[ElJefe]

As you get feel more confident as you experience increasing success from game, you'll notice a multiplier effect as girls take more notice of you. Why? Bodylanguage.

But you don't have to FEEL confident to have good body-language. Simply being self-aware will allow you to stand in a way that tells girls you're alpha.

For instance: drinks. Don't hold your drink in front of your chest, your elbow bent. You come across as fearful, nervous and vulnerale. Let your arm drop, and hold your drink below your hip. Your open stance signals you're not worried and you master social venues.

Stance: legs apart at shoulder width. Take up space.

On a date, make sure you take the couch seat. Lean back, rest your calf/ankle on your knee, or just spread your legs while leaning back, putting your arms up on the couch. Slouching isn't necessary, but that's WAY better then leaning in over the table. As you do this, you'll notice she leans into you.

Then there's the infamous not facing girls when talking to them. Talk to them over your shoulder instead.

I know you players out there got other good ideas. What else?

[NoBalls]

(09-01-2011 05:39 AM)ElJefe Wrote:  

As you get feel more confident as you experience increasing success from game, you'll notice a multiplier effect as girls take more notice of you. Why? Bodylanguage.

But you don't have to FEEL confident to have good body-language. Simply being self-aware will allow you to stand in a way that tells girls you're alpha.

For instance: drinks. Don't hold your drink in front of your chest, your elbow bent. You come across as fearful, nervous and vulnerale. Let your arm drop, and hold your drink below your hip. Your open stance signals you're not worried and you master social venues.

Stance: legs apart at shoulder width. Take up space.

On a date, make sure you take the couch seat. Lean back, rest your calf/ankle on your knee, or just spread your legs while leaning back, putting your arms up on the couch. Slouching isn't necessary, but that's WAY better then leaning in over the table. As you do this, you'll notice she leans into you.

Then there's the infamous not facing girls when talking to them. Talk to them over your shoulder instead.

I know you players out there got other good ideas. What else?

Is it these actual body language mistakes that mess up interactions with women or are these body language mistakes just an indication of a deeper lack of confidence?

I think if a super confident guy who was feeling very good about himself and feeling at the top of the world would be able to make these body language mistakes and the girl would still feel attracted to him.

[ElJefe]

(09-01-2011 09:25 AM)NoBalls Wrote:  

Is it these actual body language mistakes that mess up interactions with women or are these body language mistakes just an indication of a deeper lack of confidence?

I think if a super confident guy who was feeling very good about himself and feeling at the top of the world would be able to make these body language mistakes and the girl would still feel attracted to him.

I think most guys aren't aware of proper body-language because they lack role-models to emulate. If your Dad was in the military or an aristocrat, I reckon you'd have a good idea of what good body language is - but for most boys, they don't learn much.

I am trying to picture in my head a guy who is super-confident, yet makes the above body-langauge mistakes - it's not easy, but why make it harder for yourself?

Come on - the rest of you - share some tips.

I've already seen smoking as a recommendation for improving body-language.

[Spike]

All the things you are describing is basic Mystery stuff, i think most posters here already know about it and don't feel the need to post more.
Most important thing in a club is to have a fun, happy and careless vibe. which is hard to fake when you are going out solo.
When i have that vibe, the feeling you're on top of the world, usually things happen for me.

[Basil Ransom]

(09-01-2011 09:25 AM)NoBalls Wrote:  

Is it these actual body language mistakes that mess up interactions with women or are these body language mistakes just an indication of a deeper lack of confidence?

I think if a super confident guy who was feeling very good about himself and feeling at the top of the world would be able to make these body language mistakes and the girl would still feel attracted to him.

It's both: Improving your body language will make you feel more confident AND confident people have better body language. I'm sure I can find studies on this.

(09-03-2011 10:51 AM)ElJefe Wrote:  

I've already seen smoking as a recommendation for improving body-language.

Smoking is excellent. I don't smoke, but when I do smoke cigars, my body language is immeasurably superior. I'm more absorbed in enjoying the cigar, and hardly take notice of her. My rate of speech slows, my eyes narrow, and I say less overall. Even my voice changes. Smoking looks cool, and it says "my #1 priority is enjoying this cigar, not talking to you." You'll be a lot less reactive as well.

But to keep a girl when you are so muted, the outside distractions have to be minimized. Fortunately, most smoking sections are outside and fairly chill.

I feel cooler just because I'm smoking a cigar, and so does everyone else. We've all been primed by movies and such to see guys who smoke as cool. Plus, you'll create intrigue when you've got a cigar and everyone else is on cigarettes. You can get decent cigars online for $2 a piece, vastly cheaper than any drink you'll buy. I haven't cigar gamed in a long time, but I've got a shipment coming in soon, planning to resume.

It all sounds like BS, until you try it. And it may be 'all in your head,' but if you express it wholeheartedly, your body language will convey that, and will attract women.

Another thing: Personally, if it weren't for pussy, I'd probably never go out to bars, as I don't especially enjoy drinking the swill on tap amidst booming music and blacking out. Smoking lets you avoid all that.

[ElJefe]

I understand it's all BASIC - I want to get the conversation started - body-language doesn't get much talk in here, yet as we know - it's vital and yet so rare to see someone with "tight" body-language. Top-level CEOs have it. A man with a shitload of life experience and success has it. I rarely see a player/PUA with good body language. So.. good tips on how to develop that or where to look for inspiration ought to be of use to 90 percent of the guys in this forum.

I enjoy cigars - but who smokes cigars at a bar? Of course, the novelty would get plenty of girls interested at some level, even if her first comment would be something like "ewww". The higher-quality girls would probably be the most interested of all.

However - I once spotted a guy smoking a cigar, and the first thing I thought was "try-hard". But if I HAD to do it, I'm guessing my Padróns and my Central American adventures would make for good game.