So much of game just comes down to thinking as little as possible. When I think less, not only do I conserve energy and have more fun, but I also game better. I strongly feel there is a cause and effect relationship there, but I cannot prove it. This is probably why alcohol works - it has the effect of making one think less.
Lately, I have been doing the opposite and it has been driving me crazy. It has been four weeks since I shot my load, and all I can think about is just that. I thought this strong sexual desire would take my game to stratospheric levels, but it is having the opposite effect. I am thinking too much and not only losing the set but also getting agitated.
My desire to fuck is creating an outcome dependency in my head. Then my scatter brain is going in all kinds of directions to figure out how to achieve this outcome - should I make up stories to sound bad ass, should I resort to online dating, should I read random forum posts and watch videos to learn better techniques, should I find a wing to night game with, etc... while it is good that I am finding the energy to dedicate to game, it is bad because I am channeling this energy in the wrong way. It is only a downward spiral from here - information overload. I have been there before.
I need to instead channel my energy in surrendering to the process and letting the chips fall where they may. As hard as it is to say right now, I need to learn to control my sexual urge and maintain a mindset where I have zero expectations from girls. I need to surrender to the process when it is hardest to do so. I am not going to fap, but damn... this is not only testing my willpower but also my ability to maintain outcome independence. It is much easier to not care when I am not horny.
The only thing I can do is cold approach at least 10 times a day. That is the only part of my game which is in my absolute control. If that does not go anywhere, it is okay. It is part of the game. Tomorrow is a new day. Building an organic skill takes time, like growing a plant. Today's minds have been conditioned to want instant gratification and immediate answers; my mind has also been inflicted with this disease. But I need to trust that the process of simply approaching diligently is going to eventually work. I cannot force it, and I absolutely cannot "think my way to success". I must fight the urge to take shortcuts, especially when my urge is strongest like now.
One immediate benefit of this mentality is the burden it lifts off my shoulders. By defining "success" as accomplishing what is in my control, regardless of outcome, I am setting my self up for highest likelihood of success. A bad outcome won't effect me as much, a good outcome won't effect me as much - I will be a steady sail. I will have more energy to devote to the work, to the process. I won't be distracted and derailed by events outside my control. Life will be simpler. I have always cherished simplicity in my other creative and physical pursuits... why not game.
DH
Lately, I have been doing the opposite and it has been driving me crazy. It has been four weeks since I shot my load, and all I can think about is just that. I thought this strong sexual desire would take my game to stratospheric levels, but it is having the opposite effect. I am thinking too much and not only losing the set but also getting agitated.
My desire to fuck is creating an outcome dependency in my head. Then my scatter brain is going in all kinds of directions to figure out how to achieve this outcome - should I make up stories to sound bad ass, should I resort to online dating, should I read random forum posts and watch videos to learn better techniques, should I find a wing to night game with, etc... while it is good that I am finding the energy to dedicate to game, it is bad because I am channeling this energy in the wrong way. It is only a downward spiral from here - information overload. I have been there before.
I need to instead channel my energy in surrendering to the process and letting the chips fall where they may. As hard as it is to say right now, I need to learn to control my sexual urge and maintain a mindset where I have zero expectations from girls. I need to surrender to the process when it is hardest to do so. I am not going to fap, but damn... this is not only testing my willpower but also my ability to maintain outcome independence. It is much easier to not care when I am not horny.
The only thing I can do is cold approach at least 10 times a day. That is the only part of my game which is in my absolute control. If that does not go anywhere, it is okay. It is part of the game. Tomorrow is a new day. Building an organic skill takes time, like growing a plant. Today's minds have been conditioned to want instant gratification and immediate answers; my mind has also been inflicted with this disease. But I need to trust that the process of simply approaching diligently is going to eventually work. I cannot force it, and I absolutely cannot "think my way to success". I must fight the urge to take shortcuts, especially when my urge is strongest like now.
One immediate benefit of this mentality is the burden it lifts off my shoulders. By defining "success" as accomplishing what is in my control, regardless of outcome, I am setting my self up for highest likelihood of success. A bad outcome won't effect me as much, a good outcome won't effect me as much - I will be a steady sail. I will have more energy to devote to the work, to the process. I won't be distracted and derailed by events outside my control. Life will be simpler. I have always cherished simplicity in my other creative and physical pursuits... why not game.
DH
