INteresting how she tried to derail theonversation, but you allowed it:

Her: i was pretty upset last night. I didnt know you were THAT serious about the 120lbs. Is that whats keeping you from calling me something more special?

YOU SHOULD HAVE SAID: "Yes. <plus something else if you want.. "I really like you a lot emotionally...>

YOU SAID-- ( Getting off the subject cuz you were scared to confront her.)
Me: would it really change anything if we were official?


NOW she can change the conversation into being abot anything.....
Her: i think thats pretty irrelevant.

Me: how so?


NOW she has inferred from your lack of focus on weight that you really have a generalized avoidance of 1:1 love ; and she expresses that.

She wants to get married before her expiration date. You're fucking other chicks and not telling her ?

She senses something

Her: because if its that, then there will always be something you dislike that bothers you. I dont want to be some kind of compromise, or a pet project thats not perfect in your eyes.

Quote: (08-20-2012 11:29 AM)Timoteo Wrote:  

Quote: (08-20-2012 04:34 AM)daygamedatingcoach Wrote:  

dump her then she will get thinner more beautiful, courageous and strong then you can never have her back

It seems like the most effective way of getting a bitch to go to the gym is to break up with her. They'll lose weight and tighten up to spite you, but not to make you happy when they're with you.

experienced?

Quote: (08-20-2012 11:29 AM)Timoteo Wrote:  

Quote: (08-20-2012 04:34 AM)daygamedatingcoach Wrote:  

dump her then she will get thinner more beautiful, courageous and strong then you can never have her back

It seems like the most effective way of getting a bitch to go to the gym is to break up with her. They'll lose weight and tighten up to spite you, but not to make you happy when they're with you.

experienced?

Beta indeed. You are simply not the leader in this relationship.

Your relationship is going to deteriorate unless you take charge.

You don't tell her something is bothering you. As a man, you don't get bothered.

Instead you let her know up front that you have expectations that must be met.

If she chooses not to meet these expectations, you respect her decision.

"You are a great girl and a lot of guys will be all over you. We're not not where we need you to be right now."

If you can't tell a girl that she's great and should find a guy who has lower expectations (because you're afraid she'll leave you), then you're going to get cheated on, anyway, and may as well get out while you can.

I got my current main squeeze to really tighten up by telling her she was getting fat. She wasn't, really, maybe 5 lbs overweight max, but she listened and lost it. I gave her tips like not eating breakfast and ditching grains, and it did wonders.

She still likes to give me shit about "that time I told her she was fat" but I'm still fucking her.

@ mike & iknowexactly

Thanks for the insights.

I guess i avoided confronting her head on
because it could be hard to control over text.

As for expectations, that is EXACTLY what told her last time i saw her. I said i liked her, but this is what i wanted in a relationship. Im sure she could find another guy with lower standards if she wanted.

I do have my beta moments, but shes pretty crazy about me.

Quote: (08-20-2012 06:59 PM)daygamedatingcoach Wrote:  

Quote: (08-20-2012 11:29 AM)Timoteo Wrote:  

Quote: (08-20-2012 04:34 AM)daygamedatingcoach Wrote:  

dump her then she will get thinner more beautiful, courageous and strong then you can never have her back

It seems like the most effective way of getting a bitch to go to the gym is to break up with her. They'll lose weight and tighten up to spite you, but not to make you happy when they're with you.

experienced?

Some women start losing weight and dressing better because they're over you and looking for a new man before they leave the relationship (most American girls behave like this).

Guys shouldn't assume just because she's losing weight or putting effort into her appearance that it's for you. When you know you know.

Not eatting breakfast is not a good idea.

If you want to skip a meal, skip dinner.

Quote: (08-21-2012 12:04 AM)T and A Man Wrote:  

Not eatting breakfast is not a good idea.

If you want to skip a meal, skip dinner.

False.

Breakfast causes a severe peak in insulin after consumption, unlike any other meal because of increased cortisol levels after waking.

Its almost as bad for weight loss as eating lots of small meals throughout the day.

Check out leangains hombre

Quote: (08-20-2012 11:09 PM)Gmac Wrote:  

Quote: (08-20-2012 06:59 PM)daygamedatingcoach Wrote:  

Quote: (08-20-2012 11:29 AM)Timoteo Wrote:  

Quote: (08-20-2012 04:34 AM)daygamedatingcoach Wrote:  

dump her then she will get thinner more beautiful, courageous and strong then you can never have her back

It seems like the most effective way of getting a bitch to go to the gym is to break up with her. They'll lose weight and tighten up to spite you, but not to make you happy when they're with you.

experienced?

Some women start losing weight and dressing better because they're over you and looking for a new man before they leave the relationship (most American girls behave like this).

Guys shouldn't assume just because she's losing weight or putting effort into her appearance that it's for you. When you know you know.

No, I haven't had a chick do this to me personally, but I've listened to them talk over many years. All of those, "I'll show him" or "I'll make him jealous" rants. Women are often more motivated by something negative than something positive. Deep down, they know they've slipped, but for some reason they resent the guy they're with and won't do it for him. But they know they're too sloppy to get something else, so they'll tighten up to go back out and attract someone new. Then the cycle will repeat.

Most women don't like to exercise where 60-70% of the problem of people getting fat is the intake of food.

I eat very healthy where we do our weekly shopping together. When she puts junk food in the shopping trolley I say no and put it back. I allow one treat a week, just like I would a child!

At home to make it fun instead of eating out (we are lucky to eat out once a week), I get a new healthy recipe from the internet where we cook together. She does most of the work cause I tell her it's her job to feed her man and family! I usually grin my hard cock against her while she is leaning against the bench cocking for me! She knows I'm a traditionist where I told her if she doesn't like traditional roles that keep our ancestors together, she can fuck off!!!

I have tried to do physical activities together with many women over the years where I find most people don't like anything really physical BUT they enjoy a good walk so walking for 1-2 hours usually on the weekend is our thing even tho I prefer running.

It's very important to set rules with your woman where I don't tolerate bullshit and I'm in charge. I'm the man where she is welcome to discuss things with me but I have the finally say on the matter. If she doesn't like being with a man, she can fuck off and date a weak beta male that had no balls! She knows I can have a new woman in less than a week!

I've set rules where if she puts on more than 5kg, we are over! She crossed that line once before where I moved out. While ignoring her calls and sms, she dropped the extra weight ASAP. Beforehand I gave her a week or two to decrease the weight where I increased my social media intake (get some new numbers while giving her little attention for punishment for trying to become a land whale like Lindy West).

If she is going through a tough time, I'll give her some slack but once the grieving process is over she has to show improvement in the weight department or I'll kick her to the curve!

I also told her that it's not my fault, if she puts on 2 much weight I won't be able to keep my erection up (fat really kills my boner) and i'll start looking at other women. I tell her I think she is the most attractive person on this planet but only at her current weight!

Best to defaultly find a woman that looks after herself for a long term relationship where her family is slim and healthy for their age (healthy upbringing).

People that eat unhealthy all the time are drugs addicts! Who the fuck wants to be in a relationship with a drug addict!?! I also tell her this and that I don't want to be around a fucking junkie!

In my experience if you skip breakfast you will end up eating it later in the day, possibly after dinner. It's not a good idea to skip meals. You will probably end up consuming too many calories overall. When you talk about food everyone has an opinion. That's why I started by saying, in my experience. What works for you may not work for everyone. Diet and lifestyle aside, many people look that way they look because of their heredity. Not much you can do about that.

Good Luck with that LTR, Eastern. You sound like a barrel of monkeys. That doesn't sound like a relationship built on mutual respect. By the way it's "kick her to the curb". (That's what you do with trash cans)

WTF at the answers here...? If you want her to lose weight tell her. I told a chick I was fuckin she needs to lose weight. I was just straight up and honest about it. After we fucked I said she'd look a lot better if she starts working out and I prefer women who are in shape.

You might lose her you might not. Win win either way. You gotta be willing to take the L.

In that case the girl agreed and was like "oh i knooowww I'm gonna get back in the gym". Few weeks later she's calling/texting me how she's been working out and eating better and sending me pics and asking me for workout advice and how she's glad she started working out again.

I mean I don't get why not just tell the bitch. I told several chicks I was fuckin that if they wanted more of me they'd have to hit the gym or for some girls I was fuckin if they started getting fat I let them know. I mean fuck if they leave they leave. I think tip toeing around it is the wrong approach and more dangerously, the wrong MENTALITY.

I think it's a bit useless to keep giving him suggestions after five years lol.

"Nice jeans babe. I saw those same ones on another girl only they were a size smaller and looked really great"

If you can neg her into an eating disorder then you might have a keeper

Quote: (07-09-2017 09:52 PM)easternwomenrule Wrote:  

People that eat unhealthy all the time are drugs addicts! Who the fuck wants to be in a relationship with a drug addict!?! I also tell her this and that I don't want to be around a fucking junkie!

True. It's such a touchy subject with a lot of women being very offended by this and I don't quite understand why there isn't more fat shaming or fat warnings. Why is it bad for someone to be an alcoholic, but it's ok to be addicted to junk food. People are fighting so hard to not be labeled addicts and to normalize this behavior.

I've been trying to make my gf lose weight (her BMI is on the very lower end of overweight) and holy shit is it difficult - I've tried asking nicely, asking directly, cooking healthy for her, straight up not allowing her to eat junk food. At this point, I've pretty much figured that I can't make her do it. She's rebelling and calling me controlling. She "wants" to lose weight but oooooh the excuses - they are countless. I'm on the verge of walking away, which is a bummer, because she has some great qualities otherwise and I'm pretty tired of having relationships that don't work.

Quote: (07-10-2017 03:56 PM)GreenHills Wrote:  

Quote: (07-09-2017 09:52 PM)easternwomenrule Wrote:  

People that eat unhealthy all the time are drugs addicts! Who the fuck wants to be in a relationship with a drug addict!?! I also tell her this and that I don't want to be around a fucking junkie!

True. It's such a touchy subject with a lot of women being very offended by this and I don't quite understand why there isn't more fat shaming or fat warnings. Why is it bad for someone to be an alcoholic, but it's ok to be addicted to junk food. People are fighting so hard to not be labeled addicts and to normalize this behavior.

I've been trying to make my gf lose weight (her BMI is on the very lower end of overweight) and holy shit is it difficult - I've tried asking nicely, asking directly, cooking healthy for her, straight up not allowing her to eat junk food. At this point, I've pretty much figured that I can't make her do it. She's rebelling and calling me controlling. She "wants" to lose weight but oooooh the excuses - they are countless. I'm on the verge of walking away, which is a bummer, because she has some great qualities otherwise and I'm pretty tired of having relationships that don't work.

Dread game.

Much easier to find another slimmer woman than to convince her to lose it, and then maintain it off.

^ This. Abundance mentality - women are fungible.

You can't reason with "the oldest teenager in the room." Oftentimes, "the juice is not worth the squeeze."

My overweight coworker talks about how she's going to get her "revenge body" and leave her husband. My ex confessed the same to me. I've NEVER heard a woman say she's going to lose weight (or otherwise improve herself) for her man. It seems antithetical to their princess/special snowflake nature, an unacceptable loss of female frame, if you will.

Quote: (07-11-2017 05:13 AM)MMM Wrote:  

My overweight coworker talks about how she's going to get her "revenge body" and leave her husband. My ex confessed the same to me. I've NEVER heard a woman say she's going to lose weight (or otherwise improve herself) for her man. It seems antithetical to their princess/special snowflake nature, an unacceptable loss of female frame, if you will.

True

but

it does not mean you can't covertly lead her to losing weight/getting in shape, because you already know that that's what she wants deep inside

Quote: (07-11-2017 12:33 AM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  

Much easier to find another slimmer woman than to convince her to lose it, and then maintain it off.

Is it? I'm looking for a lifetime partner, wife, however you wanna call it. People on this forum are going all over the globe looking for the same and it doesn't exactly seem easy. I can get a thin woman, but she might be a bitch. Replace her. Another slim woman, but she's addicted to her career. Replace her. A nice woman, but she's a bit overweight. Replace her. etc. etc.

I rather put maximum effort into what I have to work with then restart again on someone with a new set of problems.

Quote: (07-10-2017 03:56 PM)GreenHills Wrote:  

I've been trying to make my gf lose weight (her BMI is on the very lower end of overweight) and holy shit is it difficult - I've tried asking nicely, asking directly, cooking healthy for her, straight up not allowing her to eat junk food. At this point, I've pretty much figured that I can't make her do it. She's rebelling and calling me controlling. She "wants" to lose weight but oooooh the excuses - they are countless. I'm on the verge of walking away, which is a bummer, because she has some great qualities otherwise and I'm pretty tired of having relationships that don't work.

Quote:David Deida Wrote:

If you know that your woman would be healthier if she exercised more, don’t tell her that. It will feel like an insult to her, a rejection of her the way she is. Instead, tell her how sexy she is when she sweats in her leotards. Tell her how much it turns you on when she moves her body.

from The Way of the Superior Man

Quote: (08-05-2012 05:12 AM)ElJefe Wrote:  

My main squeeze wants a relationship and the only thing stopping me is the fact she's 10lbs from a goddess-like figure (= BMI 20). How do I say this? She's not fat just not slim the way I like 'em. Other than this single item she's very worthy.

1. Fuck relationships
2. 10 pounds isn't that much, but if it's too much for you, why even fuck her?
3. Just keep fucking her and avoid relationships

[nonsense post]