^ A girl can turn heads in ever room without having to act like a slut or attention-seeker, though. It's not an either/or dichotomy. All it takes is them being a gorgeous girl with some great curves and a pleasing personality, not having a slut vibe.
My woman is so shy she's generally clammed up even to the point of physically hiding her face when meeting strangers (Ah Asian women... lol), but men are still constantly drooling over her and approaching her anyways, inevitably staring at her hips and ass one by one as we walk by. Boys will be boys.
So while I can appreciate the taste of that kind of ego gratification, if other men desiring your woman is what you're after, I can't see how whether they're quiet or not makes much of a difference.
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Actually she would bring me out of my shell I'm not quiet by any means but she would bring more of it out of me, and I would reign her in a bit.
If she's your actual girl and not just a bang, and you refer to her as "the party girl" and describe yourself as the one who has to "reign her in a bit," well, I'm sorry to say that you may have some rude awakenings in your future, my friend. Not trying to put you on the spot. If it's just about the sex, by all means, enjoy. If not, be careful.
As for your last paragraph (ex girl was a virgin, but you didn't know how erotic women were until you met the new one)...I think you're kind of missing the point. My point is sex can be highly erotic with most girls if you just lead the way to high eroticism. After all, if she's only "ok" in bed and the only guys she's ever had to teach her is you, whose fault is it really?
Of course, if you only had a short relationship together, that makes sense, but my point is that judging by all the comments you've made about your dynamic with your girls, you don't sound like much of a leader in the relationship or in the bedroom. So it doesn't surprise a lot that you seem to have the inherent belief that introverted, quiet girls can't be highly erotic too.
Of course a virgin isn't going to be a total freak at first if you don't show her the ropes. This new girl, on the other hand, you have to ask yourself where did she learn her bedroom skills (unless you could care less, I suppose, how many guys she's been with)? Not trying to bag on you - my guess is just that you're probably quite a bit younger and less experienced than I am, and that's fine.
And as you said, you're a natural introvert. So fair enough if you like being around people who polarize you. I can understand it.
I'd still caution on glorifying these extroverted party girls in your head too much. I see introverted guys get burnt a lot by these kinds of broads for the exact same reason you're hanging out with them. They somehow feel they need to make up for their introversion (
which is often they're greatest power), and make bad choices with women who they think will do that for them. But party girls will be party girls...
And even if you're telling yourself it's just a temporary thing, remember that the girls we tend to bang on a regular basis are often the girls we end up with eventually. Simple gravity.
So slippery sloping yourself into a relationship with a woman (whether this one or the next one) who's throwing out a dtf vibe to the whole room every time she goes out can lead you down various painful roads. If you have the presence to manage these girls and never get serious about them, by all means, have fun. But your descriptions of yourself don't really paint that picture, to be honest.
In any case, maybe you can take some of what you learn with her in bed and draw on those experiences later down the road. To create the sexual encounters that you want instead of letting the perceived sexual nature of whoever you're in bed with set the tone.
Just don't be fooled that you can't take what you learn from her and teach it to a woman who has more self-respect and poise in public. Because in a lot of cases you very well can.
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Its far more fun and easy with a girl who is a freak already, as you gain. What do you gain from the quiet girl?
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If I meet an introvert girl, I can play the extrovert - that will do it for her I'm sure and she loves it, but who is doing it for me>?
I think our general approach to women and life is very different. Why do you need
anyone to do anything for you?
You shouldn't need a woman to entertain you, teach you, or make your life more exciting. She's the lucky one for having the opportunity to step into your life and learn and have fun with you. Doesn't that sound like better foundation to stand on as a man?
And even if you're introverted, well, own it and bring her into your world instead of the other way around. Stop feeling like you need to change that about yourself, or especially like you need some socially sharp woman to draw you out.
Bottom line - I don't have to "play" intorvert or extrovert for anyone. I'm the life of the party because that's who I am, and well, when it's quiet time and I need some alone time or a bit of silence to read a book, I calmly but firmly let the girl know. Not like a dick, unless she refuses to honor the simple request, but just like a man who expects a certain level of respect. And in bed I take what I want, even if it means a drawn-out teaching process at first.
She doesn't need to "do it for me" because I don't need anything done for me. You craft the world that makes you happy - a woman steps into it on your terms or she hits the road.
Where a quiet girl can be a drag, I guess, is if she doesn't even have the social presence to have a normal conversation with other people when you're out with friends and family. But I find most quiet girls blossom and come into their own personality under the umbrella of a confident, socially present man.
As introverts, they will need more time away from the crowd to regenerate, but it's not like they're hopeless socially unless they are really extreme. They just feel put off by shallow interactions with people who aren't really in their circle of trust yet.
None of this, though, determines what they can be capable of in the sack.