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Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?
#1

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

I’m looking to move to a bigger city within the United States to live out my 30s. Right now I live in a Midwest city with a metro area of a little less than 1 million and I want out as I’ve lived here 90% of my life. The best indicators for a city I want to live in is reasonable COL, a good place to game white women in their 20s through out my 30s, and active nightlife.
I’m 28.5 now and I plan on moving in the summer when I turn 29. I’ll have about 15k saved up and an additional 10k (as of right now, who knows what it will be then) in crypto. I have a degree in economics I have done nothing with and currently working a entry level IT job that pays 40k a year. This is why it is important for me to find a city with a decent cost of living and why Im not looking at cities such as in California or even Chicago. I want to be able to go on a few drink dates a week and enjoy nightlife Thurs - Sat without pinching too hard. Ill probably start at the city with a 40k job and hopefully within a couple years something more. I have student loan debt which will be a few hundred a month but no car payments.
I also want a city that has some anonymity, after gaming in my home city for 4 years I have ran into some issues as there aren't enough targets, Im banned from one of the most popular venues. I know how to better remain anonymous while running game through rotating venues, not showing attitude if you are given attitude (this is how I got banned), I have become more aware. I feel a city with a metro of 3-4 million would allow me this. These are the cities I am considering moving to Minneapolis, Tampa, Kansas City, and Nashville/Charleston. I live in Las Vegas for a few months a few years ago and didn't enjoy it too much.

I feel like Minneapolis would be perfect for me, except the weather sucks. Everything else I like about it, from the white women, to cost of living, to the fact its only 5-6 hr drive from home. Im just not sure how I feel about that cold, I imagine id adapt but it would suck.

The other city that intrigues me is Tampa, the cost of living is good and its about 3 million metro plus the weather is bomb, I’ve heard the nightlife is just average though but I think being able to game on a beach year round would be nice since Im in good shape and could do well with younger women into my late 30s there on the beach.

Kansas city is the largest metro area near me right now but it feels like a larger version of my hometown and isn't as large as Id like.

Nashville/Charleston seem alright but they are smaller than Id like, I don’t know a whole bunch about them. I feel Chicago would be too expensive to be comfortable on 40k. I looked into Denver but I’ve heard its not the best for game and if I move there I might as well move to Chicago since the cost of living is about the same.

What do you all think or does anyone have further suggestions? I’m willing to listen to any ideas.
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#2

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

I'd strongly recommend one of the bigger cities like Chicago, Miami, Nashville. The reason being that you'll get a lot of women also not from there, and no one will question why you moved there. Nightlife in major cities is simply better also. For game and otherwise.

I've lived in LA all my life and the nightlife is top of the line but most of it inaccessible unless you know the right people / have the money. Something to aspire to is good though. So I'd say keep your options open but narrow the list to the major cities. I just don't think it's worth it to move to a place like Minneapolis, where I was recently, for game. Weather sucks and game didn't seem very good in a smaller place like that.
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#3

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

I'm mid-30's and since I turned 30 years old have been exclusively gaming in NYC and Miami.

I tried game in San Francisco, Chicago and Denver as a over 30's guy and it didn't have the same results as NYC and Miami.

Quote:Quote:

I looked into Denver but I’ve heard its not the best for game and if I move there I might as well move to Chicago since the cost of living is about the same.

I recently visited a friend in Denver and he said the cost of living is skyrocketing. And its not a good place to game.
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#4

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Generally speaking, bigger cities will be much better for an established guy in his 30s. No shortage of women that take care of themselves well into adulthood, plenty of single gals to go around of all ages, lots of diversity etc. Basically you can't go wrong - whatever your type, you'll find it.

I'd pick NYC as my #1 choice. LA is alright but nowhere near as good, same for SF unless you're in the right tech circles. Can't speak for Chicago/Miami etc. as I've never been.

The only downside to big cities such as the aforementioned ones is that competition for top tier women is extremely stiff. It's not enough to just have a decent six figure job as a doctor/attorney etc as these cities are filled with well off guys (not to mention the women themselves earn well and/or come from wealthy families). So you'll have to bring it in more than just the finances area - looks, personality etc everything will need to be on point, unlike in some small cities where just having a good job might suffice to set you apart from the crowd.

TL;DR - you can play the numbers game endlessly in big cities, and since success with women is largely a numbers game, these places win.

Good luck.

Pussy ain't for pussies...
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#5

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

I suggest listening to Aaron Clarey's podcasts about Minneapolis. For that matter, you should check out his Asshole Consulting service.
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#6

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

I would try to make Chicago work. Even if you are only making $40k a year now, you can basically start small and minimalist (live near the city center) and there are way more opportunities. Tons of girls/nightlife, I would have absolutely loved to live there in my late 20s/early 30s.

I thought it was a fairly inexpensive city and there are enough free activities to keep you busy. You won't need a car either, which is a huge plus.
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#7

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Nothing in the US compares to NYC with respect to the sheer quantity of women and ease of getting them in the sack. Not to mention diversity -- no matter what kind of guy you are or angle that you play, there is a receptive audience for you in nyc. I would also say that early 30s could possibly be the ideal age for a man here.

on the downside, the rent and constant drinking will do a number on your finances and make it virtually impossible for you to save anything if youre anticipating a bankroll of 60k or lower. But while you're still relatively young I would say you owe it to yourself to at least spend a year or two here.
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#8

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Before you decide on a city, why do you feel you will only make $40K/year? With $15K liquid assets and I assume no debt, you can live modest in any of the cities mentioned. I have a friend who moved to Chicago after living in Delaware his entire life and loves it there. He moved with about $25K student loan debt, a 10 year old beater, and a job making $35K/yr. He now makes about $75K, still has that same beater, and has 2-3 MILF plates he enjoys that he met all during night game.
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#9

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Is the 40000 a year after taxes, healthcare and 401k. I make almost 50000 at my day job but my take home pay is 31000. I’m in the same boat I’ve lived in Alaska and Charlotte only and looking move to a place good for day game. With my job I can transfer any place I want as well.
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#10

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

I am in a similar situation, but with some different circumstances. I'm mid-30s, ~200k as a location independent software engineer. I don't drink (I'm on year 2 of the TLOZ wagon). Chicago would crush me with their ridiculous taxes. I lived in Austin for 10+ years and that was great city to spend my 20s, but now I'm over it. Also the culture there heavily involves drinking. I already did a year as a digital nomad. It was great, but would like to stay in the US/Canada for now. I've been looking at Las Vegas or Scottsdale for larger cities. I'm an avid snowboarder, so I was also looking at smaller mountain towns. In my experience these have tons of men though and no women. For smaller towns I was looking at Flagstaff AZ, Jackson Hole WY, Laramie WY, Spokane WA, Vancouver WA (Portland area, but with Washington Taxes). I was also thinking about Salt Lake City or Boise, but these areas have surprisingly high taxes for supposedly conservative states. Lowest taxes seem to be WY then NV nationwide. I'm using this site to compare.

https://smartasset.com/taxes/income-taxes#rsnCKGgrtb
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#11

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

I enjoy living in Boulder. It’s a great place for a man in his 30s.
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#12

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Quote: (01-03-2019 03:00 AM)AWright Wrote:  

Kansas city is the largest metro area near me right now but it feels like a larger version of my hometown and isn't as large as Id like.

Are you in Nebraska by any chance ?

I want to move to Minneapolis, Chicago and then NYC, but I'm having a hard time finding available housing.
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#13

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Since NYC is out of the question I would say save up $ and invest it or do what you need to in order to afford Chicago.
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#14

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

$40k is going to be pretty rough no matter where you go but you're still young so it's acceptable.

If you can pull off that income in Miami it might be worth it, get roommates in a cool spot in Brickell, cook and keep your nightlife expenses low. Miami nightlife tends to run on the high side but you also have the beach to walk around and enjoy for free.

Scottsdale is probably the best for that income, you can pay $1k-1300 monthly for a big one bedroom in a decent apartment complex with a pool. Drinks are cheap, pool parties, rock climbing are cheap activities as well. Women are beautiful but as always it's tougher to get 8+ without social circle, money, or status. You can keep a decent car for a few hundred a month, maybe a motorcycle too.

You should also evaluate your career, 40k IT role sounds like IT support and you should figure out how to get to a bracket of 70-100k which is more normal in IT and your options will option up immensely. That should be a huge evaluation on the next city you live in.
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#15

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Quote: (01-03-2019 06:44 PM)lunchmoney Wrote:  

Before you decide on a city, why do you feel you will only make $40K/year? With $15K liquid assets and I assume no debt, you can live modest in any of the cities mentioned. I have a friend who moved to Chicago after living in Delaware his entire life and loves it there. He moved with about $25K student loan debt, a 10 year old beater, and a job making $35K/yr. He now makes about $75K, still has that same beater, and has 2-3 MILF plates he enjoys that he met all during night game.

I make about 40k per year now where I'm at, I suppose I could find another job with making a little more money but I also don't want to overshoot myself, I'd rather be cautious than optimistic. I do have some significant student loan debt which I plan on paying the income based so it will be about 300 per month.



Quote: (01-03-2019 08:07 PM)velkrum Wrote:  

Quote: (01-03-2019 03:00 AM)AWright Wrote:  

Kansas city is the largest metro area near me right now but it feels like a larger version of my hometown and isn't as large as Id like.

Are you in Nebraska by any chance ?

I want to move to Minneapolis, Chicago and then NYC, but I'm having a hard time finding available housing.

That is correct I'm in Omaha.

Quote: (01-03-2019 08:30 PM)Shimmy Wrote:  

Since NYC is out of the question I would say save up $ and invest it or do what you need to in order to afford Chicago.

That is my plan now and I'm seriously looking at Chicago. I'm investing about 500 per month into crypto and saving about 500. I've been investing into crypto for the past 8 months and am actually up 15% in this bear market thanks to Chainlink which is 80% of my portfolio. Anyone reading this thread look into chainlink, it's the best performing coin over the past 6 months for a reason.

Quote: (01-04-2019 02:31 AM)Graft Wrote:  

$40k is going to be pretty rough no matter where you go but you're still young so it's acceptable.

If you can pull off that income in Miami it might be worth it, get roommates in a cool spot in Brickell, cook and keep your nightlife expenses low. Miami nightlife tends to run on the high side but you also have the beach to walk around and enjoy for free.

Scottsdale is probably the best for that income, you can pay $1k-1300 monthly for a big one bedroom in a decent apartment complex with a pool. Drinks are cheap, pool parties, rock climbing are cheap activities as well. Women are beautiful but as always it's tougher to get 8+ without social circle, money, or status. You can keep a decent car for a few hundred a month, maybe a motorcycle too.

You should also evaluate your career, 40k IT role sounds like IT support and you should figure out how to get to a bracket of 70-100k which is more normal in IT and your options will option up immensely. That should be a huge evaluation on the next city you live in.

I'm going to look into Phoenix/Scottsdale but right now I'm leaning towards Chicago as it's in the Midwest and the cost of living isn't as much as I thought. Chicago has everything I'm looking for game wise with the anonymity, numerous white women, ability to game any night, good nightlife, and go at it online hard. I'll just save up a few extra grand before I move. I refuse to get roommate so NYC is out the question. I work technical support right now and I don't even know I want to make IT a career I just took the job because I wasn't having much luck finding another job with my degree that paid more than 15 per hour.
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#16

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned New Orleans. It's regarded as Vegas on a budget. Yes, there's temptation there but if you want anonymity, you can have it if you do it right. Rent is a solid deal over there by US standards. If you have discipline on spending, you can definitely live there on a 40K annual salary. Lots of tourist girls coming in and out of that city, a lot in bachelorette parties. Plus, you have the local girls if you want that, but I'd be a little more careful going that route. As a bonus, it may be one of the last US cities with any type of culture.

As far back as I could remember, I always wanted to be a player.

2018 New Orleans Datasheet
New Jersey State Datasheet
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#17

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Quote: (01-04-2019 04:13 AM)yankeetravels Wrote:  

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned New Orleans. It's regarded as Vegas on a budget. Yes, there's temptation there but if you want anonymity, you can have it if you do it right. Rent is a solid deal over there by US standards. If you have discipline on spending, you can definitely live there on a 40K annual salary. Lots of tourist girls coming in and out of that city, a lot in bachelorette parties. Plus, you have the local girls if you want that, but I'd be a little more careful going that route. As a bonus, it may be one of the last US cities with any type of culture.

I was going to mention NOLA, but I can't imagine living there to be honest. I think the southern culture will get to you eventually and the french quarter will get tired. Kind of like how people in Vegas never go to the strip when they actually live there, I think NOLA will be kind of the same.
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#18

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Quote: (01-04-2019 03:21 AM)AWright Wrote:  

I'm going to look into Phoenix/Scottsdale but right now I'm leaning towards Chicago as it's in the Midwest and the cost of living isn't as much as I thought. Chicago has everything I'm looking for game wise with the anonymity, numerous white women, ability to game any night, good nightlife, and go at it online hard. I'll just save up a few extra grand before I move. I refuse to get roommate so NYC is out the question. I work technical support right now and I don't even know I want to make IT a career I just took the job because I wasn't having much luck finding another job with my degree that paid more than 15 per hour.

Just stay away from anything outside of the city in Chicago. The apartments may look nice and more affordable for what you get, but its boring as fuck out there (even like 15 minutes outside the city). Stay somewhere in the city and you'll have an awesome time.
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#19

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

I'd say Miami, Chi or Phoenix. Low Cost of living and great nightlife
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#20

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Now there are just too many red flags for this thread for me to rightfully propose a city to you OP, I think there are a host of other things that need some work before you can pick the city.

1. What have you been doing throughout your 20s to be working an entry level IT job?

I hate to point out the elephant in the room but a lot of this work can be outsourced and you have not put yourself in the best footing financially. While I am all for guys going all out and gaming the kinds of women that they want, you have to cover certain aspects of your life and get those fixed before you start dreaming of the big city life. I can tell you that some cities like NYC won't be doable for you as most men your age will be way ahead financially and in a better position as well.

I've heard a lot of criticism for this but you should consider amping up the amount of hours you work each week so you are making more money. You have the energy in your 20s and maybe even your early 30s to still work long hours and hustle hard. My suggestion would be to have your IT job and do another job for the weekend, perhaps at a bar or nightclub, to bring in more money and even meet more of the people you want.

Get your career situation finalized and fixed first, then worry about the best city. You should be hustling hard now because the clock is ticking. Hope should not be your approach, your approach should be strategy, in other words get your shit together.

2. How are you getting banned from venues?

In all of my time going out, guys who were banned from venues were the ones who were stirring up trouble, still bothering girls after they had repeatedly told them they want to be left alone and doing some seriously sketchy shit. I am not saying you are doing any of this OP but if you are getting banned from venues, that is another red flag right there. You might need to take some time to reflect what is going on because if you are running aggressive game like a refugee in Europe chasing after white women, it is time to take a step back and refine some things.

The reason I am concerned about this is if it happens on a large enough scale to where men with that kind of an approach move en-masse to cities that are normally good for game, those cities will start to suck. You will have the same situation as with PUAs in Canada getting banned from malls and refugees in Europe groping girls. Now you might not be doing any of this OP but getting banned from a popular venue is a huge red flag.

I hope you don't take any of this personally, here is my suggestion for you OP.

From what I read of this thread, you have spent most of your 20s trying to figure out your career situation and going out on nights approaching aggressively to where it has you banned from venues. For me to blindly tell you to go to NYC would be irresponsible on my part and not looking out for your best interests. What has happened is that you put your career on the back burner, floated throughout your 20s and are now hoping and dreaming of things to get better.

What you need to do in these next couple years is to look inward and have a distinct plan, prioritize what really matters. Not sure where you are with your IT career but it is time to start planning and stop hoping.

The city you decide on needs to offer you the best prospects for advancing your career, pick the company best for you and your growth, and put that before pussy.
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#21

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Just saw this great thread by PolymathGuru and also ordered Aaron Clary's book on the topic.

thread-65433.html
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#22

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

There is no doubt I messed up career wise and money wise in my 20s, I moved to Colombia for a few months at 24 and went broke, than moved to Vegas for a few months and went broke while trying to find a career job that I wasn't able to find. I tried looking for career jobs with my economics degree when I got back home but did not have luck so I took a technical support job I've been at for 2.5 years.
As for getting banned, it's not a big city it's that simple. I'll quote rooshv from an article about gaming in midwest small towns/small cities, he was actually referring to my city. "Now I know why I’m not a big hit among men in the Midwest: my cold approach game would get you quickly marked in your town and ostracized." https://www.rooshv.com/10-things-i-learn...an-midwest
I'm a white guy who approaches women in a small city, is this era of me too, that can easily get you marked by a venue if one woman doesn't like the fact you are gaming her friends and not her and complains. I dont think it's a big deal or "elephant in a room" at all, it's also one venue, not venues, the venue is known for having strict policies.
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#23

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Quote: (01-04-2019 03:26 PM)AWright Wrote:  

There is no doubt I messed up career wise and money wise in my 20s, I moved to Colombia for a few months at 24 and went broke, than moved to Vegas for a few months and went broke while trying to find a career job that I wasn't able to find. I tried looking for career jobs with my economics degree when I got back home but did not have luck so I took a technical support job I've been at for 2.5 years.
As for getting banned, it's not a big city it's that simple. I'll quote rooshv from an article about gaming in midwest small towns/small cities, he was actually referring to my city. "Now I know why I’m not a big hit among men in the Midwest: my cold approach game would get you quickly marked in your town and ostracized." https://www.rooshv.com/10-things-i-learn...an-midwest
I'm a white guy who approaches women in a small city, is this era of me too, that can easily get you marked by a venue if one woman doesn't like the fact you are gaming her friends and not her and complains. I dont think it's a big deal or "elephant in a room" at all, it's also one venue, not venues, the venue is known for having strict policies.

Let's not play the white guy victim card here, if you got banned from a venue, it is definitely worth looking into and reflecting on.

In my honest opinion, you should not be practicing PUA-style game in small cities. I hope you were not doing what some wacko PUAs on youtube videos do but here are some things I recommend:

1. Connect with the alumni group for your college on social media, its time to get looped in and not constantly walk around like an outsider. You may as well come across some great career opportunities.

2. Join a group in something you are passionate about, perhaps a local church group if you are a bit religious.

3. Focus more on your career advancement, see where your skills are at and go for a career there.

4. Attitude, accept the responsibility for whatever has happened. Life happened, you made mistakes like everyone who is human does, now it is time to look forward and see what can be done to make the most of what you have.
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#24

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

I wasn't trying to play a white guy victim, but I'm certainly not some African refugee groping white women, that what I was trying to say. I certainly know not to give attitude when a woman gives you attitude now though while gaming here, better to just keep a tight lip, that's what I learned. I agree about the career, I'm learning excel and SQL off of udemy right now to make me more employable.
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#25

Which city in the United States should I move to for my 30s?

Quote: (01-04-2019 03:21 AM)AWright Wrote:  

Quote: (01-03-2019 08:07 PM)velkrum Wrote:  

Are you in Nebraska by any chance ?

That is correct I'm in Omaha.
Your pretty close, I'm in Lincoln !
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