[Handsome Creepy Eel]

Because women often lose interest in you if you don't bang them on the first date. They begin to think of you as "obviously not Alpha" for not escalating to sex, and go bang someone else who will.

The same thing used to be happening with kiss on the first date 10 or 15 years ago - now it's about sex. It's an arms race.

[reaper23]

(06-19-2014 12:34 PM)Handsome Creepy Eel Wrote:  

Because women often lose interest in you if you don't bang them on the first date. They begin to think of you as "obviously not Alpha" for not escalating to sex, and go bang someone else who will.

The same thing used to be happening with kiss on the first date 10 or 15 years ago - now it's about sex. It's an arms race.

eh, i think thats a projection based on personal experience.

i think pressing or being very obviously focused on fucking her is more of a sign of weakness than sitting back, doing your thing, going with the flow, reading her appropriately and exhibiting an abundance induced patience.

there are plenty enough ways to show you're a man about business without pushing hard for sex on a first date.

it happens plenty enough for me but i honestly DGAF if it does or doesn't. when you have four or five other women out of which one would show up with an hour of calling them for sex, it just doesn't matter. and sex with one of the regulars is usually better than sex with a new girl even if she is hotter. for me anyway.

i like drinks out for date 1. then drinks at my place date 2 and proceed with sex.

[robreke]

(06-18-2014 11:14 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I met her in a coffee shop. All her texts leading to the date had ! ...single exclamations and a few smiley faces.

Good, so she knows what she was actually getting!

As for the text sign language, clearly you are younger than me. I don't see the significance here. Especially if you don't have a demonstrated text relationship which might shed light on how she uses text.

People I barely know have no problem being informal and using emoji's. I'm not hip enough to discern whether that means anything.

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I think either it's that she just wanted attention from a guy she was attracted to .....or I should have just pulled her close as soon as we walked in and tried to fuck her.

For me at least, since I'm not jacked, Caveman style is always a gamble. If you are jacked, on some level she's interested in seeing your muscle work and feeling your strength. That's that animal attraction, and it's a big weapon in a player's arsenal. And by all means, if you've got it, flaunt it.

That being said, I'm not trying to make anyone feel uncomfortable or threatened.

Fear of my presence is not part of my game.
Fear of my absence is.

When the chick is being as generally unresponsive as you describe, the last thing I'm going to do is go all 50 Shades of Grey. In my view, she wasn't showing submission, but she was showing indifference at best, or amused mastery at worst. Like you were a little plaything, and she could be as pleasant as she wanted to be, but no more.

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I'm the one that suggested she sit in the chair...as I'm currently living in a extended stay motel while my house gets renovated.

You mentioned this in a different post.

Out of curiosity, when did you mention this, and how did you bring it up?

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

So....instead of telling her to "sit" or "get" on the bed..the only other option as there's no couch....which I thought would be too much ( I know beta )....I told her to take a seat in the chair and I sat in a chair next to her first. I guess I could have just said "make yourself comfortable" and see what she decided to do.

It's a tough call.

I don't think you were dealing with a chick that likes to be ordered around and told what to do.

What should have happened, no matter where she sat, she should have sidled up to you. If she was digging you. Or at least made herself available for that.

It's true you have to lead, lead, lead. But she was to want to be led.

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I felt kind of like a teenagers awkwardly groping the girl next door for a kiss after a while....and not like a man making a woman melt before him. this was due to her indifference

I guess I need to get better at making sexual undertones in our talk pre-bounce to the casa. ( or in my case la motel )....at the restaurant she was talking her head off about her party days as a younger girl, what her social life is like now...what her 4th july plans are yada yada. as I randomly kino'ed nodded and made supplementary comments and witticisms. She's a bit of a social butterfly/wine drinker/ definite extrovert/ fitness instructor/school teacher out for summer break. Short little ball of energy.

See that's an interesting point that you should have mentioned.

Fitness instructor? Very active? Former party girl?

How did you integrate that information into your rap?

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

Oh well...who knows if there'll be a second. She did make a point to tell me she enjoyed the date and "had a good time" two or more times on the drive back. Will give her a one day gap then send a comfort text tomorrow if I don't hear from her.

Lemme clarify a point. What I'm suggesting is to speed up the time table of the seduction, of the sex.

In terms of the sex/relationship, all might not be lost, but this is just regular seduction not FAST seduction. You could bang her, but it will be on her schedule.

That's not a problem if you have a lot of chicks in the pipeline. And having other chicks is the definition of Alpha in this situation. You won't be tempted to go all soft when she finally opens her legs, cause you're dance card is full.

Keep fighting the good fight.

WIA

I'm not jacked either...but I am tall and have kind of wide shoulders. A lot of shorter people defer to me it seems and she's short for a girl...about 5'3 or so.

I did bring up living in a motel during our drinks. I brought it up when she asked me where I lived. I told her my neighborhood...then my current living situation. And...when I suggested we go somewhere else...I said...yeah, we can go check out my fancy hotel rooms and all the cool channels...or some such. She agreed to it.
Once we got there...she asked me a bit about my house and questions like that as if she wanted to make sure I owned a house I guess.

As far as how I integrated this stuff in the conversation about her being alpha/party girl...I said stuff like " well aren't you the social butterfly" " you seem like a free spirit" at one point I told her "you're trouble" she seemed to take it in good spirit.
another thing...and I think it was a shit test....when I was taking her home...out of the blue...she said....I think I may dye my hair pink. I paused and told her I liked her blonde hair....but in retrospect I probably should have said something like....yeah, cool...it's a free country"
She probably just wanted to see how I would react to such a ridiculous suggestion.
I'll be texting her this p.m. we'll see how it goes.
Btw...I do have other dates with other girls lined up )

[Moma]

(06-19-2014 12:34 PM)Handsome Creepy Eel Wrote:  

Because women often lose interest in you if you don't bang them on the first date. They begin to think of you as "obviously not Alpha" for not escalating to sex, and go bang someone else who will.

The same thing used to be happening with kiss on the first date 10 or 15 years ago - now it's about sex. It's an arms race.

Eel is right. Maybe you live in Asia or Eastern Europe etc but in the West, most lizards especially in highly feminist cities need a quick close or you very likely could lose them.

To quote something el mechanico reinforced to me, once your penis enters her vagina, you have won. Bang her and then you can control the interaction going forward. If you choose to take it slow after that, you can. If you want to be on your way, you can.

Times are not like they used to be when you can drag out interactions.

I had my one shot at a very different group for me to close and I was in the same situation. The lizard was as cold as a stalactite. She let me kiss but didn't respond to anything. In retrospective, I should have pulled out the hammer and nailed her but I've never been aroused by unresponsive lizards and I doubt I would have been steel for the battle.

She never came back for a round two. One shot is all we get in feminist cities.

[reaper23]

(06-20-2014 07:38 AM)Moma Wrote:  

(06-19-2014 12:34 PM)Handsome Creepy Eel Wrote:  

Because women often lose interest in you if you don't bang them on the first date. They begin to think of you as "obviously not Alpha" for not escalating to sex, and go bang someone else who will.

The same thing used to be happening with kiss on the first date 10 or 15 years ago - now it's about sex. It's an arms race.

Eel is right. Maybe you live in Asia or Eastern Europe etc but in the West, most lizards especially in highly feminist cities need a quick close or you very likely could lose them.

To quote something el mechanico reinforced to me, once your penis enters her vagina, you have won. Bang her and then you can control the interaction going forward. If you choose to take it slow after that, you can. If you want to be on your way, you can.

Times are not like they used to be when you can drag out interactions.

I had my one shot at a very different group for me to close and I was in the same situation. The lizard was as cold as a stalactite. She let me kiss but didn't respond to anything. In retrospective, I should have pulled out the hammer and nailed her but I've never been aroused by unresponsive lizards and I doubt I would have been steel for the battle.

She never came back for a round two. One shot is all we get in feminist cities.

I live in washington dc. and i'm just saying, from my experience, sex on the first date has little to no correlation with future sex in a positive way. whereas, I can point to many instances where sex on the first date has a negative correlation to future sex.

one night stands are not my goal. my goal is creating a relationship with a woman that offers me sex on numerous occasions over the next several months while i have the same relationship with many women at the same time.

[reaper23]

if you dont "seem" alpha enough because you didnt try to bang her on the first date then you're not doing all the rest of the things right. she should sense your status and dominance without having to fuck.

if getting sex is your only way of making her feel like you're worthy then you need to consider other elements of your game and lifestyle in general

[Moma]

Reaper, if I make a lizard cum on the first hit, I rarely get an instance where she won't let me hit it again and again. Maybe it's a testimony to my hit skills or maybe not..I don't think myself as that special, I don't lick or do handstands..I just stroke and buss but that's just how it has been played out.

Even feminist city Toronto..a lot of the more difficult lizards..when I hit them fast and early, they were in my pocket till I got bored...