Since I've gotten a ton of value from the forum, I figured I'd give back by writing up a datasheet on Mukachevo, a city that I spent the past weekend in but hasn't been talked about much on RVF.
Mukachevo (also known as Munkács, its Hungarian name) is a small city (pop. 86,339) located in Zakarpattia (Transcarpathia) Oblast in the extreme southwest of Ukraine, a stone's throw from the Hungarian border. Zakarpattia was historically part of Hungary from the 9th century A.D. up until World War I. In 1920, the region was transferred to Czechoslovakia as part of the Treaty of Trianon. Hungary briefly retook it in the lead-up to World War II, but it was annexed by the Soviet Union in 1945 and incorporated into the Ukrainian SSR, with most Hungarians expelled.
While there are only a handful of Hungarians left in Mukachevo, the city's architecture has an unmistakably Hungarian character. If you've been to Győr, Debrecen, or any smaller city in Hungary, the downtown Myru Square area (the heart of the city) and Mukachevo Town Hall look very similar. The city's main tourist attraction (its only attraction, to be honest) is Palanok Castle, a Hungarian castle that was built in the 14th century. You'll also notice a greater dominance of Hungarian businesses and brands in Mukachevo compared to the rest of Ukraine, from Chio brand chips and Bomba energy drinks in stores to OTP Bank branches.
Because Mukachevo is located on the Pannonian Plain, its weather is similar to Budapest's and better than Lviv/other parts of Western Ukraine. Temperatures are milder, with cooler, drier summers and (presumably) warmer winters, and there's also more sunshine: the sun was shining the entire time I was there. Temperatures topped out around 20 degrees Celsius during the day and bottomed out at nine degrees Celsius at night.
Mukachevo is worth a weekend visit if you're in the area, but I don't recommend it for a long-term stay. While the city is pleasant enough for a weekend, there's very little in terms of touristy things to do, very little nightlife, and not many people. Day game is possible, but the small population means you can blow through most girls quickly, and the conservative ethos of the city means you'll likely need a while before you get anywhere.
How to Get There
Zakarpattia is physically isolated from the rest of Ukraine. Ever since Motor Sich Airlines canceled their Kiev-Uzhhorod route two years ago, the oblast has no regularly scheduled air service, so the only way in is by car, bus, or train. Because Mukachevo is on the far side of the Carpathian Mountains and because the Ukrainian government has neglected the infrastructure in Zakarpattia, traveling there by train takes forever. Expect to spend 12+ hours if you go by train from Kiev or points east.
The fastest way to get to Mukachevo if you're not already in Ukraine is to fly to Budapest and take the train from there. You can also fly to Lviv since the airport there has some international connections. Mukachevo is on the main train line between Budapest and Lviv and is about midway between the two cities. If you're coming from Budapest, use this post I wrote to plan your itinerary since getting direct train connections between Hungary and Ukraine is difficult (just change the final leg of the journey from Chop -> Lviv to Chop -> Mukachevo): https://mattforney.com/travel-budapest-lviv-train/
Coming from Budapest will cost about $30-40.
If you're coming from Lviv, there are a number of direct trains to Mukachevo. Expect to ride on either a dirty Brezhnev-era train with a squat toilet or a sleeper train. Get a first class ticket if possible so you don't have to be stuck around Gypsies and low-class Ukrainians groping their Hungarian girlfriends. You'll probably pay about $5-10.
Mukachevo is close to the other two major cities in Zakarpattia, Uzhhorod and Berehovo, so you can hop over there for day trips if you get bored. There are frequent trains from Mukachevo to Uzhhorod, as well as marshrutkas. To get to Berehovo, you'll have to use a marshrutka since the only train that goes there is a sleeper from Lviv that leaves in the very early morning and also goes out of the way to Chop (it's targeted at people going to/from Romania and Hungary). The cities are also close enough that you could probably pay a taxi driver to get you there too.
Logistics
Try and stay near the Mukachevo Town Hall/Myru Square since everything of importance (save for Palanok Castle and the train station) is within a block or two from it. I stayed in a spacious one-bedroom apartment directly across from the Town Hall, with a bunch of restaurants, cafes, 24/7 supermarkets, and a small mall within walking distance. Prices in general are noticeably lower than Lviv and other cities; dinner at a sit-down restaurant will run you maybe $4-5, and I paid only $22 a night for my place (an apartment of the same size in Lviv would run at least twice as much, likely more in the summer).
There are buses/marshrutkas available, as well as taxis, but the city is small enough that you can pretty much walk everywhere. There seems to be some crime---I was walking along a side street in the afternoon and saw a dude who'd been fucked up in a fight, because he was walking with a limp and his face was covered in blood---as well as a small Gypsy population, but stick to Myru Square after dark and you'll be fine.
I wasn't warned against drinking the tap water, but I bought bottled water just to be safe. This is Ukraine, after all.
What to Do
As I mentioned above, Palanok Castle is really the only thing Mukachevo has to offer for tourists: no museums, nothing else. It's a bit of a hike from Myru Square---about 45 minutes, including walking uphill---but worth the trip. The entrance fee is ₴40 (about $1.50) and much of the castle is open to the public. The castle is in varying states of disrepair---for example, the courtyard has been newly repainted, but the Western Bastion is falling apart---but it's still really cool if you like castles.
There are tours of Palanok Castle available, but only in Ukrainian, and a fair amount of the castle's information is only in Ukrainian or Hungarian, though the main exhibits (including an exhibit about the life of Ferenc Kazinczy and another about the Rákóczi dynasty) are in English. There's also a restaurant on site, as well as a souvenir shop selling replica medieval armor.
Aside from that, Mukachevo's main sights involve walking around Myru Square and admiring the Town Hall, churches, and other historic Hungarian buildings. Once you get more than two blocks from Myru Square, the crowds disappear, the businesses thin out, and the buildings get more run down. The Latorica River is particularly depressing: it runs through the center of town, but there's zero development on the riverfront and it looks like a swamp. You can't even walk up to the river because it's blocked off by concrete barriers, and the statues are covered in graffiti.
For that matter, while the Myru Square area is (mostly) immaculately maintained, the upper floors of some buildings badly need a paint job. Mukachevo is a perfect example of what Roosh meant in Bang Ukraine when he described Ukraine as a "paint-over culture," with lots of skimping on basic maintenance in favor of short-term solutions.
Where to Go
Mukachevo has no nightlife to speak of. People go to bed early, restaurants and bars close up around 10pm to midnight, and crowds peter out by 9:30. The only restaurants/bars I can recommend are Barry Barr's and Milenium.
Milenium is a riverfront restaurant (or at least as close to the river as the barriers allow) on the far side of the Latorica River. The waiters' English is spotty, but the menus are in English and Hungarian. Food is really good---I had the banosh---and service is fast. It's also easy to get a table on Friday and Saturday nights.
Barry Barr's is an Irish pub on Yaroslava Mudroho Street. The food is pretty good and the waiters have good English. Menus are also in English. It gets packed on Saturdays.
There are a number of smaller cafes and lunch places around Myru Square, including a Lviv Croissants franchise, as well as plenty of free WiFi spots.
The Girls
Mukachevo girls are not as hot as other Ukrainian girls. While they're still better-looking than the average American girl (not a high bar), they're a full point below girls in Lviv, with shorter, stockier bodies and less attractive faces. Basically, they look like a hybrid of Ukrainians, Hungarians, and Slovaks. The flip side is that they seem to age better than other Ukrainians; I only saw one babushka there, with most older women aging like Hungarians or Slovaks do.
There's also a shocking number of fatties, with local girls packing more pounds than you'd think a Ukrainian girl is legally allowed to have. Girls here don't dress as well as other Ukrainians, with fewer heels, dresses, and less makeup. The hottest girl I talked to was a Slovak. English fluency is spottier than Lviv; only half of the girls I spoke to were fluent enough to have a conversation with me.
The upside is that due to a lack of English-speaking tourists (most tourists are Czechs, Slovaks, or Hungarians, with a few Poles), if you're American, people will immediately take an interest in you. Most of the girls I talked to (the ones who could speak English, anyway) were curious as to what an American was doing in Mukachevo. I even had a couple at a convenience store chat me up so they could practice their English. That's never happened to me anywhere else in Ukraine. Best of all: no Turks. The city in general has a friendly, relaxed vibe similar to Lviv.
Given Mukachevo's small size, the city has a village-like atmosphere where everyone knows each other. You'd need a significant amount of time here (and some fluency in Ukrainian) to get anywhere with girls, and you might also be hobbled by your foreigner status in some respects.
Where to Meet Girls
It's day game in Mukachevo or bust, unless you can insert yourself into a social circle. Myru Square and the surrounding streets are the only places with crowds thick enough for there to be girls to approach. There's also a bit of action on the other side of the Latorica River (near Milenium) and at Daily (Щодня), the mall I mentioned earlier. As I mentioned earlier, though, the small population means you will run out of targets quickly.
There are some cute tourist girls in and around Palanok Castle, but going to Ukraine to bang Hungarians or Slovaks is like going to KFC for the coleslaw.
Final Thoughts
Mukachevo reminds me of small college towns like Ames, Iowa or Ithaca, New York in that it's small, friendly, and doesn't have much to do. I enjoyed my visit, but that's in part because my expectations for it weren't too high, and I don't feel the need to come back. While Mukachevo may not be inundated with English-speaking foreigners or Turkish sex tourists, its small population and spotty levels of English are big hurdles, and there's a general lack of things to do and places to go.
According to WeekendCasanova, Uzhhorod might be a better place to go because it's slightly larger (about 110,000) and also has a university, so there are more girls to talk to. I haven't been there so I can't really say, but I'm guessing the girls probably look similar to the ones in Mukachevo: thread-66224.html
I'd thought about taking a day trip to Berehovo, but I doubt the talent is better there, either: Berehovo is an ethnic Hungarian city (it's the center of the Hungarian minority in Ukraine).
In short, Mukachevo is really only worth visiting if you're in Budapest, Lviv, or Košice, since it's not far from all three cities. If you're taking the train between Lviv and Budapest, Mukachevo is a good place to stop since it's midway between both cities (the train trip is about twelve hours). Palanok Castle is definitely worth a visit if you like castles, but the city doesn't have much to offer beyond that. I wouldn't go out of my way to come here if I lived elsewhere in Ukraine or were coming from abroad.
Mukachevo (also known as Munkács, its Hungarian name) is a small city (pop. 86,339) located in Zakarpattia (Transcarpathia) Oblast in the extreme southwest of Ukraine, a stone's throw from the Hungarian border. Zakarpattia was historically part of Hungary from the 9th century A.D. up until World War I. In 1920, the region was transferred to Czechoslovakia as part of the Treaty of Trianon. Hungary briefly retook it in the lead-up to World War II, but it was annexed by the Soviet Union in 1945 and incorporated into the Ukrainian SSR, with most Hungarians expelled.
While there are only a handful of Hungarians left in Mukachevo, the city's architecture has an unmistakably Hungarian character. If you've been to Győr, Debrecen, or any smaller city in Hungary, the downtown Myru Square area (the heart of the city) and Mukachevo Town Hall look very similar. The city's main tourist attraction (its only attraction, to be honest) is Palanok Castle, a Hungarian castle that was built in the 14th century. You'll also notice a greater dominance of Hungarian businesses and brands in Mukachevo compared to the rest of Ukraine, from Chio brand chips and Bomba energy drinks in stores to OTP Bank branches.
Because Mukachevo is located on the Pannonian Plain, its weather is similar to Budapest's and better than Lviv/other parts of Western Ukraine. Temperatures are milder, with cooler, drier summers and (presumably) warmer winters, and there's also more sunshine: the sun was shining the entire time I was there. Temperatures topped out around 20 degrees Celsius during the day and bottomed out at nine degrees Celsius at night.
Mukachevo is worth a weekend visit if you're in the area, but I don't recommend it for a long-term stay. While the city is pleasant enough for a weekend, there's very little in terms of touristy things to do, very little nightlife, and not many people. Day game is possible, but the small population means you can blow through most girls quickly, and the conservative ethos of the city means you'll likely need a while before you get anywhere.
How to Get There
Zakarpattia is physically isolated from the rest of Ukraine. Ever since Motor Sich Airlines canceled their Kiev-Uzhhorod route two years ago, the oblast has no regularly scheduled air service, so the only way in is by car, bus, or train. Because Mukachevo is on the far side of the Carpathian Mountains and because the Ukrainian government has neglected the infrastructure in Zakarpattia, traveling there by train takes forever. Expect to spend 12+ hours if you go by train from Kiev or points east.
The fastest way to get to Mukachevo if you're not already in Ukraine is to fly to Budapest and take the train from there. You can also fly to Lviv since the airport there has some international connections. Mukachevo is on the main train line between Budapest and Lviv and is about midway between the two cities. If you're coming from Budapest, use this post I wrote to plan your itinerary since getting direct train connections between Hungary and Ukraine is difficult (just change the final leg of the journey from Chop -> Lviv to Chop -> Mukachevo): https://mattforney.com/travel-budapest-lviv-train/
Coming from Budapest will cost about $30-40.
If you're coming from Lviv, there are a number of direct trains to Mukachevo. Expect to ride on either a dirty Brezhnev-era train with a squat toilet or a sleeper train. Get a first class ticket if possible so you don't have to be stuck around Gypsies and low-class Ukrainians groping their Hungarian girlfriends. You'll probably pay about $5-10.
Mukachevo is close to the other two major cities in Zakarpattia, Uzhhorod and Berehovo, so you can hop over there for day trips if you get bored. There are frequent trains from Mukachevo to Uzhhorod, as well as marshrutkas. To get to Berehovo, you'll have to use a marshrutka since the only train that goes there is a sleeper from Lviv that leaves in the very early morning and also goes out of the way to Chop (it's targeted at people going to/from Romania and Hungary). The cities are also close enough that you could probably pay a taxi driver to get you there too.
Logistics
Try and stay near the Mukachevo Town Hall/Myru Square since everything of importance (save for Palanok Castle and the train station) is within a block or two from it. I stayed in a spacious one-bedroom apartment directly across from the Town Hall, with a bunch of restaurants, cafes, 24/7 supermarkets, and a small mall within walking distance. Prices in general are noticeably lower than Lviv and other cities; dinner at a sit-down restaurant will run you maybe $4-5, and I paid only $22 a night for my place (an apartment of the same size in Lviv would run at least twice as much, likely more in the summer).
There are buses/marshrutkas available, as well as taxis, but the city is small enough that you can pretty much walk everywhere. There seems to be some crime---I was walking along a side street in the afternoon and saw a dude who'd been fucked up in a fight, because he was walking with a limp and his face was covered in blood---as well as a small Gypsy population, but stick to Myru Square after dark and you'll be fine.
I wasn't warned against drinking the tap water, but I bought bottled water just to be safe. This is Ukraine, after all.
What to Do
As I mentioned above, Palanok Castle is really the only thing Mukachevo has to offer for tourists: no museums, nothing else. It's a bit of a hike from Myru Square---about 45 minutes, including walking uphill---but worth the trip. The entrance fee is ₴40 (about $1.50) and much of the castle is open to the public. The castle is in varying states of disrepair---for example, the courtyard has been newly repainted, but the Western Bastion is falling apart---but it's still really cool if you like castles.
There are tours of Palanok Castle available, but only in Ukrainian, and a fair amount of the castle's information is only in Ukrainian or Hungarian, though the main exhibits (including an exhibit about the life of Ferenc Kazinczy and another about the Rákóczi dynasty) are in English. There's also a restaurant on site, as well as a souvenir shop selling replica medieval armor.
Aside from that, Mukachevo's main sights involve walking around Myru Square and admiring the Town Hall, churches, and other historic Hungarian buildings. Once you get more than two blocks from Myru Square, the crowds disappear, the businesses thin out, and the buildings get more run down. The Latorica River is particularly depressing: it runs through the center of town, but there's zero development on the riverfront and it looks like a swamp. You can't even walk up to the river because it's blocked off by concrete barriers, and the statues are covered in graffiti.
For that matter, while the Myru Square area is (mostly) immaculately maintained, the upper floors of some buildings badly need a paint job. Mukachevo is a perfect example of what Roosh meant in Bang Ukraine when he described Ukraine as a "paint-over culture," with lots of skimping on basic maintenance in favor of short-term solutions.
Where to Go
Mukachevo has no nightlife to speak of. People go to bed early, restaurants and bars close up around 10pm to midnight, and crowds peter out by 9:30. The only restaurants/bars I can recommend are Barry Barr's and Milenium.
Milenium is a riverfront restaurant (or at least as close to the river as the barriers allow) on the far side of the Latorica River. The waiters' English is spotty, but the menus are in English and Hungarian. Food is really good---I had the banosh---and service is fast. It's also easy to get a table on Friday and Saturday nights.
Barry Barr's is an Irish pub on Yaroslava Mudroho Street. The food is pretty good and the waiters have good English. Menus are also in English. It gets packed on Saturdays.
There are a number of smaller cafes and lunch places around Myru Square, including a Lviv Croissants franchise, as well as plenty of free WiFi spots.
The Girls
Mukachevo girls are not as hot as other Ukrainian girls. While they're still better-looking than the average American girl (not a high bar), they're a full point below girls in Lviv, with shorter, stockier bodies and less attractive faces. Basically, they look like a hybrid of Ukrainians, Hungarians, and Slovaks. The flip side is that they seem to age better than other Ukrainians; I only saw one babushka there, with most older women aging like Hungarians or Slovaks do.
There's also a shocking number of fatties, with local girls packing more pounds than you'd think a Ukrainian girl is legally allowed to have. Girls here don't dress as well as other Ukrainians, with fewer heels, dresses, and less makeup. The hottest girl I talked to was a Slovak. English fluency is spottier than Lviv; only half of the girls I spoke to were fluent enough to have a conversation with me.
The upside is that due to a lack of English-speaking tourists (most tourists are Czechs, Slovaks, or Hungarians, with a few Poles), if you're American, people will immediately take an interest in you. Most of the girls I talked to (the ones who could speak English, anyway) were curious as to what an American was doing in Mukachevo. I even had a couple at a convenience store chat me up so they could practice their English. That's never happened to me anywhere else in Ukraine. Best of all: no Turks. The city in general has a friendly, relaxed vibe similar to Lviv.
Given Mukachevo's small size, the city has a village-like atmosphere where everyone knows each other. You'd need a significant amount of time here (and some fluency in Ukrainian) to get anywhere with girls, and you might also be hobbled by your foreigner status in some respects.
Where to Meet Girls
It's day game in Mukachevo or bust, unless you can insert yourself into a social circle. Myru Square and the surrounding streets are the only places with crowds thick enough for there to be girls to approach. There's also a bit of action on the other side of the Latorica River (near Milenium) and at Daily (Щодня), the mall I mentioned earlier. As I mentioned earlier, though, the small population means you will run out of targets quickly.
There are some cute tourist girls in and around Palanok Castle, but going to Ukraine to bang Hungarians or Slovaks is like going to KFC for the coleslaw.
Final Thoughts
Mukachevo reminds me of small college towns like Ames, Iowa or Ithaca, New York in that it's small, friendly, and doesn't have much to do. I enjoyed my visit, but that's in part because my expectations for it weren't too high, and I don't feel the need to come back. While Mukachevo may not be inundated with English-speaking foreigners or Turkish sex tourists, its small population and spotty levels of English are big hurdles, and there's a general lack of things to do and places to go.
According to WeekendCasanova, Uzhhorod might be a better place to go because it's slightly larger (about 110,000) and also has a university, so there are more girls to talk to. I haven't been there so I can't really say, but I'm guessing the girls probably look similar to the ones in Mukachevo: thread-66224.html
I'd thought about taking a day trip to Berehovo, but I doubt the talent is better there, either: Berehovo is an ethnic Hungarian city (it's the center of the Hungarian minority in Ukraine).
In short, Mukachevo is really only worth visiting if you're in Budapest, Lviv, or Košice, since it's not far from all three cities. If you're taking the train between Lviv and Budapest, Mukachevo is a good place to stop since it's midway between both cities (the train trip is about twelve hours). Palanok Castle is definitely worth a visit if you like castles, but the city doesn't have much to offer beyond that. I wouldn't go out of my way to come here if I lived elsewhere in Ukraine or were coming from abroad.
![[Image: 41vTfuNRs2L._SX331_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg]](https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/41vTfuNRs2L._SX331_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg)
