[HiFlo]

I hit the clubs last night. Approach 2 & 3 sets. Flirt with target. Attempt to isolate my target by asking her to dance. 4 times in a row I get, "I don't dance...."

Funny thing is one of the girls who said "I don't dance" I had been flirting with for 20 minutes and had made out with her for 5 minutes...the attraction was definitely there. Then 30 minutes later I see her grinding up on some slobby looking dude on the dance floor.

What's the deal? Is there an alternative to isolating a girl by bringing her to the dance floor (similarly, when I go "come with me to the bar while I grab a drink she's always like 'no' even after I had already made out with her and there was definite attraction)? What's up with this "I don't dance" line bullshit?

[Aliblahba]

You: Hey, you wanna dance?
Her: I don't dance.
You: (looking confused) No no no. I said you look fat in those pants!

[HiFlo]

Yeah man that's a cool neg-like comeback, but it doesn't really accomplish my goal of shooting for a dance floor grind/hump/makeout and isolation from her friends.

[WestCoast]

You're not letting her know you're willing to walk away. You have to leave first get a drink mid convo, do some shit that makes her know "I am not the center of his attenton".

Also try to avoid asking to dance, just take her hand.

[Kish]

Bandz A Make Her Dance

[azulsombra]

The only time i ask girls to dance is at salsa type venues and even then its more like "lets dance", not "do you want to dance?" What kind of venues are u going to? What are other guys doing? You might need to dial up your confidence before you approach. Dance a bit by yourself and let the girls see your having a good time with or without them.

[HiFlo]

Well yeah, I always do "Let's dance" (not "do you wanna dance?") and I try to take her hand and gently lead her away too. Still no go.

[WestCoast]

Azul is correct. You can only ask to dance or say let's dance at a real event.

In others you dance by yourself, having a great time beer in hand because you don't give a fck about who is trying to judge you. You are having a blast by yourself! Everyone else is just around you.

When you're the life of the dance party everyone gravitates to you.

If you ask to dance in a convo, you're mixing bar game with dance game. That's a dangerous place to be in. Need to be consistent.

[Aliblahba]

Dancing is beta.

[HiFlo]

(09-28-2012 11:55 AM)WestCoast Wrote:  

If you ask to dance in a convo, you're mixing bar game with dance game. That's a dangerous place to be in. Need to be consistent.

I disagree man, around 1:15PM and later I always see a lot of hardcore makeouts on the dance floor, usually social circle but some cold approaches too. All the clubs in my area are half-dance/half-bar and they're liquid, meaning crowds are always flowing from the dance part to the bar part, and if you can't roll with that you're gonna be shut out of a lot of good lays.

In regards to the type of clubs I'm going to, well, the only one's in my town. They play shitty hiphop but every girl (and every guy except for me) knows every word to every one of these shitty songs and is more than happy to lipsync the flow. Hahahahaah, gotta love the south man.

Anyway, i'm using the "let's dance line" as a means to isolate the girl from the group. Neither the "let's go dance" line is working, nor the "let's go the bar" line. As I mentioned in OP, I even made out with the girl on-and-off for 5 minutes and the lines still didn't work to isolate her. I ended up just picking her whole body up and moving her five feet away, and she swayed to the music a little, but then scampered back about 3 minutes later to rejoin her friends. I think, however, that picking her up and walking 20 ft away with her legs wrapped around my torso to plop her down on the dance floor might be a little odd though.

[MidniteSpecial]

Stop asking girls to dance. Dont ask shit. Do shit. GrAb her and start dancing if you really want to dance.

[HiFlo]

(09-28-2012 12:23 PM)MidniteSpecial Wrote:  

Stop asking girls to dance. Dont ask shit. Do shit. GrAb her and start dancing if you really want to dance.

Tried that a couple times. Target was sitting down. Had been flirting for 10-15 minutes with her. Wanted to isolate her from her friends. Took her hand, was just kinda playing with her hand for 30 seconds or so then started tugging toward the dance floor. One gave me a quizzical look as if 'what are you doing' I said, "come on, let's dance, lets go." The other took the hint and just flat-out said, "I don't dance" (bullshit!)

Like I said, the attraction was there, was doing all that kino stuff, but something's fuckin off and it's driving me nuts.

That being said, you're right - the one time last night where I got the girl dancing with me (after she refused me going "let's go dance" three times - the one I had been making out with), was when I just picked her fucking up off her chair (I had spread her legs and was talking to her between her legs) and carried her, plopped her down and started swaying, then picked her up, carried her a few feet further away. (Got this from Julien/Tyler RSD Hotseat vid previous on youtube). I dunno man. Is there no smoother way than just fucking picking her up and carrying her? It brings a lot of attention from every other guy and girl in the place, which I don't always want.

[Cruisen_Chubby]

Possibly stop referring to them as targets. I've never heard of a target that danced.

but girls...they enjoy dancing.

Know that they are another human being and try again.

[WestCoast]

I'm sticking to my same point. You're not building up enough attraction, you have to be willing to leave her. In addition making out in front of her friends is a huge no unless you're handsome. I'd game more, leave talk to other girls, be the party. Then she's just having fun with the life of the party when you pull her to dance. She won't feel like "she is being gamed to dance and her friends won't judge her"

Kissing a girl doesn't mean much, that's the same as holdin her hand nowadays, the attraction is there when her eyes dilate immensely wen you return to see her. When she tries to grind up on you. When she wants your attention. If you leave and she doesn't care she's glad you left.

Making more sense? I am off to a flight soon, I can come back and elongate if needed

[RandalGraves]

1. Like other said, you shouldn't be asking, you should be going up and doing. Samseau has a great post about dance game.

2. Get to know the music in the venues you're dancing at. Even if it sucks, you have to make do. I hate when my local dance bars play generic, crappy hip hop too--luckily that's only a small fraction of the time, though. Otherwise I try to keep up with the top 40 songs my local dance floors blast.

3. Start to develop a "switch" in your mind where you can self-generate enthusiasm. In other words, practice pumping yourself up on command. When I'm out dancing solo, before/in between approaches, I have to get myself into it first, so that a girl will be able to vibe with me when I approach and pull her into my orbit to start dancing. You have to be able to pretend that the music on at the moment is actually your favorite fucking song and now you want to start grooving.

[Samseau]

(09-28-2012 11:57 AM)Aliblahba Wrote:  

Dancing is beta.

Depends... if you're a sick nasty dancer no one will think you're beta.

[HiFlo]

Every club plays Top 40 in my city. No 'real' dance clubs.