.

The push/pull is initiated within my 'own frame' otherwise it is just her shit testing me to get a response.

Please note, push/pull has a lot to do with you pinging off her behaviour and responses, the better you are doing, the less push is required and the pull automatically happens.

Generally:

- She doesn't like football or know my home town? Push. 'that's okay, we can still be friends. on facebook.'

- She complains about me checking out another girl? Push, with a sly grin and eyebrow raise and then pull her into my space. Spike those emotions.

- She wants me to buy her a drink? Neutral (her 'frame'), I will buy one for both of us, but she must buy shots.

Afterwards when we are seeing each other, I use time as my ally for pushing and pulling.

- When we are out and spending time, whenever she says something interesting, I will pull and continue the discussion and make it sexual slowly.

- I will occasionally push by leaving conversations or excusing myself on high notes. This is when I feel it is appropriate, like she feels as if she is 'in control' of the conversation.

- I will pull when she passes my compliance tests. Sorry to be game-speak but this means her looking after my shit once I leave, remembering important things in my life, helping me take care of errands and problems. A lot of this includes them giving me rides and buying me coffee/cooking for me.

- She messages me something silly, I will push. 70% of the time, I will not respond immediately because I am busy but I will check the message on my homescreen. Let her know I have seen it. Something of value, I will pull and reward.

- We are out and she wears something super sexy. Pull. Most guys will get complex about taking her out and her looking fine as hell. She starts checking out other guys? Push. Start doing the same with other girls.

- I will be vulnerable and to pull her in. A lot of these girls open up to me and they want to be listened to but also to know that they are normal and not fucked up. Being fucked up myself, I will share a few of my own fuck ups and pull them in. Reward for being open with me and setting the tone for bonding etc.

This will create a set of behaviour that is acceptable and not acceptable. sidenote: I almost never answer booty calls and turn my phone off at night.

To summarize, I reward her good behaviour with pulls (the reward is up to you and your relationship with her. A girl of 3 years on off will get a different reward to a recent lay). This creates her wanting to behave 'well' around me. The push is when she does something stupid or un-ordinary or treats me like any other guy. Rarely verbal as that signifies weakness.

Let me know if anything is unclear or contradictory; it is hard to rationalize this into a forum post.