[Ouroboros]

Hey guys,

This is my first post here and it concerns a topic that has often concerned me: how much must a player know about the trivial world of pop culture in order to engage in conversation with the average girl?
Although they are generally ignorant when it comes to topics of substance (history, science, politics, philosophy etc.) I've noticed they often have an encyclopaedic knowledge of movies, music and celebrities, created by a lifetime of passively consuming entertainment. If one opts to pursue a more fulfilling life of activity, hobbies, and travel, one will necessarily lack this knowledge and will therefore not comprehend meta references (sadly a social DHV in many circles) and will have less common interests to talk about.
How do you deal with this? Persistently change the subject to something else? Try to keep up with all the latest pop culture? (an endless task)
Or has no one else had this issue...?

[WestIndianArchie]

Not engaging with the what the rest of the world is engaging with shows your overall lack of social awareness.

That mindset is harmful to your game for the vast majority of 18-24 year old hotties.
Further, you have less material with which to engage

This basically limits your target audience....If you play it straight.

But this is a very common issue for
- know it all nerds coming into the game
- folks on the autism spectrum
- guys too old to be up on pop culture

It's a lot like music or dancing, I recommend against that stuff it's not truly your interest. There is nothing more pathetic than some old guy name dropping Bruno Mars.

You win this battle on frame.
You win this battle by focusing on differences

You don't win this battle on content.
As a general rule in life, never go head to head with someone on a frontal attack.

Remember that this is not a problem, but an opportunity to show personality, show value. She's giving you a gift.

Run your regular game.
If she goes pop culture on you...

Chica - "I love this Bieber song with Major Lazer"

The guy without game tries to seek common ground with the girl.

The player uses their differences to his advantage. The player realized early on, that talking to a girl is not like making an argument in debate club.

"You would like this Justin Timberlake song."

(Notice I said Timberlake not Bieber)

A chick is going to pay attention to the

"You would like"
"You're the type of girl that would like..."
"I totally had you pegged as a chick who..."

Whatever the broad says to a player, he takes the content and tells her it says something about her character.

I'm an accountant.
Where are your friends?
How old are you?
You're not rich

^ you would ask that question. You would say that.

During the attraction stage of the chat, you're trying to get at her emotions and play with those. It's more than jokes or common ground.

Indeed, the character accusation based on content is just one way (of many)to deal with pop culture dissonance.

The game lessons are
- to not take her that seriously.
- see these situations as opportunities
- focus on dealing with her emotionally, not logically

WIA

[Ouroboros]

Thanks for the response WIA.
I can see that maybe I'm placing too much emphasis on wanting common ground with girls. This actually raises an interesting question - to what extent do girls even want to share common interests with guys? Many of them are interested in fashion, dance, gossip etc., but I imagine a guy with the same interests would seem effeminate/repulsive (although some obviously like dancers). Similarly, surely an active guy with experiences would seem more appealing than a couch potato who watches TV/movies all the time? (I should mention I don't actually dislike entertainment, I just think my generation - millennials - way overdo it)
I like the idea of capitalising on polarity, making that in itself material for game. Although I don't understand the significance in your example of incorrectly labelling the musician as Timberlake not Bieber - how does emphasising your ignorance help you in this circumstance? Would she not just call you out on it?

Also: do you think it's in general worth trying to immerse yourself in the interests of others for the sake of game? Spending hours on something that does nothing for you feels like a massive waste, but on the other hand networking, game and socialising are obviously very fulfilling and necessary, and these are often based on shared interests (e.g. the hipsters' love for obscure bands) - where does one draw the line between staying true to oneself and conforming to herd mentality?

[sterling_archer]

Interesting thread, will follow this discussion.

[XPQ22]

While it helps to have a little common ground, I've easily spun this bug into a feature on some occasions.

I met up with a girl over the summer about ten years younger than myself, and she's rattling off movies while I'm looking at her with an amused/puzzled look on my face.

"So you've honestly never seen 'Snatch'?"

"Can't say that I have. I think I sort of gave up on film after around 1999. I'm more into 'old' sci-fi, like the Matrix, you know?"

"Ohmahgawd, you have to see it, it's so good."

"Sometimes it's hard for me to fit the time in to really enjoy a good movie. It's a lot of work pulling the Betamax player out of the closet and hooking it up."

"Haha, I haven't dealt with videotape in a long time. But I still keep a ton of DVDs at home."

"Including that one?"

"Of course! I can't believe you haven't seen it."

"Well we'd better fix this, then. I'm not sure when I'll have another chance."

And then it was off to her place. We made it about halfway through before hitting her bedroom.

I don't know if there's a term for this - "Awakenings" game, maybe?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Awakenings

As an older guy you could think of yourself as a curious visitor from another time. Girls love to play show and tell; all your points of ignorance are just great opportunities to end up back at her place.

[WestIndianArchie]

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

Thanks for the response WIA.
I can see that maybe I'm placing too much emphasis on wanting common ground with girls.

Most guys do.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

This actually raises an interesting question - to what extent do girls even want to share common interests with guys?

To a girl, what's hers is hers, what's yours is hers..if she wants it.

Girls did not want to be computer programmers when I was growing up. To be realistic, most boys didn't either. But now that programming is trendy (not just lucrative) girls want to be involved.

Comic books and nerd stuff in general has become infested with girls who won't be there when it's out of fashion.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

Similarly, surely an active guy with experiences would seem more appealing than a couch potato who watches TV/movies all the time?

But if you look at your own life, you know this belief is yours is not true.

Go to the gym.
How many men are there compared to women?
How many are doing free weights?

When women want shoes or to meet a celebrity. They'll line up around the block.

So it's not like they don't go after they want.

How many single women go to bodybuilding contests? Power lifting...Minor league basketball events? Investment banker conferences?

That should tell you that women don't actually value those things, or guys with those things.

That's why I'm always telling guys to stop focusing on bullshit to attract and retain women. Yet most of this site is about that bullshit.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

(I should mention I don't actually dislike entertainment, I just think my generation - millennials - way overdo it)
I like the idea of capitalising on polarity, making that in itself material for game. Although I don't understand the significance in your example of incorrectly labelling the musician as Timberlake not Bieber - how does emphasising your ignorance help you in this circumstance? Would she not just call you out on it?

1) polarity is a tool to get you to emotional relevance. The currency of the game is being able to take the chick on an emotional journey. Polarity is a tool to wake her up. To get her reacting to you.

2) Timberlake over Bieber

Because the sub communication of the line, of everything that I said in that reply is

I, the man, am judging you.
And that TRIGGERS her vanity.

That's the important part of the line. I could say Justin Trudeau and the important part is me saying that she's a typical broad.

To run game, you have to look below the content.
A bad game teacher says the opener doesn't matter.
A good game teacher tells you that the logical content of opener as not important as the feelings it conveys and the feelings that it evokes.

That's why a guy that's good with game doesn't get trapped in the logic bombs that girls throw at him.

She knows the easiest way to throw a guy off is to insist that 2+2=5.

Girls say nonsensical stuff all day, they do random stuff. They're often impulsive, and make decisions without thinking them through.

That's a feature not a bug.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

Also: do you think it's in general worth trying to immerse yourself in the interests of others for the sake of game?

Spending hours on something that does nothing for you feels like a massive waste,

Wait till you start fucking chicks and come back to me on this.

WIA

[El Padrone]

Chica- I love this Bieber song
Player- What do you love about the song?
Chica- It goes right deep to the essence of relationships. Like Jack and Rose in the Titanic, or The NoteBook kind of relationship. Its just so deep... Yadadada
Player- thats very deep of you. You ever connected with someone like this?
Chica- not really. All the guys just seem so superficial, weak and fake.
(Player sees an amazing opportunity for a quick home run)

[Ice]

Everybody has a different style of course, but for me personally the quote below is not a good approach:

(11-03-2016 05:25 AM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

As an older guy you could think of yourself as a curious visitor from another time. Girls love to play show and tell; all your points of ignorance are just great opportunities to end up back at her place.

I think it's better to present yourself as a person who lives in the now. It's just easier to connect with a girl and find common ground. Also, you can downplay the age difference.

E.g. if the discussion touches on Instagram, you can either say:

a.) "What Instagram, what is that, I don't waste my time with stupid stuff like that. Can you explain to me how that app works, why are you using that app at all etc."

For some people that approach might work, but I think it's better if you can say:

b.) "Oh yeah sure I have Insta, you wanna follow me, my handle is XYZ." Girl: "Oh wow, you have 20k followers. I like your pics, this one looks so cool .. "

Coming back to the OPs question: When I say it's about living in the now, I don't mean that you have follow every celebrity's gossip. It's more about showing that you live in the same world. If she mentions something about Justin Bieber, it's totally cool to say that you don't care about him & don't follow him. You can then instead show her something else that you like and that interests you, but that is from today's time, not something from the 80ies. Of course, it should be something that's cool, not something that is nerdy or science related etc (unless the girl is a nerd too, but very few hot girls are). But since you're interested in travel, you can show her some of your travel pics on Insta, or show her on Youtube some cool travel lifestyle documentaries etc.

What I want to say is that it's not really about Justin Bieber anyway, the main themes are adventure, fashion, style, travel, love, romance, luxury, food, freedom, sex. If you have some cool things to talk about when these topics are brought up (via celebrities like Bieber) then it really doesn't matter if you don't know that particular celebrity she is talking about.

[WestIndianArchie]

(11-03-2016 01:26 PM)El Padrone Wrote:  

Chica- I love this Bieber song
Player- What do you love about the song?
Chica- It goes right deep to the essence of relationships. Like Jack and Rose in the Titanic, or The NoteBook kind of relationship. Its just so deep... Yadadada
Player- thats very deep of you. You ever connected with someone like this?
Chica- not really. All the guys just seem so superficial, weak and fake.
(Player sees an amazing opportunity for a quick home run)

*gets on book waiting list*

WIA

[XXL]

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

I've noticed they often have an encyclopaedic knowledge of movies, music and celebrities, created by a lifetime of passively consuming entertainment. If one opts to pursue a more fulfilling life of activity, hobbies, and travel, one will necessarily lack this knowledge and will therefore not comprehend meta references (sadly a social DHV in many circles) and will have less common interests to talk about.
How do you deal with this? Persistently change the subject to something else? Try to keep up with all the latest pop culture? (an endless task)

You cannot compete with a girl who's life is all about entertainment industry. You cannot play her game. But you can use her domain to game her.

Let's say she says "I love this Bieber song with Major Lazer"

Fine. I say "really? let's see.. sing it for me, come on just a few lines"

She tries to sing. Most probably her singing sucks. Perfect. Great opportunity to tease.

I go "what? this is not even that song, you made up different song with you voice, Justin would be pissed at you for that. I'd definitely would. Who knows maybe I'd find you facebook or twitter and messaged you to never sing that again, or maybe not.."

Oh she would react to that for sure. She would respond giving me even more shit to use "against her". Verbal battle would start but I'd keep it fun and silly, not trying to show her place.

And that's how you do it. You don't need to know shit about what she's saying however the more you know the more you can use to game her.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

I can see that maybe I'm placing too much emphasis on wanting common ground with girls. This actually raises an interesting question - to what extent do girls even want to share common interests with guys?

In my opinion, in terms of interests, hobbies, etc very little.

Women care how you fit their lifestyle in general ie whether they can go out with you, whether they can introduce you to their friends and family, whether you lifestyle is somewhat similar. Things like that.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

Many of them are interested in fashion, dance, gossip etc., but I imagine a guy with the same interests would seem effeminate/repulsive (although some obviously like dancers).

Fine, let them be that way. You don't need to. You can be too but you don't get some kind of special magic points for that.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

Similarly, surely an active guy with experiences would seem more appealing than a couch potato who watches TV/movies all the time? (I should mention I don't actually dislike entertainment, I just think my generation - millennials - way overdo it)

True because active guy is more healthy, masculine, exciting. See the pattern? It all matters how the guy makes them feel. Women do not give a flying fuck HOW you make you look good, strong, masculine. Most of them actually think gym is for retards. But they like to be dominated, carried on, fucked well, etc. They care about what they get out of it. It's pure selfish.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

do you think it's in general worth trying to immerse yourself in the interests of others for the sake of game? Spending hours on something that does nothing for you feels like a massive waste, but on the other hand networking, game and socialising are obviously very fulfilling and necessary, and these are often based on shared interests (e.g. the hipsters' love for obscure bands) - where does one draw the line between staying true to oneself and conforming to herd mentality?

For the sake of game, NO. Waste of time.

For networking with girlies, bet on making them feel good around you, not on shared interest. Just like I mentioned already, you can do it by teasing girls about their precious idols and gossips and they can adore you for it.

With men, shared interest is more important. Networking with men is about something more tangible. I don't talk to much to guys who I have nothing in common with. If I do then it's more about curiosity of their lifestyle and worldview but I don't feel any need to be friends with them. But with men is easier I think, most men like similar things.

[Ouroboros]

(11-03-2016 05:25 AM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

As an older guy you could think of yourself as a curious visitor from another time. Girls love to play show and tell; all your points of ignorance are just great opportunities to end up back at her place.

This strategy might not be so effective for someone of my age (25), where contemporary pop culture knowledge would be assumed...however I'll keep it in mind for when I'm a bit older!
I can see the basic principle working in other contexts though (e.g. asking for directions, enquiring about some niche hobby/interest, a foreign custom etc.)

[XPQ22]

(11-03-2016 02:10 PM)Ice Wrote:  

a.) "What Instagram, what is that, I don't waste my time with stupid stuff like that. Can you explain to me how that app works, why are you using that app at all etc."

For some people that approach might work, but I think it's better if you can say:

b.) "Oh yeah sure I have Insta, you wanna follow me, my handle is XYZ." Girl: "Oh wow, you have 20k followers. I like your pics, this one looks so cool .. "

Well, no, I wouldn't put it down right out of the gate like that. The idea is to seem amused and curious, not hostile and dismissive.

Quote:

Of course, it should be something that's cool, not something that is nerdy or science related etc (unless the girl is a nerd too, but very few hot girls are). But since you're interested in travel, you can show her some of your travel pics on Insta, or show her on Youtube some cool travel lifestyle documentaries etc.

I've taken hot younger girls to the science museum before and gotten the bang from it two out of three times. It's one of my favorite first date venues - it works!

[Ouroboros]

(11-03-2016 10:48 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

But if you look at your own life, you know this belief is yours is not true.

Go to the gym.
How many men are there compared to women?
How many are doing free weights?

When women want shoes or to meet a celebrity. They'll line up around the block.

So it's not like they don't go after they want.

How many single women go to bodybuilding contests? Power lifting...Minor league basketball events? Investment banker conferences?

That should tell you that women don't actually value those things, or guys with those things.

That's why I'm always telling guys to stop focusing on bullshit to attract and retain women. Yet most of this site is about that bullshit.

This is no doubt a controversial topic on here, so as a newcomer I'll try to tread lightly...
Are you saying that women don't value guys with muscles or money? Because otherwise they would actively pursue gym goers and white collar professionals the way they pursue celebrities?
The difficulty I have with that argument is that (in my country at least) there's a large supply of fit guys with money, so they don't need to do much to get those things. Celebrities, on the other hand, are by definition a minority. Girls need to pursue them to have any chance...
Don't you think it might be more a question of supply/demand?

[Ouroboros]

(11-04-2016 05:36 AM)XXL Wrote:  

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

I've noticed they often have an encyclopaedic knowledge of movies, music and celebrities, created by a lifetime of passively consuming entertainment. If one opts to pursue a more fulfilling life of activity, hobbies, and travel, one will necessarily lack this knowledge and will therefore not comprehend meta references (sadly a social DHV in many circles) and will have less common interests to talk about.
How do you deal with this? Persistently change the subject to something else? Try to keep up with all the latest pop culture? (an endless task)

You cannot compete with a girl who's life is all about entertainment industry. You cannot play her game. But you can use her domain to game her.

Let's say she says "I love this Bieber song with Major Lazer"

Fine. I say "really? let's see.. sing it for me, come on just a few lines"

She tries to sing. Most probably her singing sucks. Perfect. Great opportunity to tease.

I go "what? this is not even that song, you made up different song with you voice, Justin would be pissed at you for that. I'd definitely would. Who knows maybe I'd find you facebook or twitter and messaged you to never sing that again, or maybe not.."

Oh she would react to that for sure. She would respond giving me even more shit to use "against her". Verbal battle would start but I'd keep it fun and silly, not trying to show her place.

And that's how you do it. You don't need to know shit about what she's saying however the more you know the more you can use to game her.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

I can see that maybe I'm placing too much emphasis on wanting common ground with girls. This actually raises an interesting question - to what extent do girls even want to share common interests with guys?

In my opinion, in terms of interests, hobbies, etc very little.

Women care how you fit their lifestyle in general ie whether they can go out with you, whether they can introduce you to their friends and family, whether you lifestyle is somewhat similar. Things like that.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

Many of them are interested in fashion, dance, gossip etc., but I imagine a guy with the same interests would seem effeminate/repulsive (although some obviously like dancers).

Fine, let them be that way. You don't need to. You can be too but you don't get some kind of special magic points for that.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

Similarly, surely an active guy with experiences would seem more appealing than a couch potato who watches TV/movies all the time? (I should mention I don't actually dislike entertainment, I just think my generation - millennials - way overdo it)

True because active guy is more healthy, masculine, exciting. See the pattern? It all matters how the guy makes them feel. Women do not give a flying fuck HOW you make you look good, strong, masculine. Most of them actually think gym is for retards. But they like to be dominated, carried on, fucked well, etc. They care about what they get out of it. It's pure selfish.

(11-03-2016 04:33 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

do you think it's in general worth trying to immerse yourself in the interests of others for the sake of game? Spending hours on something that does nothing for you feels like a massive waste, but on the other hand networking, game and socialising are obviously very fulfilling and necessary, and these are often based on shared interests (e.g. the hipsters' love for obscure bands) - where does one draw the line between staying true to oneself and conforming to herd mentality?

For the sake of game, NO. Waste of time.

For networking with girlies, bet on making them feel good around you, not on shared interest. Just like I mentioned already, you can do it by teasing girls about their precious idols and gossips and they can adore you for it.

With men, shared interest is more important. Networking with men is about something more tangible. I don't talk to much to guys who I have nothing in common with. If I do then it's more about curiosity of their lifestyle and worldview but I don't feel any need to be friends with them. But with men is easier I think, most men like similar things.

Very helpful and insightful post.

[WestIndianArchie]

(11-04-2016 07:28 AM)Ouroboros Wrote:  

(11-03-2016 10:48 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

But if you look at your own life, you know this belief is yours is not true.

Go to the gym.
How many men are there compared to women?
How many are doing free weights?

When women want shoes or to meet a celebrity. They'll line up around the block.

So it's not like they don't go after they want.

How many single women go to bodybuilding contests? Power lifting...Minor league basketball events? Investment banker conferences?

That should tell you that women don't actually value those things, or guys with those things.

That's why I'm always telling guys to stop focusing on bullshit to attract and retain women. Yet most of this site is about that bullshit.

This is no doubt a controversial topic on here, so as a newcomer I'll try to tread lightly...
Are you saying that women don't value guys with muscles or money? Because otherwise they would actively pursue gym goers and white collar professionals the way they pursue celebrities?
The difficulty I have with that argument is that (in my country at least) there's a large supply of fit guys with money, so they don't need to do much to get those things. Celebrities, on the other hand, are by definition a minority. Girls need to pursue them to have any chance...
Don't you think it might be more a question of supply/demand?

It's a question of how do women behave.
How do they think?
What is their psychology?

When you start going out, really pay attention to how women act around guys that have these traits.

Don't just focus on when the guy has success. If a cute girl walks by Tyrone Mandingo or Chad Thundercock - what does she do? What does he do?

You will see with your own eyes, how often she doesn't notice all of his external qualities. She doesn't approach. She doesn't make eye contact. She doesn't stop and linger.

She's in her own world. It's rare that a cute chick, much less a hot one, will do much to go after what she likes. That's why you can find groups of very successful men gathering, and hot bitches are not there.

And often times a guy can look good visually, or have the right stuff on paper, and when he approaches the cute girl, he loses all that currency by not being able to handle her.

Fuck some chicks and ask them about guys they thought were cute, but didn't end up fucking. They'll tell you all sorts of stuff that you NEVER pay attention to, but it's all she pays attention to.

And at a certain level of hotness, every guy around her is rich, tall, good looking, good body. If she thought like a man, she'd just pick the best one and call it a day. That's never the case.

But please, do not take my word for it.

Start going out and talking to chicks, and getting them in bed, and then start asking
Start observing the world. Why does this blond 6 foot dude not get the chick, but that dark haired 5'9" dude get her. How come you have all these guys in expensive cars going home alone? Why does the testosterone crew come to the bar in a group and leave as a group?

Why does the bartender get so much female attention?
Why does the bouncer barely get any attention?
Why does the break dancer draw a crowd, but never pull a chick?

Reading about game, asking questions about game, is only 10% of the battle.

You need to go out there and observe, experience.

A lot of the stuff you thought about the world is wrong.
You'd only know it was wrong if you tested it.
Most of the guys don't test their assumptions.

When you realize a lot of that get educated, get fit, get dressed stuff out there actually
does not bring the girl of your dreams to your bedroom,
Then you'll start to take this shit seriously, instead of it being some intellectual curiosity.

WIA

[XPQ22]

(11-04-2016 10:23 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

Fuck some chicks and ask them about guys they thought were cute, but didn't end up fucking. They'll tell you all sorts of stuff that you NEVER pay attention to, but it's all she pays attention to.

Why does this blond 6 foot dude not get the chick, but that dark haired 5'9" dude get her.

The blond 6 foot dude came on full blast as a player, and made her feel like she'd be just another notch at best. Didn't leave the possibility for a relationship open-ended, worried too much about being "friend-zoned" and "binned as LTR material" and things of that nature right out the gate before she's even determined if she could stand listening to him for more than a half-hour. "You should be grateful you have the opportunity to touch a handsome player like myself!" Let ego get in the way.

The blond 6 foot dude didn't know how to offer plausible deniability. Her friends would be gossiping about what happened between her and that "bro from the club" for months.

The blond 6 foot dude didn't have a narrative. The latter one did. "Oh you work as a pharmacy tech and like beer, huh? Fascinating."

The blond dude simply talked too much about lame shit, and never listened.

And, amazingly enough, sometimes the 6 foot blond dude can't muster up the courage to turn to her and say "Hey, what's that crazy drink you got there?" after she picks up her order at the bar.

Quote:

A lot of the stuff you thought about the world is wrong.
You'd only know it was wrong if you tested it.
Most of the guys don't test their assumptions.

Once earlier this year, I met a nurse in a bar, in Anytown, Massachusetts. She was beautiful, and lonely.

We were definitely from two very different places in life. I wasn't really sure what to talk about at one point, so I fell back to talking about talking a little about work. About soldering little bits of wire and components together to build things. I told her how having a little world of sanity that follows natural laws in this universe that often doesn't make sense was a precious gift, and I would never retire until someone pulled my tools from my dead fingers.

She had that "sparkle" in her eyes as she listened - turns out she had an uncle who was an electrical engineer that she had cared for very much, who had died several years previous.

And we soon headed out to my car to head on to her place, smiling together, with little more to say.

[polymath]

Welcome. I have a slightly different take on this.

You can definitely get somewhere with pop culture knowledge, but (A) you're implicitly selecting a certain category of women when you choose to focus on any topic as the bread and butter of your verbal script, and(B) there may be other topics or pursuits where you can get a much higher return-per-hour-invested.

When I was in college I met a girl who was president of her student body at a women's college nearby. She came over to my fraternity with a girl who was dating one of my brothers at that time. I mentioned some news item I had read on Reuters or wherever that same morning, mostly just talking to my brother, and as we talked about it she chimed in with an opinion and let slip "oh we brushed up on current events before we came over."

She was husband hunting, and she did the work to engage the type of guy that she wanted.

I saw her a few times after that, got pretty intimate/naked with her a couple times but never got the bang, and lost touch after a few weeks. Still, the memory of that comment remains with me. First, if you're attractive to her, a girl will do the work to connect with you conversationally and familiarize herself with your interests. Second, you tend to connect with people who look at the same parts of the world that you look at.

That's point (A). Point (B) is a little simpler. You don't have infinite time. You can spend four hours drawing a family tree for the Jenner/Kardashian family, and it will actually help you keep up in some conversations. You can also take that four hours to go to the gym and delete any unflattering or lame pics from your Instagram, and it will make you seem more attractive online and in person. Alternatively, you can update your resume and send it off to ten companies that offer better paying jobs than your current one, and it may result in an upgrade to your lifestyle.

Don't assume that just because something is positive, it's a good use of time. Always choose your actions by comparing them to the alternatives.

[XPQ22]

Something I do that seems to get a positive reaction from plates and club randos alike: even though you may not have a lot of common ground, when you do hit on one of those items of pop-culture knowledge that you have in common, apply "agree and amplify" to it. Give it your own unique spin.

"Oh, yeah, I saw season 1 of Penny Dreadful too. Dr. Frankenstein? Yep, I call him 'Gotho McDandypants.' All he does is shoot heroin all day, complain, and occasionally re-animiate the dead - which is his actual job. Haven't our other heroes figured out this cat is dead weight, already?"

[Ouroboros]

(11-04-2016 01:27 PM)polymath Wrote:  

You don't have infinite time. You can spend four hours drawing a family tree for the Jenner/Kardashian family, and it will actually help you keep up in some conversations. You can also take that four hours to go to the gym and delete any unflattering or lame pics from your Instagram, and it will make you seem more attractive online and in person. Alternatively, you can update your resume and send it off to ten companies that offer better paying jobs than your current one, and it may result in an upgrade to your lifestyle.

Don't assume that just because something is positive, it's a good use of time. Always choose your actions by comparing them to the alternatives.

So true: there are a million ways to skin a cat, but only 24hrs in a day to learn them all (8 of which should be spent asleep)...
Should you specialise on a few things which align with your interests and which have high gaming ROI, or should you spread yourself thinly in the hope of appealing to ever broader demographics?
It's a trade-off for which there is no simple formula; but reading the experiences of other men on this forum and finessing one's approach through trial and error seems the surest path.
Thanks to everyone for contributing to this thread. I'll probably dedicate 1/2 hour or so a week from now on familiarising myself with pop culture knowledge to enhance the material I have to work with without wasting too much time, while practising the game strategies outlined by posters above to take advantage of points of ignorance.
Cheers guys!