[Rawmeo]

I am an expecting father and one of my main life goals is to one day become a great-grandfather. I plan on having 3 kids with my wife, and one question came to my mind: what is life gives me a gay son?

My wife often says, "I don't agree with gay marriage, but if you hate on gays, you'll get a gay child". I honestly don't know how I would react should this happen. I would still love him unconditionally as he remains my son, but I'd obviously be disappointed.

How would RVF react?

[BrewDog]

Asshole.

[Rawmeo]

(03-05-2017 12:21 AM)BrewDog Wrote:  

Asshole.

Care to elaborate?

[BrewDog]

(03-05-2017 12:35 AM)Rawmeo Wrote:  

(03-05-2017 12:21 AM)BrewDog Wrote:  

Asshole.

Care to elaborate?

Thought about it again.

Delete.

[BrewDog]

Yep, delete this one, too.

[Rawmeo]

BrewDog added to ignore list.

The reason why this is in the "deep forum" is to think about hypothetical situations that some people haven't lived, some people have, and to see various opinions on the topic.

[polymath]

I don't know. I try to be open minded but it would be disappointing to me, too, to be honest.

If the child comes out of the closet as an adult, I would hide my disappointment for the entirety of my life.

If the child is dabbling in effeminate things as a youth, I would steer him towards more masculine activities.

I don't buy into the new-age gender theory BS, so I think the general conversational themes in my household wouldn't encourage self-exploration in the realm of gender.

But I have to admit that there are a lot of gay people too, and they need strong and good fathers just as much as straight people do. I mean, your parents have such a formative impact on your life. People with hostile parents sometimes spend their whole lives trying to come to terms with those relationships. So I guess even if you're disappointed, you still have a job to do as a dad.

By "you", I of course mean anyone-- you, me, Bob down the street.

[BrewDog]

(03-05-2017 12:56 AM)Rawmeo Wrote:  

BrewDog added to ignore list.

The reason why this is in the "deep forum" is to think about hypothetical situations that some people haven't lived, some people have, and to see various opinions on the topic.

Perhaps you won't see this, and that's fine. But everyone else will.

You're stewing about a gay son you don't have. And even if you do have a gay son one day, so what? Are you that shallow?

Maybe I'm a bit more forgiving than others, but I wouldn't care. My father doesn't give a single shit about me for much lesser reasons than this. And he's a jerk. He's an asshole.

If you're going to stew over the possibility that one day you may have a homo son and whether or not to despise him, then you need help that this forum can't give you.

[Sidney Crosby]

I'd sign something right saying I will accept a gay son as long as I'm guaranteed not to have "trans" son or daughter.

[Mark Fletcher]

(03-05-2017 01:01 AM)BrewDog Wrote:  

(03-05-2017 12:56 AM)Rawmeo Wrote:  

BrewDog added to ignore list.

The reason why this is in the "deep forum" is to think about hypothetical situations that some people haven't lived, some people have, and to see various opinions on the topic.

Perhaps you won't see this, and that's fine. But everyone else will.

You're stewing about a gay son you don't have. And even if you do have a gay son one day, so what? Are you that shallow?

Maybe I'm a bit more forgiving than others, but I wouldn't care. My father doesn't give a single shit about me for much lesser reasons than this. And he's a jerk. He's an asshole.

If you're going to stew over the possibility that one day you may have a homo son and whether or not to despise him, then you need help that this forum can't give you.

He didn't say anything about "despising" him. He said he wondered if he'd be disappointed. Which is a valid concern. I would love to have a son that would pass on my genes and eventually give me grandchildren, and continue my lineage generations on down. Having a gay son would obviously change all that. It would be natural to be disappointed, the real issue is how you would handle the situation.

It's not like he said he'd toss his gay son down the stairs.

[BrewDog]

There are legitimate reasons to be disappointed in a child, and this isn't one. If you've ever read any of my posts, you'll know that I can be a bit of a hardass. But I have no animosity towards anyone for being gay or black or Jewish or any other shallow reason to decide to dislike a human being.

I should have just stayed the fuck out of this thread.

[Mark Fletcher]

(03-05-2017 01:48 AM)BrewDog Wrote:  

There are legitimate reasons to be disappointed in a child, and this isn't one. If you've ever read any of my posts, you'll know that I can be a bit of a hardass. But I have no animosity towards anyone for being gay or black or Jewish or any other shallow reason to decide to dislike a human being.

I should have just stayed the fuck out of this thread.

If you were expecting a son and got to choose if he would grow up to be gay or straight, I'm willing to bet you'd pick straight. It's only natural to want your son to be like you.

[BrewDog]

Do we get to choose if our kids are hetero? Is there some sort of form we check yes or no? Faggot or straight?

No? Then being the case where I have no control over it, I'd try my fucking best to love my child regardless. We could do this shit all day with "What if?"

"What if your child is retarded or autistic or ugly?"

Love the kid anyhow.

I suppose this is a bit touchy to me because I spent a lifetime wanting my father to be proud of me, and he's not. He was always my hero. I've done lots of manly shit in my life. I'm successful. I have pretty girlfriends. I look just like my father. And he still doesn't love me. He told me so, and that's the last time we ever spoke.

Perhaps my personal experiences with this make me somewhat more openminded and nonjudgemental. And a bit touchy.

[Transsimian]

I'd be disappointed, but only if he uses his homosexuality as an excuse not to give me grandchildren.

Surogates, and in the future, artificial wombs will be a thing.

[infowarrior1]

I don't know. But he would certainly be aware of my stance on the issue related to sodomy. Give him opportunity to repent although steering him towards celibacy. So that he can channel his sexual energy towards more productive endeavors.

If he of course just comes out and acts like a bitch as an adult despite all my efforts. Then I will cut him loose.

He will have opportunity to repent and live Godly life. But he will never sway my stance on this issue.

[polnischspeaker234]

(03-05-2017 01:48 AM)BrewDog Wrote:  

There are legitimate reasons to be disappointed in a child, and this isn't one. If you've ever read any of my posts, you'll know that I can be a bit of a hardass. But I have no animosity towards anyone for being gay or black or Jewish or any other shallow reason to decide to dislike a human being.

I should have just stayed the fuck out of this thread.

[monsquid]

As Epictetus said:

"Duties are universally measured by relations. Is anyone a father? If so, it is implied that the children should take care of him, submit to him in everything, patiently listen to his reproaches, his correction. But he is a bad father. Is you naturally entitled, then, to a good father? No, only to a father. Is a brother unjust? Well, keep your own situation towards him. Consider not what he does, but what you are to do to keep your own faculty of choice in a state conformable to nature. For another will not hurt you unless you please. You will then be hurt when you think you are hurt."

So it is with your son or daughter. Are you entitled to a specific type of child in the image of your ideal? No, only a son or daughter, rest is up to nature, culture, society, and genes.

Children need loving parents who guide them and provide mentorship. They don't need constant judgment telling them right or wrong because the rest of the world will do that to them.

To answer OP's question, Yes I will accept my gay son if I ever had one. I have a few gay friends and they are wonderful people. I don't necessarily agree with a lot of their life choices but that goes for anyone, gay or straight.

[LockeAndLoad]

Yes. He's your son. Seems to me a real man would accept his own son no matter what.

[Pete]

I would accept him. I mean, I'd try to steer him away from that. But I'd still be proud of him.

I know what's it like to have a father that isn't proud of you and/or doesn't even care about you and it still bothers me. I wouldn't wish that to anyone.

[Kid Twist]

The funny thing is that, especially since this is RVF, the progressive agenda has crept in here, and I think it is unbeknownst to most. It is the way language shapes ideas and how when they change language and its underlying presumptions, they have changed the way you think and logic.

One is only "homosexual" insomuch as he has sex with men. There are levels of epigenetics that likely steer attraction and make it somewhat malleable, but by and large attraction is set by the time teenage years roll around.

Who you are attracted to by definition can't be "wrong" it just is. The kind of lifestyle you live is an action/life choice with consequences.

THAT IS WHAT IS IN QUESTION.

Don't be fooled by simple language with lazy presumptions. Generally speaking, they are meant to manipulate the way you think about things, both "secularly" and "religiously."

[Soothesayer]

I would treat him the same as if he came out as a pedo.

No mercy (until he came to his senses). Men are allowed to fuckup on occasion, but the true test of manhood is whether they revel in their evil or come clean and stay clean.

[LINUX]

How do you define "accept"-- to believe or recognize? to regard favorably? to not disown?

Semantics are a bit tricky with this question as different definitions would have different answers.

[YoungAngel1]

I've given this some thought, and I would for sure say, yes.

I'm not nearly as anti-gay as some posters are around here, but I do understand why they are against it. I guess for me, I don't pretend to know all the answers, and our creator is the ultimate judge.

[LionHound]

After pondering for a while I've come to the conclusion that what repulses me most about gay men is the way they(often) conduct themselves. If my gay son conducted himself with dignity and was otherwise an honorable, upstanding citizen, then I don't think there'd be a problem. If he was the in-your-face, super flamboyant type that tried to act as stereotypically gay as possible then I would have issues with that sort of behavior. Just as parents have issues with hetero children that act out and conduct themselves poorly.

[Mirjan]

Sincerely I do not know, I have thought about it though.

Probably I would have disowned him, but still I am not sure. He would be still my blood.

Even injecting testosterone in him, would probably cause death.

However, I don't think I will ever come to this situation.