[XXL]

yeah it IS about being normal. i dare you to be normal when you look into a hottie's amazing eyes or touch her perfect hips and actually stay normal like you are with your best friend.

the title is as accurate it can be and the word "my" in it is not accidental. i'm not trying to convince anybody to agree with me. some do, some don't it's all good.

i never meant to it to be innovative. i simply illustrated one thing that was way more effective FOR ME than "attraction land" of game game game, aka being loud, throwing big gestures, dancing with all the girls, making out left and right, saying hillarious/impressive/bold things, ie: being another full cheesy player she can be entertain with and give fake number to. i really thought that the hotties needed to see my super duper awesome game as a sign of my status. FAIL. i was my own worst enemy.

then I've found that being a guy comfortable being who he is around hot princess is what makes me awesome. no pickup aura. no trying to be cool. the must have frame to set: "we're equals/same league" therefore so need for conveying value. example: if you tell something like "jeeez you look like twin sister of anna, for one moment i really thought you were her, since you're not we should meet, hi, what is YOUR name?", can you see what it subcommunicates?

now my interactions are more chill. no playerish vibe. nothing 'gamey' apart from typical socializing with people around, handshakes, just chilling, not trying any shit, meanwhile spotting the hotties and approaching them casualy, not making them laugh too much, no overescalating, no attracting too hard.

being normal while approaching hottest ass around is DHV, caring less than her whether it goes anywhere is DHV, being in control is DHV, enduring her scepticism is big DHV (usually the less gamey you come across the less tests they give). so instead of attracting more, i go straight to getting to know each other (with flirtations in between of course), we hold the tension with eyes, it goes smoothly, we ask eachother deep, personal questions, we open up, she shows me the REAL girl inside of her, she gets interested, then excited and with time eventually turned on usually in privacy, not in public place.

from the side it looks smooth but rather boring to watch. totally invisible game. two people standing next to each other, running their mouths, smiling, sitting together, looking into each other eyes, bit of seductive and classy physicality, holding hands, maybe some dancing, maybe making a toast, talking to her group. basically quite innocent scene.

[Greek kamaki]

Being normal vs the deviation.Girls want normal guys.On the other hand average Jo is boring.So they want abnormal the guy who is in deviation.But strong force creates counterbalance so nature tends to exercise a huge pressure when you try to deviate from normality.The counterbalance force can be so big that it can get you even deeper to former mediocrity.

All this struggle gets evident by the girls.So dare to be boring.Girls like when a guy dares to be boring as hell.Then deviate.Put in sparkles to the conversation to suck her up in another dimension.When she starts feeling comfortable in the new dimension she gets addicted and wants to escape.It is the Balkan power environment of safe hands.If she gets used to mediocrity all other guys can seem like equivalent options.So I get them used to high game get them spoiled completely.In any cases many of her friends or the other guys will open her again the door to normality.They will give advice etc.So what matters is how strong is the frame if you can impose the frame of your power and madness to the rest of frames.

This is the differece between the Greek and polish generally slavic girls.Slavic girls allow you to take them to heights while Greek girls always put an obstacle they say now you surpass the limits.They want to keep in contact to earth that is why their asses always point low.Direction of asses shows the girls ambitions.

[Forza]

Im half half on this I think. This is basically date game right, where you have some space and time to have a proper conversation and genuinely get into each other? Ive always been much better 1-1 when there arent any distractions, and and its sweet when you get that feeling that shes having an awesome time listening to you.

For me dates are the time when you can really relax, be yourself (which is cheesy but it is nice to not have bother with thinking through what part of the 'method' you should be getting to next) and build genuine attraction thats based on you rather than something you read on the internet. But there are so many different situations full of hot girls, where the atmosphere is hyped, and getting her alone and talking about your childhood is going to bore the fuck out of her. I mean its good to have the ability to be the big man and show everyone else how much fun they could be having if they were a part of your circle.

Where do you meet your girls? Are you mainly a day game guy and convert into dates?

[XXL]

(07-09-2012 04:00 AM)Greek kamaki Wrote:  

...

with all due respect sir, what you wrote is not relevant to the context of this thread. it's about how emotional connection (rapport = trust + comfort) with hot girls leads to intimacy pretty fast. that applies to all women, no matter the nationality, origin or background.

(07-09-2012 07:05 AM)Forza Wrote:  

Im half half on this I think. This is basically date game right, where you have some space and time to have a proper conversation and genuinely get into each other? Ive always been much better 1-1 when there arent any distractions, and and its sweet when you get that feeling that shes having an awesome time listening to you.

yes, dates are great for that.

(07-09-2012 07:05 AM)Forza Wrote:  

But there are so many different situations full of hot girls, where the atmosphere is hyped, and getting her alone and talking about your childhood is going to bore the fuck out of her. I mean its good to have the ability to be the big man and show everyone else how much fun they could be having if they were a part of your circle.

Where do you meet your girls? Are you mainly a day game guy and convert into dates?

nightclubs
it's fun fun fun however i always want to stop, calm her down and be real for few minutes. so in the middle of the chaos all it takes it to shout "ey!! ok ok i know its cool, be real now, enough of this shit, let's sit there, where are you from? let's talk, i like you, who are you?" and we just talk about personal things, not exactly super deep shit, just basic personal stuff, in order to find something to connect me with her. then we back to fun. then we back to talking again. back and forth. i become someone familiar now, someone meaningful who she talked about her little sister to, her friends like me, i'm officially the shit in ther eyes at this point. flaking is super low thanks to that.

daytime
i don't lead pua lifestyle, i don't leave house to pick up chicks so i meet them as i go about my business day by day. usually i talk when i bump into a girl on my way, bus stop, bank, school, shop, street, bar, mall, etc. interaction is very casual, no fireworks, i focus on making her comfortable and opening her up the idea of meeting me later while screening at the same time. we talk, i make it arousing (my convo is like: http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-14202-...id233832), if we click we connect, if not "have a awesome day/let's be friends".

my latest favourite is meeting girls riding a bike. i meet a girl like that, instant date almost guaranteed cause i'm normal guy, i know the place, we talk a bit then instant adventurous date. also it's easy to meet a girl who's not on bike, pedestrians etc. beside i noticed i get a lot of attention probably because of my my usual sport uniform (super bright cytrus shirt and bandana on head).



PS. i don't get it, i write about obvious things. is it that hard to understand that nothing else really hooks a hot girl if you're not known/successful/famous? there is always a guy with more money, with more status, with better car, with cooler apartment, with access to events etc. nothing you can do is impressive. the only thing that is special about you is your personality and emotional influence on the girl.

and girls flaked like fucking crazy when i didn't connect cause competition in "attraction land" is the most fierce, girls are attracted to plenty of guys which rarely converts to someting more than giggling.

[Greek kamaki]

I think being normal does not work with girls.If it did then all guys would be surrounded by hot girls.The guys who I see with hot girls do not seem very normal to me,nor do the PUAs etc.

[XXL]

thing is, "normal" to me is probably something different than what it is to someone else. i assume that most guys see this issue similar as "be yourself" thing and completly misundestand it.

see, guys hear me say this and they think that being normal means to be the same weak willed individual that they're now, and that they can relate to girls like 'treat her like a friend and see what happens' and the hot girl will like them for them. that's their definition of being normal. so they start weak and they decide to become even more weak to make a chick love them. yeah..

instead of realizing that you have to be in control like a motherfucker and own this shit with full on boss/gangster attitude in first place so that a hot chick can respect you first, and only then you can open up emotionally and show you're normal guy with feelings, doubts and insecurities like every human being and connect with her like that. in that case that hot chick will be very excited cause speaking metaphorically she got this WARIOR in her arms she can heal and nurture.

so all things like feeling relaxed and entitled, being in control, dealing with scepticism, leading, dealing with friends, being patient and empathethic, making her comfortable, understanding timeframes, all of this is required before having good rapport with a hot girl cause at first she must WANT to open up to you before giving you a chance.

so of course that being "normal" like my neighboor who interact with maybe 5 new chicks a year will not get any kind of results.

i know hot intimidating chicks in different city who feel connection with me asking me when i will come over even tough we keep in touch only via facebook/mail/txt. not because i'm rich or famous. but because when they met me they felt they "won" a champ and when we communicated emotionally later they developed connection with me based on personal stuff cause it showed that i was normal human being (not some kind of cartoonish impeccable alpha to the max).

common thing i hear is that i'm so normal and chill not like these other clowns blabalbabla..

so game first, ask question last.



LET ME CLARIFY THE LAST TIME
this is not about being a hopelessly romantic guy in da club. connection will happen cause as you hold your frame like nobody else she will eventually ger sucked into it.

the advantage of connecting is that it is effective and brings result (if you want to look at it that way). when i gamed girls to the max out of the stratosphere with my witty come backs and dominant escalation, these interactions weren't productive. i believe it was because of obvious player aura and nothing else. every interaction became one sided like 'another player with bunch of cool tricks to make me put out'. girls liked cause it was entertaining but that's all. but in the end my need for getting them gamed to the max and inability to chill out and just talk was probably big sign of hiding myself behind my game.

semi attractive girls dig it cause they think you're awesome, they get clingy and things happen.

but hotties.. they surrounded with cold/aloof motherfuckers, they respond to that status confidence, not dancing monkey confidence. they see entertaining guys as clowns who put on a show to overcompensate lack of integrity with jokes and laughter. there's no shtick to put out there to convince them you're tha boss. any kind of bullshit will be exposed. i'm not rich or famous, it's fake of me to be dressed in pimped out clothes acting bossy like i run the whole town.

the only thing i can do is to be who i am and stand by it 100%. be humble, centered, comfortable in my own skin and unapologetic. and when i'm genuinely interested in a hot girl without putting on a show they are receptive. cause it's real honest and assertive. less is more, always.

if she happens to be more fake ass diva, she likes me for my balls and that i can simply talk to her like to a human being. scepticism is there but not that confrontational one. we don't start "who's cooler" contest so she doesn't put that front she knows that deep down she's just a girl. and i communicate with that "girl" inside her. and that's how connection is build. that's how she invests in interaction now and later.

[PrettyBoy]

I used to somewhat take this route in highschool. It worked to some extent. I bored a lot of chicks with the "rambling". Scared them off. Too much running off at the mouth, bad choice of topics, fear to escalate etc. I'll probablly give this another whirl on a date with a 6/7 Just for shits and giggles. If it doesn't work for me now that i'm experienced then it probablly never will. Everyone has their niche.

[XXL]

sure, girls get bored because:
- guy does it before she's interested in him
- the guy does it in proper moment but has underdeveloped social intuition and lacks coversational skills, doesn't feel when to listen/speak, how to lead convo, what NOT to say, what's right/wrong, aka he fucks it up.

IMO with a 6/7 girl it's obsolete. game her as usual and she will like you regardless.

i fully agree with saying the game is played in comfort. to me that stage determines everything. attraction stage for a girl is similar thing to what the physical attractiveness of a girl is for a guy. it's like the door, the first filter/requirement to even be interested and open to something later. guys are open to attractive girls only because they're hot - that's our entry level requirement. girls are open to guys only because they pass the attraction stage/innitial scepticism - that's their entry level requirement. attraction is just a passport to cross the border and be greeted in her world. the most crucial 'work' is done there.

[Architekt]

Seems a lot like the sort of stuff Mark Manson advocates in his book, Models.

Quote:

in that case that hot chick will be very excited cause speaking metaphorically she got this WARIOR in her arms she can heal and nurture.

I like this. The girl feels like she's got both the manly protector, and a vessel for her nurturing instincts. This is the sort of game I'm hoping to run when I start at my new uni with the nursing girls there. Gotta keep a tight watch out for clinginess, though.

[muc]

Good thread, thank you for writing this down.

I fall into the category of people who think that reading too much about game destroyed the charm and attractiveness that they had. And it is probably true. I was doing really well with the ladies and they were always above average hot including at least two that were way up there. That was my 20s. I was studying computer science. Most of my friends were forever single.

Late 20s I´ve discovered Mystery, DeAngelo etc. and joined a community of PUAs which quickly made me a guy they followed. I broke up with current girlfriend shortly after and enjoyed some good success, mostly from going out more. But then probably for several reasons I have become very bad with women and my successes disappeared. And I countered that by reading and applying more of the stuff I've read. Which didn't help at all.

Now I'm back to my old self. I travel a lot. I work out a lot. I enjoy reading the forum, heartiste and roosh, but now more for entertainment value and sometimes for some interesting facts or stories.

I still think DeAngelo, Mystery and others have valid points, entertainment value and some good philosophy. But there is also so much trash out there is not even funny. But then again, it probably is the right material for some people, just not for me.

Anyway, in short: Good post, fully agree, do approach if you like her, come in strong, then comfort, a good lifestyle, positive attitude etc. etc. And everything is fine.

[PrettyBoy]

What is there that is not to like? And what is there that is bullshit? Simply put, he found what works for him, and is sharing how he does it. Its definitely not the norm in the gaming community. And if you were a beginner I could see this not working. But with a strong foundation of inner game and experience I am quite sure this approach could prove efficient. There are different ways to get shit done and everyone has something that works better for them than others, So atleast give the benefit of the doubt.

[Thatdude]

Ok well my main thing is how do you manage to do this shit without coming off as the needy beta guy...I guess maybe its all about balance. I noticed that last night... I was talking to this chick and being aloof she actually said "god your just too mysterious for me" and walked away. I also realized that I'm having trouble building a connection..maybe this will help? My conversations fall into the same pattern and start to get "boring"..shit if I'm bored I can't imagine how bored the chick must be.

[Avarence]

(07-03-2012 08:20 AM)XXL Wrote:  

nobody there would be able to tell that we're about to fuck if he looked at us.

Reminds me of days in the high school cafeteria with my secret slam piece. There's just something sinister about visibly casual interaction in public with a girl whose brains you've been fucking out, or are about to. I've realized my confidence peaks at these very moments.

[Basil Ransom]

Disagree. Most of my early, pre-sex conversation focuses on the girl. She talks about herself, I make fun of her. This also makes me seem 'mysterious' because I don't share much info about myself. If I start to talk about myself, or address more weighty topics, she starts to get bored.

Post-sex (i.e. Post first date), you have more leeway, and can act normal. Same for daygame - I think my daygame is still too forward.

[Giovonny]

(10-15-2012 01:54 PM)basilransom Wrote:  

Disagree. Most of my early, pre-sex conversation focuses on the girl. She talks about herself

I don't think you are actually in disagreement. What the op was talking about was authentic speaking. What you are talking is authentic listening. This is just the other side of the same coin.

Authentic listening is something we don't talk about enough! How to listen better in order to get sex!

(10-15-2012 01:54 PM)basilransom Wrote:  

I think my daygame is still too forward.

In that case, go indirect. Follow the "Day Bang" format - elderly type opener, ramble, galnuc

Its just a friendly casual conversation with a woman, during the day.

[XXL]

haha basil you have nothing to disagree actually. i've never meant talking endlessly, i meant deep conversations with some tongue in cheek flavour. it's a mix. i talk deep shit and flirt/tease.

as for being mysterious.. i talk about stuff like childhood memories and fear of loss with girls yet none of them know my street/address or facebook (i never tell). they just know my feelings, not facts.