[alphacentauri]

I met this Korean girl in the US over 5 years ago, back during my very inexperienced beta days, and we went on two dates with pretty much no action before she had to return to Korea. We've kept in touch occasionally over the years, and recently she expressed interest in visiting me in Japan and traveling around the country a bit together. These days I have no interest or motivation to plan and execute typical tourist trips, so I figured having her do most of the work and have a travel buddy would be a good fit for me. And of course, I want to get something more out of it — and she may feel the same way too.

In total, we'll be together here for about 10 days, splitting travel costs evenly. She'll be staying with me at my place (I live alone in a studio apartment), and we'll be staying in Airbnbs in other parts of the country. I asked her to research Airbnbs and give me her preferred places; some of the places she liked had two beds, which I figured were good for us both due to easy plausible deniability, but the places she liked the most (and that we ultimately booked) only have one double bed that we'll share. Interesting.

Most of our conversations the past few weeks have been about the trip, with some unrelated banter thrown in and mild flirting. I have avoided being too overtly sexual because I don't want to scare her off: she was a typical innocent Asian girl when I knew her many years ago, though maybe that's changed. I recall her mentioning a boyfriend that didn't last long, but I don't know anything else about her relationship or sexual history. She knows that I was in a long-term relationship over the past several years and that I broke up with my girlfriend earlier this year.

Regarding strategy, the main things I have in mind are not to be too aggressive and to make certain not to show any disappointment at failure; time is on my side since every night is an opportunity, and a huge fuck-up could ruin the enjoyment of the trip for both of us. But at the same time, I have to counter the friend-zoned vibe I gave off when we spent time together many years ago. It's a tricky situation for me, and I'd like some tips about how to best handle this situation. Thanks in advance.

[MongolianAbroad]

If you don't get laid, this will be epic.

5 years in the friend zone, plus a possible 10 day vacation with just the two of you on top of that...

That would have to be some kind of record if you don't get laid.

No pressure.

[Dulceácido]

Sounds like you're pretty grounded, Bro. Just go with what you're doing. The only flaw I see is you agreeing to it to begin with (could've been a mistake, maybe not), but seems you can't take that back now. Roll with what you know.

I think you have a solid plan. Don't be too needy. Almost seems like you friend-zoned yourself, but like you said, plenty of opportunities and the fact she chose all single beds... Seems like you're okay.

[Montrose]

I hate these situations. What I would do: use the first three days to build maximum comfort, be very kind (but not weak), and not explicitly sexual at all - and make a move late at night on day 3 after a good dinner. The move should feel spontaneous and natural. Be gracious if you fail cause you have no way out!

[Winston Wolfe]

She came all the way to see you, which obviously means she likes you. If her intentions are not clear yet from your text exchange, now is the time to find out. Not later in the trip.

Is she here for an epic fuck trip or are you her convenient bitch in the friendzone?

Plan of action:

Go pick her up at the airport and escalate right from the start, but don't force it.

- Hug and kiss on the cheek when she arrives
- Small talk while your hand rests on her lower back
- Take her hand, lead into cab
- Put your arm around her when in the cab. Ideally, her head rests on your shoulder and your hand is on her hip / ass. If that doesn't work, at the very least have her sit close to you while you play with her hands / rest your hand on her leg / etc.
- Small talk until cab arrives at your place. By now she should be comfortable with you and, more improtantly, you touching her
- Let her get comfortable at your place and fresh up a bit / do her thing
- Escalate into bedroom
- Bang
- Bang more during the trip

Escalate and let there be no doubt about your intentions. Do NOT talk about what you're doing, just do it.

If she resists or gives you shit about it, don't apologize. Just tone it down a bit and ramp it up again later. She will not resent you for making your intentions clear; quite the contrary, women respect that.

This can of course backfire if it's too far off the already existing frame between you. Experience is also a factor, the escalation has to flow naturally and be part of who you are, so to speak. Remember, women want things to "just happen".

At the very least, you'll have your answers right away. This puts her into the position where she has to show her hand early on. If she really isn't having it and won't put out, you can always bail and let her enjoy her trip alone. She'll think you're an asshole; so be it. You're not there to entertain her for 10 days.

Or are you OK with paying for half her trip and then jerking off in the bathroom every night?

Good luck and we're rooting for you here

[Lunostrelki]

Depending on how conservative and/or into you she is, I'd actually suggest taking things more normally. An Asian woman who considers herself a "good girl" could easily get repelled if you get too physical too fast, even if she likes you. You don't have to get super intimate with her in order to show romantic value. I went a month without kissing or touching my wife (Chinese) after our first date but kept building attraction just by keeping things natural and leading the dynamic. But of course it depends on the individual girl and what you're looking for here.

[Winston Wolfe]

(02-23-2018 09:55 AM)Lunostrelki Wrote:  

Depending on how conservative and/or into you she is, I'd actually suggest taking things more normally. An Asian woman who considers herself a "good girl" could easily get repelled if you get too physical too fast, even if she likes you. You don't have to get super intimate with her in order to show romantic value. I went a month without kissing or touching my wife (Chinese) after our first date but kept building attraction just by keeping things natural and leading the dynamic. But of course it depends on the individual girl and what you're looking for here.

Yep, important factor I overlooked.

[birthday cat]

My take on this is try to get more experience so you don't have to get into these situations but make the best out of this situation obviously.

A girl might get cold feet with something like this. If you need to pay for accommodations beforehand then I suggest getting her to make some of those payments.

The most likely scenario is that her selecting the one bed apartments is her way of saying she is DTF. There is a small chance she is clueless or a psycho who is trying to string you along.

I think she is DTF so I would be relaxed and not too aggressive just like you said. Escalate slowly in the beginning but definitely escalate. Hug her, guide her with your hand on the small of her back, touch her arms and hands, etc. If you can't escalate much by the end of the second day then you have a problem.

When does the trip happen? I hope you keep us updated.

[arsenal2000]

I would suggest instead of being focused only on her keep interaction with other girls as well this would make it more relaxing and not depend on just the interactions with her. If it turns out she is not interested just friend zone and use her for social proof to interact with other girls during the trip.

[treypound]

I hope this works out but that is a long time (too long for me) in the friend zone. I can't see how she can look at you subjectively as anything more than "friend".

[alphacentauri]

The trip ended a few days ago. It started off on the wrong foot because unfortunately she got her period the morning before she flew over, and on top of that felt quite sick her first day here. I gave her some space for a few days until we were out of the city, then I started making moves on her as her period was finishing. She offered little resistance, but I learned that she was a virgin due to fear of the pain (even her longest boyfriend of 1 year couldn't crack her), so after a long conversation of comfort, assuaging her fears, and reassuring her of my de-flowering experience (from my last LTR), we spent the remaining nights together going from slow fucking to fucking like mad squirrels the final two nights.

So, I get the impression from her story — and her profuse gratitude after the fact — that she wanted me to cure her of her virginity disease, and thus I did my manly duty and made it so. I will be visiting Korea in a month and will see her again, but I also plan on finding new tail once I get there.

In all, it worked out, but regardless, it was a bad idea to travel with a girl I haven't fucked yet. I made the decision to travel with her when I was a bit depressed earlier this year, and even though I got out of it and have been feeling great, I couldn't just abandon our plans to travel together since she did nothing wrong. Anyway, a good learning experience overall. Thanks again for the tips and for reading.

[Suits]

Well done, OP.

[RatInTheWoods]

Gratz. Hand selected to pop the cherry!

[WomenLuvDeez]

I just tried traveling in Europe with a girl I met.. You will highly regret it ESPECIALLY if you aren't even fucking. Good luck m8

[Suits]

(04-28-2018 08:55 AM)WomenLuvDeez Wrote:  

I just tried traveling in Europe with a girl I met.. You will highly regret it ESPECIALLY if you aren't even fucking. Good luck m8

You didn't read the thread, did you?