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Compliment Opener
#1

Compliment Opener

This is kind of a movie cliche, though I've not really seen it discussed here in any light. How effective is going up to a girl and simply saying "nice _____"

A lot of what we read here tells us to avoid complimenting women, this has kept me from using this opener (something I regret now) when it would've been pretty applicable.

At least once a week I'm in a situation where I see a girl by herself but nothing jumps out, situationally, to make an approach, though she might be wearing something that makes her stand out, this is the type of situation I'm curious about.

Chef In Jeans
A culinary website for men
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#2

Compliment Opener

Compliment, then introduce myself. Works well for me.

"You're beautiful. I'm mofo."
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#3

Compliment Opener

Introduce yourself. Chat a little bit. Then compliment something about her.

"I like your hair, earrings, nails, outfit...etc."

Team Nachos
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#4

Compliment Opener

Its also worth saying that the only time I'd use this would be during the day (sorry to Roosh if this is actually covered in Day Bang already)

Chef In Jeans
A culinary website for men
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#5

Compliment Opener

Chad Daring -

The "Compliment Opener" is a million times better than "No Opener".

So yeah keep doing it.

It is not the greatest thing in the world, but if you Game is tight, it really isn't going to hurt you that much if at all.

If you want to mix it up (and I am not talking about MixxTVOnline either, or maybe I am), say (with the proper tone) "Where did you get that _______?"
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#6

Compliment Opener

For my openers I use the Excuse-Pacing-Opener-Question structure. So a compliment opener goes like this (when, for example, I see a well-dressed chick with mediterranean features walking down the street):


"Excuse me, I know it's random, but... your dress is very elegant. Are you from Italy?"


When you end it with a question, that triggers an automatical response and therefore reduces the danger of an arkward moment of silence which could make her come up with a boyfriend objection due to social pressure or just walking away because of being confronted with an unusual situation.


Fieldtested many times.
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#7

Compliment Opener

Mighty Mouse -

Good one.

I have said many times on her before that Strong Game is usually in the Statement - Statement - Question format.

The "the Excuse-Pacing-Opener-Question" format is great for opening.
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#8

Compliment Opener

Stating it as a question was what I was missing. I knew simply blurting out a compliment wasn't quite right, but turning it into a question so not only is she going to respond but it frames the interaction so she's immediately qualifying herself to you.

Chef In Jeans
A culinary website for men
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#9

Compliment Opener

Quote: (09-13-2011 05:07 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

The "the Excuse-Pacing-Opener-Question" format is great for opening.

Thanks.

I use it for all kind of openers - direct, indirect, compliment, etc.

This is the reason why:

Whatever some guys might say, approaching girls on the street is unusual and confronts the girl with social pressure. Often an immediate rejection is the result of this social pressure.

So what can we do? Keep the social pressure on the girl as low as possible by behaving as socially intelligent as possible.

The 4 elements:

1) Most people react friendly to a strangers' "Excuse me..."

2) The pacing statement shows that you are aware of the social pressure situation, and therefore you're a "normal", socially calibrated guy and not a creep/fool/drunkhead.

3) The opener itself.

4) The question (I've explained the function above).

And you already have a topic to talk about (in my example, her origin: Italy?) which makes the transition away from the opener easier.
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#10

Compliment Opener

My day game is based largely on "compliment openers." Never compliment her looks, though.

My classic one is, "I like your boots." Chicks are really into their shoes, and if a girl has some stylish boots, she based her entire outfit on them.

Usually she'll thank you, and then go with, "So where can I get a pair like that?" If she's game, she'll laugh and say something about how those boots wouldn't look right on you. Etc.
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#11

Compliment Opener

I don't have much approach anxiety anymore but I'm still struggling with the approach. My problem is that I'm a pretty talkative person and I've always expected women to be as talkative and trusting as myself.

My default approach might be something like "nice shoes" and her reply will be a simple "Thanks." She'll walk away and I'll wonder what happened. Only a few minutes later do I realize that I didn't give her anything to work with. I've got to get my default lines to change.

I think Mighty Mouse is dead on. You need to frame yourself as a normal guy who understands social norms and then ask her a question that pries her open and gets her engaged. A simple compliment is effective conversation material but it's not sufficient.
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#12

Compliment Opener

Quote: (09-13-2011 06:06 PM)CupCake Wrote:  

My default approach might be something like "nice shoes" and her reply will be a simple "Thanks." She'll walk away ... [because] ... I didn't give her anything to work with.

Mighty Mouse's question follow-up is good. Alternatively, maybe try an open-ended follow-up?

"Nice shoes."
"Thanks."
"So tell me about what shoes you like."

or

"You don't seem like the sort to wear those all the time. Tell me about yourself."

Anyway, the opener seems fine. You just need more follow-up. If she is receptive, but shy, she will smile and gaze downwards, giving you the opportunity to continue. If she is not interested and walks away then you have done everything possible.

Kudos for inventing and using a decent opener. Now get some decent follow-up.
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#13

Compliment Opener

Quote: (09-13-2011 05:23 PM)Mighty Mouse Wrote:  

Quote: (09-13-2011 05:07 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

The "the Excuse-Pacing-Opener-Question" format is great for opening.

Thanks.

I use it for all kind of openers - direct, indirect, compliment, etc.

This is the reason why:

Whatever some guys might say, approaching girls on the street is unusual and confronts the girl with social pressure. Often an immediate rejection is the result of this social pressure.

So what can we do? Keep the social pressure on the girl as low as possible by behaving as socially intelligent as possible.

The 4 elements:

1) Most people react friendly to a strangers' "Excuse me..."

2) The pacing statement shows that you are aware of the social pressure situation, and therefore you're a "normal", socially calibrated guy and not a creep/fool/drunkhead.

3) The opener itself.

4) The question (I've explained the function above).

And you already have a topic to talk about (in my example, her origin: Italy?) which makes the transition away from the opener easier.

How would you use this technique in a direct opener situation?
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#14

Compliment Opener

I've found mixing enthusiasm with a direct opener seems to be the best effective way to do that.
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#15

Compliment Opener

Quote: (09-13-2011 04:15 PM)Chad Daring Wrote:  

How effective is going up to a girl and simply saying "nice _____"

I had some success with this line last week...

Girl #1: Walking thru a college campus, I saw a girl wearing some tight pants with little openings along the outer thigh, very sexy, young latina..

me: nice pants, those are hot
girl: oh, thanks
me: those make me wanna have a drink and go dancing or something
girl: haha
me: you must not be from around here?
girl: I'm from LA
me: I could tell, girls around here don't know how to dress
her: I noticed that
me: how long you been up here?
her: blah,blah, blah
me: blah, blah, blah

We walked and talked for about 2 blocks. She kept giggling, which I like. I
asked for her number and she gave it to me. We texted for about a week and half. I got her bra off on the first date.


Girl #2: I posted this in the "Fake Phone Call Move" thread. I combined your opener with a "Customized Fake Phone Call".

Me: Cool bag, is that from Peru?
Her: Hah, it looks like that doesn't it? But I got it in Alabama
Me: What? Alabama?! I was thinking more like South America or something
Her: I know, my aunt got it for me. Hey what language were you just speaking?
Me: Oh thats Portuguese. From Brazil.
Her: I was wondering were that was from. It sounds cool
Me: Do you speak any other languages?
Her: No, just English, but I'm practicing my Italian.
Me: Portuguese is the cousin of Italian.
Her: Are you Brazilian?
Me: Ya (not true), how bout you?
Her: German and Italian

Blah Blah Blah. I knew she was feeling me because she was giving me good eye contact, smiling, laughing, and asking me personal questions.

Her: It was so nice chatting with you
Me: Ya, you too, why don't you give me your number and we can get a drink or something sometime.
Her: Ya, I'd be down for that.

Handed her my phone.

This is an old fashioned opener. It gets the job done I guess. Its what you say after this that will determine everything.

Like G said, its a trillion times better then no opener.
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#16

Compliment Opener

Quote: (09-13-2011 06:39 PM)Sketness Wrote:  

Quote: (09-13-2011 05:23 PM)Mighty Mouse Wrote:  

Quote: (09-13-2011 05:07 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

The "the Excuse-Pacing-Opener-Question" format is great for opening.

Thanks.

I use it for all kind of openers - direct, indirect, compliment, etc.

This is the reason why:

Whatever some guys might say, approaching girls on the street is unusual and confronts the girl with social pressure. Often an immediate rejection is the result of this social pressure.

So what can we do? Keep the social pressure on the girl as low as possible by behaving as socially intelligent as possible.

The 4 elements:

1) Most people react friendly to a strangers' "Excuse me..."

2) The pacing statement shows that you are aware of the social pressure situation, and therefore you're a "normal", socially calibrated guy and not a creep/fool/drunkhead.

3) The opener itself.

4) The question (I've explained the function above).

And you already have a topic to talk about (in my example, her origin: Italy?) which makes the transition away from the opener easier.

How would you use this technique in a direct opener situation?

Taking the same example as above...

In a direct opener situation:

"Excuse me, I know this is unusual, but... I would like to get to know you. Are you Italian?"

In an indirect opener situation:

"Excuse me, I know it's random, but... you're from Italy! Are you?"

Just had an instant date with a cute brunette with the last one. Doesn't matter if she's from somewhere else. With the guess where she's from it's easy to find a lot of interesting topics to talk about (her origin, your origin, travelling experiences, etc.)
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#17

Compliment Opener

Being opinionated will get you further than being nice. Semantics, yes, point is it's creating a more dominance, which is what she'll be interested in more than the words/questions. Remove any excuse preface... excuse me, may I ask you.. etc. I just say what I think, I don't ask for her permission/attention. Asking a question is not being dominate - you're ASKING for something.
Girls will answer statements as though they were questions by confirming or denying. Try not asking them anything. Always ask less than they do and certainly not the first.
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#18

Compliment Opener

its all about check and balance.....dont compliment her too much that she will think you are a creeper.

same like this....dont neg her too much .

just use mix of stuff......and make her think that if she does something good....she will get compliment.

e.g she smiled on your some sentence....there you can compliment ''nice smile''
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#19

Compliment Opener

Contrary to others above, I use the compliment opener not in day game (which I hardly practice anyway) but in night game.
Best to use it on chicks who are not the hottest ones in the place - compliments are not so frequently lavished upon them, and are therefore more appreciated.
Standard part of direct game. Makes your intentions known right away. Limitations of direct game also apply, though (such as forcing her to make up her mind about you right away).
All in all, good for chicks who you wouldn't mind fucking, but don't want to expend a lot of effort in achieving that. Drop the opener, gauge her reaction, if favorable - escalate quickly.
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#20

Compliment Opener

You're adorable, we should exchange orgasms.
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#21

Compliment Opener

Mighty mouse I love it man! Might be hard with all these jean and t shirt girls though lol.
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#22

Compliment Opener

Seems like a big part of making this work is A) keeping the convo going with a question and/or B) breaking into some humor, I like Gio's approach the best so far. Blunt simple compliment that was immediately turned into humor.

Chef In Jeans
A culinary website for men
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#23

Compliment Opener

The more I learn about game, the more I firmly believe the opener really doesn't matter. It's what you say shortly after the opener that counts. Christ, some guys have gotten laid using the opener, "Want to fuck?" I think there was a thread posted on this site about that.
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#24

Compliment Opener

Guess: Effectiveness of ingratiating politeness like "Excuse me" as opener is positively correlated with level of target social class.

There's a balance between (a) Showing social intelligence (b) not being too servile.

Since I really am only interested in middle class and up, (a) is a higher priority.
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#25

Compliment Opener

Quote: (09-15-2011 12:44 AM)iknowexactly Wrote:  

Guess: Effectiveness of ingratiating politeness like "Excuse me" as opener is positively correlated with level of target social class.

There's a balance between (a) Showing social intelligence (b) not being too servile.

Since I really am only interested in middle class and up, (a) is a higher priority.

Good that you mention that, because I forgot it.

My openers (like all aspects of my game) are tailor-made for middle/upper class girls with an average to high level of education.

If I would target another female demographic I would probably use a completely different style of game (including different openers).

Btw. the poster above who said that the transition away from the opener is more important than the opener itself, is right.
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