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How to Prevent and Manage Dud Dates?
02-28-2012, 04:47 PM
I have had some good online dates. We greet with a hug and have drinks in a booth at a restaurant, bar, or concert. The conversation is personal or emotional with kino. For example, we might share anecdotes about getting caught with drugs, or sex, or having crushes, or bad dates, etc. While the timing and logistics may not produce a bang, there is certainly kissing and high expectations for the future.
In other cases the whole thing feels stiff. The greeting involves a handshake. The conversation has an interview feel, like "Name your favorite movie". The woman hardly drinks. She seems cautious and apprehensive. She fails to clearly telegraph her desire for a parting kiss. The whole experience is just a lame waste like a typical Washington Post Date Lab.
It is easy to dismiss the woman as a cold fish. But sometimes she is hot and likes me. In some cases I have recovered on future dates.
I can tell when a weak date is happening, but don't know how to steer things better. I wonder if I should manage things better, being bolder, more physical, and setting a better tone. It's like we need a giant icebreaker. Is it possible to change a cold, lame, boring date into a warm, intimate, exciting experience? Or are some women just cold, or some couples just don't click, and I should just bail out?
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How to Prevent and Manage Dud Dates?
02-28-2012, 05:18 PM
I say find a way to skip the formal stuff and hit the ground running. Bounce from place to place and avoid the interview on both sides.
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How to Prevent and Manage Dud Dates?
02-28-2012, 05:44 PM
Online dating is a screening process- you're trying to find those girls that you vibe with and who are ready to have sex quickly
There is going to be a natural attrition at each stage of the process- which is why you need to send out a lot of messages and keep a lot of online girls in your funnel at times
regardless of how well the online messaging went, when you meet in person you just won't hit it off with some of these girls- just continue to tweak your first meeting game and accept some are going to drop out-
If you're not clicking with her it's going to be apparent in the first 15 minutes at most- just set first meetings up so that you can bail out quickly or escalate physically quickly if things are going well. Plan so logistics are as easy as possible
My online conversion rate from in person meeting to bang is 40-50%- usually by the second date.
A lot of these online girls are DTF- justly dump the ones that aren't quickly and don't worry about it.
To get specific, you should not be sitting in booths or at tables- you can't kino her and sitting face to face sets up an "interview" or even confrontational scene. Sit next to her at a bar. Bounce to several venues. no concerts or movies. no sit down dinners at a table (appetizers are good). Involve alcohol as soon as possible. Meet at night or at least late afternoon so you'll be together after dark - darkness makes sex much more likely
Keep pressing on and good luck
"If anything's gonna happen, it's gonna happen out there!- Captain Ron
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How to Prevent and Manage Dud Dates?
02-28-2012, 06:03 PM
If you want a good date, do what I do.
This goes against what experts say.
For me, it works.
I run hard text message game. I build extreme attraction over text.
Roosh and The G are not into this method. Roosh has said that attraction can be lost over text, but not gained. G says to call, you dopes.
But texting works for me, and I'm able to build attraction.
This often means "blowing bitches out." That is, be direct, tell them what to do, and if sex comes up, don't hide from it.
Many girls will run away.
Those are the same girls who are dud dates.
I'm going to go through my texts to give examples (one of these days).
One example. It might be too late to use it, but it works great near the holiday:
"What was your Halloween costume?"
If she sends you a pic, she is feeling you. Run some playful game.
If she gives a boring answer and/or no pic, she's going to be lame.
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How to Prevent and Manage Dud Dates?
02-28-2012, 06:17 PM
Mike I'm sure lots of guys would like to see your text lines and transcripts
I've been limiting my texting to logistics because I felt that i screwed the pooch by bad texting game too many times
Texting is so huge now -I would like to master it
I like your concept of using text to screen the DTF girls
Go ahead and bust out that texting manual when you get a chance
"If anything's gonna happen, it's gonna happen out there!- Captain Ron
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How to Prevent and Manage Dud Dates?
03-01-2012, 10:30 PM
Nowadays, I almost always get girls on the phone before I meet up. I'm good at talking on the phone, and I can ferret out some, but not all, of the ones who will suck.
Make her come to you.
Make her come to you
Make her come to you
Practically every time I deviate from this advice, I regret it. If she ain't hungry enough to come to you, or she's too 'independent,' forget about her.
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How to Prevent and Manage Dud Dates?
03-02-2012, 12:38 AM
I agree with MikeCF on this. I've had a lot of success building attraction and getting their sexy time temp up via text. Plus, it weeds out broads that are not down to fuck. I rarely talk on the phone anymore even though I am pretty decent at that game too. Actually much better than in person, which is something I am working on.
I use it on every online hookup I do and have a 90% lay rate on first dates. Basically I use a lot of ambiguity and inuendos and get her to bring up the sex stuff. It's always best to let her go there by doing some prompting that can easily be played off as something else if she calls you on it.
It should note that since I live in a small town with few prospects I am often traveling a bit to meet these broads. Or, I am on the road and staying in hotels for weeks at a time.
If I could figure out how to download a text convo off my phone I'd try posting it. They are way too long to transcribe.
To give you an idea though, had one broad request a pic of my junk so I sent her one of a broad sucking me off. She acted extremely pissed, asking "Why would you send me that?"
"Well, you asked for a pic so I sent you a pic"
She sucked me and I bounced her head of the headboard at the hotel so I guess she wasn't really too upset.
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How to Prevent and Manage Dud Dates?
03-02-2012, 01:42 AM
I definitely use it as a screening device as they are often an hour or two away, but it also gets them warmed up and let's them know what I want. There's no way I'm traveling and not getting a piece. Even when they are coming to me they are screened and warmed as I am not a big fan of dates. For some reason I've always been that way; always going for ONS at bars, clubs, online. I know it has probably cost me plenty of lays but that's just the mentality I've always had and it seems hard to break.
The thing to remember is a lot of the broads online are DTF but won't come right out and say it. Actually, I think most all broads are DTF if a guy can talk to them enough but that's beside the point here. If you can get them talking about it they already plan on getting pumped when you do meet. Let's put it this way. If I'm in a hotel it isn't likely she's coming over unless she's planning for some sexy time, so I make sure she's properly warmed up before ever meeting so I don't waste my time meeting her for drinks.
Speaking of hotels, if that is the situation they don't know I'm from out of town until I've tested their sexual openness. Once they start talking about it they are basically ready to go and it is rare for it to be an issue as by then they just want to get laid.
To give you a better idea of what the conversation is like, it's basically just like I'm talking to her in person except via text. These broads text more than they talk on their phones anymore so it pretty normal to them. It can get a little time consuming but it's not like I can't get my other stuff done while having a text convo. I'm self employed so texting whenever I want isn't an issue like it may be for some.
Hope that helps.
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How to Prevent and Manage Dud Dates?
03-02-2012, 11:20 AM
Quote: (03-02-2012 12:38 AM)Hotwheels Wrote:
I've had a lot of success building attraction and getting their sexy time temp up via text. Plus, it weeds out broads that are not down to fuck.
I use it on every online hookup
Speaking of hotels, if that is the situation they don't know I'm from out of town until I've tested their sexual openness. Once they start talking about it they are basically ready to go and it is rare for it to be an issue as by then they just want to get laid.
What online site(s)? You are actually planning "dates" based on your travel itinerary, and then casually mention that you don't actually live there, but perhaps travel regularly or are "relocating soon"? Are you selecting only women who seek casual dating relationships instead of long-term? Are these just drink dates, sightseeing, or what?
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How to Prevent and Manage Dud Dates?
03-02-2012, 01:48 PM
I use POF and just change my location to whatever town I am working out of. I should note that I travel around the Upper Midwest, not all over the world. Not yet anyway.
Don't go by what they say they are seeking as they will generally put long term just out of habit or to protect their delicate psyche. Most of them are DTF in one way or another. Speaking of that, on POF be sure to not contact those rare ones that say they are looking for an intimate encounter as if you contact one of them it will block you from the majority of broads on there.
When I am out of town meeting these broads the most a date entails is a couple drinks or grabbing a bite to eat at a regular restaurant before heading to the hotel. Yes, I pay on these "dates". For the most part all it does is calm their fears that am I am not a psycho and after work all day I want something to eat/drink anyway so it doesn't come across as something I am doing for her.
Some might call it slow game online but it works for me and the success rate is very high. It's easy to get these broads to wait for you as you have a valid reason for not meeting right away due to distance or work. I always let them know I am busy so meeting is more difficult.