[Buffandtan]

ok so im almost 25 and am extremely inexperienced with girls relative for my age. only had 2 ONS in my life and was via online dating/hook-up websites.

ive never properly dated, ive barely even so much as kissed a girl, let alone ceremoniously dated and had a relationship.

when I was in my teens I suffered from severe depression, I eventually overcame that but in my early 20s I have monumental self-esteem issues. so I rarely, if ever, put my self out there and actively pursue women.

I need all the advice on game/girls I can get. I'm literally starting from the very, very beginning, like a clueless teen boy.

Ive been working on self-improvement and now feel im in a good place and ready. I workout regularly for years and have a good physique (moderate-high muscle mass) and I have a sharp, angular face.

I regularly get checked-out/eye-phucked by women and IOI but im too passive and shy to break out of my comfort barrier.

my biggest issue is I feel they will lose respect/interest in me when they realise how inexperienced I am for my age, so I don't do anything and the situation exacerbates itself.

any general and specific dating/game/women advice would be highly appreciated.

there are several girls at my gym who often give my IOI (not a guarantee I know) and I feel this would be a good starting point.

[The Alpha Virgin]

I was a late bloomer too.

I guess there are multiple ways you could go about it but I'm only gonna speak for myself and tell you what worked for me.

I'm not good at explaining stuff but the thing that helped me the most was going out alone to night clubs etc, it was absolutely frightening at first but I also realised that it was fun cause I could pretend to be whoever I wanted to.

I would basically play an actor and when I got rejected by girls my ego wouldn't get that much of a hit. I would pretend to be some hyper alpha guy like Tyler Durden from Fight Club and it wen't surprisingly well and I got a boost out of starting the nights off with being suited up in a strip club where the strippers thought I was some rich player, going to night clubs and making out with several different girls and being close to find a girl I could seal the deal with.

In the begininng I would often come off as a complete douche and a tryhard, but over time I became better to calibrate and "just be myself", instead of having to put on some sort of night club alpha persona just to get laid. I sort of pretended like I was the alpha women were looking for and many girls were too dumb (or drunk) to be able to spot the difference, so perception is reality.

So I believe in fake it til you make it, actually. And if you got a decent physique, I'd suggest to hit the night clubs while at the same time educating yourself a bit about game (and specifically that around night clubs). Theory, practice and effort will make a transformation.

If your biggest issue is that you feel like they will lose respect/interest when they realise how inexperienced you are (which are just self-limiting beliefs), then my advice would be to just play a good actor and act as if you're a player and banged 1000 of girls. Try not to walk around and think about that (even though that voice will probably always be in your head until you get a couple of lays), instead pretend even in your own head you're already G Manifesto.

You can actually be honest and say "I've only had sex twice" and pretty much no girl will believe you anyway cause that's usually just something a guy who had banged loads of broads would have the balls to joke about.

Do like the actors when they get into a role. Look at guys who are players (in your own life or movies) and try emulate them.

Over time that will come natural to you too as you get more experience and learn how to calibrate and you realise that your worth as a person really got nothing to do with how bad/good you are to get your dick wet with sluts.

[Chiosboy90]

I feel your struggle cause I started from a bad position as well.
Like you, I had depression in my teens and when others started to date and going parties and stuff, I was at home playing video games.

You are already going to the GYM which is a very good task to do against depression and overall for your happines.

What I would suggest is to find a nice cute girl for an LTR.
Banging hoes from Tinder isn't that much fun if you start out.

I also had self-esteem issues about "not experience" enough and honestly, it didn't really matter. If you bang a girl from Tinder, she will have a lot of dicks before you and will maybe "feel" that you are a bit inexperienced but sex isn't rocket science. You can practice Sex again with a girl in a relationship.

I would suggest finding a girl with none or just a few sexual experiences (church girls, traditional girls) and you can straightforward tell your story. Nothing to be ashamed. With girls that had experiences, I would just tell them (if they ask) you had just a few experiences with women and couldn't get in a relationship cause "not the right women came to my life" blah blah.

And pls do not approach in your GYM. If the girl comes straight to you and talks with you, go for it but I feel your GYM is a place you really like and why fuck this up just for a woman? Plenty of girls outside.

[Remington]

(01-08-2018 06:05 AM)Buffandtan Wrote:  

when I was in my teens I suffered from severe depression, I eventually overcame that but in my early 20s I have monumental self-esteem issues. so I rarely, if ever, put my self out there and actively pursue women.

I regularly get checked-out/eye-phucked by women and IOI but im too passive and shy to break out of my comfort barrier.

my biggest issue is I feel they will lose respect/interest in me when they realise how inexperienced I am for my age, so I don't do anything and the situation exacerbates itself.

Everything I highlighted is good news for you. It's good in that all of this can be fixed with an mentally. It won't happen over night, but once you finally start conquering your anxiety and fear of approaching, everything will fall into place.

If you are worried about women thinking you're experienced, and it hinders your ability to talk to women, you're in a Catch 22. If you want to gain more experience with women, you need to put yourself out there, but, if you want to put yourself out there, you want the experience necessary to do so.

Every one of us on this forum started from the beginning, regardless of age. We have all had successes and failures.

If there is one thing you will immediately learn from game; it's failure. When I started out, I got blown out of the water many times to where my self esteem was dog shit by the end of the evening.

Once you approach a bunch of times, that fear of rejection goes away and you'll end up not caring if a woman ignores or refuses to talk to you.

Like I said, this won't happen over night. You need to put in the work if you want to be successful.

You're already on your way regarding your inner game. Keep that up as the gym will give you that extra confidence. You are getting the IOI's you want, now you need to put the effort forward and put yourself out there. Next time, if you see that IOI, walk up to that woman and introduce yourself or whatever comes to mind.

Learn from trial and error. It is the only thing that will help you grow.

You're still very young. You'll be fine. Read the forum, ask questions, provide your insights, tell your stories about your approaches/dates/bangs. This is a very solid group of like minded men. Take advantage of it.

[S3K2]

Read roosh's 2 books bang and daybang.
Than read the modern man. Than read mark mansions models. Thats should get you going in the right direction. Approuch woman while rrading the books. Put yourself in uncomfortable situations with women. Understand rejection is a good thing because it teachers you about yourself and what u can approve on. Most of all, enjoy the chase!

[Kahler]

(01-08-2018 07:42 AM)Chiosboy90 Wrote:  

What I would suggest is to find a nice cute girl for an LTR.
Banging hoes from Tinder isn't that much fun if you start out.

I also had self-esteem issues about "not experience" enough and honestly, it didn't really matter. If you bang a girl from Tinder, she will have a lot of dicks before you and will maybe "feel" that you are a bit inexperienced but sex isn't rocket science. You can practice Sex again with a girl in a relationship.

I would suggest finding a girl with none or just a few sexual experiences (church girls, traditional girls) and you can straightforward tell your story. Nothing to be ashamed. With girls that had experiences, I would just tell them (if they ask) you had just a few experiences with women and couldn't get in a relationship cause "not the right women came to my life" blah blah.

And pls do not approach in your GYM. If the girl comes straight to you and talks with you, go for it but I feel your GYM is a place you really like and why fuck this up just for a woman? Plenty of girls outside.

Well I would have contrary advice: if you are unexperienced you shouldn't try to get in LTR. Maybe you will get quality girl, maybe not, but sooner or later you will want to check whether grass is greener somewhere else. Why break girl's heart when you can try tinder, especially if you are attractive.

[Buffandtan]

(01-14-2018 05:57 AM)Kahler Wrote:  

(01-08-2018 07:42 AM)Chiosboy90 Wrote:  

What I would suggest is to find a nice cute girl for an LTR.
Banging hoes from Tinder isn't that much fun if you start out.

I also had self-esteem issues about "not experience" enough and honestly, it didn't really matter. If you bang a girl from Tinder, she will have a lot of dicks before you and will maybe "feel" that you are a bit inexperienced but sex isn't rocket science. You can practice Sex again with a girl in a relationship.

I would suggest finding a girl with none or just a few sexual experiences (church girls, traditional girls) and you can straightforward tell your story. Nothing to be ashamed. With girls that had experiences, I would just tell them (if they ask) you had just a few experiences with women and couldn't get in a relationship cause "not the right women came to my life" blah blah.

And pls do not approach in your GYM. If the girl comes straight to you and talks with you, go for it but I feel your GYM is a place you really like and why fuck this up just for a woman? Plenty of girls outside.

Well I would have contrary advice: if you are unexperienced you shouldn't try to get in LTR. Maybe you will get quality girl, maybe not, but sooner or later you will want to check whether grass is greener somewhere else. Why break girl's heart when you can try tinder, especially if you are attractive.

Each to their own but personally I think online dating is a waste of time for the most part. I'd rather meet women in real life as this will force me to sharpen my communication skills and game which is the underlying problem.

[Sonoma]

One hint- no girl ever needs to know anything about your sexual history, ever.

[Fightersword]

OP, it seems mainly like you need a good confidence boost to get you approaching. There's tons of write ups about developing self confidence for game and for other reasons, and I"d encourage you to find a gym or take up some other exercise program to make you happier and more confident.

All that being said, if you really need a springboard to get past your self doubt and move on to approaching, I can recommend a few things you can do that might help you out.

The first is, if you're really weak socially like I was for a very long time, just start talking to people. No flirting, no romantic pressure, just get used to striking up conversations with strangers you meet in the day to day. While this doesn't directly impact approach anxiety, if you have anxiety in social situations in general this will help you get past that. You'll probably even make a few friends doing this.

More specifically for approach anxiety, I encourage you to do the following. Sit down with a pen and paper (or a document on your PC, whichever you prefer), and just let your imagination run wild. Think through all the negative things that could happen to you when you approach a girl, and no matter how ridiculous or trivial they are, write them all down. Then head off and do something else for a little while, and come back and read through the list. What you'll find is that almost everything on the list will either be so ridiculous it's laughable, or so trivial that there's no reason to worry about it in the first place. Then take the time to reflect on all the good that can come out of it, and recognize that the possible good far outweighs the possible bad. This should help you springboard yourself into make a few intiial approaches, that will hopefully lead to more and more as you get more used to it.

[Buffandtan]

(01-17-2018 12:39 PM)Sonoma Wrote:  

One hint- no girl ever needs to know anything about your sexual history, ever.

I agree but when having sex my inexperience will speak for itself.

[H1N1]

You seem quite hung up on being inexperienced. Here are a few thoughts:

1. My impression is that the vast majority of guys are not particularly good lays. Get a girl talking honestly about sex and the chances are that most of the men she's been with, and most of the sex she has had, has failed to live up to her fantasies. I'm sure you feel very alone with your inexperience, but the truth is most guys walking around around you who may be getting more sex are not necessarily operating at a particularly high level sexually. Most girls, and that includes the beautiful ones and the promiscuous ones, are not especially sexually satisfied. The bar has not been set very high, and you shouldn't be intimidated into abstinence.

2. A lot of girls are sexually insecure, even the ones who will take you home on the first night. A lot of girls love sex, but worry that they are not very good at it. They fail to understand that all they need to do to be good at sex is to be the most desirable object they can be. All the pornstar techniques in the world are secondary to the value her holes, the lines of her body, and her unblemished skin can give you.

3. The upshot of this is that to be a good lay all you have to do is enjoy her for the object she is. You should do this without shame, embarrassment or reservation. When you are with a girl, have her however you want to have her. Use her for all she has to offer to you, and in every way that presents itself to your mind. Really enjoy the experience of fucking her without concerning yourself whether your technique is good, or your dick is big enough, or any of the other nonsense or ego that men are consumed with. Really focus on how good her pussy feels around your cock, how good her tits feel in your hands, the smoothness of her belly, the softness of her thighs etc etc. Communicate your desire to her whilst you fuck her too, and again, there's no need to be shy. If you really love fucking her a girl will always think you're a good lay, even if your techniques have room for improvement.

4. Do not worry about cumming too quickly either. If it happens as a result of you really giving yourself over to the experience and relishing every inch of her body and just being consumed with her sexuality then I guarantee no girl is going to give you any shit for it whatsoever. Really enjoy it for what it is, don't allow psychology to detract from those moments of pure pleasure, or dull the anticipation and subsequent appreciation of her body, and you will be a memorable lay for all the right reasons.

5. In the absence of techniques of your own, a short cut to being a great lay is simply to encourage girls to play with themselves whilst you fuck them, or whilst they blow you. Give them the freedom and confidence to rub their pussies whilst you're inside one hole or another, and the girl will attribute her intense pleasure and satisfaction to you, even if she is doing a share of the work herself.