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Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1
#1

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

I've been lurking on this forum for a bit and I have to say that this is the only pickup-related forum that's worth its salt. I'm going to drop a bit of knowledge for the young guys on the forum. This is pretty much me saying what I would say to my younger self.

A bit of background, I started picking up girls 8 years ago when I was 19 years old (I'm now 26 years old). I was literally the pick-up guy who was out every night trying to pick up girls’ day in and day out. I had a lot of success but I also had a lot of failures obviously.

I'm well over 150+ girls at this point (I stopped counting 3 years in at 40 kills). I've always been consistent when it came to getting girls but honestly, it’s whatever to me. I was teaching pick up for a while but stopped it because I honestly wasn’t in to taking guys out every weekend to clubs to teach pick up. It just wasn’t appealing to me.

Now, I’m career focused working at an IT company and working on my side projects. Past couple of years I’ve learned a lot about life and game and want to share it with some of you guys here. I’m not sure if everyone will find value in it but I’m hoping to reach at least one person to help them change their life around. I’m going to list some truths/lessons I've learned along the way. I'm hoping to help wake some of you guys up to start killing it at life.

Disclaimer: I'm dyslexic so excuse the grammar mistakes.

1. Focusing all your energy on women will destroy you.

I've done everything from 30-day challenges to immersions. These don't make you good or happy, they burn you out. Immersing yourself around women all the time will ultimately make you hate them. You’ll start seeing, and experiencing too much of what they are to the point where your heart will become black. Women aren’t good nor evil, they’re women. Being too immersed will make you hate them and being too distant will make you crave them. You need to be in the pocket. You want to like them but not need them if that makes sense. If you go to any of the extremes, you’re going to destroy yourself.

2. Living with your parents kills your value, identity, and results

There's nothing more repulsive than a boy that's dependent on his parents. If you're living with your parents you aren't a man. Simple. You kill your social value because you’re dependent. It’s weak and pathetic. Girls who accept this from men aren’t usually high quality anyways. If you’re 18+ and still living at home, you’re losing at life. If you are doing it to save money, you’re basically a leech. Plain and simple. Move out and rely on your own resources.

There’s something you get from being completely independent that money can’t buy. It’s pride and responsibility. It changes your swag, mindset, and identity. It’s a natural passage as a man. I don’t care if you’re living with roommates (for now), just move out of your parents. Get away from mommy and daddy. Plus, you also want to live alone to have girls over for obvious reasons. Nothing more awkward than knowing your mom is overhearing you throw some poor girl’s back out. It’s not fun, I've experienced it.

3. Don't ever compromise your identity for any woman

This isn't even to get more girls. It's for your own sanity and well-being. Nothing is worse than looking yourself in the mirror and knowing you'll do anything to get laid. Read that last sentence over, doesn’t make you cringe? Exactly. Do not comprise yourself for women. You play it your way or not at all. Anytime a girl knows you’ll bend, you’re fucked. You’re absolutely fucked. I have hundreds of references to support this. Never let a woman run the show because once you do, the show is over.

It’s like being a seasoned pilot and having a random passenger fly the plane.
Women don’t know what they want. They demand things and want things just for the sake of it. A lot of the time, it’s just a stupid shit-test just to see if you’ll jump. A good rule of thumb, if you think it’s a shit-test, ignore it, laugh it off or change subjects. Simple. If what she’s asking or suggesting something you feel uncomfortable with, do not do it. It’s the man inside you speaking to you. Don’t ignore it. Listen to it and act accordingly. Listen to your gut when this happens.

4. Pick up isn’t a winning game.


If you choose not to listen to me, you’ll only find depression, despair and hatred (for yourself and women). Your identity will be based on your sexual prowess and not your merits. It’s a game will you will not win.

Just like boxing, you don’t want boxing to retire you, you want to retire from boxing. You want to be the Floyd Mayweathers, living lavishly and with health intact, not the Muhammad Alis forced to retire, broke and physically shoot (RIP). There are some guys out there that will always be chancing the next big thing and will never know when to quit. There’s a point where you gotta know when to hang it up. This isn't saying stop talking to girls or stop getting laid but stop searching for next big thing.

If you find a girl you like, keep her around. Don’t blow it down the drain because there’s a coked up “10” that’s willing to throw some pussy at you because she’s horny. Settle down on your terms and play by your rules.

Be prepared to hang it up when the show is over and don’t look back. You had fun, you put on a show and now, it’s time to go home. Be thankful for the experience but don’t live in regret. Be happy you got the opportunity to have fun and fuck a few hot girls along the way. You don’t want to be past your prime, alone and run down because you let pick up retire you. Just understand there is an end to this game and you need to understand that it will come. Not a lot of guys understand this, remember this.
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#2

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Is getting married and settling down with a fat slut who will divorce you and take half of your shit the end game?
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#3

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Its weird how we go from thinking the 30s and on are a man's prime, a man's value goes up with age as a woman's goes down and all of that to this. I see where you come from OP but I am perplexed by this shift in mindset not just with your post but even this forum. Now we're about finding fulfillment, spirituality and all of this feel good stuff I see to be nonsense while we started off trying to be alpha and get with as many hot girls as possible.

As for compromising your values for a woman, your values change as you learn game and see more of the world. The thoughts you had about her being the one and women being Disney princesses changes once you finally get out there. You change your thoughts about the world as you get more life experience and realize that regurgitating history books isn't going to win you respect, a successful life is.

Your identity should change as you go on this journey because you decided to go on this journey after realizing just how fucked your life was.

I agree with many parts of your post OP but it troubles me that this whole settle down and become laid back mentality towards game has taken hold after telling men that their 30s are their prime. Its like I can't blame young men out there for questioning advice even from some game experts.

First they tell you that your 30s are your prime and then they shame you for wanting to sleep around, its like why not just be transparent and say shit goes downhill after 25?

I went way off the rails with the post OP and I know you were well meaning. While I agree with you that you should not throw away your whole life just to cold approach, I do think that some men are not meant for marriage and kids and they need to spend their whole lives jumping from woman to woman.
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#4

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

I've said this before - but, pickup is a tool or a skill, not a lifestyle.

Specifically, it's a tool/skill mainly for guys that don't have social circles or other avenues to tap into girls. It can also be an additional avenue to tap into girls if you already have those areas covered. (pickup does also have ancillary benefits like improving social skills, creativity, confidence and other areas)

All most guys really need to be able to do with that skill, is to be able to walk up to a girl and talk to her in a calibrated way - and to be able to know how to escalate to get a number/date/sex or relationship if need be. That's it. That will get you 95% of the way to getting what you want. Marketing from pickup companies who want to make money has distorted that and confused guys

Once you are at that point, if you keep putting more time into it, you reach diminishing returns and you also face the opportunity cost that all this time you are putting into pickup you could be putting time into other skills and facets of your life that are going to support you and help your grow in a lot more of a rounded way as you get older.

Like everything in life - have a balance and use the tool in a way that suits you. You might use it more heavily at different points of your life more intensely than other points.

But, overall, if you want to get the most out of life, you certainly don't want to be in your mid to late 30's or older, and only have pickup as your only skill or the definition of your life

Build up the other areas of your life such as career, money, health, social etc. - it's simple logic where it gives you more strings to your bow and more flexibility going forward

Use pickup and cold approach in a way that gives you maximum returns in terms of happiness, sex and relationships - don't let it use you and eat you up
Reply
#5

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-15-2018 09:48 PM)bruce_almighty Wrote:  

Is getting married and settling down with a fat slut who will divorce you and take half of your shit the end game?

This is exactly what I mean when I guy goes to the extreme of being too immersed in pickup. You start to hate women. Brother, you're extremely angry, not just at women but yourself. The fact, out of everything I just wrote, this obvious angered you the most.

Ask yourself why.
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#6

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-15-2018 10:03 PM)a beer is enough Wrote:  

Its weird how we go from thinking the 30s and on are a man's prime, a man's value goes up with age as a woman's goes down and all of that to this. I see where you come from OP but I am perplexed by this shift in mindset not just with your post but even this forum. Now we're about finding fulfillment, spirituality and all of this feel good stuff I see to be nonsense while we started off trying to be alpha and get with as many hot girls as possible.

As for compromising your values for a woman, your values change as you learn game and see more of the world. The thoughts you had about her being the one and women being Disney princesses changes once you finally get out there. You change your thoughts about the world as you get more life experience and realize that regurgitating history books isn't going to win you respect, a successful life is.

Your identity should change as you go on this journey because you decided to go on this journey after realizing just how fucked your life was.

I agree with many parts of your post OP but it troubles me that this whole settle down and become laid back mentality towards game has taken hold after telling men that their 30s are their prime. Its like I can't blame young men out there for questioning advice even from some game experts.

First they tell you that your 30s are your prime and then they shame you for wanting to sleep around, its like why not just be transparent and say shit goes downhill after 25?

I went way off the rails with the post OP and I know you were well meaning. While I agree with you that you should not throw away your whole life just to cold approach, I do think that some men are not meant for marriage and kids and they need to spend their whole lives jumping from woman to woman.

Appreciate it but more than have of the stuff you're talking doesn't even apply to the post. Honestly confused where you got half of this form my post?
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#7

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-15-2018 11:08 PM)GT777733 Wrote:  

I've said this before - but, pickup is a tool or a skill, not a lifestyle.

Specifically, it's a tool/skill mainly for guys that don't have social circles or other avenues to tap into girls. It can also be an additional avenue to tap into girls if you already have those areas covered. (pickup does also have ancillary benefits like improving social skills, creativity, confidence and other areas)

All most guys really need to be able to do with that skill, is to be able to walk up to a girl and talk to her in a calibrated way - and to be able to know how to escalate to get a number/date/sex or relationship if need be. That's it. That will get you 95% of the way to getting what you want. Marketing from pickup companies who want to make money has distorted that and confused guys

Once you are at that point, if you keep putting more time into it, you reach diminishing returns and you also face the opportunity cost that all this time you are putting into pickup you could be putting time into other skills and facets of your life that are going to support you and help your grow in a lot more of a rounded way as you get older.

Like everything in life - have a balance and use the tool in a way that suits you. You might use it more heavily at different points of your life more intensely than other points.

But, overall, if you want to get the most out of life, you certainly don't want to be in your mid to late 30's or older, and only have pickup as your only skill or the definition of your life

Build up the other areas of your life such as career, money, health, social etc. - it's simple logic where it gives you more strings to your bow and more flexibility going forward

Use pickup and cold approach in a way that gives you maximum returns in terms of happiness, sex and relationships - don't let it use you and eat you up

Exactly. This mother fucker gets it.
Reply
#8

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Outstanding post. I definitely went through a period where I based a lot of my self esteem on my success with game. It led to some amazing experiences, but it was still a profoundly unhealthy way to view women, life, and myself. I realized I got more satisfaction out of building my skills, stacking my money, and getting in shape than I did chasing pussy. In essence, using game to get what I want, but not letting it define who I was as a person.

Only thing I'll disagree with is the whole living at home bit...there are parts of the country where rent is retardedly high and makes saving impossible (unless you're in a truly top-tier job). I personally don't judge someone for putting their money first for a couple years before moving out. It's definitely not the best choice for your mental and emotional health...but then again neither is living in abject poverty from being in an expensive area.
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#9

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-15-2018 11:23 PM)Jaxon Wrote:  

Outstanding post. I definitely went through a period where I based a lot of my self esteem on my success with game. It led to some amazing experiences, but it was still a profoundly unhealthy way to view women, life, and myself. I realized I got more satisfaction out of building my skills, stacking my money, and getting in shape than I did chasing pussy. In essence, using game to get what I want, but not letting it define who I was as a person.

Only thing I'll disagree with is the whole living at home bit...there are parts of the country where rent is retardedly high and makes saving impossible (unless you're in a truly top-tier job). I personally don't judge someone for putting their money first for a couple years before moving out. It's definitely not the best choice for your mental and emotional health...but then again neither is living in abject poverty from being in an expensive area.

Saving and putting their money first is cope out because they're scared of responsibility. I have a friend who still lives with his parents with the same excuse and makes a high 6k a month income. Being a hustler and living on own your in a not-so-great area is great because now you have a reason to become a success. It's either do or die.

Save up 3-6 worth of expenses and move out. There's no excuse.
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#10

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

I think this is, as with all general advice, a matter of what works for most.

Yes, there are guys who never want to settle down (whatever that means to them - maybe it's a wife and kids, maybe it's just a long-term girlfriend). But, I believe most men will want to settle down at some point. The statistics overwhelmingly back this assertion. Assuming that, the question becomes, how? What is the most effective strategy for, again, most men to employ to maximize their position in life?

If I have to put this in some kind of popcorn, bloggy speak (which I loathe but will do anyway), I would say that guys have seasons. And, it's like a sliding scale. A man's "player phase", if he has one, might last ten or fifteen years. And that phase might start at fifteen or it might start at twenty-five. But, eventually almost all men exit this phase of life. Many do it willingly. But, as OP warned, some guys get checked out of the game. There is a sort of male wall, and, despite all of our collagen and testosterone, we aren't completely immune to aging. Just look at how many threads there are on here talking about gaming as an older guy or gaming with big age differences. Most of the experienced guys on there will tell you that, at best, you can expect short-term fun in these situations. If you have exited or are exiting your player stage, that's bad news. It would be far better to make a soft landing with a solid girl that you locked down while you were still marketable.

There are, of course, guys who will game (or try to) until the day they die. But, my experience tells me that those men are rare. I would say they are roughly equivalent in number to the men who retire from the game and go monk. It's just not that common.

I think OP brings up some excellent points that are better considered when one is early in the game. At least that way you know where you want to go with this. Once you develop any sort of game proficiency, chasing women can become like a drug. And, like a drug, it can blind you to other areas of your life that require attention.

Currently out of office.
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#11

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-15-2018 11:58 PM)Tiger Man Wrote:  

I think this is, as with all general advice, a matter of what works for most.

Yes, there are guys who never want to settle down (whatever that means to them - maybe it's a wife and kids, maybe it's just a long-term girlfriend). But, I believe most men will want to settle down at some point. The statistics overwhelmingly back this assertion. Assuming that, the question becomes, how? What is the most effective strategy for, again, most men to employ to maximize their position in life?

If I have to put this in some kind of popcorn, bloggy speak (which I loathe but will do anyway), I would say that guys have seasons. And, it's like a sliding scale. A man's "player phase", if he has one, might last ten or fifteen years. And that phase might start at fifteen or it might start at twenty-five. But, eventually almost all men exit this phase of life. Many do it willingly. But, as OP warned, some guys get checked out of the game. There is a sort of male wall, and, despite all of our collagen and testosterone, we aren't completely immune to aging. Just look at how many threads there are on here talking about gaming as an older guy or gaming with big age differences. Most of the experienced guys on there will tell you that, at best, you can expect short-term fun in these situations. If you have exited or are exiting your player stage, that's bad news. It would be far better to make a soft landing with a solid girl that you locked down while you were still marketable.

There are, of course, guys who will game (or try to) until the day they die. But, my experience tells me that those men are rare. I would say they are roughly equivalent in number to the men who retire from the game and go monk. It's just not that common.

I think OP brings up some excellent points that are better considered when one is early in the game. At least that way you know where you want to go with this. Once you develop any sort of game proficiency, chasing women can become like a drug. And, like a drug, it can blind you to other areas of your life that require attention.

Very well said - agree with you on basically all of that

One extra thing I would note is that I don't necessarily think either lifestyle - relationship or single, is perfect, or a final solution.

I've met 1000's of girls in my life time (not a brag - more to illustrate sample size), and I'm yet to meet a girl that I think I could stay with or stay attracted to long term. They all have their faults - either they are beautiful/sexy/interesting and have a range of mental issues, or they are stable but relatively plain and not very interesting (that's generalising I know - but I'm yet to meet a girl that gives you the best of both worlds or at least can tie together the two ends of that scale in some way, shape or form).

I do think a lot of guys experience the same, but the desire to have kids and have a family wins out.

Relationships and marriage are a marathon too - a seemingly perfect relationship/marriage/family for the first 10 years can have underlying issues, and then there is a divorce and you are both in the 30-40 age range and single parents trying to get back into the dating scene.

With single life, even if you are financially secure and have freedom, it can get lonely and isolating at times, even with goals and things to do. It does cross your mind that you are missing out sometimes by not having a stable partner, family and kids in your life.

Having outlined both of those things - some guys have a family and kids and absolutely love it (the right girl comes to them at the right time in their life and it just works), and some guys enjoy the shit out of being a lone wolf, or having their finances and social life sorted and travelling without any commitments, or partners or families to worry about.

Life happens differently to different people and we are all dealt different cards.

You've (not you, but people in general) kind of got to stop looking at things as Path A and Path B, and try to play life as it comes at you while controlling the things you know you need to control.
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#12

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

8 years and that's what you have for insight?
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#13

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-15-2018 08:28 PM)MarsBlacc Wrote:  

I've been lurking on this forum for a bit and I have to say that this is the only pickup-related forum that's worth its salt. I'm going to drop a bit of knowledge for the young guys on the forum. This is pretty much me saying what I would say to my younger self.

A bit of background, I started picking up girls 8 years ago when I was 19 years old (I'm now 26 years old). I was literally the pick-up guy who was out every night trying to pick up girls’ day in and day out. I had a lot of success but I also had a lot of failures obviously.

I'm well over 150+ girls at this point (I stopped counting 3 years in at 40 kills). I've always been consistent when it came to getting girls but honestly, it’s whatever to me. I was teaching pick up for a while but stopped it because I honestly wasn’t in to taking guys out every weekend to clubs to teach pick up. It just wasn’t appealing to me.

Now, I’m career focused working at an IT company and working on my side projects. Past couple of years I’ve learned a lot about life and game and want to share it with some of you guys here. I’m not sure if everyone will find value in it but I’m hoping to reach at least one person to help them change their life around. I’m going to list some truths/lessons I've learned along the way. I'm hoping to help wake some of you guys up to start killing it at life.

Disclaimer: I'm dyslexic so excuse the grammar mistakes.

1. Focusing all your energy on women will destroy you.

I've done everything from 30-day challenges to immersions. These don't make you good or happy, they burn you out. Immersing yourself around women all the time will ultimately make you hate them. You’ll start seeing, and experiencing too much of what they are to the point where your heart will become black. Women aren’t good nor evil, they’re women. Being too immersed will make you hate them and being too distant will make you crave them. You need to be in the pocket. You want to like them but not need them if that makes sense. If you go to any of the extremes, you’re going to destroy yourself.

2. Living with your parents kills your value, identity, and results

There's nothing more repulsive than a boy that's dependent on his parents. If you're living with your parents you aren't a man. Simple. You kill your social value because you’re dependent. It’s weak and pathetic. Girls who accept this from men aren’t usually high quality anyways. If you’re 18+ and still living at home, you’re losing at life. If you are doing it to save money, you’re basically a leech. Plain and simple. Move out and rely on your own resources.

There’s something you get from being completely independent that money can’t buy. It’s pride and responsibility. It changes your swag, mindset, and identity. It’s a natural passage as a man. I don’t care if you’re living with roommates (for now), just move out of your parents. Get away from mommy and daddy. Plus, you also want to live alone to have girls over for obvious reasons. Nothing more awkward than knowing your mom is overhearing you throw some poor girl’s back out. It’s not fun, I've experienced it.

3. Don't ever compromise your identity for any woman

This isn't even to get more girls. It's for your own sanity and well-being. Nothing is worse than looking yourself in the mirror and knowing you'll do anything to get laid. Read that last sentence over, doesn’t make you cringe? Exactly. Do not comprise yourself for women. You play it your way or not at all. Anytime a girl knows you’ll bend, you’re fucked. You’re absolutely fucked. I have hundreds of references to support this. Never let a woman run the show because once you do, the show is over.

It’s like being a seasoned pilot and having a random passenger fly the plane.
Women don’t know what they want. They demand things and want things just for the sake of it. A lot of the time, it’s just a stupid shit-test just to see if you’ll jump. A good rule of thumb, if you think it’s a shit-test, ignore it, laugh it off or change subjects. Simple. If what she’s asking or suggesting something you feel uncomfortable with, do not do it. It’s the man inside you speaking to you. Don’t ignore it. Listen to it and act accordingly. Listen to your gut when this happens.

4. Pick up isn’t a winning game.


If you choose not to listen to me, you’ll only find depression, despair and hatred (for yourself and women). Your identity will be based on your sexual prowess and not your merits. It’s a game will you will not win.

Just like boxing, you don’t want boxing to retire you, you want to retire from boxing. You want to be the Floyd Mayweathers, living lavishly and with health intact, not the Muhammad Alis forced to retire, broke and physically shoot (RIP). There are some guys out there that will always be chancing the next big thing and will never know when to quit. There’s a point where you gotta know when to hang it up. This isn't saying stop talking to girls or stop getting laid but stop searching for next big thing.

If you find a girl you like, keep her around. Don’t blow it down the drain because there’s a coked up “10” that’s willing to throw some pussy at you because she’s horny. Settle down on your terms and play by your rules.

Be prepared to hang it up when the show is over and don’t look back. You had fun, you put on a show and now, it’s time to go home. Be thankful for the experience but don’t live in regret. Be happy you got the opportunity to have fun and fuck a few hot girls along the way. You don’t want to be past your prime, alone and run down because you let pick up retire you. Just understand there is an end to this game and you need to understand that it will come. Not a lot of guys understand this, remember this.

Quote: (11-15-2018 11:09 PM)MarsBlacc Wrote:  

Quote: (11-15-2018 09:48 PM)bruce_almighty Wrote:  

Is getting married and settling down with a fat slut who will divorce you and take half of your shit the end game?

This is exactly what I mean when I guy goes to the extreme of being too immersed in pickup. You start to hate women. Brother, you're extremely angry, not just at women but yourself. The fact, out of everything I just wrote, this obvious angered you the most.

Ask yourself why.

I just wanted to emphasize that settling down should be only on your terms and never as a compromise. You should never ever settle down with a woman that is below your level or that will control your life just because you are affraid to be alone. That's weak, that's beta and it's completely fucked up.
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#14

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-16-2018 01:25 PM)bruce_almighty Wrote:  

Quote: (11-15-2018 08:28 PM)MarsBlacc Wrote:  

I've been lurking on this forum for a bit and I have to say that this is the only pickup-related forum that's worth its salt. I'm going to drop a bit of knowledge for the young guys on the forum. This is pretty much me saying what I would say to my younger self.

A bit of background, I started picking up girls 8 years ago when I was 19 years old (I'm now 26 years old). I was literally the pick-up guy who was out every night trying to pick up girls’ day in and day out. I had a lot of success but I also had a lot of failures obviously.

I'm well over 150+ girls at this point (I stopped counting 3 years in at 40 kills). I've always been consistent when it came to getting girls but honestly, it’s whatever to me. I was teaching pick up for a while but stopped it because I honestly wasn’t in to taking guys out every weekend to clubs to teach pick up. It just wasn’t appealing to me.

Now, I’m career focused working at an IT company and working on my side projects. Past couple of years I’ve learned a lot about life and game and want to share it with some of you guys here. I’m not sure if everyone will find value in it but I’m hoping to reach at least one person to help them change their life around. I’m going to list some truths/lessons I've learned along the way. I'm hoping to help wake some of you guys up to start killing it at life.

Disclaimer: I'm dyslexic so excuse the grammar mistakes.

1. Focusing all your energy on women will destroy you.

I've done everything from 30-day challenges to immersions. These don't make you good or happy, they burn you out. Immersing yourself around women all the time will ultimately make you hate them. You’ll start seeing, and experiencing too much of what they are to the point where your heart will become black. Women aren’t good nor evil, they’re women. Being too immersed will make you hate them and being too distant will make you crave them. You need to be in the pocket. You want to like them but not need them if that makes sense. If you go to any of the extremes, you’re going to destroy yourself.

2. Living with your parents kills your value, identity, and results

There's nothing more repulsive than a boy that's dependent on his parents. If you're living with your parents you aren't a man. Simple. You kill your social value because you’re dependent. It’s weak and pathetic. Girls who accept this from men aren’t usually high quality anyways. If you’re 18+ and still living at home, you’re losing at life. If you are doing it to save money, you’re basically a leech. Plain and simple. Move out and rely on your own resources.

There’s something you get from being completely independent that money can’t buy. It’s pride and responsibility. It changes your swag, mindset, and identity. It’s a natural passage as a man. I don’t care if you’re living with roommates (for now), just move out of your parents. Get away from mommy and daddy. Plus, you also want to live alone to have girls over for obvious reasons. Nothing more awkward than knowing your mom is overhearing you throw some poor girl’s back out. It’s not fun, I've experienced it.

3. Don't ever compromise your identity for any woman

This isn't even to get more girls. It's for your own sanity and well-being. Nothing is worse than looking yourself in the mirror and knowing you'll do anything to get laid. Read that last sentence over, doesn’t make you cringe? Exactly. Do not comprise yourself for women. You play it your way or not at all. Anytime a girl knows you’ll bend, you’re fucked. You’re absolutely fucked. I have hundreds of references to support this. Never let a woman run the show because once you do, the show is over.

It’s like being a seasoned pilot and having a random passenger fly the plane.
Women don’t know what they want. They demand things and want things just for the sake of it. A lot of the time, it’s just a stupid shit-test just to see if you’ll jump. A good rule of thumb, if you think it’s a shit-test, ignore it, laugh it off or change subjects. Simple. If what she’s asking or suggesting something you feel uncomfortable with, do not do it. It’s the man inside you speaking to you. Don’t ignore it. Listen to it and act accordingly. Listen to your gut when this happens.

4. Pick up isn’t a winning game.


If you choose not to listen to me, you’ll only find depression, despair and hatred (for yourself and women). Your identity will be based on your sexual prowess and not your merits. It’s a game will you will not win.

Just like boxing, you don’t want boxing to retire you, you want to retire from boxing. You want to be the Floyd Mayweathers, living lavishly and with health intact, not the Muhammad Alis forced to retire, broke and physically shoot (RIP). There are some guys out there that will always be chancing the next big thing and will never know when to quit. There’s a point where you gotta know when to hang it up. This isn't saying stop talking to girls or stop getting laid but stop searching for next big thing.

If you find a girl you like, keep her around. Don’t blow it down the drain because there’s a coked up “10” that’s willing to throw some pussy at you because she’s horny. Settle down on your terms and play by your rules.

Be prepared to hang it up when the show is over and don’t look back. You had fun, you put on a show and now, it’s time to go home. Be thankful for the experience but don’t live in regret. Be happy you got the opportunity to have fun and fuck a few hot girls along the way. You don’t want to be past your prime, alone and run down because you let pick up retire you. Just understand there is an end to this game and you need to understand that it will come. Not a lot of guys understand this, remember this.

Quote: (11-15-2018 11:09 PM)MarsBlacc Wrote:  

Quote: (11-15-2018 09:48 PM)bruce_almighty Wrote:  

Is getting married and settling down with a fat slut who will divorce you and take half of your shit the end game?

This is exactly what I mean when I guy goes to the extreme of being too immersed in pickup. You start to hate women. Brother, you're extremely angry, not just at women but yourself. The fact, out of everything I just wrote, this obvious angered you the most.

Ask yourself why.

I just wanted to emphasize that settling down should be only on your terms and never as a compromise. You should never ever settle down with a woman that is below your level or that will control your life just because you are affraid to be alone. That's weak, that's beta and it's completely fucked up.

I believe some of you guys never actually read the post.

I highly recommend you read it.
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#15

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-15-2018 10:03 PM)a beer is enough Wrote:  

....
First they tell you that your 30s are your prime and then they shame you for wanting to sleep around, its like why not just be transparent and say shit goes downhill after 25?...

Who is "they" that is always droning on and on about the same tiresome topic?

Are you even actually "sleeping around" or just wanting to and ruminating about it endlessly?

Seriously who are the "they " in your life "shaming you about wanting to sleep around"?

Its funny because of the dozens and dozens of times I showed up to social and even family events sporting new arm candy the only one who ever said "PT my love, when are you going to find a nice girl and settle down?"... was my mom. ( My response was always "When I find one as good as you")

However if "they" ever had voiced an opinion as to what was doing with my life I would had promptly ignored them as I generally do to people that are unimportant to me or if appropriate calmly told them to fuck off and mind their own business.

Beer you keep harping on the same external issues when you need to be focused on your internal dialogue. Your obsessed with symptoms and ignoring the disease: a poor mindset

The first step in getting anything you want in life is to be an actual man. A grown man self determines his own outcomes.

If youre desires are conflicting cultural norms then you need to come to terms with it one way or the other. Do you want whatever it is you want more than you want to fit in?

If youre looking for others (external) approval of your life choices first the you still have some growing up to do (internal).

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
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#16

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

I think a lot of the debate can be resolved by what the OP is saying here

Quote:Quote:

If you find a girl you like, keep her around. Don’t blow it down the drain because there’s a coked up “10” that’s willing to throw some pussy at you because she’s horny.

In other words, he's not saying you should retire because you're too old to chase. He's saying stop chasing if you meet somebody who fulfills you. And I think we all know it when that happens.

If it won't matter in 30 years, it doesn't matter now.

My thoughts and memoirs: yourfriendtrent.wordpress.com
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#17

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-16-2018 02:28 PM)Trent W. Wrote:  

I think a lot of the debate can be resolved by what the OP is saying here

Quote:Quote:

If you find a girl you like, keep her around. Don’t blow it down the drain because there’s a coked up “10” that’s willing to throw some pussy at you because she’s horny.

In other words, he's not saying you should retire because you're too old to chase. He's saying stop chasing if you meet somebody who fulfills you. And I think we all know it when that happens.

Thank you for getting what I'm saying. I was confused why the other guys were saying I'm advocating marrying a slut fat and etc. lol

Honestly, appreciate the fact you understand what I'm saying.
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#18

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Hey OP do you think you could drop some practical PUA/Game knowledge for us? 7 years in the game is a long time.
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#19

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-16-2018 03:13 PM)tr1cky Wrote:  

Hey OP do you think you could drop some practical PUA/Game knowledge for us? 7 years in the game is a long time.

This is "pt. 1" in the middle of "pt. 2"

Be patience young Jedi. [Image: wink.gif]
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#20

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

I think it's generally agreed that Game is a tool and skill like GT777733 so perfectly wrote about.

I've been around alot of girls in my life and the more years and women that pass it's glaringly obvious that women aren't the end all be all for a man.

There's nothing wrong with settling down once you've diversified and sharpened your skill set.

Some guys need a couple of girls to learn this, some guys run through 100's of girls and settle down, some guys don't at all (these are outliers).


The last year I've had less and less dates and higher and higher quality, recently apart of me was awoken that I haven't had in a long time - wanting a stable solid girl in life - the thing that's in the way - the player's mindset that's solidified in me.

I want my cake and eat it also. That's something I'm working on.


I think it's well known men shouldn't compromise their identity for a women, that's one of the first things we learn about.

Frame, it's the name of the game, and you should never relinquish it. "Give a woman an inch....she'll take a mile"


When it comes to energy, I notice I spent less and less time on mediocre women, however I do spend a bit more energy in women I'm really interested in, so it's hit or miss.

I've also been called out on not making changes when I should be (being in my early 30's it's critical).


I'd also like to say in this Forum's defense, we aren't just a "PUA" forum - most members cringe at that label.

We're WAY beyond that, we're into lifestyles, travel, self help, money making, philosophical, political, etc.

Yes it started as that, but Roosh and company passed that PUA label a LONG time ago.

We're spiritual warriors, trying to find ourselves, find our way, help eachother, support our country(s), and understand this mess of a world we're in.
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#21

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

I actually got laid the most when I moved back in with my parents to save money! haha.
Maybe it's a UK thing, but girls just didn't seem to care at all/ Especially the very young ones who are the ones I actually want [Image: smile.gif]
I guess it was also partly because I had more money to actually go out and meet people (having my own place at that time meant every penny went on food and rent. UK is pricey!), plus my parents had a kick ass hot tub which I used to convince girls to come back with me after the bars closed!
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#22

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-15-2018 08:28 PM)MarsBlacc Wrote:  

2. Living with your parents kills your value, identity, and results

There's nothing more repulsive than a boy that's dependent on his parents. If you're living with your parents you aren't a man. Simple. You kill your social value because you’re dependent. It’s weak and pathetic. Girls who accept this from men aren’t usually high quality anyways. If you’re 18+ and still living at home, you’re losing at life. If you are doing it to save money, you’re basically a leech. Plain and simple. Move out and rely on your own resources.

There’s something you get from being completely independent that money can’t buy. It’s pride and responsibility. It changes your swag, mindset, and identity. It’s a natural passage as a man. I don’t care if you’re living with roommates (for now), just move out of your parents. Get away from mommy and daddy. Plus, you also want to live alone to have girls over for obvious reasons. Nothing more awkward than knowing your mom is overhearing you throw some poor girl’s back out. It’s not fun, I've experienced it.

You talk about not focusing all your energy on women but then say don't live at home at 18 because you won't get laid?

I must disagree with this point here especially telling guys at 18 to move out ASAP. Fresh out of high school, a young man should gain some sort of skill(s) which costs money. Telling an 18 year old to move out of right away while trying to acquire these skills is to tell him to take on a ton of debt especially with the cost of living nowadays in major cities.

During the years after high school, getting started on the right track financially, not accruing substantial debt and developing useful skills is much more important than living beyond one's means and looking "cool."
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#23

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

If you read fully of this forum, its more about being the best you - women will come when you do the work and improve yourself.

I've got better things to do with my life than annoy a 1000 random women in a shopping mall in the hope of getting my dick wet.

As Kaotic said: "We're WAY beyond that, we're into lifestyles, travel, self help, money making, philosophical, political, etc."

For me, I don't know where I can find a more magnificent collection or real men, with real opinions, knowledge and a drive to succeed, and a willingness to help others. (no homo)
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#24

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

Quote: (11-16-2018 03:43 PM)subterfuge Wrote:  

I actually got laid the most when I moved back in with my parents to save money! haha.
Maybe it's a UK thing, but girls just didn't seem to care at all/ Especially the very young ones who are the ones I actually want [Image: smile.gif]
I guess it was also partly because I had more money to actually go out and meet people (having my own place at that time meant every penny went on food and rent. UK is pricey!), plus my parents had a kick ass hot tub which I used to convince girls to come back with me after the bars closed!

I often thought that if I were a young man that had to live with his parents I'd just tell girls that it was my house and I was letting them live with me

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
Reply
#25

Lessons I Learned About Pickup/Women After 8 Years Hustling pt. 1

>>If you’re 18+ and still living at home, you’re losing at life. If you are doing it to save money, you’re basically a leech.

It's been a long time since I was 18. I moved out myself then because of problems with my parents, but I knew lots of guys who lived in their parents basements while attending the local university. Some of these guys went on to law or medical school and remained in those basements (which were bachelor pad palaces compared to the dump I was in, separate entrance, multiple rooms, pool tables, wet bar, etc), into their 30's, even after being married. These guys were most certainly not shacking up with low quality women. I don't know how it is now, but back then former jocks future doctors from wealthy families got their pick of the top sorority girls. But to you these guys would have been repulsive non-men leeches... If you think about it, everyone who ever inherited anything from their parents is a leech by your definition.

I second what the guy above said: there a contradiction between saying don't make women your primary focus and then spending huge amounts of money to have your own apartment/house, which amounts to making them your primary focus.
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