[GreenHills]

I have a friend, classic "really nice guy", who is in a relationship with a "really nice girl".

The problem is that every time I'm around him I have to listen to him going on and on about how his girlfriend is the best. How she's so sexy (she's a nerdy short Asian, not sexy by regular men's standards), how she's so intelligent, how she's so young and he's so lucky to have such a young girl (she's 26), how the sex is out of this world, how her ass is so nice and big (never seen any ass on her, she's super tiny in all dimensions).

I'm talking every single time.

It's really getting on my nerves and I'm starting to question myself - do I envy this guy, is this what's going on? Maybe I do - I don't see my girl as some out of this world goddess and apparently he does. Or is the bragging just getting annoying?

I'm curious if someone has had a friend like this. Most of my other friends don't bother me with epic pedestalizing of their women.

[Leonard D Neubache]

Tell him to put up a picture of her holding a "roast me" sign on the appropriate reddit page.

[John Michael Kane]

I'd just let it drop. He's your friend. If he's happy to have her (and you have no reason to suspect that she is trouble), then be happy for your friend. You could remind him that although you're happy for him, just remember not to put her on a pedestal so that she starts taking him for granted. Now you've done your job as a friend without being bitter.

[Roosh]

Sounds like he has doubts about her and he's trying to convince himself to stay with her. A man who's enjoying his woman doesn't feel the need to make logical arguments of why.

[John Michael Kane]

Some beta guys are just really happy to be in a relationship. He could be rationalizing staying with her like you said, but he could also be happy. OP, does he genuinely appear happy or or do think he's trying convince himself?

[Leonard D Neubache]

Might be time to drop some red-pill truth about women getting cold feet when their man is too enthusiastic.

A guy that acts like this generally tends to treat his girlfriend like she's the Queen of Siam and then ends up utterly gutted when she dumps him for no apparent reason.

You would be wise to bring him back down to earth. Ask him "do you act like this around her?"

If he says yes then explain to him that nothing kills a woman's attraction for a man faster than the understanding that he's in puppy love with her, because it obviously means she's aimed too low and ended up with a guy that's way below her SMV.

Tell him you're happy for him, but if he's serious about keeping this girl on the hook then he needs to tone down this:



And work towards more of this:



If he takes your advice to heart for fear of losing this chick then it should start to be reflected in the way he talks about her, and hopefully in the amount of time he spends yakking about her as well, and you'll be doing each other a favour.

Don't forget to make it abundantly clear that you're happy for him, but he needs to keep his cool and make her work for his affection or she's going to get the impression that she can trade up.

Honestly, especially for younger guys this is one of the hardest truths to accept and even harder to put into practice, but generally you only ever endure one disastrous breakup after being told this, since you generally tend to ignore it and then have it proven to you in the worst possible way.

[not-a-pua]

Do you have pictures of your girls on your phone? Choose the best, the best picture, next time he starts, hold up your cell.

[Simeon_Strangelight]

Sounds to me like he has had very little sexual experience and is fully in the Blue Pill Beta mindset.

Nothing can get him out of there in his current state. Unless the woman is deeply k-selected and highly resistant towards Beta tendencies, then he is in for a world of pain. In some rare cases he can upkeep the illusion. Some rare Gammas even manage to uphold the illusion their own life if they manage to get a high-level Silicon Valley or Wallstreet job - the others are looking towards divorce and dumpster diving.

[crdr]

Personally, I stopped giving a shit what my friends do.

[GreenHills]

I think the guy is genuinely happy, which is great. I don't wish bad relationships upon my friends.

And I think he's way too nice to her, always catering to her, always having that "honey are you ok?" voice. Is it going to lead to troubles? He certainly won't listen to me if I warn him, he think he's at the top of his abilities with women since he's dating such a hot chick. The girl is the quiet Asian nerdy girl type, possibly a virgin (he doesn't share, she asked him not to share anything sexual with friends). It doesn't seem like she's going to riot.

I just don't like that he has to rub it in my face how amazing she is, when she's clearly pretty average. I guess it's because early on I mentioned that she's nothing special and she's too short and he shouldn't have any trouble getting laid with her.

[Cr33pin]

I can't stop bragging about how big my dick is

pm me for details

[h3ltrsk3ltr]

(07-29-2017 02:36 PM)GreenHills Wrote:  

I think the guy is genuinely happy, which is great. I don't wish bad relationships upon my friends.

And I think he's way too nice to her, always catering to her, always having that "honey are you ok?" voice. Is it going to lead to troubles? He certainly won't listen to me if I warn him, he think he's at the top of his abilities with women since he's dating such a hot chick. The girl is the quiet Asian nerdy girl type, possibly a virgin (he doesn't share, she asked him not to share anything sexual with friends). It doesn't seem like she's going to riot.

I just don't like that he has to rub it in my face how amazing she is, when she's clearly pretty average. I guess it's because early on I mentioned that she's nothing special and she's too short and he shouldn't have any trouble getting laid with her.

[Repo]

Your friend sounds annoying but you also sound like a shit friend. Stop caring so much and being so tender.

[RatInTheWoods]

Just take a moment now and again to celebrate your mates happiness and joy.

True friends are happy when their mate is happy. Acknowledge and express your enjoyment of his happiness.

If he goes on too much, just take the piss till he gets the idea, but don't end up sounding like a butt-hurt jealous kill joy.

[MongolianAbroad]

Tell him pics or it didn't happen.

[Khan]

I've met guys like this before. It could be any of the following:

1) He could be madly in love with her, and genuinely happy;
2) He could be unhappy but stuck in this relationship out of desperation, hence the need to convince himself and others he's having it so great;
3) He could be deliberately trying to provoke jealousy in you. Even your friends can behave like dicks sometimes.

But if his bragging really is getting on your nerves, then it might be that you're jealous of your friend. Whatever it is, you shouldn't care too much about others and their lives. Just concentrate on making your life better.

[Sonoma]

Have you ever told him how plain and average his girlfriend looks?

I don't have male friendships that can't withstand me being honest.

[General Stalin]

Sounds like this dude is new to having a woman in his life in such a capacity and is just really happy so it's all he can talk about. Let him be happy and don't get so salty about it. Eventually he will chill out on it and all will be well.

[chitown72]

(07-29-2017 11:55 AM)Zelcorpion Wrote:  

Sounds to me like he has had very little sexual experience and is fully in the Blue Pill Beta mindset.

Nothing can get him out of there in his current state.

x2

OP, Just send him a few links to these kinds of sites. That will get his mind spinning. LOL

[GreenHills]

(07-31-2017 11:52 AM)General Stalin Wrote:  

Sounds like this dude is new to having a woman in his life in such a capacity and is just really happy so it's all he can talk about. Let him be happy and don't get so salty about it. Eventually he will chill out on it and all will be well.

He was in a long LTR before and he's been with that girl for a year already. He had a two year dry spell in between. At first I was like "high five dude, you found a girl" and "nice dude, you like the sex with your new bish". A year later, I'm tired of that and it's eroding my friendship with him.

There's something that's not quite alright about a guy pumping his ego through his friends, but I've known him for a long long time and I don't want to toss male friendships away. I value my friendship with him in other aspects.

I'll just talk with him next time he starts to put the girl on the highest of pedestals.

[crdr]

(07-31-2017 02:02 PM)GreenHills Wrote:  

I'll just talk with him next time he starts to put the girl on the highest of pedestals.

Reasoning with a man in this state is futile. Get on with your life. It's the best thing for you and him.

[General Stalin]

(07-31-2017 02:02 PM)GreenHills Wrote:  

(07-31-2017 11:52 AM)General Stalin Wrote:  

Sounds like this dude is new to having a woman in his life in such a capacity and is just really happy so it's all he can talk about. Let him be happy and don't get so salty about it. Eventually he will chill out on it and all will be well.

He was in a long LTR before and he's been with that girl for a year already. He had a two year dry spell in between. At first I was like "high five dude, you found a girl" and "nice dude, you like the sex with your new bish". A year later, I'm tired of that and it's eroding my friendship with him.

There's something that's not quite alright about a guy pumping his ego through his friends, but I've known him for a long long time and I don't want to toss male friendships away. I value my friendship with him in other aspects.

I'll just talk with him next time he starts to put the girl on the highest of pedestals.

Regardless I'd really recommend against telling him not pedestrianize her.

At best you can just be like "you got anything else to talk about?" - Let him know yammering about his girl 24/7 is annoying and although you're happy for him you'll like to talk about other shit

[Chowder Head]