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Girl sitting down next to you
#1

Girl sitting down next to you

Im sitting at the library and i see this girl coming towards me, she smiles i smile back. She looks like she's looking for a place to sit down. There's a lot of spaces empty but she decides to sit next to me. "Hey can i sit here?" "Of course" i say. She sits down and stares at me a few times is what i notice from the corner of my eye. I do nothing about it. She sits on her phone for 2 minutes, looks at me a last time, then grabs her bag and leaves.

Is this an IOI and she wanted me to say something, or am i just misunderstanding it all. If it was an IOI what do you guys say in this case? How do you open up a girl completely silent sitting there on her phone?

In my head something says, dont bother her she just wants to sit here, but on the other side she obviously wanted to sit there next to me. 10 other spaces empty and people usually try to avoid contact. Either i fucked up a chance or im misunderstanding this for an IOI.
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#2

Girl sitting down next to you

Quote: (09-04-2018 07:40 AM)lifecrisis Wrote:  

Im sitting at the library and i see this girl coming towards me, she smiles i smile back. She looks like she's looking for a place to sit down. There's a lot of spaces empty but she decides to sit next to me. "Hey can i sit here?" "Of course" i say. She sits down and stares at me a few times is what i notice from the corner of my eye. I do nothing about it. She sits on her phone for 2 minutes, looks at me a last time, then grabs her bag and leaves.

Is this an IOI and she wanted me to say something, or am i just misunderstanding it all. If it was an IOI what do you guys say in this case? How do you open up a girl completely silent sitting there on her phone?

In my head something says, dont bother her she just wants to sit here, but on the other side she obviously wanted to sit there next to me. 10 other spaces empty and people usually try to avoid contact. Either i fucked up a chance or im misunderstanding this for an IOI.

Lol that sounds about as clear as an IOI ever gets. Unless you're not telling us something she 100% wanted you to initiate and talk to her.
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#3

Girl sitting down next to you

Quote: (09-04-2018 07:40 AM)lifecrisis Wrote:  

Either i fucked up a chance or im misunderstanding this for an IOI.

You fucked up a chance. She practically fell into your lap.

In a situation like this you shouldn't even be thinking whether it's an IOI. Remember the basics: assume attraction, you have nothing to lose.
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#4

Girl sitting down next to you

Nice question:

a) Who cares if it was an IOI? Are you interested?
Then break the ice with some seinfeldian remark about something going on in the area, or something you're doing -- for example if you were reading something obscure you could just say "sure you can sit here -- just try not to notice what I'm reading, it's really embarassing", baiting her to ask about it, which is good if you can spin that topic into something general + get her talking. Otherwise, no pressure to make a conversation, just a little innocent remark / chuckle from her. Then if you think of something a few minutes later, you're already warmed up.

b) Yes, it was probably an IOI.
In my experience, say I'm on the subway, a girl sits down next to me and I see her doing more than the usual settling-in, kind of peripherally checking-me-out: then YES she is interested or at least curious. [Regardless of whether it was the "last seat" -- because she did a little more than the usual, kept looking every so often, etc.]


Whenever I notice this behavior, and I decided to test it, I wait a few beats, turn to her and crack a little smile, and she inevitably will return it (as if she knew she was "caught").

Usually it's then easy to start talking to her. A few times, just making that acknowledging look prompted HER to open me -- one even said, shit you not, "so, what stop are you getting off at?". [When girl make "opener 101" lines at you, it's a Very Good sign she digs you.]

---

Paramount to the above is that no matter how you play it, you aren't being creepy, or anything -- you're just being social around your environment.

If you want to put a sexual or flirty subtext, you can do that in a way that surrounding people won't really notice the difference. Use your voice and tonality, eyes, choice of topics, level of "challenge" you present to her, etc.
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#5

Girl sitting down next to you

When I can't think of anything to talk about I make a comment about the weather.

Don't let the next opportunity with her or another girl slip away

It's better to botch it than miss it
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#6

Girl sitting down next to you

Quote: (09-04-2018 07:40 AM)lifecrisis Wrote:  

Im sitting at the library and i see this girl coming towards me, she smiles i smile back. She looks like she's looking for a place to sit down. There's a lot of spaces empty but she decides to sit next to me. "Hey can i sit here?" "Of course" i say. She sits down and stares at me a few times is what i notice from the corner of my eye. I do nothing about it. She sits on her phone for 2 minutes, looks at me a last time, then grabs her bag and leaves.

Is this an IOI and she wanted me to say something, or am i just misunderstanding it all. If it was an IOI what do you guys say in this case? How do you open up a girl completely silent sitting there on her phone?

In my head something says, dont bother her she just wants to sit here, but on the other side she obviously wanted to sit there next to me. 10 other spaces empty and people usually try to avoid contact. Either i fucked up a chance or im misunderstanding this for an IOI.

That's what happens when we use online dating apps only. Once in a bloom moon, when the real thing happens and a pussy is handed in to you on the silver platter, we freeze out. I hope you learnt your lesson. Any woman's reaction towards you, you should treat as FALSE POSITIVE. Be overconfident, act is if you owned the place and never ever get phased out by a woman's reaction. You make things happen, not the other way round.

- She shows you her tits, she wants the D
- She looks at you, she wants the D
- She asks what time it is, she wants the D
- She shows you her middle finger, she wants the D
- She says 'maybe', she wants the D

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#7

Girl sitting down next to you

Thank you everyone for the advice, ksbms you're right i froze and didn't know what to do. I need to stop thinking "it was just random" and start thinking it as she's interested. Im usually very slow on catching on the signs girls give me, but this one seemed obvious when i think about it. But it was just awkward, at the library, completely silence, didn't know what to say.

But this isnt the first time ive seen this girl, she comes quite often to the library around the same time i do, so the chance of seeing her again is 100%. I can go fuck it style and talk to her the next time i see her. We can see if she really was interested or what she's all about. Hopefully she didn't lose the interest by me not making a move.
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#8

Girl sitting down next to you

On the other hand, sometimes a pipe is just a pipe.
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#9

Girl sitting down next to you

On the other hand, sometimes a pipe is just a pipe. I try not to over think things and act as I please.
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#10

Girl sitting down next to you

The three second rule isn't for you, it is for her.

If you don't act on it, she feels rejected and leaves.

No big deal though, it takes a few of these to figure it out.

Sitting near you, hovering around, walking into your path, pretending to bump into you, sometimes even making eye contact from across the street.

Pretty lame as far as initiating a relationship, you might think.

Nothing, right?

In her mind she has gone way out on a limb, taken all the risks, really put it all on the line, and if you don't immediately take over the interaction, she gets humiliated and leaves.

Even worse, once you have figured it out, she could just sit there blankly, showing no interest, not contributing, and then you think you are messing it up, but when you leave she gets a panicked expression like: "Where are you going???"

So in her mind, not really approaching you directly, sitting like a yard gnome during the conversation, offering no encouragement whatsoever, in her mind, things are going fine.

And sometimes, you can get all that right, and if you don't sexualize things fast enough, she gets demoralized and thinks you don't like her, so she starts insulting you to hide how inadequate she feels.

And if you ask them, it is men who have no social skills.

“The greatest burden a child must bear is the unlived life of its parents.”

Carl Jung
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#11

Girl sitting down next to you

Yea i have a few too many of these. I get an attitude or something like,' yea just another girl'...

The hotter the girl, the more subtle the clue will be also.
Had a girl staring at me but i was talking to a hottie, wtf was i supposed to do? I knew i wasnt getting the hottie, but wasnt expecting this girl to be interested in me. Im going nuts...
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#12

Girl sitting down next to you

I got on a hot stinky bus in colombia once and took the second last seat at the back of the bus which had a row of four seats. I took the spot next to a young dude because the other spot was next to a fat old sweaty bitch. The last person to get on the bus had no option other than to sit between me and the fat lady, it turned out to be a cute 18 year old slim black girl, my favourite type. As we left the station, she started talking to me, the ride soon got rough and we had to hold onto each other. Long story short over the next three hours I was making out with her and finger banging her pussy hole. I then fucked her brains out for ten straight days, she had nowhere to be but on my gringo cock.

Moral of the story: make the move

Something very similar happened to me with a 19 year old in the Philippines but I didn’t nail her until the next day. They were two of the top ten hottest girls I’ve fucked in my life.
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#13

Girl sitting down next to you

She's a socially stifled cell phone addict. She sat down next to you and desperately searched tinder for you but couldn't find you.
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#14

Girl sitting down next to you

Let me make it easy for you. This the blueprint of every seduction.

1) She feels attracted to you
2) She is receptive to your approach (this could mean giving you proximity or staring at you).
3) Her game ends here. The rest is you.

Unless she is a maneater, this is female game for 99% of women. Do not expect more from them than this.

Now let me tell you what your game should look like.

1) Say "How are you?" You can never FAIL with this line when you get the above IOI. It is giving her exactly what she wants. Smooth openor. Not too heavy. Socially calibrated.
2) Ramble - I think Roosh talk about this. She is already attracted to you. Your game is not about trying to impress her. Your game is about "chillin" with her. You can even mix it up with playful banter. Whatever fits your style. This is where you simply "chill" with her.
3) When you see a window, escalate. A window is seen through her body language. You cannot miss it. Unless you are autistic. You can escalate verbally or physically.

At night game, I close the distance, touch her, and tell her she is sexy. During the day time, I simply tell her "We should hang out sometime."

Remember, you are not really seducing her. Her window is what prompted you to escalate. In her mind, she thinks she is the one seducing you.

This is the blueprint for literally every romantic interaction. Girl sees guy. Girl gives guy signals. Guy opens and tries his best not to mess up. Girl gives guy window. Guy jumps through window. They both come up with an excuse to be alone where sex can happy. The end.

The exception is that you approached without an IOI. In that case, you would have to run more "attraction game" until a window opens up.
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