Day 1.
Land on a Thursday. Place is freezing can't even fathom living here for more than 2 days. I'm a pussy, I say this outloud as I'm getting on the shitty 45 min bus ride. Not looking good since I caught a nasty nasty cold on the flight over. Didn't eat for the last 16 hours. (Don't take a cab from the airport just a waste of money)
Finally arrive at the apartment and immediately start downing nyquil like water and pass out (wake up 7x due to cold sweats and hot flashes). Wake up at 12am (set an alarm) roam the streets for 15 minutes like a zombie, luckily nothing is going on so I'm thrilled I have 24 hours to recover. Pass out.
Looking Shitty.
Day 2.
Feeling just good enough to run game (up at 10am). To put the nail in the coffin I set an alarm for 7pm to nap until midnight. During the day, IDGAF about the blue lagoon, my only interest is getting rid of this insane flu/cold and trying some seafood. I hit up a place called hortin's (sp) it's 2 blocks up the street from dolly/austur.
Sweet spot (all meals are dough though, 5K krona for a nice meal (soup+seafood+drink).
I walk up to the grocery store (bonus with a pig logo) and grab some beers/red bulls for the inevitable pregame/post game events.
As I'm walking down I start my stop watch on the iPhone and ping the time it takes me to get from B5 to Austur to my place. It is a no brainer logistically Austur would be better, but I'm texting slubu and he is basically saying hotter chicks are at B5, overall he was correct.
7pm pass out 12am wake up. Game time!
Attire: pretty much full suit, just don't have matching pants so you can call it slacks and blazer. I brought all my high end stuff so I know it all fits perfect.
B5: Well if you read bang iceland the description is accurate. First of all, this place from a game perspective is horrifying. Horrible. You're flanked by booths/tables, no vortex spot. Lots of top talent and this is coming from a guy who prefers Latinas to white girls and their skin is flawless. Crazy.
After about 40 minutes and two drinks I realize this place is too immature/shit show level to even operate in. After I leave, the line to get inside is full on crowded concert level rowdy. Dudes are falling over the chains (not even velvet rope so I know that shit hurts), bottles/glasses are rolling all over the street and you got some weird chicks pointing out people to let in yelling and pointing while dudes continue to adjust their bowties and shoulder check each other.
Sprint down to Austur:
First of all if there is a god, I am going to thank him for making this club because it seems to be literally designed for my game style/personality. The following helps you in this club 1) good dance moves, 2) extremely high energy, 3) better dressed than everyone else in the club. These three are pretty much my MO for going to real clubs so it was almost like coming in with pocket aces.
I stood at the very end of the bar near the smoking area every single time I was not in transit. Post there when you're not getting anything and want to sip your drink watching the catastrophe that is Icelandic nightlife.
Anyway, I check my coat tip the lady heavily (200%) so people behind me could tell I was not from there. Mixed reactions. Net net I say positive because the negative reactions came from the fat ones and the extremely well dressed good looking guys who clearly were from the city.
Go downstairs grab a drink and head to the spot I mentioned above. Two sips in it already begins.
A cute faced Icelander asks me what time it is. I recall the secret fattie issue in this country so I assume she is fat but also assume she has friends. Boom her friend is bangable (definitely nothing to brag about). We talk about bs for 20 mins, and the would bang friend asks if I want a drink. I say yes, then she asks for a photo.
As I'm posing for the photo I naturally grab her waist and as her friend is about to snap the photo she grabs my dick. I have no idea wtf made her do this, but it made for a humerous photo and an obvious Dtf signal. I glance at my watch and it's only 2am. (I'll call this girl d-grabber from now on)
I go up stairs to take a piss telling d-grabber I will be back. She gives me a sad face but nods. As I'm walking up the stairs another blonde girl (this place has 100's of them) some chick yells "Califfffooorrrrnnniiiiaaaa!!" I glance over and she waves. I ask her why she is ear hustling on the conversations in a joking tone, and she says "word gets around fast in Iceland!" (Mental note to try to be more discreet with D-grabber).
Go to the bathroom... Wtf is wrong with this place? Chicks are up in the bathroom, no one cares and guys are quite obviously doing major party favors. Not even being discreet about it leaning over on the silver ledging to sniff while taking a piss. I'm no where near drunk enough for that yet.
Shit finally starts to crack at 3am. Before returning to d-grabber I smash a "shot" see 1/2 a sip of vodka and grab a double vodka burn. D-grabber is grinding with some dude, I head to the dance floor and open some chick. Airball. Turn around walk two steps out of site. Open up chick (swing and miss). Start walking to the other side of the dance floor but have my arm yanked by some random blonde.
Her: "Do you drink tonight"
Me: "sure?" (No idea wtf she means I assume she wants to do shots)
Her: "come here first"
She yanks my arm practically out of its socket and I am at the back end of the dance floor, well far out of site.
After 2 mins of dancing her hand is up my shirt and we start making out. Song ends she drags me to bottle service. Fuck me d-grabber is right outside the bottle service booth. I try to be cool with her monsterous party size, her Icelandic male friends look like they want to castrate me, no fixing this situation. Fuck me fuck me decision time, I go with the bottle service chick (bad decision in hindsight since dudes would Cockblock for obvious reasons but she was much much more attractive)
We make out in front of her friends, the bouncer then makes me leave the table. I think I am goosed now. Table girl and d-grabber are likely airballs.
I roll to the smoking area to get a cigarette. I buy one off some icelandic girl, conversation doesn't go anywhere, then ignore them and ask for a light from the girl next to me. Conversation is fine "what's your ethnicity?" She asks and starts blasting me with a series of other random personal questions like an awkward interview.
She likes salsa. Perfect timing since Danza kuduro comes on. I bounce her to the dance floor to run similar American style salsa game. She's icelandic Cuban so I name her "icecube" she laughs and we go dance"icecube dance moves
![[Image: wink.gif]](https://rooshvforum.network/images/smilies/wink.gif)
" he laughs again.
D grabber, table service and 30 other people smashed in the corner see this all go down for about 1-2 mins and it goes 100% well. I stop mid song per usual USA tactics, bad move, her fat fat fat friend (never met her) grabs her to go "find their friends". FML.
I go back to the dance floor d-grabber notices me and leaves her guy to come dance with me, I realize I can smash this girl unfortunately I'm definitely faded at this point and I end it short to get... Another beer. Over here I run into table girl.
Table girl then mouth rapes me oddly enough after the mouth rape she delivers the game over blow "Aww you could take the prettiest girl in this whole club home with you right now!". Any time a girl says this to you, be certain you have
zero shot of fucking her. Either A your game was weak or B she thinks you are dumpster diving. Either way you're fucked. I'm annoyed and then a big ass Icelandic dude shoulder checks me and my beer smashes on the ground.
I leave to find D-grabber chick or Salsa girl
Gone gone gone, open 2-3 more chicks all miss and the lights come on to close and I quickly grab my coat and bounce to run street game. I run laps, Austur to the 7-11 type place to the street food down the hill from B5. After 2 laps I hear "hey again" and it's icecube!
I bullshit about wanting to find food, then say to drink at my place. She agrees but the catch is she is bringing 2 friends. Turns out to be a dude and another bangable chick, I don't care and agree. Better than the fattie who blocked before. I will also have more alcohol available.
Blurry here with just bullshit photos, music, beer. Dude and random chick leave. Game on with this chick. Ends up just me & icecube.
Day 3....