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What is the heaviest lizard you banged
#1

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Inspired by the tall lizard thread, I decided to spawn this one. The heaviest lizard I banged was 280lbs (20 stones for my Brit posse). She was 5'11 so I eyeballed her at around 240lbs, I had no idea her bones were so dense <<Is this me justifying it hahahaha! The weight seemed to be spread evenly through her tits and other delectable regions.

What about you guys? What's the heaviest lizard you've poked?

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#2

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Not sure how you got it up for a heifer that large Moma, I know you like thick women but she sounds like she wouldn't look out of place in the front row of the scrum at Twickenham this Saturday [Image: smile.gif]
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#3

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

hahahahaha@front row of the scrum in Twickenham, I am finished lololololol

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Love 'em or leave 'em but we can't live without lizardsssss..

An Ode To Lizards
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#4

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Lizards...

[Image: laugh3.gif]

Gets me every time.

The public will judge a man by what he lifts, but those close to him will judge him by what he carries.
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#5

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Oh dear........

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#6

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Counting the wheelchair? 220lbs

The harder you practice, the luckier you get.
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#7

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

When I was younger, more beta, and had lower standards I harpooned a few land-whales and still have PTSD over it to this day.
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#8

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

280?....good lord...this is what comes to mind





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#9

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Personally I can't say for certain as I didn't have them get on a scale, but two stick out in my mind and they were easily 200lbs+.

I'm sickened by that fact alone and don't want to know what their exact weight was.

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#10

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

I have no idea how much she weighed, but the poossy was hidden within folds of flesh. It was such a turn-off! I get the creeps just thinking about it. She was wet as ocean though, lol
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#11

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

220. I only know this because she got into a heated argument with my roommate. She was a die hard feminist, and when she pulled out her sparkly pink phone, he cracked a joke about feminists not being allowed to have pink phones so as not to fold to society's expectations. She then went into a massive tirade, then the argument steered to this:

Him: There are clear differences between men and women. To play defensive end in the NFL, you need to be at least 220 pounds.
Her: I weigh 220!
Him: So you're telling me you could play in the NFL?
Her: Yes!

To be honest, she wore it well. There were no rolls, she was just thick with a big juicy ass. I never saw her after that night because she eventually stormed off and called me an asshole for sitting back and laughing as my roommate steamrolled her.
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#12

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

She was somewhere between 160-180. She wore it well though with huge titties and a phat ass. Also 5'11 which Im sure added to the weight.

I bet most men have fucked a girl that was heavier than they thought especially if it was a tall girl. All that extra bone mass adds up. Obviously there are biological differences but I was tall and super skinny in high school but weighed in at 190lbs. Theres no reason why a 6'3 college volleball girl can't weigh in at north of 155 especially if she's a leaper and double-especially if she's got a muscular upper body build. Gotta remember muscle is denser than fat.

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#13

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

She's not a lady if she's under 280...
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#14

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Unless a girl is thin she is usually pretty bashful about how much she weighs - that and I never bring up girl's weight unless they are thin. I've banged a few fatties in my day. Heaviest one I'd have to estimate around 200+ lbs. Kinda gross that I've banged a girl that weighs more than me but it is what it is.

Quote: (02-01-2017 07:27 AM)Moma Wrote:  

The heaviest lizard I banged was 280lbs (20 stones for my Brit posse). She was 5'11 so I eyeballed her at around 240lbs, I had no idea her bones were so dense <<Is this me justifying it hahahaha! The weight seemed to be spread evenly through her tits and other delectable regions.

At just shy of 300 bones there is no way she did not look fucking obese. C'mon man!
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#15

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Quote: (02-01-2017 02:38 PM)wi30 Wrote:  

She's not a lady if she's under 280...

I have a friend that lives by this

"Feminism is a trade union for ugly women"- Peregrine
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#16

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Hate to admit it, but unfortunately I've bested moma's record. I've slayed some literal land whales back in the day.

David took his men with him and went out and killed two hundred Philistines and brought back their foreskins. They counted out the full number to the king so that David might become the king's son-in-law. Then Saul gave him his daughter Michal in marriage. 1 Samuel 18:27
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#17

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

This should have been a poll.
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#18

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Quote: (02-01-2017 12:17 PM)Serious Sam Wrote:  

220. I only know this because she got into a heated argument with my roommate. She was a die hard feminist, and when she pulled out her sparkly pink phone, he cracked a joke about feminists not being allowed to have pink phones so as not to fold to society's expectations. She then went into a massive tirade, then the argument steered to this:

Him: There are clear differences between men and women. To play defensive end in the NFL, you need to be at least 220 pounds.
Her: I weigh 220!
Him: So you're telling me you could play in the NFL?
Her: Yes!

[Image: bertz.gif]
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#19

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

In my younger days I have to admit to a few dragons that were probably around the 190-220 range.
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#20

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

"Ain't no fun-dy if they ain't two hun-dy"

Mine was "Big Beth", 5'10", two bills easy, with huge titties. I used to love curling up in those things and taking a snooze.
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#21

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Hang on a minute, I'll ask her...

They who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety- Benjamin Franklin, as if you didn't know...
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#22

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

Quote: (02-02-2017 03:28 PM)lex the impaler Wrote:  

Hate to admit it, but unfortunately I've bested moma's record. I've slayed some literal land whales back in the day.
With all due respect, bro - that is seriously f#cked up
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#23

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

We've all done things we weren't proud of as beginners. Anyone who tells you otherwise is full of it.

Thankfully though the heaviest girl I've ever banged was actually in great shape. She was just tall as fuck.
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#24

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

250 lbs chick, 5'11, solid 5 about 10 years ago. Not my proudest bang but I learned not to bang severely overweight chicks after that bad sex.
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#25

What is the heaviest lizard you banged

I knew this was a Moma post before my eyes focused and read the title or the poster clearly. I just knew it.
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