[Feldeinsamkeit]

I'm on day 9 of a no-fap streak and this morning the eye-fucking I was getting from women on the street in Leipzig was phenomenal. Up until now, women have always looked away - and often quite waspishly at that, screwing up their bitchfaces and flicking their head sharply to the side - whenever I've made direct eye contact with them, with only the occasional exception here and there that was receptive to my visual IOI. But today was like I had become a different person: Not only in terms of the volume of women of all ages giving me sustained eye-contact, but girls blushing, biting their lips the more I looked into their eyes, the playing with their hair, women doing double-takes, the full monty. Not only this, but even when I was looking towards the pavement and would glance up, there would be women trying to glance into my eyes repeatedly. I know what I'm writing here sounds bat shit crazy, because I would hardly have believed it myself, had it not been followed with the following approaches that I made on the back of some of it. As for my age, I'm 42, although I look a few years younger if I'm clean shaven.

Anyway, I'll get straight to those approaches: When I was walking up the main drag into the marketplace of Leipzig, I caught this smokeshow - a genuine 8 by objective standards - coming towards me. I looked at her and noticed how she was looking directly into my eyes and then started to suppress a smile as she did so. Now, this girl reminded me of a pornstar that I've jacked off to many times before - mid-20s, brunette with hair tied up in a bun, ample arse in a tight white jeans and wearing goofy wide-rimmed ironic glasses - right up my street, looks-wise. I hesitate for a second before turning around and following her into the drugstore which I've just passed and she's already gone into. I head straight up to her midway in the store and she is stationary perusing the lipsticks in the cosmetics section. I go right up beside her and say the first thing which comes into my head, "You don't need any of that gear, you're hot enough as you are", to which she immediately turns around and starts bantering with me with a smile on her face. It's clear that she's happy I've approached and that she knows what the deal is, given the eye contact that we've both exchanged about 2 minutes previously on the street. Although my game wasn't terrible, it wasn't particularly tight, either and I ended up losing frame and stumbling over one or two sentences, which I think caused this broad to lose some respect for me. But it was clear that she wanted to be approached by me, even if I didn't handle the follow-through part of the interaction well enough by holding a sufficiently firm frame. After three minutes or so of bantering and finding out what she does in the city, she picks the lippy she wants and goes on her way.

The next interaction came much later on in the day. I spotted a cute blonde, a nerdy-looking 7 in a second hand store and headed straight in. When I walked past her, she cast me a glance which was encouraging. I meandered a little at the book section just behind her and I noticed that she cast another couple of glances as I did so, so I thought to myself, this looks like it might be game on again. Anyway, she comes up next to me as I'm looking at some glass trinkets and I turn around to look at her. She flashes me a very cautious smile and I then open her by making a comment on the trinkets. We quickly get into conversation and start finding out about what we're both doing here in Leipzig. All the while, she's moved closer to me, is beginning to blush when the more I ask about her and is clearly relishing the encounter. She eventually motions to move away, so I don't waste any more time and ask her out for a coffee. This is where it gets interesting: She hesitates before saying yes, then after a few seconds mentions that she's got a boyfriend. But it was clear that - at the very least - she was seriously tempted to. Being an idiot, I didn't press for the date, but simply joked that I wouldn't tell her boyfriend about us meeting up. But the insane thing about the encounter was how up for it she looked - her eyes were sparkling, she was blushing, playing with her hair during the interaction and you could cut the sexual tension with a knife between us.

Up to now, I've been running purely indirect game by making random situational comments to various girls in bookstores, drugstores, et.c. but haven't really been generating anywhere near as much attraction as occurred today with the two broads I've described above, an effect which probably is the result of the no-fap streak now kicking in. I've also been on a long - i.e. 3 year - dry spell, which is the reason why I've taken up daygame again but am seriously considering going much more direct in my interactions with student-age girls, starting tomorrow, since my failure up to now is that I've approached a very limited number of women, mostly via social circle game.

So my question is this: Given what happened with the first hot girl, i.e. clear IOI on the street followed by very receptive response when I confronted her in the drugstore with a direct opener which made my intentions clear from the start, should I also attempt this again with other girls of her age that give me a similar on-the-street IOI? I ask because nearly every pick-up guru advises against direct game, especially for beginners. My feeling, however, is that the more direct you are with German women - especially the younger ones - the more receptive they are, since German men seem terrified to even make eye-contact with them on the street, let alone approach them and it seems that this leaves them quite receptive to a ballsy guy who's prepared to put his money where his mouth is.

[Travesty]

Playful indirect observation about her that invites flirty banter.

[crudeloyalist]

Firstly, well done for taking action and leaving the UK. I applaud you.

Direct or indirect is too narrow a question. That's like asking a boxer to choose between a jab or a hook. The answer is, it depends on the situation. A player has many tools in his arsenal. The trick is to know when to use the right tool. So it depends on the situation, your personality, your intentions.

Cater your game to your personality and your environment. So you're an early 40s English guy in Germany. Use it to your advantage.

Are you looking for quick bangs, a girlfriend, a wife? You should prioritise getting a few fast bangs to get rid of that 3 year dry period. That's not doing you any favours. Bang a fatty if you have to but just get it out of the way.

[RatInTheWoods]

Invitations for you to risk your pride, pour our energy, compliment them and entertain and validate them.

But ultimately they not interested.

Hazards of day game.

Imagine dozens of hot women doing that for you each day by just throwing them a glance. Its their sport.

[Feldeinsamkeit]

(02-15-2017 05:35 PM)crudeloyalist Wrote:  

Firstly, well done for taking action and leaving the UK. I applaud you.

Direct or indirect is too narrow a question. That's like asking a boxer to choose between a jab or a hook. The answer is, it depends on the situation. A player has many tools in his arsenal. The trick is to know when to use the right tool. So it depends on the situation, your personality, your intentions.

OK, here's the deal. My modus operandi up to now has been to lurk in the bookstores and approach the odd girl here or there that caught my attention, using a situational opener on the book she was reading. But then when I noticed the eye-contact I was getting on the street today, I took the leap to open girls more or less directly off the street, at least in the case of the first I opened today.

So, to try to answer your question more specifically, my situation will probably look like this: I'll get a bit of flirty eye contact going with a young woman sat opposite me on the tram, then as I'm getting off I'll want to open her with a comment. Now my dilemma is what I should open her with, whether I should try to craft a situational observation out of her dress style (which is often very difficult given how boringly most German women dress) and which, in any case, is probably going to come off as too needy, since she already knows that I want to fuck her, or whether I should just say some variation of, "Excuse me, I wanted to let you know that I think you're really cute. Are you a student here?", in which case I'm laying my cards clearly on the table from the get-go. The other main variation of this is going to be what I did this morning, where I pass a girl on the street after exchanging flirty glances with her, then follow her into a shop and open without delay.

[crudeloyalist]

All girls know men want to bang. Why waste her and your time by disguising your intentions?

Your 'Excuse me, I wanted to let you know that I think you're really cute. Are you a student here?' line is fine, if it works for you. It seems you're getting too hung up on what to say. It doesn't really matter. The key thing is to make her feel something. Curiosity, flattery, make her laugh, surprise her, whatever. Just make her feel something, then go from there. You want to generate some sexual tension.

What are your logistics like? Are you in a position to instadate and then take them back to yours?

[Hypno]

if you limit your openers to those who give you IOS, then you go indirect to some level to give plausible deniability but everything else - your smile, your posture, etc. should be as direct as possible. establish kino early. throw in sexual innuendo. plausible deniability is necessary on some level for her benefit due to the age differences. she also needs to know you'll be discreet. she doesn't want you because you can take her to dinner or a movie. she wants you because you can take her in a way she hasnt been taken before

[Mufasa]

lol this thread title....

[gmoneysauce]

(02-15-2017 05:35 PM)crudeloyalist Wrote:  

Cater your game to your personality and your environment. So you're an early 40s English guy in Germany. Use it to your advantage.

Are you looking for quick bangs, a girlfriend, a wife? You should prioritise getting a few fast bangs to get rid of that 3 year dry period. That's not doing you any favours. Bang a fatty if you have to but just get it out of the way.

I think this is the best advice (bolded above). I am 48, look 40, but I'm just a little ahead of you in your game journey. I've read through tons of Giovonny's approaches and I have sometimes been doing direct day game when the situation affords it and I feel in the zone. At this point I'm just developing the best version of myself.

Overall, I think that at our stage of life, focusing on your inner game, being the master of your destiny, and doing what you like to do, being where you like to be, traveling where you want to travel, will give you the vibe you seek and have seem to hit. Don't try to be someone else, be the best version of yourself. You are an experienced man and an adventurous seeker of the best that life has to offer. You have proven that by the action you are taking in your life. A young girl would be lucky to have your company for a day or a night or a weekend.

I also have been on a no-porn (for a while) and finally a no-fap streak (for about two months) after some disappointing bedroom results in December.

I guess I have been back at it for about five years but really have only worked on my game over the past 18-24 months. Getting out of a dry spell will do wonders for you and it is the first step. It worked for me.

Sounds like you made an awesome move getting out of the U.K. For me it is going to latin america from the US. I am going two to three times a year now and have one long term plate in Mexico City.

For me, I have worked my way down to the 18-23 range over time. I naively thought it would be better to hit up 40 somethings, my age, but to corroborate much of the material in the forum. It is too much bullshit for too little benefit.

Sometimes I can invite a 18 year old over to my place and get her watching a movie on my bed and be banging in a couple of hours (this is still very rare but it has happened) but a 40 year old will want dinner date after dinner date.....enough about that.

I don't think you can really do wrong in your approaches. One thing that will happen is that you will start to build a solid frame which is the basis of older guy game. Get confident in every area in your life and it will show. Talk to every 18-24 year old girl you bump into and you will start to get a natural feel for it without being too self-concious. I'm not quite there myself but now know that I have to do certain things to stay in my zone, workout, sleep well, wear a suit that makes me feel good, talk to lots of people (don't spend hours a day isolated on the computer).

I will love to hear more about your journey.
G

[rudebwoy]

(02-15-2017 05:35 PM)crudeloyalist Wrote:  

Firstly, well done for taking action and leaving the UK. I applaud you.

Cater your game to your personality and your environment. So you're an early 40s English guy in Germany. Use it to your advantage.

Are you looking for quick bangs, a girlfriend, a wife? You should prioritise getting a few fast bangs to get rid of that 3 year dry period. That's not doing you any favours. Bang a fatty if you have to but just get it out of the way.

This is a great reply.

You are not on home turf, so you can be a bit riskier. I don't recommend direct approach, as that could come across wrong.

I do recommend insta-dates as much as possible.

You are the new guy in town and are looking to make "friends" to hang out with.

I have a buddy who has lived in my city for 17 years, he still plays the new guy in town role. He has an accent and girls open him all the time because of it.

[Skank_Hunt]

The direct-indirect debate still goes on... I prefer indirect to avoid the instant pedestal but at the same time it takes more energy to think of reasons why you walked up to her, alone, in the middle of the day. Worse still when she passes you on the street and you have no option but to go after her. Indirect then can come off retarded. I've had weird reactions with indirect because the girl knows why I'm talking to her and she knows I just made some bullshit up. I know we're supposed to ramble about random shit for a while but I'm a shit actor and all I am interested in is banging I don't want to talk about the RAM on her cell phone or where to buy organic broccoli.

I know on one level every girl knows what's up but not absolutely 100%, and I just don't like to spam compliments to girls which will just make attitude worse in the future for me and everyone else. (One reason - among quite a few - why I really wish those RSD guys would give it a rest.)

On another direct/indirect thread someone recommended strongly against the whole "new guy in town" angle. However I can safely say that this is among the best. You have to live in a big enough city to do this for a long time though. I try my best to do the "cool but clueless new guy in town looking for people to show him around". I try to project innocent ignorance but also someone who can get into his fair share of mischief. My favorite part about this is that approaches can be indirect, shit, and really lazy. It helps if I genuinely don't know what I'm looking for. Or if I do, I just pretend to be so retarded that I forgot again.

Moving targets gone past you are the hardest. I find I can only plausibly go indirect like that if they don't really notice me walk past first, then I go after them but go way to the side so I come from sort of 10 o'clock.

RB Leipzig are having a fantastic year in the Bundesliga. Say you just arrived and want to know where their stadium is and how you come from UK and have been a fan of RB Leipzig since you were 7 years old and how awesome they are doing this year. Heck maybe even make some RB Leipzig guy friends, go out with them, hit on chicks. Pretending to be a fan of the local city team is great for building a group of loyal guys, if you get close a bit of a brotherhood. The shirts aren't that expensive. Going to matches, learning the chants and screaming your lungs out is pretty cool as well.

[ksbms]

How are you getting on, Feld, with your DG progress in Leipzig?

[Feldeinsamkeit]

(02-21-2017 04:28 PM)ksbms Wrote:  

How are you getting on, Feld, with your DG progress in Leipzig?

Well, I won't bullshit you guys, I haven't done another approach since I last commented on here. It's partly because of being too busy at work, but also because I've been psyching myself up to go more direct and not quite managing to summon up enough courage to repeat what I did on Wednesday and Thursday. Since then, I've been tormenting myself over which opener I should use when going direct and this is also acting as a barrier to me just getting on with the task of hitting up the next target. But I'm going to be free tomorrow morning and will be looking for targets in the centre of town then as soon I get in. As for the eye-contact I've been getting on no-fap, it's still there and even getting more noticable, but - as I said - I just need to find a way to convert these random IOIs into a bang. I know the primary thing holding me back is the failure to carry out the approach and it really fucks me up whenever I reflect on this fact.

I also went out with a Hungarian girl I met on a language exchange website this evening. Despite their being a good vibe between us and bouncing her around a couple of Irish pubs, at the end of the evening I go for the kiss but she literally turns the other cheek and am wondering whether I was too forward in going for the kiss on the first date. But if a girl doesn't kiss you on the first date, why would she do so on another date? I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on how you would have played this, guys.

Over and out.

[ksbms]

(02-21-2017 05:44 PM)Feldeinsamkeit Wrote:  

(02-21-2017 04:28 PM)ksbms Wrote:  

How are you getting on, Feld, with your DG progress in Leipzig?

Well, I won't bullshit you guys, I haven't done another approach since I last commented on here. It's partly because of being too busy at work, but also because I've been psyching myself up to go more direct


If you feel flat, do a flat, generic, indirect approach, e.g., 'You look like girl from Berlin. It is because XYZ. The XYZ can be just a simple cold reading. Then close your mouth, look in her eyes and wait for her to respond. If you feel up there, with momentum, state, and flow, improvise according to situation, girl, and what you feel would be best - indirect, covert direct, direct.


and not quite managing to summon up enough courage to repeat what I did on Wednesday and Thursday. Since then, I've been tormenting myself over which opener I should use

The semantic content is not that important as long as it isn't strange. If a girl likes you, she'll make it work for both of you. Most of the information about your 'fuckability' she'll gather (semi-consciously) from how confidently you present yourself, body language, voice speed and tone, eye-contact, clothes, physique, etc. In a way, words play a second fiddle.


when going direct and this is also acting as a barrier to me just getting on with the task of hitting up the next target. But I'm going to be free tomorrow morning and will be looking for targets in the centre of town then as soon I get in.

Perhaps take 5 minutes. Focus on your breath, slow down your breath, slow down your pace, make it a stroll - imagine you are a satiated lion lazily looking for the right pray. And the most important - forget the past, don't think about the future. only present moment matters, no result, just the interaction itself with a girl.


As for the eye-contact I've been getting on no-fap, it's still there and even getting more noticeable, but - as I said - I just need to find a way to convert these random IOIs into a bang.

Don't look for IOIs - if they are, all the better, but the lion chooses his pray as he sees fit. You like the girl, you approach the girl.

I know the primary thing holding me back is the failure to carry out the approach and it really fucks me up whenever I reflect on this fact.

I also went out with a Hungarian girl I met on a language exchange website this evening. Despite their being a good vibe between us and bouncing her around a couple of Irish pubs, at the end of the evening I go for the kiss but she literally turns the other cheek and am wondering whether I was too forward in going for the kiss on the first date.

You don't go at the end for the kiss. You go for a kiss mid-date so further escalation, i.e., bang is on the table.

Answer is simple and it is a key principle that will quite probably make it or break it - gradual escalation. If you're seated, touch her knee, thigh, touch her arm, touch her hands, touch her hair. If she doesn't recoil, flinch, she's ready.

To quote from Heartiste's:

Kissing is an emergent property of successfully executed game; it is not a standalone game maneuver that you can run in any context. If you haven’t escalated physical touching with a girl during a date, don’t think that a kiss after three hours of arms-crossed shop talk will advance the seduction.

And if a girl she doesn't take kiss well after physical escalation, you need to recover, slow down, build more intimacy, comfort and rapport, re-do the same step, then escalate up to a kiss. It'll be in her eyes. If still denied, be unmoved like a rock, just go for it 5 minutes later. If after a few attempts no luck, try Krauser's routine, otherwise decide either to end the date or just ask her flat out what's the problem - you're a man, she's a woman, what did she expected from it (the date)? She may provide a valuable insight so you can improve with another girl next time. Information is power.

But if a girl doesn't kiss you on the first date, why would she do so on another date?

It's possible there was not enough comfort, she's shy, or she just got surprised but your move - perhaps if you've redone 5 minutes later, it would've worked. Just hail mary her to come over and cook for you or whatever - 1 minute of your time.

I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on how you would have played this, guys.

Over and out.

[Giovonny]

I'm 41 years old.

I approach girls aged 18-22.

Here is my advice:

(02-15-2017 05:01 PM)Feldeinsamkeit Wrote:  

a direct opener which made my intentions clear from the start, should I also attempt this again with other girls of her age that give me a similar on-the-street IOI?

Yes.

If a much younger girl gives you an "ioi", talk to her!

Don't bullshit her and play games!

GO AFTER WHAT YOU WANT!

You can open her indirectly or directly, but, get to the point!

When she is available to have a glass of wine with you!?!

(02-15-2017 05:01 PM)Feldeinsamkeit Wrote:  

I ask because nearly every pick-up guru advises against direct game

Fuck what the "gurus" say!

I am more experienced than most of them!

Do it because you want to, do it because it feels good to you, do it because it feels natural to you, you are a man and she is a woman, just do it!

(02-15-2017 05:01 PM)Feldeinsamkeit Wrote:  

My feeling, however, is that the more direct you are with German women - especially the younger ones - the more receptive they are

Trust YOUR feeling.

German women are very sexual.

They secretly love a ballsy, direct approach!

--

You are over-thinking this!

Just go by your instincts!

When you see a girl you want to fuck, GO TALK TO HER, DON'T BE EMBARRASSED TO BE DIRECT WITH HER!

IT'S TOTALLY NATURAL AND NORMAL FOR A MAN TO GO AFTER WHAT HE WANTS!!!

***

(02-15-2017 05:05 PM)Travesty Wrote:  

Playful indirect observation about her that invites flirty banter.

Yes, and/or...

Playful DIRECT observation about her that invites flirty banter!

"I like your outfit, you have great legs"

"hey pretty lady"

"you like nice"

Be careful to say it with an AIR OF SUPERIORITY, don't speak from a place of inferiority!

***

Quote:

The direct-indirect debate goes on

There is no "debate".

Experienced gamers know that there is a time a place for everything.

I use both depending on the situation and environment.

***

(02-21-2017 05:44 PM)Feldeinsamkeit Wrote:  

Well, I won't bullshit you guys, I haven't done another approach since I last commented on here.

Over-analysis leads to paralysis!

Less thinking, more talking!

[Feldeinsamkeit]

(02-23-2017 03:44 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

I'm 41 years old.

I approach girls aged 18-22.

Here is my advice:

(02-15-2017 05:01 PM)Feldeinsamkeit Wrote:  

a direct opener which made my intentions clear from the start, should I also attempt this again with other girls of her age that give me a similar on-the-street IOI?

Yes.

If a much younger girl gives you an "ioi", talk to her!

Don't bullshit her and play games!

GO AFTER WHAT YOU WANT!

You can open her indirectly or directly, but, get to the point!

When she is available to have a glass of wine with you!?!

(02-15-2017 05:01 PM)Feldeinsamkeit Wrote:  

I ask because nearly every pick-up guru advises against direct game

Fuck what the "gurus" say!

I am more experienced than most of them!

Do it because you want to, do it because it feels good to you, do it because it feels natural to you, you are a man and she is a woman, just do it!

(02-15-2017 05:01 PM)Feldeinsamkeit Wrote:  

My feeling, however, is that the more direct you are with German women - especially the younger ones - the more receptive they are

Trust YOUR feeling.

German women are very sexual.

They secretly love a ballsy, direct approach!

--

You are over-thinking this!

Just go by your instincts!

When you see a girl you want to fuck, GO TALK TO HER, DON'T BE EMBARRASSED TO BE DIRECT WITH HER!

IT'S TOTALLY NATURAL AND NORMAL FOR A MAN TO GO AFTER WHAT HE WANTS!!!

***

(02-15-2017 05:05 PM)Travesty Wrote:  

Playful indirect observation about her that invites flirty banter.

Yes, and/or...

Playful DIRECT observation about her that invites flirty banter!

"I like your outfit, you have great legs"

"hey pretty lady"

"you like nice"

Be careful to say it with an AIR OF SUPERIORITY, don't speak from a place of inferiority!

***

Quote:

The direct-indirect debate goes on

There is no "debate".

Experienced gamers know that there is a time a place for everything.

I use both depending on the situation and environment.

***

(02-21-2017 05:44 PM)Feldeinsamkeit Wrote:  

Well, I won't bullshit you guys, I haven't done another approach since I last commented on here.

Over-analysis leads to paralysis!

Less thinking, more talking!

Thanks very much for your input, Giovonny. Well, I've been up and down like a rollercoaster, emotionally-speaking, since getting back into daygame at the beginning of last month. But the eye-contact I've been getting from German girls on the street since going back on the no-fap programme has encouraged me to be more ballsy in at least some of my approaches. A case in point: I opened an 8 today, early to mid-20s, blonde, leggy, privately educated in the UK and currently a medical student, after spotting her going into a general purpose store. At first she brushed me off saying that she's not into being picked up, then she ended up chatting to me for over 5 minutes, getting very girly, qualifying herself, blushing and even stumbling over her words at times - a total role reversal of how I used to be when approaching during daygame. Unfortunately, I let myself be put off by the, "I have a boyfriend line", even though her body language was signalling a very different message.

The interesting thing about this encounter was that, just as you suggest, the direct/indirect approach debate is illusory, at least in the case of German girls, since they are 100% aware from the get-go that you're hitting on them - that's one thing that I've come to realize in the past month - so if I see a girl that I like I'll just approach and think about what to say to her once I'm right beside her. As you rightly observed, analysis only leads to paralysis, so it's best not to even think about how you're going to open a girl in any case. One thing that I've noticed, though, is that one of Newton's fundamental laws of physics applies to game, too: A daygamer set in motion will continue in motion, unless an external body acts to bring him to rest.

[ksbms]

(02-15-2017 05:01 PM)Feldeinsamkeit Wrote:  

I head straight up to her midway in the store and she is stationary perusing the lipsticks in the cosmetics section. I go right up beside her and say the first thing which comes into my head, "You don't need any of that gear, you're hot enough as you are" [...]

Ballsy, immediate signal you were going "r-selection" route and covertly communicating that only sex was on the table. Fantastic! If delivered the right way, pure gold.

[..] starts bantering with me with a smile on her face. It's clear that she's happy I've approached and that she knows what the deal is, given the eye contact that we've both exchanged about 2 minutes previously on the street. Although my game wasn't terrible, it wasn't particularly tight, either and I ended up losing frame and stumbling over one or two sentences [...]

Game isn't really, I think, played in verbal mode. I have an impression you're too much focused on what you say. Yes, having rich lexicon, and being linguistically witty does provide information to a girl but I think it's overstated in most cases because the girl being the recipient, in majority of cases will not be herself a linguist or literary type. Try physical escalation from the get-go. If you try, you'll get a lot of feedback. Also, could've probed her logistics - either she was free at that time or re-arrange a meet up the same night. Crash the car. Don't be afraid to lose the set. Having a chat or getting a number makes one feel good but, ultimately, better to try to go for broke in a situation like that, then play it safe.

Still, very good job, next time will be better.

[Half Century]

(02-23-2017 03:44 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

I'm 41 years old.

I approach girls aged 18-22.

Here is my advice:



Yes.

If a much younger girl gives you an "ioi", talk to her!

Don't bullshit her and play games!

GO AFTER WHAT YOU WANT!

You can open her indirectly or directly, but, get to the point!

When she is available to have a glass of wine with you!?!

I am 52 and take this advice to heart.

[Giovonny]

(03-31-2017 08:31 PM)Half Century Wrote:  

(02-23-2017 03:44 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

I'm 41 years old.

I approach girls aged 18-22.

Here is my advice:



Yes.

If a much younger girl gives you an "ioi", talk to her!

Don't bullshit her and play games!

GO AFTER WHAT YOU WANT!

You can open her indirectly or directly, but, get to the point!

When she is available to have a glass of wine with you!?!

I am 52 and take this advice to heart.

Killer Instinct.

As older men, we should be better at recognizing and strategically acting on opportunities.

When a younger girl shows interest in you, you better try to connect with her! Life is too short!

[Ironbutt62]

Hear hear! Yes, I agree. Always go for the approach, you've nothing at all to lose this way, especially with strangers in the market, on the train, etc.
It sounds like you are aware of your surroundings and know when you are getting good IOIs. You are just over-thinking your script. You did great starting out with the lipstick girl, great comment... I'm going to use that one...
In my experience, the girls in the age range you are interested in are going to be flattered by an older, professorial-looking man showing attention and interest. Start with that. Go into your approaches assuming you'll leave with the girl on your arm.

[Feldeinsamkeit]

Some of you guys asked a while back about how I've been getting on recently, so I'll say a few words here about that: Since the beginning of April I've completely switched to running direct daygame, which in my case means approaching girls pretty much anywhere in public places during daylight hours, be it in shops, on the street, whilst I am getting off the tram, et.c.; in short wherever an opportunity presents itself in public. Prior to this switch I'd run around 100 indirect approaches - the vast majority of which I admit were half-arsed - and was rewarded with not even a single telephone number as a result, let alone a date. On reflection, I struggled far too much with transitioning from the innocuous situational opener to asking about the girl specifically and the resulting inauthenticity of what I was trying to pull off was probably as noticeable as shit on a shoe to the girl being opened.

Anyway, the first 100 direct approaches were not exactly copied from the PUA textbook in that after I'd delivered the opener, I'd be waiting to gauge the girl's reaction and would be far too slow off the mark in terms of progressing with the interaction, e.g. by failing to stack appropriately. The result would be the girl would take the compliment and then just move on with her daily business. In the first couple of weeks, however, I did get a couple of foreign girls numbers but both of them flaked.

Fast forward until today and things have been picking up speed over the last two weeks. After doing over 150 direct approaches, I have started to become very comfortable approaching good-looking girls and have noticed how my frame has got stronger after every interaction with a set, even the ones that don't give me the result that I'm looking for, such as when a women flirts with me then tells me she's married. The most interesting discovery I've made during my journey over the last month is how women seem to respond extremely positively to a very direct, even overtly sexual approach. For example, once I became more comfortable going "off script" and simply absorbing myself in the moment during the interaction, I found myself making various comments not just about the girl's clothing, but also about how I happened to think she had really shapely legs and how I liked "fit" girls. Rather than get creeped out, I've noticed that this has actually often made the girl go really flushed and just served to increase the temperature of the interaction. Also, as my confidence has increased, I've started to use pauses whilst looking her up and down and then make some comment to the effect of, "Mmmm, yes, I think that XYZ outfit really does look nice on you" and I can see how many girls really love this from the reaction on their faces. Unfortunately, I haven't gotten laid yet from this approach, although I've obtained one instadate and pulled a hot, mid-20s leggy Italian student out on a date after I number-closed her in town. I've also got around 8 other numbers, although they've all flaked. Unfortunately for me, the Italian also flaked after the first date, but at least I'm starting to get numbers with some regularity now from women that pass the boner test with ease.

I do, however, have the feeling that I'm letting far too many women get away who might otherwise be open for some action. Despite getting more confident in expressing my intentions through my words and through my body language, I still have the feeling that I'm not being masculine enough in going after what I want and in communicating this to the girl. In particular, I have often caught myself falling into overly comfort-building chat after I have opened a girl with a direct opener, a fact which I feel is probably leading to me cockblocking myself unwittingly during the interaction.

As a result, I have been wondering today whether it might be a good idea to amp the volume up somewhat by adopting a much more sexual tone from the start of the interaction, by not just saying that I found the girl, "really, really nice" and then commenting on her dress, but by making references to her figure, too, with the accompanying strong frame, including flirty eye-contact, as I deliver this. All of my intuitions, informed as they are by the societal taboos about men not being allowed to approach women on the street in Germany - let alone flirt with them - have turned out to be false thus far, in the sense that the reactions I've received have been much more positive than these taboos would lead one to expect, the many blowouts notwithstanding.

From this it's clear to me many more women than I'd previously imagined do appreciate a ballsy, direct approach from a guy in which he puts his cards on the table from the get-go. In fact, one German woman I instadated after opening her on the street a couple of weeks ago told me that both she and some of her friends hated the fact that men didn't have the balls to directly approach a woman and that she found it so refreshing that I had used this approach on her. That being said, I still feel that I'm not keeping the momentum strong enough after deploying my direct opener and really need to find a way of overwhelming the girl with the vibe of the interaction to the point where I can move to a single day lay.

So my question to you guys is as follows: Do you think that a more overtly sexual opener might be worth a try? Have any of you guys found this to be effective, especially for those who get better results from going direct when opening a set?

[The Breeze]

Look at the progress you have already made!!! Good on you.

Two words - KEEP GOING.

You will always learn, always mature, always gain confidence. Keep going.

[Feldeinsamkeit]

(05-01-2017 02:31 PM)The Breeze Wrote:  

Look at the progress you have already made!!! Good on you.

Two words - KEEP GOING.

You will always learn, always mature, always gain confidence. Keep going.

Thanks for the words of encouragement, Breeze, but I've been on a real downer over the last 24 hours as I've taken stock of all of the flakes that I've had since I started a month ago, which amounts to a rate of around 90%, which is even worse considering that I've only managed to get around 10 numbers in total. And I keep on encountering the same phenomenon that I encountered when I was running daygame in the UK in Middlesbrough: Married women and also those who are in LTRs, will respond warmly when I open them, come in very close physically, play manically with their hair as I'm looking into their eyes, et.c., but then just before I go for the number close, mention their "husband" or "boyfriend", as if in passing.

I had this happen to me again only yesterday with a woman that I thought I'd really cracked it with from the way we were vibeing, but I ended up getting the married card played on me just before the end of the interaction. Now, I've wondered why it's the taken women who behave like this and the following logic suggests itself very strongly to me: The women who are married are attracted to me, but more for the reason that I represent the unattainable, in that because they are now off the market they are not able to act on my offer. However, women that are genuinely single - or who are not dating seriously - don't fall victim to this logic and, having an abundance of options in terms of men to choose from at any time - simply don't find my offer compelling enough to feel any sense of attraction.

For me, Game is a hustle born of necessity that should give me an advantage over the casino. And yet I feel that I am consistently the one being played here, in that women who demonstrate attraction towards me are just milking the interaction for all of the validation they can get, before cashing out by laying down their "taken" card. The very timing of when they play the card, i.e. a good 5+ minutes into the interaction, lends further support to this conclusion. I've become so cynical about this outcome if an interaction is going well that I want to use it as a contrarian indicator that I won't win the set. I'm also tempted to ask as my first question whether the woman is actually single after I've opened her directly with a situational compliment, just to weed out these fucking attention whores.

Sorry for the rant guys, but this shit has really been fucking with my head recently and I can't help but feel that any genuinely available woman is simply not fucking interested whenever I approach her, leaving just the attention whores to game me in the process.

As to how I proceed from here, I'm really at a loss. Is my game not tight enough here for single women, but yet tight enough for attached women, since all they're interested in is getting their egos massaged? Is this a problem that's unique to me here in Germany, or are any of you guys also encountering this problem?

[ksbms]

(05-01-2017 03:52 PM)Feldeinsamkeit Wrote:  

(05-01-2017 02:31 PM)The Breeze Wrote:  

Look at the progress you have already made!!! Good on you.

Two words - KEEP GOING.

You will always learn, always mature, always gain confidence. Keep going.

Thanks for the words of encouragement, Breeze, but I've been on a real downer over the last 24 hours as I've taken stock of all of the flakes that I've had since I started a month ago, which amounts to a rate of around 90%, which is even worse considering that I've only managed to get around 10 numbers in total. And I keep on encountering the same phenomenon that I encountered when I was running daygame in the UK in Middlesbrough: Married women and also those who are in LTRs, will respond warmly when I open them, come in very close physically, play manically with their hair as I'm looking into their eyes, et.c., but then just before I go for the number close, mention their "husband" or "boyfriend", as if in passing.

I had this happen to me again only yesterday with a woman that I thought I'd really cracked it with from the way we were vibeing, but I ended up getting the married card played on me just before the end of the interaction. Now, I've wondered why it's the taken women who behave like this and the following logic suggests itself very strongly to me: The women who are married are attracted to me, but more for the reason that I represent the unattainable, in that because they are now off the market they are not able to act on my offer. However, women that are genuinely single - or who are not dating seriously - don't fall victim to this logic and, having an abundance of options in terms of men to choose from at any time - simply don't find my offer compelling enough to feel any sense of attraction.

For me, Game is a hustle born of necessity that should give me an advantage over the casino. And yet I feel that I am consistently the one being played here, in that women who demonstrate attraction towards me are just milking the interaction for all of the validation they can get, before cashing out by laying down their "taken" card. The very timing of when they play the card, i.e. a good 5+ minutes into the interaction, lends further support to this conclusion. I've become so cynical about this outcome if an interaction is going well that I want to use it as a contrarian indicator that I won't win the set. I'm also tempted to ask as my first question whether the woman is actually single after I've opened her directly with a situational compliment, just to weed out these fucking attention whores.

Sorry for the rant guys, but this shit has really been fucking with my head recently and I can't help but feel that any genuinely available woman is simply not fucking interested whenever I approach her, leaving just the attention whores to game me in the process.

As to how I proceed from here, I'm really at a loss. Is my game not tight enough here for single women, but yet tight enough for attached women, since all they're interested in is getting their egos massaged? Is this a problem that's unique to me here in Germany, or are any of you guys also encountering this problem?

It is difficult without recorded audio/video to make proper assessment and give suggestions. But remember, it's not the verbal stuff that matters most - nonverbals are the key. For example, I can have the same opener but if I approach weakly (say, I had other stuff to deal on my mind and it's just my first set), the girls don't hook. I feel good, got a number of two, I get cocky, strong physical presence, speak low & slow, good eye-contact, front approach, the difference is stark. I may not get a number but then they always hook and conversation ensues. Overconfidence is king. Act as if you've just had a threesome with two Pirelli calendar models.

[Feldeinsamkeit]

OK, here's an update on my daygame escapades in Leipzig since I last chimed in: I managed yesterday to arrange a date for today with legit HB8, a blonde, tight-bodied, mid-20s teaching assistant with a bratty attitude and with baby rabies. Curiously, she didn't flake on me and, although I just couldn't vibe with her because of her vapid and conceited attitude, it represents the best result in terms of hotness of girl that I've pulled thus far, using any form of game. I did make a move on her after I took her to the park and initiated kino by running my hands through her hair, which she was happy with but then I immediately went for a kiss, which she wasn't having any of. As I'd already gotten pissed off with her low-grade cunty attitude, I took her straight back to where she'd left her bike and then went back onto my usual Saturday gaming circuit.

The above result notwithstanding, I'm still having a really hard time getting a decent return on investment, considering the effort that I'm putting into my daygame activities. After crunching the numbers, I've worked out that I have had to approach 65 girl to get each date, which strikes me as a pretty dismal result on reflection. Having said that, I only started going direct in earnest about 5 weeks ago, so there might be room for some improvement here (or at least I hope so). I don't really have a problem vibeing with the majority of the women I open and the majority seem genuinely happy that I've opened them (some of them even say so) - the problem is the same one that I've complained about in previous posts: that around 90% of the women I open say they have partners. Furthermore, I don't think this is an excuse with most of the girls who say this, since they often show me their engagement ring or tell me stuff about their BF when I ask them, which seems legit and not just concocted on the spot as a way of letting me down gently.

Another really big problem is that the vast majority women here go out at the weekend or on public holidays in groups, either with a family member or with friends and I've found myself having to wait more than 5 minutes even on a Saturday afternoon in the busiest part of town before I spot a girl on her own to approach. I strongly suspect that I'm going to have to learn to open sets involving more than one girl if I'm to increase the efficiency of what I'm doing, at least in terms of finding enough sets in day to approach.

Could anybody on here tell me whether 65 approaches to obtain a date with a new girl using a direct opener is way off base, even for a relative newbie such as myself? I really need to work out if there's a way of optimising what I'm doing, in terms of the number of approaches to conversion to date ratio, if I'm not to end up in danger of just burning myself out.