End Game? How do you think you will end up?
07-26-2011, 03:43 PM
Hello, I am a twice married, twice divorced 59 year old who has discovered the PUA community largely through Glenn Reynolds Instapundit -- Glenn's always been a fan of Roissy and his blog. And, if you don't follow Instapundit, a recurring theme with Glenn is his dismay at the increasing feminization -- and beta -ization -- of men in the culture.
I've been lurking on this forum for the past couple of weeks...and this thread gives me the perfect opportunity to chime in.
Up until I was married the first time -- I was 25 -- I loved the conquest of ladies. I don't think I ever acquired the notches some of you on here did, but I had good luck, with 3-4 hookups every year until I got married. When I got divorced -- at 30 -- we were both effectively poor, so no financial hits, just a parting of the ways.
At that point, I started going to business school in Chicago -- and boy, was that nice. Yes women were career driven, but they were so focused on work they had no time to "develop" a relationship, it was go to class, fuck, study -- rinse and repeat. Oh, a few were trying to land the next investment banker, but you could always tell which ones were trying to land a husband and a degree simultaneously.
From about 33 when I finished, until 38, when I got married, it was, as the German U-Boat captains said in the early part of the war, the "happy time." To keep the metaphor going, I was firing my torpedo more or less on a continuous basis. Waitresses, actresses, executive types, dental assistants. I loved taking the El -- I met two women on there one year who became more or less ongoing FWBs. The game was simple, look, smile, get off their stop, approach, chat, "Want to have coffee?" arrange to meet. The actress turned out to live around the corner from me, and I could call her up anytime and say, "Want to get together?" and I would go over and fire away.
Well, I got married at 38, had a kid, bought a suburban house, and settled into the life of boring domesticity. Started a couple of businesses, one failed, one did OK, which I sold. As soon as the kid got to college, divorce. This time though a bit of financial hit, but not too bad.
So, 56 out on my own again. Nice little house -- not a McMansion, but nice. And I thought I am going to be beating off until dirt nap time.
Boy, was I wrong. Even at my age there are opportunities EVERYwhere. I do the POF, OKCupid, Craigslist thing, in addition to the day game stuff...and have met dozens of women. Alas, too old for the nightclub scene, but the very upscale hotel bar scene has been productive.
Love the 40-year old married women whose husbands are either boring or simply not equipped. One told me "I love doing it with you -- we can do it sideways but he's so small he can't get it in there." One 43 year old I had a year long fling with looked like Rachel Ray and paid for everything -- hotel rooms, weekends away.
And the young ones with Daddy issues! They are the best. I see this Harvard junior every time she is home on summer vacation, or winter/spring break. "All the boys I know are just boys..." she says. Likes it a bit rough, happy to oblige.
Anyway, the game is not over when you pass 35. Now, you are not necessarily going to bang the tight skinned 25 year olds, you will have to go up in age range, but let me tell, the 40 somethings can be quite something, especially if they are doing yoga and pilates regularly.
Here are some things though I think are crucial to keep the game going, well into the 60s.
--Stay fit. I workout like a maniac -- I have done P90x twice, and am trying to do Insanity -- at 59. Gotta work out 6 days a week. No excuses.
--Stay healthy. That means see a doctor, once a year, know your cholesterol and blood pressure, get it under control. I do not use the little blue pill...and will work like hell to avoid it.
--Get a vasectomy. Yes condoms are essential, but if you don't want any more kids, why even the remotest risk?
--Stay technologically savvy. If I see a nice looking woman with an iPhone, I ask her, "What's your favorite app?" She tells me, and then asks me, and I tell her "Dragon Naturally Speaking" -- a voice recognition program where you can speak into the phone and text comes out. I say, "Just met a stimulating woman" -- (not a compliment, not a neg) -- and show her the text on the screen. A great opener.
--Stay culturally up do date. Know the top TV shows, hot bands (this for the youngsters). For the white college chicks, you need to know who Arcade Fire is, and why they are important.
--Dress well. You're older, so the American Eagle look won't cut it. I love Tommy Bahama -- elegant, projects taste, understated.
--Find a good dermatologist. I won't do plastic surgery, but face peels are very effective.
--Drive a NICE car...but not a flashy car. I could afford a Benz or a Lexus, but I like the high-end Hondas -- leather interior. An Acura would be fine. No Porsche's or, God forbid, a Vette. Reeks of the mid-life crisis.
Finally, here's the thing you have to keep in mind. While there will be occasional 8s and above, for the most part they will be the exception rather than the rule. And things aren't going to be as frequent.
But there is no reason why you can't have a reasonably active sex life with good variety.