[Konkerer]

Hey guys, just looking for some advice on how to pickup girls while being overweight? I'm a fairly tall and big guy, I need to lose about 50 pounds/23KG. I get some attention from girls but I don't know how to react to them since I am not that confident. I am already enrolled in a gym so I am already trying to lose the weight but does anyone here have any other tips?

[MiXX]

It's no doubt that being overweight not only hits your confidence levels, but also your health. It's OK you are going to a GYM, but make sure that your diet is 100% accurate. You can plan to spend hours in the gym, and see little or very slow results if you are not eating the right combination of foods: Fruits, Proteins, FAT, Green Veggies and WATER, and eating them at the right tomes and portions. I would see a nutritionist too, not just a personal trainer in a gym.

My recommendation: Your health is more important than any piece of ass out there. Take the next 3 months to focus ONLY on yourself - forget women. Give yourself 3 months, and after you trim 60lbs of body fat, and gain 20lbs of muscle, you will see how women will come naturally to you - without any game at all!

There is a thread open on nutrition and ecerice already - post your comments there.

Mixx

[Jack Frost]

I was in the same situation a few years ago man. I graduated from college at 230 then ballooned up to around 275 over the years. I was still getting ass just not as much so I didnt realize it till I looked at some pictures. Mixx as usual is on point with his advice. Diets gonna be crucial. Look at it like this youre in the gym at most 2 hours a day the battle is won those other 22 hours with what you put in your body.

Im back at 230 now and the difference losing that weight will truly be life changing for you in all aspects. I pretty much ate nothing but protein shakes, chicken, brown rice, and green beans for 3 months. It sucked a fat fucking cock believe me but it was all worth it. You sound like youre around the same height and weight as I was (Im 6'5) what I did for exercise was Id go in the morning and run 3 miles then go after work lift weights and do 30 mins on the stairs. Everyones body reacts differently to different things so find what works for you. Good luck man and stick with it!

[gringoed]

I wish you the best Konkerer. Improving your health and body will naturally improve your confidence, no doubt. Mixx is right that diet is the most important element in determining whether you lose weight. I'd suggest finding a low-carb variation diet such as Atkins, Paleo, or Slow-carb and/or read a ton on the bodybuilding.com forum. Be careful of sneaky calories, especially from alcohol. I'd recommend stopping that altogether.

Find a diet/routine that you CAN STICK TO. Don't be afraid to tell everybody you know your goals, get them to bribe you with $, whatever it takes to keep you accountable and MOTIVATED.

You may want to join another forum with like-minded people so you don't feel so alone. Salud!

[Duke Castile]

(03-03-2011 05:02 PM)gringoed Wrote:  

I wish you the best Konkerer. Improving your health and body will naturally improve your confidence, no doubt. Mixx is right that diet is the most important element in determining whether you lose weight. I'd suggest finding a low-carb variation diet such as Atkins, Paleo, or Slow-carb and/or read a ton on the bodybuilding.com forum. Be careful of sneaky calories, especially from alcohol. I'd recommend stopping that altogether.

Find a diet/routine that you CAN STICK TO. Don't be afraid to tell everybody you know your goals, get them to bribe you with $, whatever it takes to keep you accountable and MOTIVATED.

You may want to join another forum with like-minded people so you don't feel so alone. Salud!

Not drinking is huge. Not only does if cause you to gain weight but, all that alcohol fucks with your body chemistry. Plus, you can't train as hard when you're hungover which really adds up.

[Konkerer]

Thanks. I have already made a program with help of that bodybuilding forum. All I need to do is work out now.
But what should I do in the meantime? Low Self confidence is killing and causing me blue balls.

[Duke Castile]

(03-03-2011 11:19 PM)Konkerer Wrote:  

Thanks. I have already made a program with help of that bodybuilding forum. All I need to do is work out now.
But what should I do in the meantime? Low Self confidence is killing and causing me blue balls.

Workout your game muscles by following Mixx's approach model.

[gringoed]

I disagree with Mixx that you should stop approaching and gaming. Game is like a muscle that gets stronger the more you practice it (use it or lose it), and I think improvement in how women respond to you over time will help motivate you to stay on your health program. It's not like taking care of yourself takes 100% of your free time anyway.

In 3 months you'll look much better AND be far better with the ladies.

Not to mention, sex is a great workout!!!

[Jack Frost]

Where I disagree with you and agree with Mixx on this is when you know youre out of shape it takes its toll on your confidence and when youre self aware of that its going to hinder all of his approaches then if getting shot down it could take its toll even more. When I lost my weight I kind of went into a self imposed exile and emerged from the lab ready to go. 2-3 months for the rest of your life is well worth it.

[Roosh]

Do both game and training simultaneously, since doing one doesn't preclude the other. As you lose the pounds and your confidence/appearance goes up, things should get easier.

[oldnemesis]

(03-03-2011 08:11 AM)Konkerer Wrote:  

I am already enrolled in a gym so I am already trying to lose the weight but does anyone here have any other tips?

In losing weight 70% of the success comes from your diet, only 30% comes from gym. And changes in your diet come from changes in your lifestyle, which is HARD. This is the main reason a lot of people who start losing, or even lost some weight get it all up back in a few years.

I would strongly suggest visiting a nutrition specialist so he would create a diet for you, which would take into account things you like and dislike, as well as your lifestyle. It cost money, but those are money well-spent. Trust me, following the diet is hard already, and it would be much easier for you to do so if your diet consist of something you like, not something the diet maker likes but you cannot stand.

[UgSlayer]

I agree with the notion that you should still pickup while overweight. That doesn't mean you shouldn't start going to the gym and change your diet. However, picking up girls while fat will shatter any limiting beliefs that you have about appearance when it comes to picking up girls, which will help you in the long run.

There are lots of fat guys who get laid because they don't have it in their minds that it limits them from spitting tight game. Tyler from RSD used to be fat, Future from Love Systems has gotten pretty fat, Knack from Venusian Arts is fat, Lovedrop from VA used to be really fat and is still pretty damn ugly. All these guys get laid.

My opinion of looks is that you have to be REALLY good looking for it to even matter, and even then, you still have to have some game, or you will only get laid by a small percentage of slightly above average looking girls.

[Selva]

A couple simple tips that will help. I have lost 50+ pounds since the beginning of October and these helped me a lot.

Cut out sodas and alcohol. Drink a lot of water, at least 2 liters a day.

Hit the sauna. Your body will burn extra calories without adding to the fatigue of your muscles. It will also help clean out toxins from your body, and as a bonus, it will really help your complexion.

Walk. I work my own schedule so I am able to go on epic walks, sometimes as long as 6 hours a day. Even more than the gym, I found that hauling my fat ass as far as I could really dropped the weight.

On non-workout days try to drop your carbohydrates about 20% less than usual, then eat normally on workout days.

I agree with continuing to game. I work out in a gym with way more girls than guys and once I started noticing them checking me out my workouts got a little extra lift. Plus, with the extra testosterone pumping through your system you will be extra-horny so you will want to have a girl or six to help you release the pressure.

Good luck

[benmarvin]

I'm going to second what Roosh said about this. Do both at the same time. Approaches and talking to girls will help boost your confidence over time, even if you fall flat on your face the first few times. In combination with improving your body, your game will improve. Like a perfect storm.

[Konkerer]

Bump. Thanks for all the replies even if it was a long time ago.

I've been working out consistently and have already shed 50% of what I have to lose. At first I ddin't have my diet in check and I noticed I wasn't losing fat that much. After 2 months I started cutting carbs and began to see results almost instantly. I agree that diet is key.

But I am still too insecure to approach... I have been talking to girls alot but only in my social circle or at school. I almost got a date with one a cute girl at a course I took. She was flattered by the way I spoke to her but turns out she was married, or at least pretended to be. The problem I have is that I am reading too much about game and not actually doing it. I know all the theory but just don't approach.

Do you recommend hiring a prostitute since I am still a virgin and it's really becoming a problem for me?

[WesternCancer]

What everyone else said. Aside from diet one of the most important things is visualizing yourself after you've lost the weight and how it will catapult you into the upper eschelons of game. Exaggerate and shoot high it will help you be stupidly confident. Before you approach girls visualize yourself as the new bitchslaying you.

[Timoteo]

I've found that a lot of women out there LIKE a big guy, so while it's a good idea to lose inches and harden your body for your health and self-esteem, don't think that you CAN'T talk to women, or that you'll necessarily be unattractive to women. It's not true.

[MiXX]

(12-20-2011 01:09 PM)Timoteo Wrote:  

I've found that a lot of women out there LIKE a big guy...

Let me finish that sentence for you.

like a bug guy {with money}

The only reason hot women date overweight men is because they are either controlling the relationship in every angle, or b) The man is spending mega $$$ on her clothes, rent and car payments.

Hot women do not fuck obese men without something of far greater value in return, in this case LOTS OF $$$ you throw at her, and she controls you and does what she pleases.

Don't kid yourself, love handles are NOT attractive to women, and if you are broke, good luck finding hot (non-pro) women to fuck with 30LBS of subcutaneous fat around your waistline, and man boobs.


Mixx

[Timoteo]

(12-20-2011 02:01 PM)MiXX Wrote:  

(12-20-2011 01:09 PM)Timoteo Wrote:  

I've found that a lot of women out there LIKE a big guy...

Let me finish that sentence for you.

like a bug guy {with money}

The only reason hot women date overweight men is because they are either controlling the relationship in every angle, or b) The man is spending mega $$$ on her clothes, rent and car payments.

Hot women do not fuck obese men without something of far greater value in return, in this case LOTS OF $$$ you throw at her, and she controls you and does what she pleases.

Don't kid yourself, love handles are NOT attractive to women, and if you are broke, good luck finding hot (non-pro) women to fuck with 30LBS of subcutaneous fat around your waistline, and man boobs.


Mixx

You're taking what I wrote to a ridiculous extreme. I didn't say women like "obese" men. Obese is a long way from a "big" guy. My point is that he doesn't have to look like a male model, just be in decent shape. And I've found LOTS of women that like a large-framed man. The man is already losing tons of weight and working out, and my advice to him is to not to let the fact that he's heavier than he'd like to be stop him from talking to women.

[MiXX]

(12-20-2011 02:08 PM)Timoteo Wrote:  

Obese is a long way from a "big" guy.

Not trying to be a wise-ass, honestly, but what you wrote is equivalent to what fat women call being "plus size"...it's being fat, let's be real.

what the heck is a "big guy"? Unless you ar talking big in height, I cannot see how a guy that is 5'10" be BIG unless he was a) extremely muscular to the point of competition, or b) just plain fat.

(12-20-2011 02:08 PM)Timoteo Wrote:  

My point is that he doesn't have to look like a male model, just be in decent shape.

Point taken.


Mixx

[Timoteo]

(12-20-2011 02:24 PM)MiXX Wrote:  

(12-20-2011 02:08 PM)Timoteo Wrote:  

Obese is a long way from a "big" guy.

Not trying to be a wise-ass, honestly, but what you wrote is equivalent to what fat women call being "plus size"...it's being fat, let's be real.

what the heck is a "big guy"? Unless you ar talking big in height, I cannot see how a guy that is 5'10" be BIG unless he was a) extremely muscular to the point of competition, or b) just plain fat.

(12-20-2011 02:08 PM)Timoteo Wrote:  

My point is that he doesn't have to look like a male model, just be in decent shape.

Point taken.


Mixx

Some men are just on a larger frame. They may have reasonable body fat content, be in good shape, not particularly cut, but are simply big and broad.

[WesternCancer]

(12-20-2011 02:01 PM)MiXX Wrote:  

(12-20-2011 01:09 PM)Timoteo Wrote:  

I've found that a lot of women out there LIKE a big guy...

Let me finish that sentence for you.

like a bug guy {with money}

The only reason hot women date overweight men is because they are either controlling the relationship in every angle, or b) The man is spending mega $$$ on her clothes, rent and car payments.

Hot women do not fuck obese men without something of far greater value in return, in this case LOTS OF $$$ you throw at her, and she controls you and does what she pleases.

Don't kid yourself, love handles are NOT attractive to women, and if you are broke, good luck finding hot (non-pro) women to fuck with 30LBS of subcutaneous fat around your waistline, and man boobs.


Mixx

Game can trump your weight unless you're over like 250 +6ft (of fat). I had the hottest girlfriend out of any of my friends (7.5-8) and still had man-boobs + i had some big beta tendencies. I've gained insight into game and have lost a bunch of weight from then however.

[bengalltigerr]

(03-03-2011 10:59 AM)MiXX Wrote:  

It's no doubt that being overweight not only hits your confidence levels, but also your health. It's OK you are going to a GYM, but make sure that your diet is 100% accurate. You can plan to spend hours in the gym, and see little or very slow results if you are not eating the right combination of foods: Fruits, Proteins, FAT, Green Veggies and WATER, and eating them at the right tomes and portions. I would see a nutritionist too, not just a personal trainer in a gym.

My recommendation: Your health is more important than any piece of ass out there. Take the next 3 months to focus ONLY on yourself - forget women. Give yourself 3 months, and after you trim 60lbs of body fat, and gain 20lbs of muscle, you will see how women will come naturally to you - without any game at all!

There is a thread open on nutrition and ecerice already - post your comments there.

Mixx

I completely agree with Mixx. Being overweight is a dangerous condition, the guy should focus on losng weight first and game later.

[kosko]

I notice brothers can get away with being big. A lot of my bigger homies run good game and scoop nice broads they still eat like shit and stuff though. Brothers can get away being big more so then other races, not sure why though. But IMO if a big dude any race has style, is clean and well groomed ( I think this is biggest thing that works against big dudes, if your lazy.. unkept and a slob girls will run away), has game and high value he will be able to game with the best of them.

If you are confident you should be loosing the weight for your health and own positive benefits.

[bengalltigerr]

why would you want to stay fat when you can lose weight and become healthy?