[Professor When]

What's the subtext here? She seemed to like me, texted her "going to a party tonight. you drink?" She texted me 6 hours later, after the party "I don't feel like I know you well enough to hang out and drink."

Is this a "try again" or a "back off?"

[CleanSlate]

It sounds like an excuse.

It’s a long shot, but try this: “it’s just a drink, not a marriage proposal.”

[Mess O.]

Try Slate's idea, but really, be ready to forget about it. Try to resist the inclination to analyze the hell out of the deal.

[Professor When]

(11-02-2018 11:27 PM)CleanSlate Wrote:  

It sounds like an excuse.

It’s a long shot, but try this: “it’s just a drink, not a marriage proposal.”

I can't tell if you're mocking me. I honestly think that sounded like a good line to cut through the awkwardness she introduced.


I tend to over-analyze. That's why you guys to give me perspective.

[Mess O.]

He meant it as a genuine line as a last-ditch effort to try to salvage an interaction that's unlikely to continue.

[Professor When]

Okay. It's just that that line is what I mentioned thinking about (but ended up not) replying in the thread about the other girl I'm over-analyzing.

Since its after 1 and I'm going to sleep, I figured I'd text her tomorrow "too bad, I've been told that I'm a fun drunk."

[PapayaTapper]

Quote:

"I don't feel like I know you well enough to hang out and drink."

Basic shit test

(11-03-2018 12:22 AM)Professor When Wrote:  

"too bad, I've been told that I'm a fun drunk."

^No. This is giving her power by legitimizing her excuse. Test failed

(11-02-2018 11:27 PM)CleanSlate Wrote:  

It sounds like an excuse.

It’s a long shot, but try this: “it’s just a drink, not a marriage proposal.”

^ Yes. This defuses her objection and ever so slightly pokes fun at her with no butt hurt. Test passed

[Noir]

Light hearted, re-frame switch.

"that's a shame i was planning our future together #alldaylong"
"should I return this diamond ring then?"

[BadBoyGamer]

Sounds like online dating crap. Go approach some girls in real life.

Seriously. Why you even trying to deal with this kind of shit?

[Repo]

Line I have used in similar situations that has worked some of the time "Its ok we'll call my mom on speakerphone before we order anything"

[Captain Gh]

I told you this in one of your previous thread: you clearly are not creating enough rapport with these girls. Even for girls who just want to Fuck around...it's highly unattractive behavior. The 6 hour response... and what she wrote... is a tell tale sign of that!

You're in that space where you display enough attraction to keep em interested... but they seem to be uncomfortable around you! I would highly suggest meeting with a Forum member in the future if this keeps happening. Don't get discouraged though! You've got women responding... you simply need to learn what works for YOU to keep em coming.

Takes time! You'll get there! R u good @ Rambling?

[Professor When]

(11-03-2018 05:06 AM)BadBoyGamer Wrote:  

Sounds like online dating crap. Go approach some girls in real life.

Seriously. Why you even trying to deal with this kind of shit?

This is in meatspace. I don't really like online dating.

(11-03-2018 05:12 PM)Captain Gh Wrote:  

I told you this in one of your previous thread: you clearly are not creating enough rapport with these girls. Even for girls who just want to Fuck around...it's highly unattractive behavior. The 6 hour response... and what she wrote... is a tell tale sign of that!

You're in that space where you display enough attraction to keep em interested... but they seem to be uncomfortable around you! I would highly suggest meeting with a Forum member in the future if this keeps happening. Don't get discouraged though! You've got women responding... you simply need to learn what works for YOU to keep em coming.

Takes time! You'll get there! R u good @ Rambling?

Oh, I am absolutely terrible at rambling. I hate small talk, so this is something I'm really trying to work on. I have this terrible habit of checking out of the conversation when it bores me. Or worse, segueing into topics that make their eyes glaze over - I get this shit even talking to people in my major about relevant things.

As for meeting forum members, I really don't want to put people in the position of fixing my crap until I at least manage to get some success on my own.

[PapayaTapper]

Conversations with a girl shouldn't be about conveying information to her. They should be about creating the emotional responses you want from her.

Learning to properly sexualize the conversation is the key to this.

Keep it light, fun, flirty

[Captain Gh]

(11-03-2018 08:18 PM)Professor When Wrote:  

(11-03-2018 05:06 AM)BadBoyGamer Wrote:  

Sounds like online dating crap. Go approach some girls in real life.

Seriously. Why you even trying to deal with this kind of shit?

This is in meatspace. I don't really like online dating.

(11-03-2018 05:12 PM)Captain Gh Wrote:  

I told you this in one of your previous thread: you clearly are not creating enough rapport with these girls. Even for girls who just want to Fuck around...it's highly unattractive behavior. The 6 hour response... and what she wrote... is a tell tale sign of that!

You're in that space where you display enough attraction to keep em interested... but they seem to be uncomfortable around you! I would highly suggest meeting with a Forum member in the future if this keeps happening. Don't get discouraged though! You've got women responding... you simply need to learn what works for YOU to keep em coming.

Takes time! You'll get there! R u good @ Rambling?

Oh, I am absolutely terrible at rambling. I hate small talk, so this is something I'm really trying to work on. I have this terrible habit of checking out of the conversation when it bores me. Or worse, segueing into topics that make their eyes glaze over - I get this shit even talking to people in my major about relevant things.

As for meeting forum members, I really don't want to put people in the position of fixing my crap until I at least manage to get some success on my own.

Yeah ok that's understandable! Well if you're willing to invest a little $$$ to speed up your success... there's a coach named Bobby Rio who has really good material focusing strictly on building rapport & rambling. Absolutely not needed... but if you want to skip over some mistakes... I would recommend him!

[JackinMelbourne]

"Perfect, let's get to know each other over a drink".

Who cares what she's trying to do or what she means... but she's either shit testing you or getting nervous (often misjudged excitement).

So whoever mentioned re-frame above is 100% correct regardless of her "reasons".

[Hypno]

(11-08-2018 01:34 AM)JackinMelbourne Wrote:  

"Perfect, let's get to know each other over a drink".

That's very good. I try to insert the word perfect even if I know we are not entirely aligned. Don' worry about non-sequitirs, women don't.

Here is another resonse:

Seriously? I though you the adventurous type.

[BBinger]

(11-08-2018 06:03 AM)Hypno Wrote:  

(11-08-2018 01:34 AM)JackinMelbourne Wrote:  

"Perfect, let's get to know each other over a drink".

That's very good. I try to insert the word perfect even if I know we are not entirely aligned. Don' worry about non-sequitirs, women don't.

Here is another resonse:

Seriously? I though you the adventurous type.

Another way to play this is "Ok, you can watch me drink and spill my secrets if you promise not to share the missile codes."

I agree with the other posters. Is there interest, yes. Is there rapport, no. Gotta be more playful whether it is dropping a non-sequitur or offering some fun bait that just eases the nerves enough but pushing the interest higher. A laugh is good, but you want less "ha ha funny" and more "here's a winner, I can't help but agree because the juices are telling me to."

Maybe get online, pick a different city, and shoot below what you are drawing in your location to get some practice being playful. There are many slang terms for girls. Some like "broads"are self explanitory. Girls got big hips and narrow shoulders. Others like "kittens" you gotta investigate how to apply to benefit yourself. Girls wanna have fun, and delivering them fun through game is the best way in.

Heartiste's archives, especially the political stuff can give you some insight on how to start hitting that fun spot while working on first date logistics. If nothing else Europe in the past decades has shown that presenting yourself as "other" is not a losing move. You can't treat a girl like a goalie trying to keep you from scoring. She wants to fill her holes, but she wants to have a good time getting them filled.