[Alpone]

I see a lot of guys asking what to text next, regretting texts, or asking if a text was beta. I also see a lot of guys needlessly responding to girls who flake, disrespect them, or who text other things which show disinterest in them. I see guys constantly asking if not responding to a text looks weak or butthurt.

My philosophy is this: It almost never looks weak to not respond to a text. Not responding to a flake, a disrespectful comment or a girl your intuition tells you is disinterested is almost always the best course of action assuming you're not in a relationship with her. Not responding to a text is empowering. It puts you in control. It takes discipline.

I've been testing this with a few girls in my pipeline and have been merciless in weeding out flakes and girls I perceive to have an interest level below 70%. One questionable text, one perceived slight, one flake and they never hear from me again. It feels good. I know for every girl who fucks up on txt there's another one around the corner who is on point, attentive and has higher interest levels.

Stop trying to recover shit text exchanges with disinterested chicks. Stop responding to every turd a girl dumps on your phone. Be selective with who you give your attention to.

Chicks live on attention. Denying them your attention is the best karma for a girl who makes it clear you're not a priority.

Your silence will make you live in their mind forever. And you will find it easier to next her for someone better.

In conclusion, do not be afraid to not respond. When in doubt, it's almost always the right answer.

[PapayaTapper]

(04-30-2019 05:22 PM)Alpone Wrote:  

I see a lot of guys asking what to text next, regretting texts, or asking if a text was beta. I also see a lot of guys needlessly responding to girls who flake, disrespect them, or who text other things which show disinterest in them. I see guys constantly asking if not responding to a text looks weak or butthurt.

My philosophy is this: It almost never looks weak to not respond to a text. Not responding to a flake, a disrespectful comment or a girl your intuition tells you is disinterested is almost always the best course of action assuming you're not in a relationship with her. Not responding to a text is empowering. It puts you in control. It takes discipline.

I've been testing this with a few girls in my pipeline and have been merciless in weeding out flakes and girls I perceive to have an interest level below 70%. One questionable text, one perceived slight, one flake and they never hear from me again. It feels good. I know for every girl who fucks up on txt there's another one around the corner who is on point, attentive and has higher interest levels.

Stop trying to recover shit text exchanges with disinterested chicks. Stop responding to every turd a girl dumps on your phone. Be selective with who you give your attention to.

Chicks live on attention. Denying them your attention is the best karma for a girl who makes it clear you're not a priority.

Your silence will make you live in their mind forever. And you will find it easier to next her for someone better.

In conclusion, do not be afraid to not respond. When in doubt, it's almost always the right answer.

^ Correct. Nothing you do will ever game a girl for you as well or as much as her own imagination.

[lonewolf1992]

There's a stupid lefty yet hot girl I fucked who flaked a few times on me. I always end up deleting her, blocking her, and never replying to her excuses. She always come back after months either with a fake fb profile or different number telling me how much I've been in her mind. I just ghosted her for the 4th time on february and I assume either she won't reply or she'll show up in august or september regretful and eager to fuck with me. I'm in a point I don't even care about not responding to a text. It's like a part of this sport called 'game'. It shouldn't be like that but that's the way it is.

[travolta]

Good post. This applies pretty strongly to girls that you've already fucked as well. With a couple girls recently that I've banged (and otherwise thought we had a great time), they've ghosted for no reason. With each of them they take days to reply, then finally text back with something pointless or a 1 word response. Going forward I'll definitely ignore girls like this. If a girl takes days to reply (unless she replies and apologizes), she is likely no longer interested in you.

[Donfitz007]

I learned this from Robert Greene, which has been a recurring theme in his books. Master the art of absence. It's kinda like the push and pull method, flood her with attention and right when she gets a little familiar with it, take it way.

I found mid day text to be best after sex. Especially if it's the first time.

Great Post!

[rudebwoy]

Someone stated give her the gift of silence.

Great post OP

[Heuristics]

This is something I definitely need to work on. I've always been too responsive when texting. I started doubling the amount of time to reply to text messages, when compared to the girl, which seemed like a good idea. I haven't though much about being unresponsive, but it's something I'll try out.

[RDF]

Absolutely agreed.

Sometimes when you don't respond, a girl actually ends up coming back to you. If I'm stuck in a boring conversation that's going nowhere, I just bail out by not answering. Pretty often, a girl will later re-initiate the convo and be far more receptive and attracted than beforehand.

Obviously that doesn't happen all of the time, but it doesn't really matter to me. If she comes back, great. If she doesn't come back, that's fine too, because it probably wasn't happening anyway and I'm saving myself some valuable time.

[Checkmat]

This is my policy if I’m feeling like a needy bitch. Better to not text at all than send something weak.

[RatInTheWoods]

Great advice. I see many young guys are in the frame of having to reply to texts immediately, which is a cultural tech thing, but bad for game.

[whiteknightrises]

(04-30-2019 05:22 PM)Alpone Wrote:  

I see a lot of guys asking what to text next, regretting texts, or asking if a text was beta. I also see a lot of guys needlessly responding to girls who flake, disrespect them, or who text other things which show disinterest in them. I see guys constantly asking if not responding to a text looks weak or butthurt.

My philosophy is this: It almost never looks weak to not respond to a text. Not responding to a flake, a disrespectful comment or a girl your intuition tells you is disinterested is almost always the best course of action assuming you're not in a relationship with her. Not responding to a text is empowering. It puts you in control. It takes discipline.

I've been testing this with a few girls in my pipeline and have been merciless in weeding out flakes and girls I perceive to have an interest level below 70%. One questionable text, one perceived slight, one flake and they never hear from me again. It feels good. I know for every girl who fucks up on txt there's another one around the corner who is on point, attentive and has higher interest levels.

Stop trying to recover shit text exchanges with disinterested chicks. Stop responding to every turd a girl dumps on your phone. Be selective with who you give your attention to.

Chicks live on attention. Denying them your attention is the best karma for a girl who makes it clear you're not a priority.

Your silence will make you live in their mind forever. And you will find it easier to next her for someone better.

In conclusion, do not be afraid to not respond. When in doubt, it's almost always the right answer.

An actual good post.

Have some self-respect.

If some bitch sends u something retarded u dont have to reply (she does the same to you)

The best is when there's a "read receipt" - that shit drives them crazy/they'll prob hit you up later like when they're drunk (but only if they like you)

[cruzinV]

I always respond, but never do double texts. If actually had more prospects then sure i wouldnt respond, but when you only have 1 MAYBE 2, then you dont have that luxury.

[spydersuit]

I agree. Don’t respond to text messages. Bonus - don’t respond to a message seeking a date or meetup.

[PapayaTapper]

This thread topic is really about your male logical brain that wants the closure of question asked and answered. Combined with social conditioning that its rude not to respond.

Its actually very analogous to the issue regarding answering direct questions. Here are some of my posts in related threads on the matter

(01-07-2018 04:33 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

(01-07-2018 03:52 PM)treypound Wrote:  

Either in text or in person, how do you handle women who don't answer direct questions you ask them?

Learn from them

(10-02-2018 12:32 AM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

Shit test

Her "When is the last time you had sex?"

PT "Do you always wear white pants after Labor Day? That's kind of weird but I guess fashion isn't as important to girls as it used to be"

Shit tests are best dismissed.

Ignore direct questions.

Game 101

(04-10-2019 10:23 AM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

If youre banging girls on the regular that dont seem to be testing then whats the problem?

But if youre not then maybe youre getting tested and dont realize it.


Some, especially very attractive and smart girls often shit test very subtly rather than directly. Sometimes they dont even do it consciously...but they do.

Two most common stealth shit tests:

1. Questions

A question, any question, can serve as a shit test.

For example (And Ive used this before): Youre at a bar drinking a beer and a woman you just met asks you "What are you drinking?" She knows youre drinking a beer: She can see youre drinking a beer.

You answer logically "A beer"

Shit test failed...and you didn't even know you were being tested.

Answering direct questions with direct answers it a shit test fail. It shows youre following her into her frame.

You want to pass the "question" test? Ignore it and ask a question of your own

Her "What are you drinking?"

PT "You always wear white after Labor Day?" ( Or some other non sequitur ).

The point is youre going to lead the interaction...Not her.

And thats what she's looking for

2. Eye contact.

I know this has been discussed ad-naseum on the forum but its worth repeating. Its one of the "fundamentals" thats easy to forget in the heat of the moment especially if inside youre thinking "damn this chicks hot".

If you can confidently (not creepily) hold eye contact the first time you see / meet a girl and make her break off first you are well on your way to passing her subsequent shit tests.

Even the ones you dont see coming.

There's a reason chicks respond to assholes / bad boys / sociopaths. Its because girls are hardwired to follow strength and not falling into her frame is a form strength. Those guys are natural catnip to girls because their "IDAF" attitude is authentic...they really dont care because they cant

The good news is that us "normal" guys can learn to effectively mimic that asshole / sociopath game with a bit of practice

[macschneider]

(04-30-2019 05:22 PM)Alpone Wrote:  

do not be afraid to not respond.

Nice. The medium is the message.

[travolta]

(05-01-2019 07:22 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

For example (And Ive used this before): Youre at a bar drinking a beer and a woman you just met asks you "What are you drinking?" She knows youre drinking a beer: She can see youre drinking a beer.

You answer logically "A beer"

Shit test failed...and you didn't even know you were being tested.

I don't know man, I think you're overanalyzing this. I think a lot of guys are going to read this piece of advice and start saying some REALLY weird shit. If a girl asked me what I'm drinking, I respond that I'm drinking a beer, and she somehow thinks I failed her shit test, then she's probably not the type of person I want to associate with anyway. She's simply an idiot who is best ignored, regardless of how hot she is.

[Rang off the Pipe]

I can see the merit of not answering questions directly, especially in the night time. However, some girls are going to give you a hard time anyway purely for entertainment. The other night I was talking to a girl (her fat friend was also there, of course), who was no more than a 6 at best. One of the first words out of her mouth is the question "What do you do for work?", which in the context of the environment was a completely needless and pointless question (and a common one in the US). I didn't answer it directly, but even if I did it's not like this girl was going to be receptive anyway. Shortly, thereafter, she left with her friend to get a drink, as is the usual with girls who want to make an excuse to leave. If a girl is interested, she generally won't make things more difficult than they need to be.

[spydersuit]

Her: what do you do for work?

Me: I am a Creative Director at Pornhub

[heavy]

Something I did more in my younger days of game. It works. Good reminder.

I'm going to re-institute.

[Dalaran1991]

(05-01-2019 11:55 PM)travolta Wrote:  

(05-01-2019 07:22 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

For example (And Ive used this before): Youre at a bar drinking a beer and a woman you just met asks you "What are you drinking?" She knows youre drinking a beer: She can see youre drinking a beer.

You answer logically "A beer"

Shit test failed...and you didn't even know you were being tested.

I don't know man, I think you're overanalyzing this. I think a lot of guys are going to read this piece of advice and start saying some REALLY weird shit. If a girl asked me what I'm drinking, I respond that I'm drinking a beer, and she somehow thinks I failed her shit test, then she's probably not the type of person I want to associate with anyway. She's simply an idiot who is best ignored, regardless of how hot she is.

With Travolta here. I'm surprised the above comes from Papaya, since it's more what a robotic gamey newbie would say.
You should not see a shit test everywhere. Sometimes people just want to connect with you. Some are flirty, and some are plain clumsy. From what I've observed women are incredibly bad at flirting. A girl asking me what I am drinking is a huge fucking IOI, she might just be a bit clumsy at it. Why make it weird for her?

A girl asking you "how much do you make" in a club setting, now that might be a shit test. "How old are you" might be up for debate.

Regarding texting. Ignore a text if you don't feel like responding, totally. But ignore it strategically for a better ROI? Doubt it. This whole "playing aloof" game is so pre-Mystery and has been debunked many times by veteran slayers like WIA. Unless you already fucked her or she's already into you, ignoring a text simply makes the girl forget you while she responds to a hundred other texts. If you ignore a text because you don't like it, then restart text a bit later, that's another thing.

[Prince Charming]

Good insight op but you are wrong on two points.
1. it definitely works on girls youre in a relationship with too. I have some 400+ unanswered messages in insta from one girl I have been banging for 3 years, in whatsapp I respond to maybe 50% of when she sends. I can bang her whenever I want and she is even faithful wile she knows I bang hundreds of other girls

2. you are still being too reactive with this all or nothing, never talk to her again, attitude. I dont respond to messages girls send unless its logistics or a complement but I will always reengage on my terms within a few days, weeks or months depending on the situation. dont delete a girls number unless she asked you to. you never know what her situation is or when it will change in your favor.

[Obermarschall]

The same can be said in general; stop not only texting to women, but also to others! I used to waste so much time texting about senseless stuff and it gave me 0. Nowadays where I text less and less, I feel much better and the only times I text is if it's business-related (HIGHEST priority) or for a nice fuck.

[PapayaTapper]

I can see where my "shit test" post can seem disconnected

Not intending to derail or confuse the thread...just trying to illustrate some broad game concepts that I feel are relevant to the theme of this thread which Id title

"When is less, more?"

(05-01-2019 11:55 PM)travolta Wrote:  

(05-01-2019 07:22 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

For example (And Ive used this before): Youre at a bar drinking a beer and a woman you just met asks you "What are you drinking?" She knows youre drinking a beer: She can see youre drinking a beer.

You answer logically "A beer"

Shit test failed...and you didn't even know you were being tested.

I don't know man, I think you're overanalyzing this. I think a lot of guys are going to read this piece of advice and start saying some REALLY weird shit. If a girl asked me what I'm drinking, I respond that I'm drinking a beer, and she somehow thinks I failed her shit test, then she's probably not the type of person I want to associate with anyway. She's simply an idiot who is best ignored, regardless of how hot she is.

I am primarily directing the above towards initial meets in person, at bar, lounge, party, etc venues

People are visceral. Men primarily visually, women primarily emotionally*. *As its been said a million times. Your looks get you on the "elevator" (metaphorically) with her but your rap determines how long the ride is and whether she steps off in the lobby or your bedroom (literally)

You think she will remember what words you said 30 seconds later? Of course not. What she'll remember is what you made her feel about you. More specifically what shes feeling in your interaction.

"Weird" = creepy. Of course thats not good. But a direct answer is boring, and thats almost as bad as creepy.

But weird + confidence = interesting / mysterious (Mystery Method is certainly dated as fuck... but the fundamentals still hold)

Im not saying respond with something "creepy". Im saying dont respond with a direct answer to her direct question. A non-sequitur is an easy pattern interrupt that wrests control in the interaction and gives you a chance to direct the conversation to where you want it to go (her qualifying for you...not the other way around. The other way around is you answering her questions, and losing power...and ergo her attraction to you).

(05-02-2019 09:30 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

With Travolta here. I'm surprised the above comes from Papaya, since it's more what a robotic gamey newbie would say.
You should not see a shit test everywhere. Sometimes people just want to connect with you. Some are flirty, and some are plain clumsy. From what I've observed women are incredibly bad at flirting. A girl asking me what I am drinking is a huge fucking IOI, she might just be a bit clumsy at it. Why make it weird for her?

Logically distinguishing between distinct IOI and possible shit test requires nuance. Misreading either is a mistake that can lead to a lost opportunity

(05-02-2019 09:30 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

A girl asking you "how much do you make" in a club setting, now that might be a shit test. "How old are you" might be up for debate.

Regarding texting. Ignore a text if you don't feel like responding, totally. But ignore it strategically for a better ROI? Doubt it. This whole "playing aloof" game is so pre-Mystery and has been debunked many times by veteran slayers like WIA. Unless you already fucked her or she's already into you, ignoring a text simply makes the girl forget you while she responds to a hundred other texts. If you ignore a text because you don't like it, then restart text a bit later, that's another thing.

OP was specifically addressing chicks already established in the pipeline or rotation. Of course this makes a difference.

But with texting generally speaking "less is more" with more being better

[spydersuit]

(05-02-2019 09:30 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

(05-01-2019 11:55 PM)travolta Wrote:  

(05-01-2019 07:22 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

For example (And Ive used this before): Youre at a bar drinking a beer and a woman you just met asks you "What are you drinking?" She knows youre drinking a beer: She can see youre drinking a beer.

You answer logically "A beer"

Shit test failed...and you didn't even know you were being tested.

I don't know man, I think you're overanalyzing this. I think a lot of guys are going to read this piece of advice and start saying some REALLY weird shit. If a girl asked me what I'm drinking, I respond that I'm drinking a beer, and she somehow thinks I failed her shit test, then she's probably not the type of person I want to associate with anyway. She's simply an idiot who is best ignored, regardless of how hot she is.

With Travolta here. I'm surprised the above comes from Papaya, since it's more what a robotic gamey newbie would say.
You should not see a shit test everywhere. Sometimes people just want to connect with you. Some are flirty, and some are plain clumsy. From what I've observed women are incredibly bad at flirting. A girl asking me what I am drinking is a huge fucking IOI, she might just be a bit clumsy at it. Why make it weird for her?

A girl asking you "how much do you make" in a club setting, now that might be a shit test. "How old are you" might be up for debate.

Regarding texting. Ignore a text if you don't feel like responding, totally. But ignore it strategically for a better ROI? Doubt it. This whole "playing aloof" game is so pre-Mystery and has been debunked many times by veteran slayers like WIA. Unless you already fucked her or she's already into you, ignoring a text simply makes the girl forget you while she responds to a hundred other texts. If you ignore a text because you don't like it, then restart text a bit later, that's another thing.

Debunked? Hardly. I stop texting with some young women and it works well. Obviously, there are big differences in how each individual responds and this is where reading your audience comes into play.

Cutting off communication works well with (1) women that have daddy issues, (2) women where you are socially out of their league (status), (3) women where you are financially out of their league (status), and (4) hot women that see other girls actively pursuing you.

[travolta]

I still disagree with avoiding direct answers all the time. A little bit here and there is great, as it can add a sense of mystery and humor to the situation, but newbies need to be very careful with doing this. Years back David DeAngelo once recommended "never give a direct answer unless it's no" (lols) and I took this advice pretty serious. I didn't give any direct answers, and I came across extremely weird. There have also been many times when a girl asked me "what do you do?" and I avoided her answer with an indirect answer.. many times girls will get frustrated with you and walk off. I remember this one girl legitimately got upset that I wouldn't answer her. She walked away from me pissed off asking why I wouldn't just answer her. She was genuinely curious. This was a girl in the US..

However, I do think avoiding direct answers can work well if you have "advanced" game and really have your act together. It's definitely a fine line though, and is easy to come across as being weird as fuck if you don't pull it off properly.