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My Game is fairly weak; any recommendations apart from Roosh?
06-12-2010, 05:56 PM
Mystery Method is good, I'm half way through it and it's legit, a lot of it is stuff you might have heard/read about from other PUA guides, but I think it's worth checking out. One thing though, maybe it's just the girls in this town, but "negging" hasn't really been working too well for me, even when tactfully and playfully, but it's featured pretty heavy in Mystery's advice.
As far as my advice goes, as someone who is improving and getting better, I can offer a few reflections. I have to give a lot of credit to Roosh, who has got me thinking about things in more of a Zen Buddhist way when it comes to trying to approach and pick up women. I used to have the worst approach anxiety known to man (I've had "social anxiety" since I was a kid), and would take rejections, getting "blown out", etc. really personally. That is probably the worst thing you can do, once you "detach" yourself and basically "stop giving a fuck", it will help your game soo much. Once again, props to Roosh and one of his recent posts about "approaching should be the foundation of your game", I'd agree and as I'm finding out, approaching is what is really going to help grow your game, and yes even those "blow outs", because you will learn from them and also learn not not care.
I've also learned and come to realize that whenever I would do approaches when first getting into the game, I would be so nervous, that it would effect my body language, tone, expression, etc., that I wasn't projecting confidence or an image of a person who is very comfortable. Body language, eye contact and voice projection and tone are so crucial, probably as much or even more then what you're saying (as long as it's not something totally lame/weak). Speak clearly, confidently, putting proper emphasis on certain things if you are trying to be clever/witty, just basically "being articulate".
As someone with approach anxiety, nervousness, and low confidence, I have been kind of learning that sometimes you "need to fake it till you make it", you've probably heard it before, but we all know that women are attracted to confidence/arrogance, so just be that guy, or at least try your best to act like him. When I think of an opener and see a girl or set that I want to approach, I kind of like to think of myself as an actor in a play or improvisational skit, where I have a line to convincingly deliver then, from there use my skill, talent, intellect, personality, etc. to keep the "performance" going.
You kind of need to be a "lyrical wordsmith" or "artist", not in a hip-hop emcee kind of way (LOL), but what you say, the cleverness, the smoothness, delivery, and timing are huge. Recently I have been working on setting a "sexual frame" when it comes to conversation, and escalating the flirting, from indirect opener, introduction, convo development, and into comfort building. By sexual frame, I mean I try to take the nature of the conversation more sexual, but in a smooth, casual ("non-awkard) kind of way, where it all flows. Sometimes I do this from the get go, I can't think of any "examples", but last night I opened a girl at the bar who looked very young, I asked her: "Do you know the bouncers here?" and as she started to open her mouth to reply, I said: "I ask, because you don't look a day over 21", she said: "I'm 21", I said: "I guess I could believe it". She offered to show me her I.D., and I said: "No it's all good, I'm sure that you're over 18 and that's all I really care about." I said this in a very flirtatious way, implying a sexual vibe, and gently, casually touched her lower back when doing so, with a smile on my face.
I can write a bunch more, but I'll start with this, sorry if this is all "stating the obvious" or stuff you already know, anyways hope it helps, good luck, and remember as Roosh says, you got to put in work and look at pick up as a "job" if you want to get good.