[PapayaTapper]

Here's one (legendary) way to handle it

(01-07-2016 09:23 PM)AntiTrace Wrote:  

I once had a horrible ingrown hair in the crack of my ass. Really deep down in there. I couldn't even sit down.

My girlfriend at the time, being the trooper (and disgusting bitch) she was, was all too happy to pull it out for me. She grabbed a pair of tweezers and I layed face down spread eagle in the living room floor. She proceeded to start searching for the offending ingrown.

Of course it was deep down in there and I, like many men, have a hairy ass crack. The fucking thing was camouflaged. I tell her to grab a flashlight, and to get right down in there.

So she did. And there she was, hunching over the asscheeks I was spreading open, wielding a pair of tweezers in one hand and a flash light in the other. He face was mere inches from my ass crack.

What's a man to do? Sure I want this thing plucked out. Sure I want this pain to stop. But at what cost? Was I willing to miss the golden, once in a lifetime, opportunity to show complete and utter dominance over my girlfriend just so I could be relieved of some pain?

No. I chose the pain.

So trying not to give myself away I told her "Get closer, you're almost there. Get closer you can probably see it. It hurts so bad, get closer"

And she did.

Closer she got...

then closer..

and even closer...

And right before she could pluck that horrible ingrown asshair...with her face so close that my ass hairs were tickling her nostrils, I pushed out the loudest, nastiest, beer fart that I could muster.

She revolted backwards against the wall, slamming her head off the closet door in the process. Slapping at her face with one hand, like she was trying to exorcise a demon, and rubbing the back of her head with her other, screaming all sorts of obscenities. I jumped out, giggy as could be, and pumped my fists into the air to celebrate my accomplishment.

That is my fondest memory of that relationship. So yeah, them bitches do some nasty grooming from time to time. But I appreciate it.