[augen sehen]

When you guys have an interest in a girl, and see her texting other guys and having fun conversations... how do you deal? Especially when you haven't smashed yet.

EDIT: My bad, sorry if this is low content. I know that McQueen had a whole article and story on why to never look through her phone because that's a bad path to go down. I just can't control these feelings I get, like I'm not good enough, or if she's having fun talking to some other guy, what will actually make her like me more.

It's mainly feelings of my own inadequacy, I guess.

[Serious Sam]

Are you dating her or is she simply a girl you want to fuck?

EDIT: Nevermind. I read a bit too quickly at first. To answer your question, though, what does it matter? She's single and attractive, so of course she's going to gain interest from other guys.

You are way too needy. Practice abundance. She's only one girl. There are plenty more to be had.

And why the fuck are you going through her phone?

[kaotic]

Here's a great start for searching the forum:

https://cse.google.com/cse?cx=0126445502...gsc.page=1


Now onto your statement:

Yes this apart of your inadequacies, your confidence, game, and frame.

But let's dive deeper:

You're interested in this girl, does she know you're interested ?
If yes, have you been on a date ?
If yes, how many dates ?

If no to the questions above, then you can't sit here and complain about her. She's free do what she wants, it ain't your pussy at all.

If yes to the questions above, you need to take that pussy off that pedestal. You should be chasing other girls also.

If you're dating her, she sure as hell shouldn't be texting other guys.

If you've just been on a few dates, she's going to be looking at options, why aren't you hitting up other girls also ?

Answer the questions above and I can ask better questions and give you better advice.

[CarCrashKid]

I blow it off. I used to get worried about it but then I realised that most of the time, it was her friends she was talking to. Even if it isn't, I don't bother wasting my time on it.

Keep her engaged. You are present in that moment and those kids on the phone aren't.
Take that advantage from them.

[General Stalin]

You can't control women. You can't control who she talks to, who she is attracted to, who likes her IG pictures, who inboxes her, who hits up her dating profile.

The power you do have is the power the control yourself. You can control your interaction with her, and if you don't like how things are going then you can bounce.

There is a girl I have been seeing recently and I caught myself worrying about other dude's she is talking to and possibly going on dates with/hooking up with. Then I realized "Well fuck, I'm talking to other girls, I'm going on dates with other girls, and I'm banging other girls..."

[brick tamland]

OP if possible , at some point in the near future you should go through the phones of the girls you are dating. Yes it will probably trouble and disturb you, but you'll learn a lot about the opposite sex.

To answer your question if you're certain she's texting other guys, let it be water off a duck's back. Almost all of them do it. Part of learning game for me has been discovering 'girl game'. They always keep themselves AVAILABLE. She's texting different guys because she's juggling the heaps of attention she's getting. She's a fish in the dating pool and you can be sure one of the guys she's texting in front of you is about to hook her. Girls have their dating life planned out well in advance. I'd go so far as to say most of them know in advance who their next 2 or 3 boyfriends will be.

As for the discourteous texting in front of you, it's really simple. Do you enjoy being in the company of someone (anyone) doing that, when you have set aside time to be with them? Think beyond her looks.

[XXL]

Depends on the situation. In general, the less personal conversation we have the less it matters that she's texting. If we're together one on one [like a date] then it's a problem, not because she's texting guys, it's because texting itself is disrespectful. If we're with hanging out with other people in big group then I don't care.

Second thing, the fact that it's the other guys she's texting doesn't matter at all. If it matters to you then never show it. Never show you're sweating. Keep the frame that you're the fucking shit and no guy can come even close to you. Whether it's obectively true or not DOES NOT MATTER. Just do it with blind faith. Show that you do not give a flying fuck about it. Believe me, you do it like that you have the biggest shot to actually outframe her. You can even nonchalantly ask about the guy as if you want to help with something. You can use some boyfriend destroyers if you really want to subtly outgame him. But in general view him as if he's zero competition lame wuss and act accordingly.

[Moto]

I recently ended my LTR, and this issue was one of the reasons (not the only one). She insisted on maintaining her beta orbiters- even going out to dinner with one of them at times- and responding via text to a guy who was shamelessly, relentless, and directly hitting on her (over the course of weeks). She disqualified him because he's supposedly only 18. Shit, when I was 19 or 20 I was banging older women in their mid 20s, so that doesn't mean anything.

She even gave a veiled threat when I called her on it: "If I wanted to cheat, you would never know his name" or something like that.

It's something you've gotta put up with in the early stages of courtship, but I feel it is crossing the line when in a LTR. When I think about things like this it puts any doubts to rest that I may have made a wrong decision.

[kaotic]

(12-09-2016 07:52 AM)Moto Wrote:  

I recently ended my LTR, and this issue was one of the reasons (not the only one). She insisted on maintaining her beta orbiters- even going out to dinner with one of them at times- and responding via text to a guy who was shamelessly, relentless, and directly hitting on her (over the course of weeks). She disqualified him because he's supposedly only 18. Shit, when I was 19 or 20 I was banging older women in their mid 20s, so that doesn't mean anything.

She even gave a veiled threat when I called her on it: "If I wanted to cheat, you would never know his name" or something like that.

It's something you've gotta put up with in the early stages of courtship, but I feel it is crossing the line when in a LTR. When I think about things like this it puts any doubts to rest that I may have made a wrong decision.

NEVER, you never have to put up with anything, including shit like that.

You're just letting yourself to put up with that sort of thing.

Flip the script - she should be the one accepting of your antics because she should be chasing YOU.

I would never ever put up with that, if she didn't listen to me twice about texting other dudes she's gone.

If she made that veiled thread to me, on the spot I would've dumped her, no questions asked.

You learned your lesson about shady women, that's good, BUT, you need to learn to never put up with that shit and assuming "oh it's just part of the courtship" because it isn't AT ALL.

[Mufasa]

XXL had a great post on a similar topic of being aware of another man.

Depending upon what you know about her situation how you spin it is up for debate.
Some real good shit went down in there on flipping the situation.

(11-24-2016 04:21 PM)XXL Wrote:  

OK we have a winner.

WIA Wrote:

Basically the chick wants adventure from you, and stability from him.

Overall strategy - Push her towards that guy by extolling his great qualities.

1) Disqualify yourself - "you know it, and I know it, i'm bad news. We're going to fuck, and you're going to cry your eyes out"

2) Overqualify the other guy - "Derek? he's a great guy, he's got everything going for him. He's going to provide a good life for you, marriage, children babies. He's nice to you. He'll do everything for you...." Run down the list of stable beta provider traits that are socially approved - that are also proven to turn girls off.

3) She's either going to dis him, and say he's not that nice. Or she's going to entirely believe you, and realize that's not what she wants.

So...

Basically, it such situation the girl is playing every guy talking to her [including me] cause she enjoys the attention and wants to get a bit of everything. So as long as every guy continues to do what he's doing she's satisfied. That means that pattern has to broken. Fast.

To win the game is not to play.

However I cannot turn into fucking shmuck which means I gotta do what I do, but a bit differently. Instead of pumping her emotions in entertaining way I gotta go more cruel and push her buttons. Not playing here means to disqualify yourself hard to make her feel not wanted so she feels the need to chase the validation back. Then to use infamous boyfriend destroyers to put an idea in her head against her will [full inception mode] that she's actually put off by him.

How to disqualify:
+ We would fight like cats and dogs and I would always win
+ I'm looking for a sugar mommy, I'd spend all your cash and never do shit for you
+ You’re too much of a good girl for me….and you wouldn't take my shit I wouldn't take yours
+ I'm sure there are tons of guys dying to meet you on the internet…
+ Chill out I'm not for you, stop trying and just be cool
+ You’re really cute… Too bad your not my type
+ You can so help me pick up chicks…Get your ass over here I want a hug ….Ok get off me, you will scare away all the hot chicks.

Then we add Boyfriend destroyers. It's all about discrediting other guy's game [especially when he's playing the potential BF card] by pointing out his flaws in a very sneaky way, and those are jealousy, neediness, failure to commit, abusive behavior, lack of passion.

Tyler D. Wrote:

That being said, u should NEVER EVER speak badly about the BF that will only get the HB in a defensive and aggressive state and u will be bringing them closer together. Instead u speak highly of him describe him as being the most perfect man/BF in the world then something strange will happen she will start disqualifying him(don't worry if she only says one bad thing it's enough) that's when u resist the urge to Disqualify him again and u DEFEND him in a way making him the insecure person in the hole world, u need to go total AFC to do this.

Jealousy:
"You have to understand that this guy really appreciates you, because you're probably the best girl that he ever got, or ever will get. I know that... you care about this guy (maybe sp)... but there's just a certain equilibrium where if you've done this guy a favour by being with him and he's not equipped to handle it, since he knows that he'll never get a girl like you again if he walks out, that he's just constantly frustrated and panicked that you'll leave. It's not his fault.

Neediness:
"You've got to understand that for this guy you are his entire world. He cares about you so much, that everything else in the world is meaningless to him. You are his only source of pleasure, and without you he knows that. ..he's nothing. You can't blame him, he just doesn't have anything else going for him, so he needs you."

Failure to commit:
"It's not that this guy doesn't love you. He does. Its just that deep down he has a fear that... you're too good for him... and that you'll realize it and be like, you know....you just have to dump this guy.... and then he'll be left emotionally destroyed because he made himself vulnerable. Yes yes I know that you wouldn't do that to him, but its just that with he knows that you could get other guys (SP)...like me...I just think that he's not an emotionally secure person, and you've gotta cut him some slack."

Abusive behaviour:
"It's not that this guy doesn't love you. Its that he loves you too much, and just can't handle it. He's not emotionally available, and because he knows that you're the best he's ever had, he can't handle all of these things that he's going through emotionally. All his life he probably wasn't very good with women, and women weren't interested in him.. So now that he's got this girl, he doesn't know how to handle it.

Being too predictable, not passionate:
"Its not that this guy doesn't love you. He does. Its just that he's so comfortable with you now.. and feels so close to you, that you're more like a sister to him.. Like a special sister, but someone who he doesn't feel that he has to do all these things for anymore, because your relationship is so secure and so predictable.. there's no need for all that excitement, because he knows that nothing will change.. Some guys deal with true love that way.. I dunno, for me, I think that if you really love someone, you have to keep it fresh. But really, its not that he doesn't love you, its just that he loves you so much that he doesn't see the need."

That brought back some memories.. I love the game

Thank you very much for attention.

(11-24-2016 05:25 PM)XXL Wrote:  

(11-24-2016 04:35 PM)Mufasa Wrote:  

Yalls game is on some other shit man. You gotta have some experience to realize all of those things from analyzing the situation. Needless to say I'll have an idea of how to be prepared if this happens now. I actually have a girl doing this shit RIGHT NOW. lol. going to put this into practice asap.

So question for XXL and WIA, can these disqualifiers be executed via text message convo or are they only effective face to face? And how do I bring up the other guy without coming across as needy?

Thanks XXL, great post.

Yeah I had SOME [hehe] experiences, I'm guessing WIA wasn't born yesterday either

It all comes from first hand experiences. That's how we learn right? By doing what we read about. That's the beauty of game, you can read some shit and then materialize it in real life and then guess what, you looking at this perfect ass from behind and you can't believe you're inside it just because you used what you learned by stumbling upon some articles on internet by accident. That's how it started.

Can these disqualifiers be executed via text message convo or are they only effective face to face?

It can be used anywhere you want. It actually depends on you because those lines and scripts will evoke emotions and provoke certain responses, often automatic ones. So if don't think fast on your feet and have something to say to the girl's response then I think it's better to use those in text at first since you have more time to respond there and you're not put on the spot right?

In some way it's actually very beneficial to text some of those as girl can then read it again and again as she goes through the texting messages with you. Girls do it like that.

Disqualifying is like negging but more subtle and sneaky. You pull away validation. Not even in direct way by dismissing her but by letting her know you don't want her and you do it ON YOUR TERMS. That's why it's cool. You're not rejected. She think she's in the game waiting for you to chase her ass and beat her shittests and all of a sudden you're rejecting yourself as if you saw something in her that you hate. You snip this nice warm thrills of validation she's feeling inside. You create a vacuum between you and her this way. There's a tension in the air then. Yet you're still there in front of her talking flirting teasing negging disqualifying push/pulling touching etc so the source of validation is still right next to her [or one call away]. So she feels this tension in the air, she feel invalidated and she has a chance to get it back. That's how she starts investing. The more she invests the more wants it and she's in that spiral hardcore. The final validation step is your 8===D.

And how do I bring up the other guy without coming across as needy?

I don't really understand this question. You do it casually, like you're commenting something on TV. For example, a girl mentions a guy and you go "oh yeah i heard about him we have some mutual friends, you're in great hands but I kind of feel sorry for you at the same time". she of course go "what? why?". you say "ah nothing it's just you have no idea how this guy appreciates you, you're probably the best girl that he ever got, or ever will get. if you do him a favor by being with him he might not be able to handle it, since he knows that he'll never get a girl like you, i'm guessing he might be constantly frustrated and panicked that you'll leave him, i mean it's not his fault, he's crazy about you as far as I know, I just don't think it's healthy.. just saying. But don't worry love conquers all so all is good. Oh look, have you ever seen.. [you change topic so that she has no time to process it in her head which will cause her to process it later on her own where she will add her own thoughts to it and it will snowball into this big fucking problem in her head and attach it to him]."

Something like that. If you don't know the guy then let her speak a bit about him so that you can pinpoint his weaknesses and comment on that. So in that case this comment would look like this:

...a girl mentions a guy and you go "really? no way.. i know those i had few friends like him, you're in great hands but I kind of feel sorry for you at the same time"...

So you don't 'prepare' her for your spiel. You just throw it out there when she starts talking about different guy and you tell her that in matter of fact way, no excitement or anything