[Mr. Butterworth]

@Beginner:

YaMan pretty much said what was needed.

I always meet them somewhere close by their places so there's no issue with finding place or it being "too far"... I perfer to be the one to get "lost" or what have you (she's waiting on you now)..

Also, I've come to believe a women is more comfy (feels safe) at her place oppose to yours (strange guy. don't know what's in his "cave").. panties come off WAY FASTER in my opinion.. and if you're doing a good job of making her feeling relaxed and safe on the date. she has no problem letting you in her spot..

I pick them up at their place sometimes too but it's rare for me. actually I've only pick up one chick at her place this year on a first date (fucked her good and hard later that night)

hope that helped

[Pyre]

It's not your fault if you did the best you can do.

[TheDealCloser]

I've had many SNLs but far more first date lays. A chick will usually leave her bitch shield at home once she is alone and comfortable with you. Don't forget to keep your mouthpiece (game) is flowing nicely. Let her game you, ie; re-qualify herself. Maintain strong eye contact also. Getting back to your place should be no problem once she is fully committed. Tell her you two are going to another bar (your place) for one last drink. She will go with you! Just continue your gentle verbal and physical assault along the way. Kissing/Ass grabbing, you know what to do. If you can't close then... she is bleeding most likely. BJ time.

-TheDealCloser

[YaManBT]

(12-04-2013 09:07 PM)Beginner Wrote:  

Nice write up YaMan. Did you escalate to make out at the venues or did you wait until you got to her place?

I waited until I got to her place. I basically used Tuthmosis' First Date Bang Recipe, but just modified it so that we'd end up at her place, and not mine.

Here's Tuth's Recipe. Easily one of the all-time great threads.
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-8681.html

[TrueSlyr]

(12-04-2013 03:59 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

(12-04-2013 03:53 PM)frenchie Wrote:  

(12-02-2013 09:42 PM)Valhalla Wrote:  

Game has led men to incorrectly believe they can control the outcome

SO true.

You only have so much power. This isn't a video game where if you say the right combination of words the pants will drop.

However, you can control your Game.

For example, there is nothing forcing you to use "Watch TV" as your close.

I mean, hell, I just got sleepy reading that close.

whats your close to bring them back to your place?

[birdrussell]

It happens all the time. Chicks are motivated by their feelings. It might be as simple as she feels fat or, your belt didn't matches your shoes is one I've heard. I know chick that tells a story about how she was about to let these 2 Swedish guys spit roast her but decided against it because her room was dirty. That said props to everyone whose been saying give a better reason. Find out what she's into, think up some similar stuff that you have at your place and tell her maybe she'll get to see it. Like she hasn't lived up to the honor yet.

[bodmon]

no, not at all. but it is your fault is you don't get a makeout on the first date. though it's small in the scheme of things, i think the ability to consistently get the makeout on the first meeting or date is the basic mark of a guy who's experienced with women vs a guy who lucks into the occasional date. if you manage isolation, gain attraction, and have a killer instinct, then it's yours for the taking.

[soup]

If you are a player, it is.

[scotian]

(12-08-2013 04:16 AM)soup Wrote:  

If you are a player, it is.

If you have some roofies, its not.

[soup]

(12-08-2013 04:51 AM)scotian Wrote:  

(12-08-2013 04:16 AM)soup Wrote:  

If you are a player, it is.

If you have some roofies, its not.

Roofies aren't game.

[Handsome Creepy Eel]

(12-08-2013 04:51 AM)scotian Wrote:  

(12-08-2013 04:16 AM)soup Wrote:  

If you are a player, it is.

If you have some roofies, its not.

[thegmanifesto]

(12-06-2013 09:58 PM)TrueSlyr Wrote:  

(12-04-2013 03:59 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

(12-04-2013 03:53 PM)frenchie Wrote:  

(12-02-2013 09:42 PM)Valhalla Wrote:  

Game has led men to incorrectly believe they can control the outcome

SO true.

You only have so much power. This isn't a video game where if you say the right combination of words the pants will drop.

However, you can control your Game.

For example, there is nothing forcing you to use "Watch TV" as your close.

I mean, hell, I just got sleepy reading that close.

whats your close to bring them back to your place?

Check my blog or do a search on here.

Probably written 30 pages on closing.

Enough for an E-book.

[robreke]

Can it be a mistake to go for a bang on the first date? Are some girls just the type that 'don't do that' on a first date and if you try...you come across sleazy. In other words, it would have been better to just played it cool....slightly interested on the first date. (almost seems blue pill to ask ) but I'm wondering.

I just had a date tonight. Girl was talking her head off...had drunk a few glasses of wine. A little kino....I couldn't tell if she was interested. I suggested a bounce and she agreed. I said we could go to my place and she said 'whatever you want'....I started to get a little hard right there.
When I got her to my place...she curled up in a chair...we messed around with her iphone play list. I'd go to hold hands. "your hands are cold"....she was talking and open...blah blah. She let me rub her arms some but didn't return it. Hard to escalate. I moved to the couch/bed and laid down. Come over here and watch tv with me I say. She laid next to me with her blanket. I was rubbing touching her....no response. I kissed her cheek. No response...she looked at the tv. wtf? She does have to work early in the morning and was even talking about that on the way to my place. she finally says...I really do have to get home.
So...I take her. Tells me she has a good time several times we talk a lot on way to her car ....says she's sending me a hate text tomorrow for keeping her out....says it in jest. She asked questions about my former marriage. Told me she 'doesn't kiss' on first dates. ....and was talking about a 5 yr relationship she just got out of. I walk her to car and she gets in....no hug or kiss. She smiles and says goodnight. So....why does she even let me bring her back to my place? Maybe she's not a first bang kind of girl....and innocently thought I wouldn't try anything. Maybe not attracted but why go to my place in the first place? That's why I ask the first question.....maybe girls like this need to be played more 'gentlemanly" ?

[Jestx]

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

Can it be a mistake to go for a bang on the first date? Are some girls just the type that 'don't do that' on a first date and if you try...you come across sleazy. In other words, it would have been better to just played it cool....slightly interested on the first date. (almost seems blue pill to ask ) but I'm wondering.

I just had a date tonight. Girl was talking her head off...had drunk a few glasses of wine. A little kino....I couldn't tell if she was interested. I suggested a bounce and she agreed. I said we could go to my place and she said 'whatever you want'....I started to get a little hard right there.
When I got her to my place...she curled up in a chair...we messed around with her iphone play list. I'd go to hold hands. "your hands are cold"....she was talking and open...blah blah. She let me rub her arms some but didn't return it. Hard to escalate. I moved to the couch/bed and laid down. Come over here and watch tv with me I say. She laid next to me with her blanket. I was rubbing touching her....no response. I kissed her cheek. No response...she looked at the tv. wtf? She does have to work early in the morning and was even talking about that on the way to my place. she finally says...I really do have to get home.
So...I take her. Tells me she has a good time several times we talk a lot on way to her car ....says she's sending me a hate text tomorrow for keeping her out....says it in jest. She asked questions about my former marriage. Told me she 'doesn't kiss' on first dates. ....and was talking about a 5 yr relationship she just got out of. I walk her to car and she gets in....no hug or kiss. She smiles and says goodnight. So....why does she even let me bring her back to my place? Maybe she's not a first bang kind of girl....and innocently thought I wouldn't try anything. Maybe not attracted but why go to my place in the first place? That's why I ask the first question.....maybe girls like this need to be played more 'gentlemanly" ?

She wanted you to fuck her but you weren't alpha enough to just grab her and get started so she got bored and left. I know because this has happened to me.

[WestIndianArchie]

Just going on what you've told us.

And keep in mind, you haven't told us much about the front end of the date.

How you met (lemme guess, online. Where she made a decision based on a picture, not by seeing you up close, being in your presence, smelling your cologne..)

Where you went
What you talked about
When the touch barrier was broken

We just have what you've told us about the extraction.

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

Can it be a mistake to go for a bang on the first date?

No.

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

Are some girls just the type that 'don't do that' on a first date and if you try...you come across sleazy. In other words, it would have been better to just played it cool....slightly interested on the first date. (almost seems blue pill to ask ) but I'm wondering.

Bad game comes off as sleazy. You come off as pressed, and the whole thing looks like you basically conned her and then pressured her into sleeping with her.

Good game is creating a fun little world for your naughty little minx. You take two steps forward, and then one step back.
You remember the 15 minute rule, she's ready to go 15 minutes after you are.

Good game, she wants to bang. She's so turned on, she's safe, and the environment allows her to be free.

Her rules go out the window for the right guy. And she's such a good judge of character....

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I just had a date tonight. Girl was talking her head off...had drunk a few glasses of wine. A little kino....I couldn't tell if she was interested.

I couldn't tell if she was interested.

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I suggested a bounce and she agreed. I said we could go to my place and she said 'whatever you want'....I started to get a little hard right there.
When I got her to my place...she curled up in a chair...we messed around with her iphone play list. I'd go to hold hands. "your hands are cold"....she was talking and open...blah blah. She let me rub her arms some but didn't return it.

She let me rub her arms some but didn't return it.

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

Hard to escalate. I moved to the couch/bed and laid down. Come over here and watch tv with me I say. She laid next to me with her blanket. I was rubbing touching her....no response. I kissed her cheek. No response...she looked at the tv. wtf? She does have to work early in the morning and was even talking about that on the way to my place. she finally says...I really do have to get home.

I was rubbing touching her....no response.

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

So...I take her. Tells me she has a good time several times we talk a lot on way to her car ....says she's sending me a hate text tomorrow for keeping her out....says it in jest. She asked questions about my former marriage. Told me she 'doesn't kiss' on first dates. ....and was talking about a 5 yr relationship she just got out of. I walk her to car and she gets in....no hug or kiss. She smiles and says goodnight. So....why does she even let me bring her back to my place? Maybe she's not a first bang kind of girl....and innocently thought I wouldn't try anything. Maybe not attracted but why go to my place in the first place? That's why I ask the first question.....maybe girls like this need to be played more 'gentlemanly" ?

She wasn't interested in the bang, she was just interested in the company.

I like that you weren't pressed when you go into your spot. Kudos!

But the second that she curled up in a chair was the second you should have realized that she's not ready for sex. A girl that comes to your place, if she's interested in banging, but not ready right that second, sits close to you. She wants to bask in your warmth.

When they sit away from you, they're not interested in being close to you, either because she's afraid of the sex, or she's not as in to you as you think she is.

In terms of your moves, you went from holding hands to snuggling to kissing her cheek. That's kinda weak sauce comrade.

Where's the spark? Where's the heat? I'm definitely not saying you need to pin her up against the wall the second your front door closes. That's a 3rd or 4th date move....

Furthermore, I didn't read anything about you getting her mind interested in sex.

Basically she may be attracted to you, but she wasn't aroused enough to act on that attraction. Even though her inhibitions may have been lowered.

Pretty much everything you did, you kinda had to drag her.
The fact that she's coming out of a relationship, may have made it easier for you to lead, get some compliance, but not necessarily arousal.

On one level, she basically played you. It would have been perfectly acceptable for her to insist on you taking her home and calling it a night. That's what a good woman does.

But instead she went to your spot and basically teased you. (She'll never see it that way, of course)

Even if she didn't suspect you were after the bang, she should have gotten the picture when touching, hugging, and kissing started.

It could be that you misread her interest in coming to your spot.
It could be that something she noticed at your place turned her off.
She could just be a broken human.

Possibly there was some bad game.

Maybe you should have went for the lips instead of the cheek to gauge her heat level towards you - but based on everything you told us about the extraction, there should have been more response from her.

Now if she says doesn't kiss on first dates, she really had no business coming to your place at all. That's the fucked up part to me.

And the fact that she mentions it after you tried to get things popping, is really just icing on the cake. She wants to rub your nose in it.

You might be dealing with "rules" type girl. She doesn't kiss/bang/anal on the first date. She likes to tease and control men. (wonder why her 5 year relationship didn't keep going...hmmm)

The test could be the other way. Maybe she was expecting you to be a fucking animal once you got behind closed doors.

Arguably she's exercising some self control. good for her.
But she's controlling you. And she's doing it with glee. (my read of course)

And if she's doing it by staying distant, not being emotionally present with you, that's a preview into the future.

This is the kind of person you're dealing with, the kind of person that can shut off her feelings even though you're trying to connect with her.

Keep that in mind. This is the true nature of woman, self interested with no empathy. I understand that she doesn't want to spread them legs for every Tom, Dick, and Jamal. But she didn't have to make you drive home, then drive her home, and then you drive back home. She didn't need to put you in that position at all.

The real question is how do play it?

In terms of getting another outing, as usual it's up to her.

(Really the best thing you can do is go out with a different chick before you see her again)

So if you do get her out, the tendency for most players is to try and either be more aggressive this time or snarky/passive aggressive.

I can't read minds, but I know that women often view your actions and reactions through a lens. So if she interprets what you do on the next date as you being a bit butt hurt about the last date, guess what happens after that? You get screened out.

So the gambit here is to make her chase you.

To make her seek our approval.
To give your approval sparingly.
To challenge her.
To be disinterested.
To show her that other chicks want you. (it'd be great to take her to your stronghold, where the people know you, they want to hear your stories, the girls in the spot say hello to you - I'm not saying every problem can be solved by "Lock it Down" game, but this is one of em)

Basically you have to remind her why she wanted to go out with you in the first place.

That's the mental component.

The verbal component is where you can play the questions game. *word to Krauser for reminding me of this one

You start innocuous questions, "Have you ever been on a hot air balloon" and she has to ask you a totally different question.

Well each question ramps up the sexuality.
It need no be explicit. But it must be obvious.

The other side of it is the physical aspect.

The kino shouldn't be lovey-dovey girlfriend and boyfriend kino.

You're leading her around on the next date.
Grabbing her hand, not holding her hand.
Moving her by her hips.
Putting her on the couch.
Laying her legs across yours. (which I totally hate)

So Mental, Verbal, Kino.

Strategy - Now if your bankroll is cool, and you've got sufficient time, you can wait this broad out if she's hot enough. If she's not ball achingly hot, don't spend more than another date or 2 on her.

I waited on a chick for like 2 months, but best believe I was with plenty of other chicks in the meantime.

The indifference to her antics, the actual competition and imagined competition made it a slam dunk by the time I got it popping.

WIA

[Benoit]

(06-18-2014 02:57 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

Now if she says doesn't kiss on first dates, she really had no business coming to your place at all. That's the fucked up part to me.

I would throw her out at that point.

Say "Then you should go" and push her out the door. No calling a taxi, no pleasantries. Total asshole game. I'm not prepared to deal with timewasters.

[Saweeep]

Soup was right last year. If you don't get the bang on the first date you're not quite there yet.

Maybe more experience allows you to filter the girls we are looking for before we even get to 1st dates.

[soup]

You chose your own battles. Game is a game of chance despite all of out attempts to increase our odds.

The fault is not in her not banging you but to feel like there is any fault at all.

If you had a hundred other girls you could hit up at the moment, it would not matter so much what one girl did or didn't do.

The fault here is not having abundance mentality.

[robreke]

(06-18-2014 02:57 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

Just going on what you've told us.

And keep in mind, you haven't told us much about the front end of the date.

How you met (lemme guess, online. Where she made a decision based on a picture, not by seeing you up close, being in your presence, smelling your cologne..)

Where you went
What you talked about
When the touch barrier was broken

We just have what you've told us about the extraction.

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

Can it be a mistake to go for a bang on the first date?

No.

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

Are some girls just the type that 'don't do that' on a first date and if you try...you come across sleazy. In other words, it would have been better to just played it cool....slightly interested on the first date. (almost seems blue pill to ask ) but I'm wondering.

Bad game comes off as sleazy. You come off as pressed, and the whole thing looks like you basically conned her and then pressured her into sleeping with her.

Good game is creating a fun little world for your naughty little minx. You take two steps forward, and then one step back.
You remember the 15 minute rule, she's ready to go 15 minutes after you are.

Good game, she wants to bang. She's so turned on, she's safe, and the environment allows her to be free.

Her rules go out the window for the right guy. And she's such a good judge of character....

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I just had a date tonight. Girl was talking her head off...had drunk a few glasses of wine. A little kino....I couldn't tell if she was interested.

I couldn't tell if she was interested.

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I suggested a bounce and she agreed. I said we could go to my place and she said 'whatever you want'....I started to get a little hard right there.
When I got her to my place...she curled up in a chair...we messed around with her iphone play list. I'd go to hold hands. "your hands are cold"....she was talking and open...blah blah. She let me rub her arms some but didn't return it.

She let me rub her arms some but didn't return it.

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

Hard to escalate. I moved to the couch/bed and laid down. Come over here and watch tv with me I say. She laid next to me with her blanket. I was rubbing touching her....no response. I kissed her cheek. No response...she looked at the tv. wtf? She does have to work early in the morning and was even talking about that on the way to my place. she finally says...I really do have to get home.

I was rubbing touching her....no response.

(06-18-2014 12:01 AM)robreke Wrote:  

So...I take her. Tells me she has a good time several times we talk a lot on way to her car ....says she's sending me a hate text tomorrow for keeping her out....says it in jest. She asked questions about my former marriage. Told me she 'doesn't kiss' on first dates. ....and was talking about a 5 yr relationship she just got out of. I walk her to car and she gets in....no hug or kiss. She smiles and says goodnight. So....why does she even let me bring her back to my place? Maybe she's not a first bang kind of girl....and innocently thought I wouldn't try anything. Maybe not attracted but why go to my place in the first place? That's why I ask the first question.....maybe girls like this need to be played more 'gentlemanly" ?

She wasn't interested in the bang, she was just interested in the company.

I like that you weren't pressed when you go into your spot. Kudos!

But the second that she curled up in a chair was the second you should have realized that she's not ready for sex. A girl that comes to your place, if she's interested in banging, but not ready right that second, sits close to you. She wants to bask in your warmth.

When they sit away from you, they're not interested in being close to you, either because she's afraid of the sex, or she's not as in to you as you think she is.

In terms of your moves, you went from holding hands to snuggling to kissing her cheek. That's kinda weak sauce comrade.

Where's the spark? Where's the heat? I'm definitely not saying you need to pin her up against the wall the second your front door closes. That's a 3rd or 4th date move....

Furthermore, I didn't read anything about you getting her mind interested in sex.

Basically she may be attracted to you, but she wasn't aroused enough to act on that attraction. Even though her inhibitions may have been lowered.

Pretty much everything you did, you kinda had to drag her.
The fact that she's coming out of a relationship, may have made it easier for you to lead, get some compliance, but not necessarily arousal.

On one level, she basically played you. It would have been perfectly acceptable for her to insist on you taking her home and calling it a night. That's what a good woman does.

But instead she went to your spot and basically teased you. (She'll never see it that way, of course)

Even if she didn't suspect you were after the bang, she should have gotten the picture when touching, hugging, and kissing started.

It could be that you misread her interest in coming to your spot.
It could be that something she noticed at your place turned her off.
She could just be a broken human.

Possibly there was some bad game.

Maybe you should have went for the lips instead of the cheek to gauge her heat level towards you - but based on everything you told us about the extraction, there should have been more response from her.

Now if she says doesn't kiss on first dates, she really had no business coming to your place at all. That's the fucked up part to me.

And the fact that she mentions it after you tried to get things popping, is really just icing on the cake. She wants to rub your nose in it.

You might be dealing with "rules" type girl. She doesn't kiss/bang/anal on the first date. She likes to tease and control men. (wonder why her 5 year relationship didn't keep going...hmmm)

The test could be the other way. Maybe she was expecting you to be a fucking animal once you got behind closed doors.

Arguably she's exercising some self control. good for her.
But she's controlling you. And she's doing it with glee. (my read of course)

And if she's doing it by staying distant, not being emotionally present with you, that's a preview into the future.

This is the kind of person you're dealing with, the kind of person that can shut off her feelings even though you're trying to connect with her.

Keep that in mind. This is the true nature of woman, self interested with no empathy. I understand that she doesn't want to spread them legs for every Tom, Dick, and Jamal. But she didn't have to make you drive home, then drive her home, and then you drive back home. She didn't need to put you in that position at all.

The real question is how do play it?

In terms of getting another outing, as usual it's up to her.

(Really the best thing you can do is go out with a different chick before you see her again)

So if you do get her out, the tendency for most players is to try and either be more aggressive this time or snarky/passive aggressive.

I can't read minds, but I know that women often view your actions and reactions through a lens. So if she interprets what you do on the next date as you being a bit butt hurt about the last date, guess what happens after that? You get screened out.

So the gambit here is to make her chase you.

To make her seek our approval.
To give your approval sparingly.
To challenge her.
To be disinterested.
To show her that other chicks want you. (it'd be great to take her to your stronghold, where the people know you, they want to hear your stories, the girls in the spot say hello to you - I'm not saying every problem can be solved by "Lock it Down" game, but this is one of em)

Basically you have to remind her why she wanted to go out with you in the first place.

That's the mental component.

The verbal component is where you can play the questions game. *word to Krauser for reminding me of this one

You start innocuous questions, "Have you ever been on a hot air balloon" and she has to ask you a totally different question.

Well each question ramps up the sexuality.
It need no be explicit. But it must be obvious.

The other side of it is the physical aspect.

The kino shouldn't be lovey-dovey girlfriend and boyfriend kino.

You're leading her around on the next date.
Grabbing her hand, not holding her hand.
Moving her by her hips.
Putting her on the couch.
Laying her legs across yours. (which I totally hate)

So Mental, Verbal, Kino.

Strategy - Now if your bankroll is cool, and you've got sufficient time, you can wait this broad out if she's hot enough. If she's not ball achingly hot, don't spend more than another date or 2 on her.

I waited on a chick for like 2 months, but best believe I was with plenty of other chicks in the meantime.

The indifference to her antics, the actual competition and imagined competition made it a slam dunk by the time I got it popping.

WIA

I met her in a coffee shop. All her texts leading to the date had ! ...single exclamations and a few smiley faces.

I think either it's that she just wanted attention from a guy she was attracted to .....or I should have just pulled her close as soon as we walked in and tried to fuck her.

I'm the one that suggested she sit in the chair...as I'm currently living in a extended stay motel while my house gets renovated. So....instead of telling her to "sit" or "get" on the bed..the only other option as there's no couch....which I thought would be too much ( I know beta )....I told her to take a seat in the chair and I sat in a chair next to her first. I guess I could have just said "make yourself comfortable" and see what she decided to do.

I felt kind of like a teenagers awkwardly groping the girl next door for a kiss after a while....and not like a man making a woman melt before him. this was due to her indifference

I guess I need to get better at making sexual undertones in our talk pre-bounce to the casa. ( or in my case la motel )....at the restaurant she was talking her head off about her party days as a younger girl, what her social life is like now...what her 4th july plans are yada yada. as I randomly kino'ed nodded and made supplementary comments and witticisms. She's a bit of a social butterfly/wine drinker/ definite extrovert/ fitness instructor/school teacher out for summer break. Short little ball of energy.

Oh well...who knows if there'll be a second. She did make a point to tell me she enjoyed the date and "had a good time" two or more times on the drive back. Will give her a one day gap then send a comfort text tomorrow if I don't hear from her.

[WestIndianArchie]

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I met her in a coffee shop. All her texts leading to the date had ! ...single exclamations and a few smiley faces.

Good, so she knows what she was actually getting!

As for the text sign language, clearly you are younger than me. I don't see the significance here. Especially if you don't have a demonstrated text relationship which might shed light on how she uses text.

People I barely know have no problem being informal and using emoji's. I'm not hip enough to discern whether that means anything.

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I think either it's that she just wanted attention from a guy she was attracted to .....or I should have just pulled her close as soon as we walked in and tried to fuck her.

For me at least, since I'm not jacked, Caveman style is always a gamble. If you are jacked, on some level she's interested in seeing your muscle work and feeling your strength. That's that animal attraction, and it's a big weapon in a player's arsenal. And by all means, if you've got it, flaunt it.

That being said, I'm not trying to make anyone feel uncomfortable or threatened.

Fear of my presence is not part of my game.
Fear of my absence is.

When the chick is being as generally unresponsive as you describe, the last thing I'm going to do is go all 50 Shades of Grey. In my view, she wasn't showing submission, but she was showing indifference at best, or amused mastery at worst. Like you were a little plaything, and she could be as pleasant as she wanted to be, but no more.

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I'm the one that suggested she sit in the chair...as I'm currently living in a extended stay motel while my house gets renovated.

You mentioned this in a different post.

Out of curiosity, when did you mention this, and how did you bring it up?

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

So....instead of telling her to "sit" or "get" on the bed..the only other option as there's no couch....which I thought would be too much ( I know beta )....I told her to take a seat in the chair and I sat in a chair next to her first. I guess I could have just said "make yourself comfortable" and see what she decided to do.

It's a tough call.

I don't think you were dealing with a chick that likes to be ordered around and told what to do.

What should have happened, no matter where she sat, she should have sidled up to you. If she was digging you. Or at least made herself available for that.

It's true you have to lead, lead, lead. But she was to want to be led.

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

I felt kind of like a teenagers awkwardly groping the girl next door for a kiss after a while....and not like a man making a woman melt before him. this was due to her indifference

I guess I need to get better at making sexual undertones in our talk pre-bounce to the casa. ( or in my case la motel )....at the restaurant she was talking her head off about her party days as a younger girl, what her social life is like now...what her 4th july plans are yada yada. as I randomly kino'ed nodded and made supplementary comments and witticisms. She's a bit of a social butterfly/wine drinker/ definite extrovert/ fitness instructor/school teacher out for summer break. Short little ball of energy.

See that's an interesting point that you should have mentioned.

Fitness instructor? Very active? Former party girl?

How did you integrate that information into your rap?

(06-18-2014 10:03 AM)robreke Wrote:  

Oh well...who knows if there'll be a second. She did make a point to tell me she enjoyed the date and "had a good time" two or more times on the drive back. Will give her a one day gap then send a comfort text tomorrow if I don't hear from her.

Lemme clarify a point. What I'm suggesting is to speed up the time table of the seduction, of the sex.

In terms of the sex/relationship, all might not be lost, but this is just regular seduction not FAST seduction. You could bang her, but it will be on her schedule.

That's not a problem if you have a lot of chicks in the pipeline. And having other chicks is the definition of Alpha in this situation. You won't be tempted to go all soft when she finally opens her legs, cause you're dance card is full.

Keep fighting the good fight.

WIA

[heavy]

Maybe it's God's fault. Maybe she won't bang you because you're paraplegic...

or if you aren't paraplegic, maybe it's because you aren't funny enough, who knows?

[VincentVinturi]

If you do everything in your power to get the lay but it isn't happening then there's nothing to be done. If you pull out every last stop in the LMR book and she won't cave then fuck it, you did your job.

[travolta]

(12-02-2013 09:27 PM)TrueSlyr Wrote:  

I feel like its a 50/50 thing here. Some girls agree ot come back to my place, other girls directly say no, but they still makeout, physically escalate with me outside.

So Im wondering, if shes willing to do all of that, why isnt she willing to come back and have sex?

After the first date, which is drinks at the bar.. What I do is.. say, hey come back to my place and we can watch tv or hangout. If they say no, thats when I physically escalate to the making out and kissing on the street, but it never works. Its like once their mind is made up, it cant be changed. So I'm wondering what can I do differently? Or is it just truly a numbers game ?

There is nothing that you can do differently. Some girls will not sleep with you on the first night regardless of what some faggot PUA teachers might tell you. Some girls have rules they set for themselves and will only put on the the 3'rd date, etc. If you believe otherwise then you're lying to yourself.

When she says no and you start making out with her in the street, that's when you're killing all plausible deniability and reinforce the fact that she won't sleep with you that night. Chances are that it comes off as desperate. Just relax and be patient. There's no race going on to see how fast you can bang a girl.

[sexysasquatch]

(12-08-2013 03:33 AM)bodmon Wrote:  

no, not at all. but it is your fault is you don't get a makeout on the first date. though it's small in the scheme of things, i think the ability to consistently get the makeout on the first meeting or date is the basic mark of a guy who's experienced with women vs a guy who lucks into the occasional date. if you manage isolation, gain attraction, and have a killer instinct, then it's yours for the taking.

Not true, I luck into the occasional date (veryyyy occasional) from street approach/night game and I don't think I've had one yet where I don't get the make out (no make outs so far on instadate, but I don't count those, since the girl didn't have to do anything like show up to prove her interest in you). Anything beyond that though is pretty abysmal record .

To the OP though, the problem with not getting the bang on the first date is they typically don't respond after that. It seems like the whole they will forgive you for overstepping and pushing for the close sooner than later is not really true.

[reaper23]

i'm not sure i understand why the need to press for the first date sex?

if it happens it happens if it doesnt it doesnt.

i've regretted having sex on the first date

rarely if ever regretted not.

i like setting the stage for ten fucks out of woman, not just one. taking it relatively slowly (2rd or 3rd at the latest, and only in rare exceptions going beyond that) sets that stage much better than a quick bang.