[Bigalo]

Hey guys,

Actually just about 8 motnhs ago I was doing very well on Tinder, then stopped using it, and recently I just tested and changed my location (with tinder plus) to London / LA, I noticed a sharp decrease in matches and quality. I don't know, maybe my profile is just outdated or not cool enough in today's standrads, or I'm just not good looking enough and the competition is too fierce. Or maybe it's the algoritm.. I have no idea.

(btw on okc I still do well but okc is dying)

But the thing is that I just hate all the stuff about taking new pics and test them, I feel like I'm beoming a slave to this. I'll take some good new pics, and then in a few years I'll fall behind because I still haven't even built an instagram account.

This post is not about debunking tinder, not at all. I was just wondering if there are guys here who feel they're in a similar situation and how they deal with it.

Do you just become master in daygame? Create situations to meet girls irl?
I read about SMV, I know that it's important. I'm just looking for someone inspirational. The famous guys on daygame are biased because they obviously try to sell something.

Can you really enjoy the hookup culture without online dating, or a minimal use of online dating?

Thanks a lot!

[2negative]

As far as I’m concerned Tinder’s been dead for a while. It was great at first, as I found numerous casual sex partners as well as girlfriends. Now I just get matched with fat Wakandans and girls who give their Venmo name in their profile.

[lonewolf1992]

I can only tell you that I was addicted to using Tinder and another dating app here and all I've got was poor quality, daily grinding, and stress. After 1 month of uninstalling those two goddamned apps I've gone out, had some girls flirt and hit on me, and overall feel a ton better partly because I feel like a man who has more important stuff to do than swipe on a fucking phone all day. My game is not tight yet, but at least I feel like I'm on the right track.

However, if you don't have means to meet girls on a daily basis like I do in my workplace, I think is a good idea to have online game as a 'supplement' (I heard that from another fellow forum member). But man, roosh says that, don't bother with tinder and play it in hard mode, the rewards are sweeter but the work is harder.

[pancakemouse]

(11-25-2018 08:09 PM)Bigalo Wrote:  

Can you really enjoy the hookup culture without online dating, or a minimal use of online dating?

Yes. Nightgame and/or social circle.

[Batman_]

Using Tinder/dating apps can become barriers that prevent you from really pushing yourself. Using them exclusively without doing cold approach is a bad idea.

Personally, I got laid a lot more from the Tinder than I did from cold approach, but I agree with lonewolf1992, the quality of girls was very poor for the most part. I sometimes even experienced post-sex regret/agitation with many of the girls I fucked. I often didn't feel like the girl was even worth having sex with and didn't enjoy my time with them. Who knows, maybe I wasn't screening hard enough.

All the experiences I had with the apps did help me learn how to handle things like logistics, text game, LMR, etc, but it was otherwise a pretty underwhelming and annoying series of experiences overall.

Cold approach should take priority over any dating apps.

[the-dream]

My experience with Tinder and cryptocurrency was quite similar. It all seems too easy at first and like you've found the cheat codes to life, then it all comes crashing down and you realise that you never even had the basics covered.

[Delta]

^Another analogy is online poker, which was chock full of dumbasses who were easy pickings when it first became a thing, but now everyone who's still doing it knows how to play, and there's no more easy money to be had.

It's clear to me too that the "easy money" period for online dating too is long gone. It used to be that every now and then, a girl would get super excited that I was contacting her. A fit, successful man who could hold a normal conversation without being a thirsty chode, on a dating site, was a novelty to these chicks. I've had my share of dates where the girl was so enthusiastic about meeting me, all I needed was "don't fuck up" game. That shit never happens anymore. I get no shortage of matches, and at any given time I'm going back and forth with a handful of prospects, but they're all so conversationally lazy and apathetic it drives me insane. All these girls with hot shot advanced degrees suddenly have the conversational prowess of a special needs 6 year old when on a dating app. This tells me they have enough viable options now to take them completely for granted.

And even when I do get a girl out on a date and execute well (create a warm giddy vibe, holding hands, kissing, etc.), it's much more of a crapshoot than it used to be. I actually never get 'ghosted' anymore; rejection now comes in the form of the girl always claiming to be busy, but giving me just enough encouragement to string me along as an option. It feels like the behavior of someone who has a ton of solid options and wants to explore them all, while retaining me as a backup plan. A good date used to create excitement, not this calculating playing of the field.

Online dating used to mainly consist of loser guys with shit game. Now, all signs point to top-notch guys having gotten in on the party, and general awareness of how to properly execute online game being way up. Nothing can impress these chicks anymore. Not your chiseled body, not your amazing job, not your handsome face, not your witty lines, not your awesome travel pics, nothing. They've seen it all a zillion times. Unfortunately the quality of girls hasn't increased like the quality of guys, because girls were never really the ones who had to try. Necessity is the mother of innovation, and the necessity has always been entirely on our side of the market.

[BadBoyGamer]

Quote:

Do you just become master in daygame? Create situations to meet girls irl?

You spend too much time online. Soon you will be humping your smartphone and thinking it be the same as real life sex.

At some point you be going to have to meet a girl in real life. Even if you used Tinder to arrange a date. If you ever want to put your little shamestick into her heavenly temple you need to get real close to her. No smartphone be helping you do this.

Quote:

I read about SMV, I know that it's important. I'm just looking for someone inspirational. The famous guys on daygame are biased because they obviously try to sell something.

Ofcourse they are selling something. Does not mean they be selling air in a box.

Game has been proven to work.

Quote:

Can you really enjoy the hookup culture without online dating, or a minimal use of online dating?

Yes, go outside. Leave your smartphone inside.

[Kieran]

I saw an article on the most swiped 30 people for the UK the other day. They were nothing special and I wouldn't even consider them as competition in a bar. The women were a joke as well.

[Winston Wolfe]

(11-25-2018 08:09 PM)Bigalo Wrote:  

But the thing is that I just hate all the stuff about taking new pics and test them, I feel like I'm beoming a slave to this. I'll take some good new pics, and then in a few years I'll fall behind because I still haven't even built an instagram account.

This is a sign that you need to take a step back.

I was in the same boat for a while. Relying too much on Tinder and spending way too much time swiping and getting frustrated with the whole shit.

Remember, the only reason these apps are succesful is because thirsty men give validation to the girls who use them. Not the other way around. You are automatically giving up a bit of frame merely by being on there, because these apps hand the frame to the girl by design.

Now, I am not saying to not use dating apps, because yes, they are an easy way to get laid. Just don't make it your primary means (or, god forbid, only means) of meeting girls.

Make sure about 2/3rd or more of your lays comes from cold approach (whether it be night game or day game) and treat Tinder as a nice supplement that doesn't require much effort (i.e. don't become a slave to it, as you described it).

To get back to your question, "can you really make it without Tinder", yes absolutely. Men got laid before Tinder, before dating sites, before smartphones and before the internet. And men still get laid in 2018 without relying on any of that.

[pancakemouse]

(11-26-2018 05:30 AM)Kieran Wrote:  

I saw an article on the most swiped 30 people for the UK the other day. They were nothing special and I wouldn't even consider them as competition in a bar. The women were a joke as well.

That's because that article was clickbait bullshit.

[Bigalo]

Hey guys thanks a lot for your input!
This is really encouraging
Now I do realize I was counting solely on Tinder and it fucked with my mind

Gonna go outside and abandon online as much as I can..

Just one more question: do you happen to have an inspirational role model in daygame, someone who consistently gets good results?

I just know about Tom Torero who seems cool

Thanks again!

[BadBoyGamer]

(11-26-2018 08:48 PM)Bigalo Wrote:  

Just one more question: do you happen to have an inspirational role model in daygame, someone who consistently gets good results?

I just know about Tom Torero who seems cool

Tom Torero has a free e-book on website and some good videos. He follows the London Dagame Model. That is good and easy way to get started. After perhaps 500 approaches go take a look at Krauser (krauserpua.com). His material is pretty advanced and not for beginners.

[The Golden God]

I have a tinder I'll go on every few days to swipe until I'm out of swipes and that is about all I do with it, I send really low investment messages and the girls that bite are all highly interested.

I don't care about my success on there that much because tinder is a (((plan))) to have all men paying for the possibility of sex with SIFs. I firmly believe that their algorithms increase success (like the initial account boost) to get men hooked on the app, followed by a drought where your profile gets sent to the bottom of the stack so that tinder can push you into buying a membership.

Look at it this way - when you're sitting there swiping on tinder you could be sitting at a coffee shop around attractive women.

For every hundred swipes or so you could get 2-25 matches (I'm not a tinder expert so don't take these as concrete numbers).

Out of those matches, maybe 33% reply to your initial message and the ones that do will require fast responses and good text game to pull their attention away from the dozens of other messages being sent her way.

While at a coffee shop you could see a girl with strong IOIs, approach her with an easy indirect opener, ramble for a couple minutes and ask her out. If you're on top of your game and she's available you can almost certainly get her out on a date, and then it is all up to you where it goes.

Not up to the algorithms.

Not up to how many guys are in her messages.

Just good old fashioned game.

I know what I prefer.

[Leonide]

I use to bang girls met on tinder... and I do enjoy this. It's quite easy, and this why i like it : we have more time for what is very important : sex !

[Bigalo]

Thanks guys

btw, not that it matters since I decided to stop using Tinder, but it's for sure the algoritm since when I changed the location back to my country I suddenly got loads of matches.

This stupid algoritm is another reason not to use it I guess(:

[Jaygg]

Every guy should use Tinder occasionally to get easy lays. It’s not that hard. We live in the technological world. Can’t escape it and it’s only going to get more like this so adapt or die. Use tinder everyday.

[LexisNexis]

In my opinion, no. What exactly do I mean by that? The only guys who I know do well at real life game (nightgame) are already good looking enough to get reliable results on Tinder. While guys I know who are forced to do nightgame because they fail online, end up failing at nightgame too. No middle path it seems. So your 'Tinder value' speaks well to a sort of overall value.

[MaceTyrell]

It all comes down to notch expectations.

If you’re fine with getting <10 matches a year, then by all means abandon Tinder.

Otherwise gotta keep to it.