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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
08-22-2012, 10:23 AM
This is the mindset every player should adopt in 2012. When you get a number expect her to flake. This will free you from emotional investment or attachment to outcome.
I used to feel elated when I'd get a number. I wouldn't approach any more girls that day because I wanted to coast off that high. It was a huge ego boost.
But then some girls wouldn't text me back. Other girls would text me back but come up with excuses when I'd ask them out.
At first I was frustrated by all the flakes. She gave me her number. She seemed so into me at the time. Why won't she text me back? This took a huge emotional toll on me. It shattered my ego. It made me pissed off at the flakiness of girls in general.
But experience is the biggest teacher. And with a systematic mindset to game you'll notice patterns in behavior.
Now I know not to expect anything. If I get a girl's number, I don't feel anything. I will keep approaching to collect more numbers. If she doesn't text me back I don't care because I have 4 other girls I closed that same day, and I'll close more girls tomorrow. And when a girl texts me back I know there's some interest and the game is on.
I truly don't care if it doesn't pan out. Because when a girl flakes after giving me her number, it's not usually because of me. It's mostly due to unique circumstances in her life that are entirely outside my control. This is why I keep approaching until I strike upon the right girl at the right time. And then I approach some more to find more such girls.
How has this new mindset helped me?
- It's forced me to approach more girls as I know not to become overly invested in any one girl.
- It's forced me to adopt an abundance mentality.
- It's forced me to become detached from outcome.
- It's forced me to morph into a stone-cold emotionless ruthlessly efficient day game player.
How have I adjusted my game?
I set myself up in a high-traffic zone like a college campus. I will dedicate 1 hour to day game. I spend no more than 10 minutes on any one girl. In that span 1 hour span:
- I will approach 10 girls.
- 4 will give me their numbers.
- 2 won't text me back.
- 1 will text me back but will flake.
- 1 will text me back and show up on a date.
1 guaranteed date. Not bad for 1 hour of work.
The reason most guys drop out of the game is because the emotional toll is too damaging. Their egos are too fragile to handle what they perceive as rejection.
The key is to any player is:
(1) work on fundamentals (body language, tonality, grooming)
(2) be emotionally detached
(3) approach, approach, approach
That's all there is to it.
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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
08-22-2012, 01:16 PM
one of these fundamentales can be key to change most of your game: in my case things as easy as smile/joke less (not all the time), changing some clothes, putting on a nicer pair of shoes (no crappy cheap stuff anymore), and taking care of my skin almost doubled my success.
"Fart, and if you must, fart often. But always fart without apology. Fart for freedom, fart for liberty, and fart proudly" (Ben Franklin)
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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
08-22-2012, 02:00 PM
Every time one of these threads come up gman comes up in my mind with his thoughts on calling.
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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
08-22-2012, 02:40 PM
I agree with everything you said. I'd like to add these thoughts...
Try to get more out of each approach. Go for an insta-date, go for a makeout, more touching, more sexual innuendo, be more direct.more ballsy, more bold. The more of a connection you can make in that first interaction, the less likely she will flake.
Have you gotten any makeouts from daygame? Push hard for that. It's higher risk but higher reward.
Sometimes you meet a girl and the chemistry is there, you both can feel it, really lock into those girls and try to insta-date her. These are the ones you could be banging in 72 hours.
Its not quantity of approaches, its QUALITY of approaches. Sometimes we are so eager to learn and get in our first 1000 approaches that we go to fast, we don't push as hard as we could with each girl. Touch her, tease her, grab her hand, go get coffee, look her in the eyes, see how far you can go, see how much you can get away with. Intensify your approaches!
Another issue is target selection. If you are getting numbers from 18 year olds but none of them are calling you back, well, you might start tageting a slightly older group. You might have more success with the 25+ crowd. Try a different demographic.
My main point is this - Don't go out to get numbers, go out to make connections!
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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
08-22-2012, 03:02 PM
One thing that made me increase the number of my bangs was to be more persuasive with the girls i already have. A good friend taught me this.
We used to go hunt for pussy nearly everyday and at the time i believed that the more numbers i get, the more i was likely to bang. I would call a chick, talk to her for 3 or 5 mins, try to arrange a date, if she was not interested, i would just move on and go chase more numbers. This friend told me to focus more on the girls i already have and close those ones before i movo onto other chicks. So i started building deeper connections with the girls i already had, started talking more often to them on the phone and for longer periods and building more comfort between us. This way, i would end up closing girls that were already on my list even girls that flaked me innumerous times.
I just love when i fuck a girl that flaked on me so many times, i call her all disrecpectful names while im fucking her, spit on her and all kinda of crazy shit.
Also, i try to avoid to think that she is going to flake after the first call. I believe a lot in "energies", if you have a negative approach about something then its highly likely that the result wont be great, i am usually very optismitic about things and i highly avoid getting emotional about being rejected. If the bitch doesnt want to fuck, she has bad taste, period, and i just move on.
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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
09-13-2012, 02:59 PM
Did some day game this week at the local campus. All are 5-10 min approaches.
Monday
Approaches: 20
Numbers: 7
Texted back: 4
Dates (scheduled tentatively): 1
Wednesday
Approaches: 12
Numbers: 4
Texted back: 3
Dates (scheduled tentatively): 1
Keep in mind these are all young (18-22) local white American college girls - the hardest of all girls in the world to game. If I went exclusively for foreign/tourist girls like Krauser I think I'd be converting more approaches to numbers to dates. But I live in a college town so these girls are scarce. I'm day gaming young girls who have huge social circles and a uniquely American "anti-creeper stranger danger random" mindset, so these numbers are about what an intermediate player should expect.
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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
09-14-2012, 02:24 PM
Quote: (08-22-2012 02:40 PM)Giovonny Wrote:
I agree with everything you said. I'd like to add these thoughts...
Try to get more out of each approach. Go for an insta-date, go for a makeout, more touching, more sexual innuendo, be more direct.more ballsy, more bold. The more of a connection you can make in that first interaction, the less likely she will flake.
Have you gotten any makeouts from daygame? Push hard for that. It's higher risk but higher reward.
Sometimes you meet a girl and the chemistry is there, you both can feel it, really lock into those girls and try to insta-date her. These are the ones you could be banging in 72 hours.
Its not quantity of approaches, its QUALITY of approaches. Sometimes we are so eager to learn and get in our first 1000 approaches that we go to fast, we don't push as hard as we could with each girl. Touch her, tease her, grab her hand, go get coffee, look her in the eyes, see how far you can go, see how much you can get away with. Intensify your approaches!
Another issue is target selection. If you are getting numbers from 18 year olds but none of them are calling you back, well, you might start tageting a slightly older group. You might have more success with the 25+ crowd. Try a different demographic.
My main point is this - Don't go out to get numbers, go out to make connections!
This
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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
09-17-2012, 10:08 PM
When texting OKCupid girls, before I opened the text, I would always intentionally visualize that they were rejecting/breaking it off with me in that text. It sounds weird and counter-intuitive, but it works--just like Roosh's advice for imagining every eavesdropper to your day game already hates you and thinks your lame. It helps because:
1. It desensitizes you to the worst case scenario... which isn't so bad once you imagine it 100 times.
2. It reminds you what will happen if you don't keep focused and keep your game tight.
3. You'll often feel pleasantly surprised when it doesn't occur, thinking "haha... nope, I still got it."
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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
09-18-2012, 01:09 PM
Flake rate depends enormously upon circumstance.
Numbers at Happy Hour or daygame when the chicky is sober have a *much* lower flake rate than when you quickly # close some girl you were grinding on in a club.
I don't even ask for numbers after about 10pm, I just go for ONS. Earlier on I'm doing # closes with the intent being a day 2, and I state the day 2 intent when I take the number, and try to plan it on the spot.
DISCLAIMER: I don't know what I'm talking about and my posts are opinion, not advice.
Quote:Gmac Wrote:
your time > her feelings
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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
09-25-2012, 08:48 PM
I'm wondering if we need to build more rapport over text with the 18-21 girls? I know the traditional advice is to text only a couple times and stick strictly with logistics, but does that work with the very young girls or do they need more time to "get to know you" over text before meeting up for a first date or hang out?
Not a huge sample obviously, but I got 2 numbers from day game and they both responded but then disappeared when I tried to make plans. One stopped responding after I asked to hang out (after 3 texts or so) and the other made up an excuse about having plans with her "boyfriend" (also after 3 texts or so).
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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
09-26-2012, 01:22 AM
The old logistics only text game is dead. Girls nowadays need to be warmed up through text. Sad but true.
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Everytime I Get a Number, I Now Expect Her to Flake
09-28-2012, 04:29 AM
You have to set-up the numbers so that they don't flake. This is the essence of game. For every step that you want to take, consider the step before that makes it possible.