[duedue]

As a foreigner from a poor background I think I should be glad that I have a job here that pays me almost twice of an average American. But....unfortunately...I'm not. There are several reasons: an office job that doesn't involve much interaction with others, living in a small conservative town in the middle of nowhere, the women and also memories from Europe. Manosphere writers are to blame too, the most notorious one being Relampago Furioso.

If I had a viable alternative I would've already be gone however there are some factors that make things complicated: my useless passport plus visa requirements make it practically impossible to visit a new place before jumping ship. My job also is in STEM (research involving math, programming and statistics) which is great but only first world countries have well paying jobs in that area. I can think of two strategies:

1-Setting my STEM skills aside (at least temporarily), moving to a cheap place such as DR, Malaysia or Thailand, investing my savings and starting to hustle. This will force the zoo animal that I am now to become a wild one.

2-Finding a job that would use my skills at a university, bank or other company in Hong Kong, Singapore or Berlin with the last one being my favorite.

Now a very important question: how much of the blame should I put on myself and how much of it on my environment. Truth be told I'm pretty much depressed and have approached everything in a wishy-washy manner: lifting, game, my job (resume, which is now not in a good shape), learning Spanish and so on. A depressed person thinks anything he'd do he'd still be (feel) miserable; he just can't imagine himself not being miserable. (There is a paradox here like in game. A game newbie needs to convey to girls, through his body language, style, teasing etc, that he's good with girls but that's not easy if he has not been good with girls.) He wants some instant gratification to feel better and I'm thinking me wanting to escape may be explained in this light. Or maybe not.

If I stick around in 2-3 years I'll have a green card but I practically can't leave the country and come back till then and then I'll be about 40.

[Zerdame]

What is your nationality that your passport is that useless? Even so, most employers would be taking care of the visa issues if they really do want you.

I am from Singapore and from what I understand about the STEM industry here, you wouldn't be paid much less than you are currently earning but again, Im no expert so you need to know your own research. Why do I recommend Singapore? You pretty much earn a Western standard pay check while being 2 hours and 100 bucks air ticket away from almost all the SEA paradises. All of a sudden, your weekends sound alot more fun don't they?

This is my perspective but you sound like you are miserable and need to get out and fast.

[GreenHills]

Why not move to nyc or some other big city? This way you're still on your green card track and you're in a happening place surrounded by more engaging people.

Small town America coupled with an office job IS depressing. I did it for almost two years a long time ago. It works for some personalities though, I've noticed that people raised in small suburbs don't mind the same as adults.

Definitely pay attention to your depression, because it comes from internal attitudes as well, but your small town office job is a big part of it. Make some move, I've had two times in my life where a seemingly bad depression was quickly lifted by a life change - in one case I started a job that I liked and in another case I quit a job that I hated (without having found a new one).

And yeah, Singapore seems like a good place, I was just there. I think it'll be more interesting than Berlin.

The idea of going to a more third world country is cool too.

[buja]

A US Green Card means that you have to file many US tax forms for all of your activities.

It is really complicated if you are living outside the US.

If you don't want to live in the US for the rest of your life, you should ditch the Green Card.

But whatever you do, do not get US Citizenship.

[GreenHills]

Buja, care to elaborate on citizenship? Getting it is the only way to get a green card for your parents. You can also leave the US for an unlimited period of time. And if you decide that you don't want to be an American, you can probably renounce it.

With a green card you can leave for a year only.

[duedue]

Zerdame, are there any specialized websites for looking for the jobs in Singapore or do Indeed or Glassdoor do the job?

Greenhills, NYC is a great idea too. I'm not sure if Singapore would be more fun than Berlin (the latter seems to be much more liberal although I've not been to Singapore.)

Buja, it's my boss who wants to get me a greencard. I told him I may not stick around for too long and he was OK with it. I second Greenhill's question on citizenship.

[Zerdame]

Job ads websites are shit. Especially since you are probably in a specialized STEM industry. Your best bet would be to google the specific industry and Singapore and cold email the companies you are interested and attaching a CV to your email. It doesn't cost anything and it can be done in under an hour.

Singapore is liberal enough as long as you don't expect "political freedom" like the in US where you can stand on the road and yell "fuck Trump." Then again, as a foreigner, you wouldn't hardly find the need to.

If you do eventually come to Singapore, I would suggest to use the opportunity to do extensive travel in the region. There are so many cultures and girls for you to explore, all at a fraction of the cost back home.

[GreenHills]

I'm on a computer and can quote now.

(10-01-2017 08:16 AM)duedue Wrote:  

As a foreigner from a poor background I think I should be glad that I have a job here that pays me almost twice of an average American. But....unfortunately...I'm not. There are several reasons: an office job that doesn't involve much interaction with others, living in a small conservative town in the middle of nowhere, the women and also memories from Europe.

America is difficult socially. Are you into sports? Do you watch TV series? Can you talk about how you grew up in Kentucky? No? You're in a tough spot at work.

Quote:

If I had a viable alternative I would've already be gone however there are some factors that make things complicated: my useless passport plus visa requirements make it practically impossible to visit a new place before jumping ship.

Ok that sucks that you can't travel to check out a place. I've been to Berlin and Singapore. These are good places. Lots of things are nicer than the US. You can travel to NYC though.

Quote:

My job also is in STEM (research involving math, programming and statistics) which is great but only first world countries have well paying jobs in that area.

Only first world countries? There are so many of them! Tons of opportunities all over the world. Big cities in the US - tons of opportunities.

Quote:

Now a very important question: how much of the blame should I put on myself and how much of it on my environment.

What do you have in your town? An REI, some nature, local pubs. Probably not the best place to meet women either. Yeah - your environment is a part of the problem. You're not failing the American dream.

[Spidey]

(10-01-2017 08:16 AM)duedue Wrote:  

As a foreigner from a poor background I think I should be glad that I have a job here that pays me almost twice of an average American. But....unfortunately...I'm not. There are several reasons: an office job that doesn't involve much interaction with others, living in a small conservative town in the middle of nowhere, the women and also memories from Europe

It sounds like you've placed too much focus on money. And it sounds like you're realizing that there's more to life than having more toys than your neighbor. This is a good thing. I think you should chase new experiences. You have some great memories of living in Europe? Good! After this period of your life you can cross off living in small town America. Quit the job and try something new. And good luck!

[duedue]

GreenHills, it's interesting you mentioned NYC. I just remembered one of the best reactions I've got from girls here was from a girl visiting from NYC. The reason I said "only first word countries" was that they tend to be feminist.

Spidy, no not really. One thing is that I've always worked in the academia which restricts the options a lot but then switching to corporates is nontrivial. Actually I just realized that getting an H1 visa for industries is much more difficult than the cap-exempt H1 I currently have. Seems the only fast solution is to look for jobs abroad.

[Sonoma]

You make six figures.

You could easily be flying into cities every other weekend for the time of your life

[buja]

(10-01-2017 12:26 PM)GreenHills Wrote:  

Buja, care to elaborate on citizenship? Getting it is the only way to get a green card for your parents. You can also leave the US for an unlimited period of time. And if you decide that you don't want to be an American, you can probably renounce it.

With a green card you can leave for a year only.

Yes, only US citizens can sponsor their parents for a green card/residency.

A US Green Card means you have all the tax and financial reporting obligations of a a US citizen.

It is much easier to ditch the Green Card/Residency than to ditch citizenship.

If you don't want to live in US the rest of your life, then you should never burden yourself with US citizenship.

[Brodiaga]

You don't have to decide right now. Start looking for a job in those locations you mentioned. If you find a great job in a great location, give it a try and move there. If you're still here by the time you are eligible for a green card, consider getting it just in case.

A lot also depends on your current citizenship. It's one thing if you have a European passport for example, then getting a green card and eventually US citizenship will make tax reporting more difficult but won't add too much value to your life unless you are determined to stay in the US. However, if you have a passport from a poor country, that's a different story.