Danger notch
01-29-2018, 04:04 AM
Wow this thread is old. Funny story from last night that fits with the theme of this thread, this thick, slutty Taiwanese girl I smashed last month was back in Shanghai for a night, so I went to see her at her hotel.
My place wasn’t an option, as I had two friends from out of town staying there, and it was already 8pm on a Sunday night. Her hotel was a cheap, shitty one right above a metro stop 40 minutes outside of the city. Met her outside the hotel, we go up, and the fucker at the front desk immediately asks for my passport, which I don’t have (I had a copy of it), even though I told them I was only going to be there for about an hour. They told me the cops came through every now and then inspecting peoples’ IDs, because apparently people had been caught engaging in human trafficking at that hotel before, so they had to have my physical ID. Shit.
We had no idea what to do. I didn’t want to take my chances banging outside, seeing as its very illegal here in China, and she probably would’ve been too shy to try that. I’m not sure if Shanghai has love motels, so we went back downstairs, and chilled outside for a few minutes. Suddenly I had an idea. There was another dingy, shitty, dimly-lit hotel in the same building as the one this girl was staying at, so I thought maybe she could book a room there, and check out from this second room the next day after leaving her actual hotel. We walked in, and this guy who had already paid for his room for the night was trying to check out and get a refund. He saw us, and gave us the room key for 100 RMB ($16) instead, so we didn’t even check in, we just took this guy’s room. We go up to the room, and there’s like 30 used cigarettes and cigarette ash lying on the floor, and beer bottles and decks of playing cards scattered around the room, and the place reeks. Fuck it, we say, at least we have a room.
This girl knows the deal, and we immediately get down to business. We get undressed, but right before I slip it in, this cleaning lady knocks on our door, and I angrily tell her to get lost. I guess the dude whose room we snagged was trying to be a gentleman and get our room cleaned. Cleaning lady leaves, and I can finally smash this chick in peace, or so I thought. We start going at it, but about a minute after we start we hear another knock on the door, and this time it’s trouble. The hotel security are at the door, and we’re in trouble because we never checked in/produced ID. They threaten to call the police, but my girl goes to the door and persuades them to let us wait for a bit before we go down to register our IDs (which was obviously bullshit because I didn’t have my passport). They leave with her ID, so I think I can finally rest easy and finish the bang, and then we’ll just check out and pick up her ID when we’re done. Wrong.
10 minutes later, mid-bang, an ACTUAL POLICE OFFICER shows up, and I’m nervous at this point. I have to keep putting my clothes on and talking to these cock-blockers, but finally this guy is a bit nicer, and even though he’s an actual policeman, all he came to do was remind me to check in with my ID later (fat chance), and he returns the girl’s ID. We finish banging, leave the room card on the hotel’s front desk when the staff aren’t looking, and book it out of there.
I’ve never had a lay in potentially dangerous circumstances like that before, but it was definitely a funny story to tell, trying to finish a bang while being constantly interrupted, and with a few cops outside possibly waiting to bust me for not having my passport. In the end there was no trouble, but combine this potential danger with the shittyness of the hotel, and how ratchet the chick I banged was, and at my young age that was definitely the most adventurous lay I’ve ever had.
天不怕,地不怕,就怕外国人说中国话!