[realologist]

It's better.

Don't really get the self Summary part.

The favorite books, movie, food part would be great if you got off the human flesh joke.

Rethink the 6 things you could do without. Make it the most ridiculous things you can think of.

Make sure to always work on and tweak to see what gets you the most responses.

[crispytaco]

How is it going? Don't forget to have pro pictures if possible

[h5757]

(01-22-2017 09:29 PM)crispytaco Wrote:  

How is it going? Don't forget to have pro pictures if possible

I'm actually getting a higher response rate and more attractive women are responding. You guys gave great advice.

[Remington]

(01-25-2017 12:19 AM)h5757 Wrote:  

(01-22-2017 09:29 PM)crispytaco Wrote:  

How is it going? Don't forget to have pro pictures if possible

I'm actually getting a higher response rate and more attractive women are responding. You guys gave great advice.

How about your conversions? Are you translating these conversations into numbers/dates/bangs?

[h5757]

I haven’t seen a change in conversion to dates yet. I think the main reason might be because I have a habit of messaging back and forth for too long and I’ve read that women lose interest after a while. Part of it is anxiety but I also feel like I have to establish some comfort before I ask for their number, so I’m not sure when the ideal time to ask is. I also want to find out whether I have any chemistry with them before making an effort to go out on a date with them because I don’t want to risk going on an awkward date. Although I might just be coming up with excuses because of my anxiety.

Another reason might be that most of the women I’ve been recently messaging live up to 40 miles away (there aren’t any women who I’m interested in who are close by that I haven’t messaged already). Although I don’t know how much that amount of distance factors into whether women want to meet you or not. Then obviously, there’s my photos and the messages themselves. I’ve been on okcupid for about a month and I’ve gotten one date so far, so my photos can’t be that bad (she was 36, but she wasn’t overweight at all and she was attractive and looked young).

[Latan]

Thanks for the feedback OP.

(01-28-2017 05:49 PM)h5757 Wrote:  

I haven’t seen a change in conversion to dates yet. I think the main reason might be because I have a habit of messaging back and forth for too long and I’ve read that women lose interest after a while.

Yes, exchange a couple of light & funny messages, then ask them out.
It shows confidence, and that you know what you want : real pussy, not internet talk.

(01-28-2017 05:49 PM)h5757 Wrote:  

I also feel like I have to establish some comfort before I ask for their number, so I’m not sure when the ideal time to ask is.

In my experience, you don't have to ask for the number every time.
I propose to have a drink (Must be in the same day / following day, so she won't have the time to lose interest), then if she wants to switch numbers I agree.
Most of the time, I don't even have her number, as I'm confident my online messages were interesting enough to make her come.
It also prevent (some) from flaking at the last minute, as she doesn't have my number.
(I still get flaked on, but that's the number game)

(01-28-2017 05:49 PM)h5757 Wrote:  

I also want to find out whether I have any chemistry with them before making an effort to go out on a date with them because I don’t want to risk going on an awkward date. Although I might just be coming up with excuses because of my anxiety.

Don't see these meet ups as "dates".
Don't come with anything in mind : maybe she'll be unattractive, maybe she'll smell, maybe she doesn't shave, maybe she's a cunt, maybe she doesn't know how to talk in person, maybe she's crazy, ...
You can't know if you'll enjoy her company before you see her in person, and no amount of online messaging will change that.
Meet with her as soon as possible, see if you click in person.
Many girls know how to chat online, but can't hold a simple conversation.

(01-28-2017 05:49 PM)h5757 Wrote:  

Another reason might be that most of the women I’ve been recently messaging live up to 40 miles away (there aren’t any women who I’m interested in who are close by that I haven’t messaged already).

Do you live in a little city? Then can't help you, as I don't have any experience with this situation.
If not, you could use different websites : if OKC doesn't work for you try their competition.
Lots of girls are on every main dating websites anyway.

[realologist]

A good way to solve the mileage issue is set up dates with multiple chicks from the same city the same day. Rent a hotel and say you're staying in the city for a night. That way you cover for flakes and you can cancel the other dates if you find a girl you like better or have a chance for bangs.

[jabbaworx]

(01-13-2017 09:39 PM)h5757 Wrote:  

A problem I’m having frequently is that after I send a message to a woman that’s tailored to her profile, they’ll visit my profile, but they don’t respond to my message. I don’t know whether my profile or my photos are causing the problem (or both). The age of the women I message is anywhere from mid 20s to mid 30s. I’m in my early 30s.

This is my profile for okcupid:

My self-summary
Hi there. I’m from [city]. I’m working in [pharmaceutical job] blah blah this sounds like a cover letter. Yeah, I suck at writing cover letters.

My Myers-Briggs type is "oh, this looks interesting...wait, how long is this thing!?"

What I’m doing with my life
Doing [pharmaceutical work] for [disease] at a [pharmaceutical company]. It’s different from what I studied in college ([very slightly related science major]) and I totally wouldn’t have expected to be doing this, but it ended up being the right choice because I love my job and have the best coworkers.

I’m really good at
Doing impersonations (especially English and Irish accents).

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Music: Mainly indie rock, indie pop, punk and electronic.

Movies: I like many different genres, but my favorites are horror and sci-fi.

TV shows: Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad, Boardwalk Empire, The Sopranos, The Wire, Homeland, Key and Peele and many more.

Food: Human flesh. Other favorites include Thai, Mediterranean, Italian and Mexican food. An honorable mention goes to gourmet burgers and sweet potato fries. I’m honestly up for anything.

The six things I could never do without
Food…water…look at this wit! Since it asks for 6, I’ll add caffeine (specifically coffee or black tea), internet, car and cell phone to the list.

On a typical Friday night I am
Friday nights are spent relaxing at home because I’m usually too exhausted to go out after work. On the rare occasion though, I might rob a bank. Weekends are spent either out with friends or watching movies and TV shows at home.

------------

What am I doing right and what am I doing wrong? What should I keep or remove? What would you guys have put for those questions?

bare with me, and take whatever i say with a pinch of salt

you're trying to achieve a bit of "edge" eg human flesh, the wit aspect, get rid of that, don't put any fucking effort into this whatsoever

don't talk about being exhausted on a friday night.

as for your music bit, choose 2-3 bands artists and talk about them, link a song or album. dont list genres

hope you see the appeal in my advice, thanks bud

[h5757]

I think it might be my messages that are the problem. Everything was going well (she even complimented my profile) and then she just stopped messaging me. Can you guys give me some input regarding this exchange:

Me: Since you said you're able to turn off what makes you stressed, I wanted your advice on something: where can I find the power button for work stress? ba-dum-tsh

Her: You're profile is absolutely charming and witty. I definitely can say that I'm interested in getting to know you.

Me: How was your weekend? Anything interesting? I spent the entire weekend watching rom coms and crying to my favorite scenes (don’t judge). Okay, I kid (about both the rom coms and crying). But hopefully not liking rom coms isn’t a deal breaker for you.

Her: My weekend was mostly quiet. I had dance rehearsal that went really late on Friday then I slept in Saturday. I helped my mom clean some of the garage and front yard Saturday. But today....I managed to stay in my pajamas all day long which never happens but I'm happy to have relaxed. I start the spring semester tomorrow. How was your weekend? And I suppose that not liking rom coms won't be a deal breaker lol!

Me: My weekend was mostly relaxing and I had some much-needed me time. I spent Saturday looking for new shoes and I found two that I like. But I’m buying them online instead of in the store. I don’t know how much that pisses off store employees, so I always tell them that I’m having troubling deciding which shoe to buy, but I’ll be back to buy one when I make a decision (never happens, harhar). Actually, one time I did buy a pair of shoes in the store within the last year. What are you studying in school for your MA program? What classes are you taking?

[RunsWithScissors]

I would have asked her out for a drink right after she said she was definitely interested in getting to know you. That conversation is too wordy and drags on too long without going anywhere.

Some definite improvements in your latest profile over the original, well done and keep tweaking it.

[zeitgenosse]

(02-03-2017 11:40 AM)h5757 Wrote:  

I think it might be my messages that are the problem.

.....


Me: My weekend was mostly relaxing and I had some much-needed me time. I spent Saturday looking for new shoes and I found two that I like. But I’m buying them online instead of in the store. I don’t know how much that pisses off store employees, so I always tell them that I’m having troubling deciding which shoe to buy, but I’ll be back to buy one when I make a decision (never happens, harhar). Actually, one time I did buy a pair of shoes in the store within the last year. What are you studying in school for your MA program? What classes are you taking?

Yes they are the problem. You are talking to much, and you are far too much honest. You can t make a decision while buying some shoes. Think about it. What will she think about you, now? That you will bang her with no doubt ...

[whiteknightrises]

(01-16-2017 05:55 PM)XXL Wrote:  

Scrolling through 2 pages - no pics

Don't expect you to identify yourself but that's the most important part

[questor70]

What's really annoying is I had a woman message me on POF and even though she works only one town over from me she went silent when I tried to steer things to an icebreaker and avoid it falling into pen-pal.

I think a lot of women approach online dating as a way to minimize physical interactions--just keep it electronic as long as possible. Gamify it. Read between the lines. Look for red flags (real or imaginary). This ultimately leads to endless A.D.D. style window-shopping.

I'm just not so sure there's a way to craft a profile or the early interactions in order to prevent these sorts of false-starts. At some point it's not about us. It's them.

I don't care if a guy pushes all the right buttons, it still is no guarantee that the icebreaker will go well or that the relationship downstream will work out. Guys adept at online game aren't necessarily better partners. Women are simply asking too much of technology as a screening tool.

[Harami]

you should really find better friends who can show you how to crack a good joke. Your sense of humor is way off, let alone being witty. you may think you're funny, your nerd friends may think your funny but in the real world, not so much.

[Maxzilla]

It's 2017 and the OP still doesn't know it's all about looks/photos? Give this guy a medal

Anyway, to answer your question

Being Good Looking = you have a good profile

Being Ugly = you have a bad profile

The end