[bonkers]

First let me start out by giving massive props to the text messaging guide in Bang - I was a omega text messager and wrote out essays to girl with little reward. After reading bang and in particular the text messaging guide, I've been very aloof, asked random questions, didn't worry about spelling, punctuation and the girls seem far more responsive.

Background: Blonde HB7. Used to ride the cock carousel like crazy from ages 18-22. Now at 25, claims to be reformed.

We used to do uni together and while there was some sexual tension there, I was too beta to push for anything more than a makeout.

Now, after uni, we went our seperate ways and moved to different parts of the country.

Recently, I took a year off from work to travel the world, improve my style and my game. When she found that out, she re-initiated contact, signing off messages with an x, even tells me that she hadn't had sex in 18 months (doubtful) etc.

Basically, I think she sees me as a potential option as a beta provider for when she decides to settle down - I of course, want to play on this and bang her as much as possible.

I am trying to get her to visit me - I've tried a few times with by writing omega messages, but to no avail - she would say yes but wouldn't go through with it. I grew sick of it, so I eventually decided, screw it, and followed the text messaging guide and this has re-initiaited her interest.

Here is the exchange from when I went aloof:

HB7: I am on a flight booking frenzy - i can either take my flights home on the 20th til 22nd of dec or cash them in for a x2 trips to <where I'll be visiting in a few days> one in early jan and one for march weekend. Will be in Japan for the first couple of weeks of feb. So thinking a <place where I live< trip start of April??? Will you be around?

bonkers: not sure where i'll be in april

HB7: I better get my act together and catch you earlier then!!!

bonkers: yeah let us know when youve sorted something out cheers

HB7: Will do I wish i could be everywhere. :0 It's been forever since i've seen you!!!

<a week later>
HB7: p.s you have been quiet of late. upto mischief?

bonkers: it's not mischief if everyone is having fun right?


HB7: its definitely mischief!!! good for you

bonkers: do you do polefit?

HB7: haha!!! Not for a while, but yes I have done the odd pole class. Pole school goes back on the 7th of Jan why? you ask the oddest questions x

HB7: are you taking up pole dancing? hehe.

what can I do here to try and get her to visit me without sounding too needy?

I was thinking of hitting her up in a week or so, with something like "so booked those flights to <where I live> yet missy" - will that seem too needy?

Also, what's the deal on signing off messages with an x pre-bang? should you do it, if she does it first? or just ignore her x's?

[Cruisen_Chubby]

(12-17-2012 06:36 PM)bonkers Wrote:  

Also, what's the deal on signing off messages with an x pre-bang? should you do it, if she does it first? or just ignore her x's?

A big fuck no to the X's and/or O's. Not only pre-bang; but throughout the life of the dalliance. You are a man. Act (text?) like one.

She's chasin' you buddy, whatever you do, hold the upper hand.

[thegmanifesto]

(12-17-2012 06:36 PM)bonkers Wrote:  

what can I do here to try and get her to visit me without sounding too needy?

I don't know why I read these text message threads, they give me a headache. (Waiting for a biz call, and stuck at my computer).

My advice?

Pick up the horn and call her.

You could end up going round and round on the "text message merry-go-round" till the Apocalypse comes.

[bonkers]

(12-17-2012 09:55 PM)Cruisen_Chubby Wrote:  

A big fuck no to the X's and/or O's. Not only pre-bang; but throughout the life of the dalliance. You are a man. Act (text?) like one.

She's chasin' you buddy, whatever you do, hold the upper hand.

Noted. Thanks bro. Glad to have clarified the x's and o's, always been a bit unsure of that.

(12-17-2012 10:09 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

(12-17-2012 06:36 PM)bonkers Wrote:  

what can I do here to try and get her to visit me without sounding too needy?

I don't know why I read these text message threads, they give me a headache. (Waiting for a biz call, and stuck at my computer).

My advice?

Pick up the horn and call her.

You could end up going round and round on the "text message merry-go-round" till the Apocalypse comes.

G,

honoured to have your response in this thread.

Normally, I wouldn't have a problem getting on the horn and calling her, but I think in this instance, it might be low yield, as it would kill the aloofness.

Basically since reading this forum and going off the advice of cats like you on here, I've spruced things up a bit - got some decent threads, travelling overseas, working out, juicing and even tried the apple cider vinegar (but it was a bit rough on me)

She saw the effects of this first hand, when I met with her earlier this year when I was up in her city for work. Unfortunately a bang was not on the cards because of poor logistics (she works as a nurse, couldn't drink/early finish to the night, early start at work). But I think I was upgraded in her eyes from a beta/omega to a possible semi-alpha because since then she keeps messaging me out of the blue, as if to keep me as an option when she decides to settle down.

With her renewed interest, I became beta again with my replies, hoping that she would be down to meet up.

This didn't work, so I basically said screw it and went the aloof messaging and it seems to have got her (at least partially) on the hook.

Question is, how can I try and get her to come and visit through aloof attitude/texts?

[Cruisen_Chubby]

1) Non-Sequiter text.

2) "Oh, that was supposed to go to someone else; but hey, while I got ya here- whats the deal with those travel plans."

Then get back to us. We will pick it up from there.

[thegmanifesto]

(12-18-2012 02:12 AM)bonkers Wrote:  

Question is, how can I try and get her to come and visit through aloof attitude/texts?

I wouldn't even want a girl to come visit me off text messages.

Too much gets lost in translation.

She might be flying in at 9 o'clock and you go to the airport in the morning only to find out she is getting in at 9pm.

Or she might be meeting you in Milan.

You live in Milan, Italy and the girl may take a flight to Milan, Indiana.

Get her on the horn and get the sh*t straight, get the expectations correct and her juices flowing.

Text sucks for that.

Try it by text if you want, but I warned you.

[bonkers]

any experienced cats online atm? need some urgent help (my commentary in italics):

resuming from OP above. apologies for the poor grammar/spelling/punctuation, but it's all part of the aloofness that I'm trying to portray. In the past I used to type out fucking essays to chicks with minimal success

bonkers: haha nah was gonna recommend you take it up if you didn't polefit girls are crazy flexible



HB7: new career???
haha i don't want to know how you know that 




bonkers: by reading extensive research journal articles on the subject of course how else would i know



HB7:haha I'm happy for you careful though it also makes you pretty strong. One of my goals in life is to spin upside down. haha. How's <place I'm going to>?




bonkers: nah decided to spend a few more days in <where I live> heading down to <place> on thurs



HB7: ooohhh sounds like someone is besotted!!! xx


bonkers: nah had some meetings with businesses interested in sponsoring my website so had to stay back a few days




HB7: well done!!!!!!!!! tell me should I fly back on thurs til sat??? I have to decide tonight x


(she asks me whether she should fly down to the same city I'm going to be in at the same time)



bonkers: yeah you should fri before xmas is the best night of the year in <place I'm going to>

was this too eager because she then flakes



HB7: cancelled my flights for thursday. will be in <place I'm going to> 16th of jan for mona foma then again for march long weekend xxx




bonkers: ok

I figure it's over and she has flaked yet again, but then today, she texts

HB7: see you in <place I'm going to> flying tomorrow wish


How should I respond here?
-really aloof like "sweet"
or slightly more invested like "sweet, you won't regret it "


Some factors:
-this chick is hot. but crazy. has ridden the cock carousel hard from 18-22 and has beta providers coming out of her ears
-I don't know wtf "wish" is in the above message - typo? should I ask?
-this aloof text game is working a treat for me atm, so I want to keep it up but at the same time:
-flights are expensive at the moment, so if she has in fact booked the flights, then this is a bit of an investment on her part as she is only flying down for 3 days / 2 nights. should I reward her in anyway? either in text or in person?

[bojangles]

I'm finding myself just saying cool, ok, no, yes a lot in texts these days. I don't know what the fuck wish means either, so I'm not sure what would be the right message, I myself was thinking 'cool' but that 'wish' is a bit of spanner, fuck it, I'd still say 'cool'

[Cruisen_Chubby]

Flying into a different city to see someone is quite the investment- if she's not yankin your chain: she deserves a bit more interest on your end.

If I was traveling a certain distance to see someone and they weren't crazy about the idea; fuck that- I'd eject.

There are times to be aloof, and there will be many if she comes to said city in question, but in regards to making such a huge investment on her part, I would give in a little so she can make tentative arrangements.

[TheMan]

Just Call her dude

[Christian McQueen]

Call her. I get the text game and use it extensively because that's this generation and it does work, but certain situations require it.

You can tell ALOT about a girl's intentions from the phone call. Perks if you have a good phone voice.

[bonkers]

If anyone cares...

got her to visit me through aloof texts

had a few drinks and had a good time

she came back to my place

and then she goes "I don't do that anymore" "I have to get to know you better"
(this is a chick that used to ride the cock carousel like there was no tomorrow)

I tried to play it cool, freeze her out a bit and pull the "I'm not desperate for sex card" to no avail.

grr.

TLDR: a chick, who has ridden the cock carousel, flies in from interstate, goes home with me and then pulls the "I don't do that anymore" shit and I can't overcome it

fuckidy fuck fuck fuck fuck

[poutsara]

(12-31-2012 08:36 PM)bonkers Wrote:  

had a few drinks and had a good time

she came back to my place

and then she goes "I don't do that anymore" "I have to get to know you better"
(this is a chick that used to ride the cock carousel like there was no tomorrow)

Let's translate her statement: "I won't do that with you."

Not trying to be mean here. Most girls are whores, they might just not be your whore. She is the same person now as when she let herself get handled casually by all those guys in the past. And we should absolutely judge girls based on their past, what else is there to go on. If by some miracle she actually never acted like a slut, then by all means pursue.

Based on her history rest assured that if some guy got her excited enough tomorrow night and she knew she could take it without anyone in her circle finding out, she would, and she would lie about it if she had to. Keep gaming her, if you think it's worth it.

[thegmanifesto]

(12-31-2012 08:36 PM)bonkers Wrote:  

If anyone cares...

got her to visit me through aloof texts

had a few drinks and had a good time

she came back to my place

and then she goes "I don't do that anymore" "I have to get to know you better"
(this is a chick that used to ride the cock carousel like there was no tomorrow)

I tried to play it cool, freeze her out a bit and pull the "I'm not desperate for sex card" to no avail.

grr.

TLDR: a chick, who has ridden the cock carousel, flies in from interstate, goes home with me and then pulls the "I don't do that anymore" shit and I can't overcome it

fuckidy fuck fuck fuck fuck

And....

Like I said.

You should have called.

Hopefully it's a lesson learned.

[Samseau]

At the very least calling would have clued you in to her interest for you, she didn't seem to be too hot for you in the first place.

Quote:

and then she goes "I don't do that anymore" "I have to get to know you better"

"I don't do that anymore." You say "Do what?" "I'm not doing anything... get your head out of the gutter." As you slide your hands over her ears and go for a kiss.

"I have to get to know you better" You say "I agree we should get to know each other better." And then you take off her shirt. She'll protest again, "That's not what I mean!" You say "And what do you think I mean?"

Then she says "I'm not having sex tonight." You say "Of course we're not having sex tonight." And you keep her held against you. She'll retort, "Then why do you keep trying to have sex with me?" You say, "I'm not trying to have sex with you... I'm just getting to know you better."

Etc. keep escalating + parrying her responses by agreeing and escalating.

[bonkers]

Thanks G and Samseau. Will have to keep it in mind for next time. Especially, the attitude and vibe of those responses (Samseau) and the whole thing about picking up the horn and calling her (G).

I feel pretty shit about the whole thing, but all I can do is learn from it and keep rolling I guess.

[bonkers]

(12-31-2012 08:55 PM)poutsara Wrote:  

(12-31-2012 08:36 PM)bonkers Wrote:  

had a few drinks and had a good time

she came back to my place

and then she goes "I don't do that anymore" "I have to get to know you better"
(this is a chick that used to ride the cock carousel like there was no tomorrow)

Let's translate her statement: "I won't do that with you."

Not trying to be mean here. Most girls are whores, they might just not be your whore. She is the same person now as when she let herself get handled casually by all those guys in the past. And we should absolutely judge girls based on their past, what else is there to go on. If by some miracle she actually never acted like a slut, then by all means pursue.

Based on her history rest assured that if some guy got her excited enough tomorrow night and she knew she could take it without anyone in her circle finding out, she would, and she would lie about it if she had to. Keep gaming her, if you think it's worth it.

Totally missed this post - thanks poutsara. What you say makes sense, and I think if I'd had had tighter game, she would have put out.

What happened that night was that I had a few people to catch up with and I kept her waiting.

Then when I caught up with her, I felt bad (I shouldn't have) that I had kept her waiting and the fact that she had invested into flying down, so I kinda went pretty beta (grrr). I agreed with her views on things waaay too much.

We still had good time and she did come home with me, but obviously I didn't give her the tingles to get the bang.

She's sent me a couple of enthusiastic messages since then, and I've responded to them in a fairly aloof manner. (I'm not really sure how to play it from here - it might be stretch to ask her to fly down again so soon - might have to go aloof for a few months and re-initiate and try and get her to come down).

[XXL]

(12-31-2012 08:36 PM)bonkers Wrote:  

got her to visit me through aloof texts

had a few drinks and had a good time

she came back to my place

and then she goes "I don't do that anymore" "I have to get to know you better"
(this is a chick that used to ride the cock carousel like there was no tomorrow)

I tried to play it cool, freeze her out a bit and pull the "I'm not desperate for sex card" to no avail.

It's because of that aloofness. I see guys are obsessed with appearing aloof and mysterious and like this fantasy. The problem is that unless you're known/public person it doesn't work. The girl needs to experience who you are and see your personality. That's her getting to know you. She sees what you're about and what to expect from you. This is comfort.

Beside that, if you know that she would have a fucking blast with a guy like you like never before then you shouldn't feel that internal resistance and act all suave and blase and uptight. So if you are cool guy then definitely you should actively push it to elicit her adventurous self to the surface, make her laugh like crazy, say these funny off the wall things, grab her hand as you walk out of somewhere, flirt with her intensively, make her have an awesome time etc and in that case the sex is natural consequence like it's just another thing to do and then it just happens cause the girl anticipates it and is ready when you pull the trigger.

You engage her > she experiences you > she gets to know you > you have sex.

It's very different than chill weak sauce game where you sit there with your arms crossed button pushing her to make her game you and trying to trick her into your bed with you with some magical move.

That's my personal take

[Hotwheels]

Aloof works just fine. The problem is, just like everything else guys read about online, they take it too far.

Aloof doesn't mean to never open up at all. Measured doses work best as it gets her hamster spinning as she isn't sure of your intentions or thoughts.

Just like the never buy drinks or meals shit, guys take it as gospel and overdo it slamming their dicks in the door in the process.